Chapter Six

 

 

…waiting for the right one…

 

Friday night, Fitzwilliam picked up Elizabeth for dinner at his house while Charles dined with Jane at the Bennett townhouse on Elm Street. After dinner, he escorted Elizabeth to the library for her Greek lesson where he checked the last assignment he had given her, and finding it satisfactory, he went on to the next lesson. They worked through the next chapter until he was satisfied that she had grasped the concept, and then he gave her another assignment.

Closing the book and putting everything away, Fitzwilliam turned to Elizabeth with a smile. “Now let’s have some wine and relax.” Rising from the table, he went to his study and returned with a decanter of port.

“Elizabeth, we’ve dated for nearly four weeks and discussed many things, but I still don’t know much about you. Why don’t you tell me about your parents, your siblings? I want to learn something of your history—what influenced you, what you did as a child, what were your favorite toys, games, any pets you may have had. Tell me about your horses. I believe you ride. I want to know everything about you.” He poured the wine and handed her a glass, then he took a seat at the opposite end of the sofa, facing her.

“Well, I don’t really know where to begin. You’ve asked a lot. But I’ll try my best to tell you what you want to know.” She paused for a sip of wine. “I think we were like any other family. Mom stayed home when we were little. She baked and cooked and was just always there. She read to us, and we all sang songs together. That’s one of the ways we learned to appreciate both music and reading. Then, when Mom needed a break, she would set us all down to watch Public Broadcasting—you know, Sesame Street, Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood, Shining Time Station. She wanted us to have fun, but she was always looking for educational programs for us as opposed to junk food TV, though we were allowed to watch some of that too—just not a steady diet of it. My favorite show was My Little Pony. To this day I still love to watch it,” Elizabeth said with a soft laugh.

“As for toys, the girls had baby dolls and the boys had trains and little toy cars. Cherry Merry Muffin and Strawberry Shortcake were some my favorite little dolls, but I also had an American Girl Samantha doll and a Bitty Baby that I loved.” She smiled at the memory. “I remember when Kat was born. I carried my Bitty Baby everywhere, pretending that I had a baby too while Mom took care of my baby sister. I even pretended to nurse.”

Darcy’s lips curled while thinking about the Bennett children playing in front of the TV, the girls with their dolls and the boys with trains and little toy cars much like he and David had done. “So you were the nurturing type when you were little.”

“To some extent. I wanted to be just like my mom when I was little. She taught math at this university, too. Later, though, I wanted to be like Dad. I didn’t think it was fair that he spent so much time with the boys, teaching them about the farm, so eventually he let me tag along. I learned a great deal about managing a farm, and I suppose it’s a good thing now with Joseph overseas.”

“Managing a farm or an estate can be very fulfilling,” Darcy said, thinking of how much he would have liked to have done just as she had described. Once more he felt the sting of his father’s controlling personality, wishing he had been like Mr. Bennett.

“Indeed it is. I think I’ll always want to live on a farm. I could never be truly happy on a city lot, stuck in town.” She shook her head.

…Nor I, Elizabeth…Nor I.

“Now where was I? Oh yes! Mother would make us cute little dresses, and she would always make one to match for our dolls—especially for my Samantha doll which was my favorite. She smocked and did French hand sewing. We had beautiful clothes. Mom sewed, crocheted, tatted lace, and embroidered as well as many other things. She taught all her girls to do likewise. And soon Jane, Mary Beth and I, and later Kat, were making our own doll clothes. Eventually, we even made our own clothes. Mom taught us to design our wardrobes to suit our individual taste.”

“I bet you were very cute.” Darcy chuckled.

“Well, I don’t know about that.”

“Ah, but I believe you were…and still are. Now, carry on. I’m anxious to hear more. Tell me about your dad. What was he like?”

“Dad was special.” She nodded as she took a sip of wine. “He was as kind and good as a man could be. Every night he would read to us. He started with simple things such as children’s stories, Little Golden Books. Then, as we grew older, he progressed to The Brothers Grimm and Hans Christian Anderson. Those two are still among my favorites to this very day. He read to us from a series by Walter Fraley about horses, too. That was where my love affair with the horse first began. Dad read all of Charles Dickens and Mark Twain to us, as well as many other selections from the classics. He did this until we could read for ourselves, and then continued it at bedtime.” She smiled with a twinkle in her eyes. “This opened the world to me, and I became an avid reader. I truly loved to learn and was often found with a book in my hand.”

…You’re very fortunate. I would like to have had a family like yours. I’m sure you’ll make a wonderful mother someday. I hope I’ll make a good father. Maybe someday you and I will have a family together.

