Now I had to tell Patience. It wouldn’t wait. As soon as Richard left that morning, I hurried to the Ames house.
When Patience opened the door to my insistent knock, she knew something was different. She grasped my hands and drew me into her house.
“What’s happened?” she asked.
“You’ll never believe it, Patience. I’m going to be married!”
She dropped my hands and stared at me, her mouth agape. She sat down on a stool directly behind her, as if her legs would no longer hold her up.
“To Arthur?” she asked, giving me a confused look.
“No. Do you remember Richard, the man you met at my house?”
“Yes. That disreputable-looking young man with the shabby boots.”
I laughed. I didn’t care how she described him. “That’s him. He asked me to marry him and I’ve accepted! Oh, Patience, I’m so very happy!”
“But I don’t understand. Who is he? Where is he from? How come you haven’t mentioned him more often?”
“He’s from London, where he attended medical college. He became friendly with my father when they did business together, and when I decided to take over the apothecary he asked if I would continue my father’s business association with him. I have spent only a short amount of time with him alone, but that is all I needed. He brings me joy, even as I grieve for my parents.”
“I’m so very happy for you, Sarah.” But she didn’t sound happy.
I was taken aback at the disappointment in her voice. “What’s wrong, Patience?” I asked.
“You and I are close friends, or at least I thought we were. I suppose I’m just shocked that you didn’t care to tell me more about Richard before announcing your engagement.”
“Please don’t be offended, Patience. It’s all happened so quickly, and I didn’t recognize the feelings I was having toward him. He makes me feel more special than Arthur ever did.”
“Those are the types of things I hoped you would tell me when the time came for you to meet the man you would marry. Not merely introduce me to him and then shortly afterward announce that you’re marrying him.”
“I’m sorry, Patience. I thought you’d be happy.”
“I am happy. Really, I am. I just wish I had been included in your happiness before now.”
“What can I do to make you feel better?” I asked.
“You can tell me about every time you met with him. I want to know everything.”
I laughed. “Most of the times we spoke together it was about business or my mother or my father. It has only been recently that my feelings have become … different.”
“So tell me about those times!” she exclaimed. I could tell from her voice that I had been forgiven for not including her from the time I met Richard, and I proceeded to tell her all about our more recent meetings, but I left out the parts about his job and his indentured servitude.
I knew she would ask, though.
“And how does he earn his living?” she asked.
I had been thinking about how I would respond to such a question.
“He treats people with injuries and illnesses.”
“So he is an apothecary, too?” she asked, her eyes wide with surprise.
“Not exactly,” I said.
“Oh, of course he is a physician. You said he attended medical college in London.”
“He is a type of physician, yes.”
“But what type?” she pressed.
“He was not able to finish his studies. Not yet. He works on a ship, treating the men aboard.”
“Oh, I see. What a thrilling job!” she exclaimed. It was clear from her reaction that she did not understand the full implication of what I had told her. She did not realize he worked on a pirate ship.
Should I tell her the full truth? I decided to give it some thought before making a commitment to tell her.
“When will you see him again?” she asked.
“Later today. He’s coming to the shop to give me a list of the provisions he requires for his next voyage.”
Patience was silent for several long moments while one of her younger sisters came to sit on my lap. I played a game with her before setting her back on the floor.
“Are you afraid he won’t come back from his voyage?” Patience finally asked. Her sister was out of earshot.
I felt a stab of something—was it fear? Helplessness? I didn’t know, but I didn’t relish the feeling. Of course it was something I had thought about, but I hadn’t expected to hear the question spoken aloud.
“I can see it in your face. Of course you’re afraid,” Patience said. “I’m sorry I asked the question.”
“Don’t be sorry,” I assured her, reaching for her hand. “You’re right. I am afraid, but I will hope and pray that he returns safely. He will be in God’s hands.”
“You are so brave,” Patience said.
Not even brave enough to tell you he’s a pirate, I thought, suppressing a grimace.
I rose and walked to the door. “I wanted you to be the first person to know about the engagement,” I told my friend. “I have to go back to the house. Captain Eli is coming today to have his wound redressed.”
“Captain Eli?” she cried. “Don’t be there alone with him, I beg you!”
