Conversation 1
‘I’m sorry about last night, Dave,’ I said, lying down on the hotel bed, the phone pressed against my left ear, held in place by my cocked head and shoulder.
‘It’s OK,’ said my namesake. ‘I understand. I think. You were excited.’
‘Yeah,’ I paused. ‘Oh, by the way, have you ever had trouble getting into Australia?’
‘I have actually,’ said David, surprised. ‘How did you know?’
‘I applied for an Electronic Travel Authority,’ I explained. ‘Because of another David Gorman I wasn’t allowed to get it online, I had to go to the embassy. I guess the same thing would have happened to you too!’
‘Oh, it was years ago when I had trouble,’ explained David. ‘I was living in London at the time and I flew to Australia. I’m Canadian, I’m living in the UK, I figure that Australia’s part of the Commonwealth too so I didn’t think I needed a visa. So I just flew in and got turned away. I was on the first flight back to London, then I got my visa sorted out and then I flew back the next day.’
We both laughed lightly at the ridiculousness of it all. And then a thought hit me. What had the girl at the embassy said? ‘Someone with the same name as you and a very similar birthday is on our list.’
‘David,’ I said, ‘you might be the reason I had the trouble. You turning up without a visa might be the reason our name is on the list! When’s your birthday?’
‘February the 3rd,’ said David, ‘why?’
I raised my left arm and cocked my head some more. I saw my tattoo. With the date of birth given as 03-02, not 02-03.
‘Do you have a ginger facial hair?’ I asked.
‘Yeah.’
‘I forbid you to grow a beard.’
‘Whatever you say, Dave,’ said David. ‘Say, what are you going to do about the novel.’
‘I’ve got an idea,’ I said. ‘I’ve got an idea.’
Conversation 2
‘Look, Dave,’ said Jake. ‘It’s very simple. You owe us the money back. That’s all there is to it.’
‘But I’ve got an idea,’ I said.
‘What?’
‘How about I write a book about my googlewhack adventure?’
‘But that wouldn’t be a novel,’ said Jake. ‘I commissioned a novel, a work of fiction.’
‘Well, what if I changed the name of the central character. Called him Gavin? Then it’d be a novel.’
‘Don’t be stupid, Dave. You’ve let us down. You owe us the money.’
Conversation 3
‘Hello Rob.’
‘Dave.’
‘I’m sorry about all that … stuff,’ I said.
‘That’s OK,’ he said. ‘It’s your own stupid fault for thinking you could write a novel. Ridiculous, Dave. You were very busy. I had a lot of work lined up for you, things were on a roll.’
‘And now that’s all gone?’ I asked.
‘Well, I’ve got a few ideas,’ he said. ‘Have you got your diary?’
Conversation 4
‘Thanks for the money, Dave,’ said Jake. ‘I think we should draw a line under that and leave it there. It’s in the past.’
‘I doubt you’ll ever want to speak to me again after all this,’ I said. ‘I am sorry.’
‘Actually I have got a few things I’d like to talk about,’ said Jake. ‘I’ve been speaking to a few people in different departments and I’ve had an idea I think you might like.’
‘Go on.’
‘Non-fiction are interested,’ he said. ‘How about you write a book about your Googlewhack Adventure?’
‘That’s brilliant, Jake,’ I said. ‘I wish I’d thought of it!’