Talking was too painful. Both physically and emo-tionally. Paige let me sleep on her sofa. She consoled me and helped me wipe away my tears . Well, there weren’t any more tears, but there was a lot of slurred whining. However, our top ten list of “Why Savannah was a better catch than Miss Redhead”—made in conjunction with the viewing of David Letterman—was rather cathartic.
Morning came crashing in hard and furious. My head was killing me from a caffeine overdose . The only highlight was that my lip had retreated to a somewhat normal level. And the lowlight was my mother’s message regarding my depiction of her in today’s column.
I stared at Paige’s check in my hand. Two thousand dollars. Liberation.
Ms. Austin was on the morning news. The local news-caster found it hard to believe that she was born and raised in the South.
“Why? Southerners aren’t all big hats and afternoon tea. Some of us like our coffee as espressos and some of us favor black to pastels. There is a progressive voice of the South that is unmistakably being voiced and heard.”
The recent journalism-school grad responded,“I can see where that would be true.”
“I’m just trying to help people from my part of the world realize that the conservative mind-set of the old South isn’t what this new generation needs or truly desires.”
“What do you feel this generation desires?”
“Someone who listens. And actually hears . Then fights to help implement their concerns and ideals. And who helps their voice to be heard.”
“Well,we’re glad you had a few moments to spend with us this morning. Ladies and gentlemen, Ms. Faith Austin.”
Faith smiled that perfect smile. She had it . Whatever it was. She had it.
I tilled alone. It was best. God and I had a lot of talking to do. He seemed quiet. Again. So I just kept the conversation going. Reminding Him how miserably last night had transpired. Nothing to my liking. And nothing to His, I was certain. Reminding Him that if He was passing out more it, I would like some of my own. By the time I was through, the only consolation I could imagine was Coke. Coke and flip-flops. No pearls today. It hadn’t rained down. No use in trying to pretend. At least for now.
The question slammed into me as soon as I entered the back door.“I expected you last night . You said you would be there.”
“No sir, I said I would try.”
He leaned against the steel counter that held my liquid delight and extended a cup.
I took the cup from his hand, filled it full of ice, and watched the dark, powerful fluid flow.“My meeting took a detour and I had to regroup.” I leaned against the counter while the events of last night came back like a stampede. I took a long swig of my Coke, which burned all the way down. Nothing was so good. “Whoo! That’s good stuff.”
“So, your dinner with Grant didn’t go as you expected?” he asked with a perfectly stoic expression.
Had I possessed any remaining liquid in my mouth, it would have surely escaped through every cavity in my head.“I’m not sure I know what you’re talking about.”
“Savannah, did you know that not telling the entire truth is really not truth at all?”
I pursed my lips and wrinkled my brow and turned to stare at him.“How do you know everything?” He started to give a quick response.“No, seriously, Dad . How do parents know everything? Is there not one thing I can do that you wouldn’t know of?”
“You know how we know, Savannah? Because there is part of us inside of you. And we know ourselves very well.” He tapped me on my nose, then proceeded to head back into the front of the shop.“By the way, your article was . . . interesting.”
I headed straight to the paper and snatched a copy of the morning news from Marla’s desk. I greeted her quickly but friendly and headed to my hallowed haven. But I wasn’t to sit. No, Jessica buzzed me as soon as I entered my hole; Mr. Hicks wanted to see me.
I would be fired. I was certain. Who wouldn’t be certain? I couldn’t do anything right. Except create a blaring headline. Oh, yes, I had mastered that one. I walked slowly. Even wanted to scream, “Dead woman walking!” But who would care? Most would be glad. I would give Paige her money back. I would live with my mother and die old and wretched.
Jessica had disappeared into obnoxious oblivion. I was grateful. She made me weary. Mr. Hicks was snacking on a country ham biscuit and had more crumbs on his tie than around his mouth.
“Oh, Savannah. Come in, come in.” He tried to brush away the remnants of breakfast from his face unsuccessfully. “I wanted you to know you did a great job with your story . You gave me a kick,” he said, chuckling.“I wish I could have seen your mother in a silk eye mask. I didn’t even know all the activity that was happening around there.”
I sat down across from him more confident.“Well, thank you, sir. I’m glad you liked it.”