“If you could see him, you wouldn’t worry,” I told her. “He’s so badly wounded that he couldn’t catch me even if he gave chase around the apothecary.” I chuckled.
“How did he get hurt?” she asked.
“That is a good question.”
I returned home to find Captain Eli waiting for me at the apothecary door. He was leaning against the door frame, his face flushed and sweating despite the cold wind that was buffeting the house. He held a large sack in his hand.
“Come in,” I said briskly. I unlocked the door for him and waited as he limped inside. His coloring was better than it had been the day before, so I knew his condition hadn’t worsened.
He mopped the sweat off his forehead with a grimy sleeve.
“Girl, this hurts summat fierce.”
“My name is not girl. It is Miss Hanover. And I know your leg hurts. You have a serious injury. But you did the right thing in coming here for help, and I’ll examine the leg when I unwrap the bandage. I’ll wrap the leg with a fresh one and then you’ll need to come by again tomorrow to have it dressed again. After that, maybe not every day. We’ll see how it looks tomorrow. Now, let me see that leg.” My mind screamed in protest again over treating the man, but in my heart I knew I was doing the right thing.
The old captain seated himself heavily on the stool he had occupied the previous day. He set his sack on the floor and lifted the leg of his breeches.
I reached for the dressing and he pulled his leg away just a little bit, eyeing me warily.
“I have to put fresh bandages on your leg.” I looked down at the filthy cloth on his leg, then met his eyes. He scowled. He reminded me of an animal in pain—aware that I was trying to help, but fiercely protective of himself.
“And you won’t tell me how this happened?” I asked.
“It’s none ‘o yer business.”
Slowly and carefully so as not to jar the injury, I unwrapped the cloth from around his leg. I reached for a magnifying glass I kept nearby and examined the wound closely.
“This is better than it was yesterday,” I said, almost to myself.
“Then why isn’t the pain going away?” he asked harshly.
“You need to give it time. Injuries like this can take a long time to heal. You’re lucky you don’t have to go to sea anymore.”
“Nothing lucky about it, Gir—Miss.”
I raised my eyebrows ever so slightly and suppressed a smile.
After I had satisfied myself that the wound was no worse, I slathered another measure of honey on it. I had been crouching next to the stool where Captain Eli was seated and I had to straighten up to reach the roll of clean bandages that sat on the counter just a few feet away.
Captain Eli used my awkward stance to reach for my arm. He grabbed it with a strength I would not have expected and squeezed—hard.
“What are you doing?” I cried. “Let go of me!” I tried flailing my arm to loosen his grip, but he only squeezed harder.
“Tell me why yer asking people about me.”
“I haven’t asked anyone about you,” I said, squirming.
“I know you have. I’ve gotten wind of it.”
“Well, it is not true.” I grunted as I continued struggling to free my arm. I could feel my breath coming faster. I had assured Patience that this man was no match for me in his injured state, but that had obviously been untrue. He seemed to have lost none of the strength in his arm and hand.
I gave one mighty heave of my arm and, by the grace of God, he lost his balance and toppled off the stool. He was trying to push himself up when the apothecary door opened and Richard swept into the room, his eyes taking in the scene in an instant.
He rushed over to where Captain Eli was grunting in pain, still trying to right himself, and yanked him up by the arm.
“What the devil do you think you’re doing?” he said in a low, deadly voice. If he hadn’t been protecting me, I would have been afraid of that voice.
“Nothin’,” the captain sputtered. “I just lost my balance, that’s all.” He shot me a look that warned me not to say anything, but Richard knew the truth.
“Did you try to touch this young lady?” Richard demanded.
“Of course not,” the captain said, a trace of false indignation in his voice.
“You’re lying. Let me tell you something, Eli. If I ever catch you near Miss Hanover again, I’ll tear your limbs out one by one myself. Do you understand that?”
“Yes,” growled the captain. “Now let go of me.”
Richard didn’t let go of the captain’s arm yet, but turned to me instead. “Are you done with this good-for-nothing wretch, or do you need my help to restrain him while you work?”
“I’m done,” I said in a clear voice. My confidence had returned with Richard’s arrival.
Richard released the captain’s arm with a rough shove. “Now out you go. And don’t come back here.”
“I have to come back tomorrow to have me dressing changed,” the captain whined.
