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Graham
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AFTER LEAVING CHLOE’S, I stopped at the liquor store and picked up a case of beer. Now that my next few days were pretty much screwed with the shit Tank was signing me up for, I decided to forget the bar. The last thing I needed was to be hungover while playing Santa Claus. It was already a headache waiting to happen and I didn’t need to add to it.
When I arrived at my apartment, I cracked open a beer, threw a frozen pizza into the oven, and walked into the living room. As I glanced around, I noticed how cold and bare it looked, especially without a Christmas tree. Even Chloe’s place seemed more inviting and she still had unopened boxes sitting everywhere.
I scowled and took a swig of my beer.
Fuck Christmas decorations.
I was not going to waste time or money on a damn tree. For one, I didn’t have enough ornaments, maybe a handful I’d made at school as a kid. For two, trees were outrageously expensive. Raptor had mentioned paying over one-hundred dollars for a real fucking tree. To me it was highway robbery, especially since you could only use it once. For three, I wasn’t in the mood for celebrating Christmas. I felt like it had fucked me over last year and it was already biting me in the ass. The only enjoyment I’d seen coming was the snowmobile trip and now those plans were out the window because of the damn holiday. To make matters worse, I was being forced to dress up in a ridiculous costume and pretend to be jolly.
What a fucking nightmare.
Christmas was supposed to be about giving and spending time with family—and I was grateful to have found a new one. Even better, I now had the Gold Vipers, which should have been enough. But, it didn’t feel like it. The truth was, I still felt empty inside and it was causing me to feel down-in-the-dumps. I wanted to shake it off. Tell myself that it was just a temporary setback. But I just couldn’t.
I was too cynical at the moment.
I guess it was true about Christmas being one of the loneliest times of the year for many people. I would have never imagined myself being in that category, but here I was.
Taking another sip of beer, I pulled out my phone and almost called Bonnie. Fortunately, I stopped myself; as lonely as I was feeling, my pride was still strong enough to keep me level. One night with Bonnie and I’d be under her spell again. I couldn’t afford to go down that road again.
I turned on the television and saw a holiday commercial with a woman who reminded me of Chloe in a way.
I sighed.
Untouchable, classy Chloe...
I wondered if there was a man in her life, besides her ex-roommate. It was hard to imagine a hot chick like her didn’t have a lot of guys sniffing around. Of course, beauty wasn’t skin-deep, and she could be very high-maintenance or have some hidden baggage.
I turned on a hockey game and told myself to forget about women for a while and enjoy my solitude. As lonely as it was, it was safe and stress-free. Some people would kill for that during the holidays.