“Yeah.” He placed the other half of his biscuit aside and brushed the crumbs from his desk. “I thought you would give us some ‘sidewalk sermons’ like your mother has been giving on the evening news. But you branched out, young lady. Gave us a laugh and kept self-righteous opinions to yourself. Couldn’t have written it better myself. Now, go get ready for tomorrow’s deadline.”
“Well, thank you, sir. Really, thank you so much.” As I started out the door, I noticed a yellow file on his desk bearing Joshua’s name and a “Dated Material” stamp. Joshua’s story. Unopened. I couldn’t help it.“Did you not read Joshua’s story?”
“What?” He looked down, confused.“Oh, this?” He picked up the file.“No, I haven’t gotten to it yet.”
“But it’s dated. It was for today’s paper!”
“Oh, I didn’t notice.”
“How could you not notice?” I asked, incredulous.
“Because I didn’t, Savannah,” he snapped.
“Well, you should have . You really should have.”
I left, my cadence not as enthusiastic as Mr. Hicks’s compliments of my work warranted. And the nuisance coming up the aisle conjured the usual dread. Jessica turned the corner and headed in my direction, with none other than Faith Austin at her side. The city’s new darling looked exceptionally fabulous today. Her long dark hair spread symmetrically across her shoulders, and her camel-color pants and matching lace top looked almost tie-dyed.
I hesitated for a moment. I felt too casual next to this woman in my flip-flops and white capris. Jessica didn’t even notice me until we were practically flip-flop to Ferragamo.
“Hello, Ms. Austin,” I said with a nod. “Jessica.”
“Savannah,” Jessica snipped.
“Hello, Savannah. How are you this morning?”
“Doing great, thank you very much. Just heading back to work . What are you ladies up to this morning?”
“We were trying to have a conversation,” Jessica snapped.“And I believe this conversation was between A and B”—she pointed to her and Ms. Austin—“so why don’t you C your way out of it?”
I raised my right eyebrow and fought desperately not to laugh in her face.
Ms. Austin had trouble hiding her smirk as well and spoke to me anyway.“I liked your article today. I expected a downright assault. But you were rather refreshing . The Pilates episode got me good.”
“Well, I’m glad you enjoyed it. I’m still trying to wrap my mind around the whole thing though.”
“That shouldn’t take too long.” Peanut gallery.
The two mature ones tried to ignore the child.
“Ms. Austin!” came Mr. Hicks’s voice. He was smiling like a child with a crush on the teacher. “Come on in here and let’s get this interview going.” He ignored both Jessica and me as he took Ms. Austin by the hand and began to lead her to his office.
She looked back with a smile.“Maybe we can have dinner soon.” Her cell phone rang as she turned around. She answered it with a rather perturbed,“Hello?”
Mr. Hicks closed the door behind them and left Jessica staring at the veneer.
“I guess you’ll have to C your way out,” I said with a shameless giggle. I deserved to laugh.
“Be careful with those two,” came the voice over my shoulder as I descended the stairs . The same voice that had snickered over my shoulder yesterday as Grant walked out of my life and into the land of regrettable remembrances.
“Well, I would think you would find both of them stunningly beautiful,” I said, ignoring the bounce of his curls that I was certain were following me.
“You clearly have no idea what I find beautiful. I can see right through women like them.” He kept his steps on my heels.
“Oh you can, can you?”
“Yes, and I can see through women like you too.”
I opened the door to the first floor and turned to stare him down. I expected a smirk. Even a wide-eyed smile. But he just stared back. It was a look I’d never seen on his face in the less than two weeks we’d known each other. It forced a nervous laugh. Odd for me, with this annoyance.“See through me? What are you talking about? Everyone else seems to like my article,Mr. North.”
“I’m not talking about your article. That is an issue in and of itself. I’m talking about yesterday at the coffee shop. You acted pathetic, Ms. Phillips.”
“How dare you talk to me like that? I don’t have to listen to this, coming from a man who doesn’t even have a car.” I turned on my heels, or not, to my pitiful world. My word. I had just defended this man to my boss. I knew he would follow. I knew he would reply. But he didn’t. He left me there . With pathetic and Ms. Phillips dangling like piercing participles in the air.