Richard turned to me again. “Do you have some clean bandages you can send with him?” I nodded and reached for two rolls of cloth. Richard took them and thrust them at Captain Eli.
“Take these. You’ll be changing your own dressing from now on. Now be gone.” He glowered at the captain, who looked suddenly meek and harmless. We both watched the captain as he made his slow way to the door and closed it behind him.
I heaved a sigh of relief, not realizing I had barely been breathing since the captain grabbed my arm.
“I’m so grateful you came when you did,” I said to Richard. “I didn’t think he would be a danger to me, but I was wrong.”
“I hope you won’t have any more trouble from him, but you must remember to keep the apothecary door locked from now on. That way you don’t have to let him in if you see him standing out there. And don’t open the door in the house unless you know who’s standing outside, either.” He gathered me to his chest. “I can’t bear the thought of something happening to you.”
I smiled into his shirt. “I’ll keep the door locked,” I said in a muffled voice.
“Good.”
“Do you have the list of things you’ll need for the trip?” I asked, pushing myself away from him with reluctance.
He pulled a small piece of paper from his coat pocket. “Here it is. Paper is hard to come by, so I had to write everything on this little scrap. I’ll read it to you.”
As he read the list of items he would need, I was surprised and relieved to learn that I already had all the necessary supplies and I would not require a delivery from Philadelphia. I gathered everything into a pile on the counter against the back wall. There were dental pelicans, dressings, syringes, and cupping glasses. I shuddered when he asked for an instrument that he would use for bullet extractions.
When I had gathered everything on his list, he helped me pack it securely into a wooden box. He lifted the box and set in on the floor, then he moved around a number of other boxes and hid his box behind the rest.
“When will you be back for it?” I asked.
“Tonight, long after dark. If you’d like me to hide it somewhere outside so I don’t wake you up, that would be fine. I don’t think the captain will be back anytime soon, so you don’t have to worry about him finding it.”
“I won’t be able to sleep, knowing you’re coming for the box. I’ll be awake. That way I can at least help you get it outside,” I answered in a murmur. There was no reason to lower my voice, since we were the only ones in sight, but somehow the secretive nature of our movements made me wish to keep my voice low.
“Then I look forward to seeing you in the middle of the night, my love,” Richard said, leaning down to kiss me. I felt that same thrill I had the last time—would I feel that thrill for the rest of my life? I thought it very likely. We agreed on a secret knock for him to use.
I watched him walk away, his footsteps crunching in the snow. I gazed for a moment at my father’s boots on Richard’s feet and made a decision. I would sort through the rest of Pappa’s clothes—there weren’t many—and decide what might fit Richard and what could be given to someone else. Perhaps Richard would know of someone on his ship who needed clothes in my father’s size.
But first I peeked into the sack Captain Eli had brought with him. Indeed, there was a large packet of sugar in the sack and two tins of tea leaves. I wondered where the captain had obtained such fine items, but then I remembered that he had spent many years at sea. He probably had a large supply of sugar and tea at his home.
I stored the sugar and tea on the shelf near the fireplace and then turned my attention to Pappa’s clothes.
Going through the trunk again reminded me painfully of the letter I had found written to my father by my grandmamma. At the time I had found the letter, I had been too overwrought to do much of anything about it, but now a plan began to formulate in my mind.
Mister Browne was the person who had pointed the finger of suspicion at the captain. Did he know more than he was saying? Was Captain Eli the person Grandmamma had been referring to in the letter?
I needed to find Mister Browne and ask him to divulge any information he had about the captain, even if he thought it was too rough and disturbing for my ears to hear.
I was careful to fold the letter along its original creases, then I put it in my pocket before leaving the house to go into town. I knew where Mister Browne lived with his wife and children and I intended to go straight to his home to ask for his help. I hoped I would find him there.
The Browne family lived on a narrow street that ran parallel to the water. The house was two stories tall and painted an exquisite shade of blue the color of a robin’s egg. It was one of the only painted houses in town.
I marched up the front steps and knocked on the door quickly, before I could lose my determination. While I waited for someone to answer my knock, I turned around to survey the rest of the street. There were three other houses, also two stories each. One was on the same side of the street as the Brownes’ house and the other two stood facing them across a muddy path that served as a road.
The door opened behind me and I whirled around to face a woman wearing servants’ dress and staring at me expectantly.