“How were you educated?” Darcy asked. “You seem to have had an unusual background.”

She chuckled. “We were educated at home, but as we grew older, my father hired tutors to teach us Latin, Greek, Spanish, French, and piano, and the girls all took classical ballet, jazz, and ballroom dancing. Mary Beth excelled and was accepted to The American School of Ballet.”

…Interesting.

“My younger brother, Joseph, excelled in karate and academics. He was so far ahead of most children that he graduated from high school when he was sixteen and attended this university for one year before he was accepted into the Naval Academy at seventeen.” She paused for a sip of wine.

“Now, as to me personally, I was an outdoors type. It was a punishment for me to be kept inside, even in the winter. I would climb trees and hang upside down, which would upset Grandmother Barnett, my mother’s mother, to no end, as she would always tell me I would turn my liver over, or that it was disgraceful for a young lady to climb trees. I was a tomboy.”

Darcy laughed. “A real hoyden.”

“Yes, I suppose so. Much to my grandmother’s chagrin.”

Darcy shook his head and laughed at the thought of a little girl hanging upside down in a tree. “I loved to play outdoors as a child, too. We would have made good playmates. Continue on. I’m enjoying this,” he said.

She slipped off her shoes and curled her feet firmly underneath her as she lifted her glass to her lips. “Well, let’s see, what else is there? Oh yes, hounds. My father always kept hounds. We had Black and Tans, Walkers, Redbones, and Bloodhounds. When I was sixteen, my father gave me a pair of Black and Tans, which became my pride and joy. I raised them from pups, and we became inseparable until I left for school.”

…Hounds! I like hounds… Better and better. You and I complement one another in that regard.

He nodded as he raised his glass.

“I was also very boisterous. I remember a time when Joseph and I played a prank on Kat. I was ten, Joseph was nine, and Kat was four—well, nearly five, actually. She was dressed in one of her pretty smocked frocks that Mom had made for her. Peach colored, I do believe. It was the Fourth of July, and we were going to have company over for our annual ice cream social and fireworks celebration. It’s a very grand affair for our family with all of the aunts, uncles, and cousins coming together for the fun.”

“Charles told me all about your last get-together. I wish I had foregone my business meeting.” …She grew up in such a close family! My mother would’ve wanted our lives to have been similar, but Father was rarely there for us.

“Yes, you should have. We would have met a whole month sooner! And then you could have met my family along with Charles. Anyway, where was I? I seem to have lost track.”

“Something concerning Kat, I believe.” He sipped his wine as he listened.

“Oh yes, I remember now. Kat had been especially annoying that day. Mom and Dad had tasked us with keeping her entertained. She followed us everywhere, constantly reporting back everything we did, getting us into all sorts of trouble—all because of her tattling. So, we formed a plan for revenge.”

“Oh, no! What did you do?”

She snickered. “We convinced Kat to stand very still with her eyes closed near a very large and fresh cow-pile in the barnyard. I asked her to count to twenty, since that was as far as she could count at the time. I told her to wait for a very special surprise that Joseph and I had planned just for her. She was so trusting…she never suspected a thing!”

Darcy rolled his eyes and grinned, nodding for her to continue as he took another sip of wine.

“We were very naughty, I’m afraid. While Kat counted, we placed firecrackers in the pile and lit them. Then we stood back to watch. When it exploded, Kat was covered from head to toe. Bursting into tears, she ran into the kitchen crying and dripping slimy green manure all over Mom’s nice clean floor. Kat’s dress was ruined.” Elizabeth chuckled. “That day Joseph and I got the worst spanking either of us had ever had, but I got the worst of it because Daddy said I was older and obviously the ringleader. My father never spanked us much, but that one was memorable. Daddy also made me stay inside for the rest of the day with no ice cream and no more fireworks. I had to clean the kitchen floor, too. And Joseph lost his pony privileges.”

Darcy shouted with laughter. “Elizabeth, she was a baby—only four years old. That was terrible of you!”

“Well, she was almost five! But you’re right. It was terrible. The worst part of it, though, was when we realized what we had done. We were both scared to death, and with good reason, too. We knew we were going to get it as my father would say. We never intended it to be the big mess that it was. I kept telling Joseph that three firecrackers were enough, but did he listen to me? No! He used the entire pack!”

