What terrible things happen to people in books. I’m sorry. All I want—all any of us want—is for all these nice people in the stories we read to stop being chased, shot at, electrocuted, taken prisoner, dropped from cliffs, tied to train tracks, locked in caves, gnawed on by griffins, and plunged into the sea.
But we want a good story even more. So just as soon as they settle down, put their feet up, and start to play a slow, quiet game of cards, here we are again—the author and the readers—sneaking up through the bushes to peer in the window, knowing that at any moment some mobsters will bust in, or centipedes will come out of the walls, or the Christmas tree will start whapping people with its branches and ornaments.
Things, for example, are not going great for people in this story. While off in the black-and-purple clouds of the Horsehead Nebula, Jasper Dash was waiting for his electrocution and Katie and Lily were fighting just to take a breath, Jasper’s mom—who was also fighting for breath, after her sprint—was surrounded by aliens in the frozen winter forest.
The aliens were tall and gangly and goggly. They had ray guns.
Mrs. Dash said, “I demand to know what you want, gentlemen.”
One of the aliens stepped forward. He held up his ray gun. He said in a growly voice, “Are you Jasper Dash?”
“No,” said Mrs. Dash. “Jasper is my son. And right now, he’s a very naughty boy.”
“We have come for Jasper Dash.”
“Well, boys, you’re out of luck, because my son has gone gallivanting off to the region of the Horsehead Nebula.”
The lead alien rocked backward. “The Horsehead Nebula? Then he has already perfected the teleportation machine?”
“You’re right he has,” said Mrs. Dash. “And when he gets back, he is going to be grounded for a good long time. Those trees’ll be green again before that boy gets his shrink-ray privileges back. Why do you want him? Who are you?”
“We have come from the planet of Krilm.”
“I haven’t had the pleasure,” said Mrs. Dash. “Anyway, you’ll never catch my Jasper! He’s far, far away.”
“We are not trying to catch Jasper Dash. We are trying to warn him.”
“Warn him?” repeated Mrs. Dash.
The alien explained, “He has walked into a trap. And because he used that teleporter, the whole of the Earth is in peril.”