“Yes, hello. My name is Sarah Hanover and I’m here to see Mister Browne, if I might. Is he home?” I took a deep breath, wondering how I had managed to state my business without stammering.
“Just a moment. I’ll announce you,” the young woman said. She left me on the porch as she closed the door and retreated inside the house. She was back in just a few moments. She beckoned for me to follow her and I stepped into the warm, inviting hallway beyond the front door.
She led me to a parlor to the left of the door and invited me to sit while I waited for Mister Browne. Presently he came into the room, a perplexed look on his face. I stood up quickly.
“To what do I owe this honor?” he asked, bowing slightly in my direction.
“I’ve come to ask some questions about Captain Eli, sir,” I responded. “I know you have heard … things … about him and I was hoping you could share them with me.”
“What sorts of ‘things’ do you mean?”
“I mean, you told my father that Captain Eli had made some unsavory remarks about my mother. I would like you to elaborate, if you would be so kind.”
Mister Browne rubbed his beard as he sat down on a settee, gesturing for me to be seated again in the chair opposite him. I complied.
“I am not sure you really want to hear the things Captain Eli said about your mother,” Mister Browne said. “To be frank, they were vulgar remarks that have no place in polite society. But then, Captain Eli has yet to show a desire to be a part of polite society.”
“I realize that, sir, but I believe my mother was the victim of a violent act at the time of her death. I want to know if you are aware of her ever being threatened bodily by the captain.”
Mister Browne rubbed his hand along his beard again, as if trying to decide if he should tell me anything. I waited, my hands folded in my lap, my face a mask of patience. On the inside, though, I was agitated and anxious.
Finally he spoke. “Captain Eli has always believed your mother loved him. Ever since she arrived in New Jersey.”
I let a tiny gasp escape before I remembered to maintain my pretense of calm. Mister Browne gave me a sharp look, paused for a moment, then continued.
“Of course everyone knows it’s rubbish, but the man has persisted with such rants since he met her. I’m afraid, Sarah, that it’s nothing more than a case of lust, combined with his obvious madness.”
I took a deep breath to steady my nerves. I knew Mister Browne would not like my next question.
“Mister Browne, do you think Captain Eli could have been behind my mother’s disappearance two years ago?”
Mister Browne was silent for a long time. I was afraid he wouldn’t answer me. When he spoke, his shoulders fell and his eyes took on a troubled look.
“I wish I knew, Sarah. But I have no idea. He’s never admitted to anything, of course, and I don’t know of any other instances when he has been violent toward a woman. Men, yes. But women, none of which I am aware.”
That didn’t help me very much. But it made sense that a man who made terribly lewd comments about a woman, especially a married woman, might go to great lengths to take her for himself if he thought he could get away with it. I thanked Mister Browne for his information and returned home. He promised to let me know if he heard anything else about the captain.
I was rounding the bend in the road by Widow Beall’s house when I was shocked to see Captain Eli making his way into the woods from her farm. I could tell from his distinctive limp. I hastened to Widow Beall’s front door, hoping and praying that the captain had not been causing trouble for her.
I am afraid I startled her when she opened the door. “Widow Beall!” I cried. She took a step backward in surprise, so I tried to speak more calmly. “I just saw Captain Eli traipsing into the woods beyond your farm. Has that unctuous ruffian been tormenting you?”
Widow Beall smiled. “That old toad? He knows better than to meddle with me. Don’t you worry about us, Sarah. We’re fine here.”
“I’m so glad to hear it, Widow. Please, if he bothers you, let me or Goody Ames know. One of us will make sure the captain doesn’t come round again.”
“Thank you, dear.” I waved at the woman and continued on my way.
Mistress Reeves was waiting at the apothecary door when I got home. She was wringing her hands and when she spoke to me her voice shook ever so slightly.
“It’s Arthur, Sarah. He’s sick. He can’t move, can’t eat, can’t speak. What do you have that will help him? And what do you have that might prevent the rest of us from getting it?”
Mistress followed me as I hurried to the back of the apothecary where I kept the jars and bottles of liquids and powders that might be useful in such a situation. I tried not to think about Pappa, about his fever and the things I tried that didn’t work to save him. No, I repeated to myself. I cannot let another person die.