“You, Miss Bennett, deserved exactly what you got, and I have no sympathy for you. I would have also smacked your bum, too, had you been my daughter. That was a very wicked thing to do, but to be fair, my brother and I have played our fair share of pranks. Although I don’t believe we ever covered anyone in cow manure. I can’t believe how rambunctious you were—you were awful. A little terror! I’m glad I didn’t know you back then. I wouldn’t have wanted to be on the receiving end of your revenge then or now,” Darcy said, wiping tears of laughter from his eyes.

“Well, I’ve grown up since then. And I hope I have learned to behave a little better. But Daddy always told me that payback is hell and that someday I will have a little girl just like me. Although, I surely hope not. According to him, Joseph and I were just like him. He often told us we were his penance for all he had done as a child, while Mom said it wasn’t fair that she should have to suffer for his sins.”

“Well, Miss Bennett, I hope that fate never befalls you or the poor man who marries you. I’m siding with your mother in this instance. However, I must tell you it sounds like there was never a dull moment in your home. I pity your poor parents!”

“No, there was never a dull moment. I can assure you of that. But the rest of my siblings were not like me and Joseph. Jane has always been sweet and kind. She’s like Momma, and Mary Beth is like my Grandmother Bennett—refined and always insistent on being proper and ladylike. Kat is a less refined version of me, although more cautious, while Daniel is shy and very reserved. He loves to draw and wants to be a civil engineer. He’ll do it, too. We all have a way of determining our future through hard work and sheer force of will. The Bennetts have always been known for that.”

“Elizabeth, your family sounds utterly fascinating. I feel as if I’m getting to know them through you. Now tell me about your first horse. What horses do you have now?”

“Well, when I was eleven, Dad bought me my first horse. He was a bluish grey quarter horse gelding named Buck. I learned to ride on him, and I have loved riding ever since. Today we have four mares and two stallions—a black Arabian and a white Lipizzan. Our black stallion, however, is very difficult to handle, and for that reason I don’t ride him. Only Joseph and my father have ever ridden him, but hopefully this spring I can work with him and tame him some. He’s very spirited, whereas the white stallion is gentle and easy to manage.”

His curiosity piqued with this knowledge. Horses were one of his passions. “Elizabeth, Lipizzans are amazing jumpers and climbers, but your Arabian fascinates me more. I would like to see him. I’ve ridden all my life, and I like spirited animals very much.” …Spirited women, too.

“Well, you can try when you come to Longbourn tomorrow. He’s quite a handful.”

“I’ll look forward to it. Now tell me more about your parents. I wish I could have met them.”

She dropped her gaze for a split second. “My parents were two of the best people I’ve ever known, and I miss them dearly. There was never a question that they loved us all unconditionally, even when we disappointed them, like I did when I played that trick on Kat. Mom and Dad were also very much in love. Dad always treated Mom with the utmost of respect. His family was the most important thing in his life, and Mom and his children were always first. We were his world. And Mom was always there whenever I needed to talk. She may not have had the answers, but she always had a cup of hot tea and a listening ear. That’s why I miss them so terribly. Mom and Dad could make anything better.” She suppressed a sob.

“They were killed in a car wreck nearly three years ago. It was a cold, snowy day and they were trying to make it back to the farm before a winter storm set in. They didn’t make the curve on County Road 52. Their car jumped the guardrail and tumbled into the ravine below. The state trooper said they were both killed instantly.”

Tears filled her eyes.

“Oh, Elizabeth, I’m so sorry. Please don’t cry. Someday you’ll have a husband and a family like your parents did,” he said as he put his glass aside and slid over to comfort her. “You were truly blessed because not all children have what you had. To know about your childhood helps me to understand you better,” Darcy said as he continued to hold and comfort her.

When she’d calmed, she glanced up. “Yes, I was lucky to have had them. But enough about me. I want to hear about your childhood.”

“Well, it was not as nice as yours in some ways, but it wasn’t bad either,” he said as he guided her to where he had been sitting. Leaning back, he pulled her onto his chest and held her close. “I have one brother, David, who is four years my junior, and one sister, Georgiana, who is ten years younger. My mum and dad were not as close as yours. Mum did stay home with us, but my father was rarely there. He was consumed with business, and my mother was often lonely. But she did take an interest in David and me, and later in Georgiana. She taught us to ride and play classical piano. She was a master pianist, educated at Cambridge and later at the Royal Academy of Music. For a short while, we were educated at home, too. Mum organized it, but we were taught by special tutors. Then, when we were old enough, David and I were sent to public school and later to Eton. It’s a boarding school of the highest quality. My parents felt very strongly about the educational process.” He released a sigh and gathered her closer, planting a kiss on her brow.

“I would say that whilst Mother was alive we were content and even happy, especially when Father came home from London to spend time with us. However, Mum died from complications of a fourth pregnancy when Georgiana was four,” he said, sadness resonating in his voice. “The baby, my brother, didn’t survive the birth. From that point on, I only remember being lonely. My father was very busy and could rarely spend time with us.”

Elizabeth listened quietly, letting him speak.

“Father spent more time with me than David since I’m his heir, but David never appeared to resent it. When Dad was home, he loved to ride as much as I did, so we often rode together. And when at home from school, David and I would ride everywhere on our country estate as often as we could. I would say we were pretty much like other boys, getting into mischief and playing pranks,” Darcy said as he gently rubbed her back and planted a kiss in her hair. “We were taught by our parents to be well-mannered, with all the skills of an English gentleman. Father feels it’s very important to be able to handle yourself in society, and so we do. I would say that we were both confident boys. We knew we were loved, even if Father didn’t have time to spend with us.

“Georgiana, on the other hand, spent very little time with us since she was so much younger. She stayed in the care of her au pair until she was sent to boarding school. The only time we saw each other as a family was when we were all home for the summer or on holiday. It’s sad, really, because I know we should have been closer to her, but circumstances prevented it. However, we are much closer today, and David and I both feel very protective of her.”

Elizabeth stroked his arm, and he spoke as he looked down at her.

“Like you, I grew to love books and read as much as I could. I was never alone when I was lost in a book.” He laughed softly. “David was more outgoing than me and always enjoyed himself wherever he was. David is very successful in business and helps our father. He’s a good man, but he’s somewhat of a playboy. He says he will never marry.” Darcy sighed. “Father is quite upset with him right now because David likes to date women whom Father feels are potential embarrassments. You see,” he paused to snuggle Elizabeth a little closer, “Father is of the old school. He wants his sons to marry what he considers good women. Models and actresses don’t qualify in his book, and those are the women David dates.”

She turned her head on his shoulder and glanced up at him. “Hmm…I wonder what he would think of me, William.”

Elizabeth watched him closely as he appeared to choose his words with great care.

“If he took the time to get to know you, as I have, he would love you. After all, you’re not an actress or model.” He chuckled.

She gazed at him and breathed deeply as she filed away his words, wondering what he was not telling her, or rather what he was telling her with carefully chosen words. She had a feeling that Mr. Darcy would not like her or even care to get to know her. She wondered what type of family the Darcys really were.

They sat quietly for a time, just holding one another. Then William sat them upright and reached back to release her hair from the clip, allowing it to tumble down over her shoulders in a cascading blanket. “That’s enough talk for now, Liz. Have I told you how much I love your hair?” he asked, breathing in the scent of her long tresses as he ran his fingers through them, planting gentle kisses here and there. “It smells so lovely, like roses.”

“It’s the rose-scented hair oil my mother taught us to make.” She sighed, snuggling into his chest.

“Hmm…well, I like it very much,” he said softly, moving from her hair, planting kisses down her temple before catching her lips, initiating a soft, gentle kiss. With his tongue, he teased her lips, gently parting them. His mouth moved over hers, his tongue slipping in and out in a slow, sensuous kiss. When a soft moan escaped her throat, he leaned in and pressed even deeper, tasting… exploring… coaxing. The sensation rocked her as she shivered in anticipation.

If she thought their first kiss had been pleasurable, this one overwhelmed her. Her pulse raced as her heart pounded. She felt as if she couldn’t breathe—that she would faint at any moment. His tongue delved into her mouth as his kiss deepened, growing more passionate. Leaving her lips, he trailed wet, lingering kisses along her jawline to her ear, nibbling and suckling. His warm breath in her ear sent shivers down her back. He then slowly trailed down the curve of her neck to her throat and back up the same path, catching her mouth once again.

Elizabeth didn’t know a kiss could make her feel like this—as though her blood had been set on fire. All thought of anything, except him, slowly drained away. Her entire body softened against his as a small tremor coursed through her, leaving her shocked with the feelings he invoked. She whispered against his lips, “Nice men don’t kiss like this.”

“Yes… Elizabeth…yes, they do. I’m a nice man,” he murmured as his mouth closed in on hers once more, kissing her repeatedly, each time more deeply, pulling her into him, tightening their embrace.

When they finally broke apart, he pulled back to gaze into her shimmering eyes ablaze with passion. “You’re so beautiful…so very beautiful. Liz, I want you.”

He dipped his head once again and caught her lips while his hand slipped under her sweater and cupped her breast in a gentle caress. As his firm body pressed against her, she felt something she had never experienced before—hot desire. And although her body urged her on, telling her yes, her rational mind screamed no. She was not ready. She was scared.

“William, we have to stop. I’ve never…I don’t…I…”

He pulled back, his brow wrinkled, his eyes questioning.

“Elizabeth, what are you trying to tell me?” he asked tenderly, looking at her in wonder. “Have you never been with a man before?”

“No,” she whispered softly, dropping her gaze, flushed with embarrassment.

His fingers curled beneath her chin, tipping it to catch her eyes. “Never?”

“No, I was…well…that is… I am… I’m saving myself… for the right one… for marriage.” She hesitated, trailing off into an almost inaudible whisper.

He smiled and seemed to be pleasantly surprised. “Then consider yourself saved.” He laughed slightly, hugging her tightly to his chest in a tender embrace. “I didn’t know virgins existed past secondary school. Elizabeth, you’re truly a remarkable woman, and I admire and respect you for it.”

“Then you’re not disappointed in me?” she asked, greatly relieved.

“No, Elizabeth, in fact, I’m actually rather pleased. I’m an old-fashioned gentleman, and you’re clearly an old-fashioned lady. I’m simply surprised!” He chuckled softly. “As you can probably tell, it is not the same with me. I am a little more experienced, but believe it or not, getting you into bed is not my primary objective,” he said. “Elizabeth, I want more than just a physical relationship with you. That’s why I didn’t kiss you until a few days ago. I wanted us to get to know one another, to develop feelings.” He cupped her face in his hand, stroking her high cheekbone with his thumb. “I’m in no hurry, and my intentions are honorable. I’ve never trifled with anyone. I’m looking for a long-term relationship, not a short-term affair. Today, people pop in and out of bed on first acquaintance, without taking the trouble to get to know one another. That’s a recipe for disaster. I want more than that, and now that I know you do, too, I’m very pleased. We’ll take our time.”

He pulled them up to a sitting position. A large smile lightened his features. Taking her hands in his, he said, “We’ll have to slow down. I don't want to do anything that you don’t want to do, and I’ll never take from you what you’re not willing to freely give. I’m a man of strong convictions. Now that I know where you stand, I can accept that. I want you, Elizabeth, but on your terms. I’m willing to wait.”

Elizabeth released a hesitant breath. “I don’t know what to say, since you know what my terms are, but I think I can read between the lines. You say we are both old-fashioned. I suppose that means this is essentially an old-fashioned courtship like people once did. I can accept that. It means that if all goes well, and we fall in love, then you’ll want to marry me.”

“How very perceptive of you because, essentially, yes, that is exactly what I’m saying. Now, if you don’t mind, tell me how such a beautiful and intelligent young woman like yourself has not already been in love, or have you?”

She blushed and briefly dropped her gaze. “I’ve never been in love. As I said, I have been waiting for the right man to come along. I dated one boy from the ballet studio when I was seventeen, but there was nothing there. When I was in college, I dated some, but mostly I was too busy, and the men were too immature. None that I met were interested in getting to know me, or to have an intelligent conversation. I want to be loved for the person I am, not to be somebody’s good time at my expense. I think you know what they wanted,” she said. “I preferred my studies.”

“In other words, you preferred math problems to sex.” He smiled tenderly, stroking the side of her face with the back of his hand.

“I guess that’s one way of putting it,” she softly said.

“Elizabeth, that’s very admirable of you. I, too, want to be loved for the man I am and not for what I have or what my position is. I think we have a lot in common.”

“Perhaps. We’ll see,” she said, relaxing in a contented hug.

They sat on the sofa and held each other for a little while longer, kissing, but this time with restraint. When Charles came home, Darcy drove Elizabeth to her house. Tomorrow they would spend the weekend at Longbourn where he would meet her family and become familiar with the place where she grew up.

When he came home and prepared for bed that night, he thought about what had transpired between them. No other man had touched her. He would be her first and hopefully her last. She was fresh, unspoilt…a virgin, clearly different from most women, but in many ways, Elizabeth was just like him. She complemented him like no other, and he was sure he was falling in love with her.

As he lay there thinking about them and the future, Darcy thought back to Elizabeth’s question earlier that evening about his father. No, his father wouldn’t like her. She was an American and not from the upper stratum of society. This would be a problem he would have to work out. He would enlist David’s help because, if things progressed as he believed they would, he intended to marry Miss Elizabeth Bennett. …if it’s the last thing I do, I will … Sleep would be difficult tonight.