I thought I could handle seeing Amber again, but that was before I saw her. I’d forgotten how she makes me feel—like that time when I was a kid and I got my finger between a plug and a socket. For a second, my whole body tingles, helplessly.
“Jack!” she purrs, managing somehow to insert her body between mine and Talia’s before I can move, much less speak. “You’re here.”
“Hey, Amber,” I manage, backing away a step. Not easy. “Nice…um…bathing suit.” Act cool. Don’t drool.
“You like it?” She steps even closer.
I laugh. “Looks like you found it in the Barbie section at Toys ‘R’ Us.” Duh.
“Is that a complaint?” Amber slides her hand down my arm, pausing an instant to caress the muscles, and for a second, it’s pretty easy to forget that she dumped me—at a party just like this one, in front of all my friends—because someone with a cooler car came along.
“It’s nice,” I say.
Beside me, Talia clears her throat, reminding me of her existence. I’m glad Talia’s here. She’s so beautiful that Amber will know I’m not just sitting around waiting for her…even though I kind of am.
“Hey, Amber, this is Talia.”
Amber pretend-frowns, then reaches her hand out like she’s going to shake Talia’s hand. When Talia puts out her own hand, Amber places an empty can in it. “Would you mind getting me a refill?”
I find my voice. “Amber, she’s not going to just wait on—”
“I mean, if you were going to get yourself one, too.”
Talia looks bewildered but drains her beer. “I suppose I am a bit thirsty.”
“Thanks.” Amber gives her a big, fake smile.
Talia heads for the cooler, and I face Amber. “That wasn’t nice.”
Amber laughs. “So I’m supposed to be nice?”
I glance after Talia. Talia’s nice. At least, she’s interested in other people. I look back at Amber. “Some people are.”
“Do you want someone nice or someone fun?” Amber’s nails are out, scratching my back where I didn’t even know I had an itch. They’re long and red, and part of me wants to turn on her and scream, “Go away, witch!” The other part wants to roll over like a puppy, enjoying it.
“I can’t have both?” I ask.
Amber moves closer. “I’ll try to be nice.” She scratches harder, and I can feel her leg against mine. She leans toward my ear. “I missed you, Jack.”
“Did you?” I stop looking for Talia. It’s not like we’re on a date, after all. She’s just staying with us. And she knew Amber would be here.
“Uh-huh. You knew I would.”
“I didn’t know that. You broke up with me. You made out with some other guy before you broke up with me.”
“Are you still mad about that?” Amber says.
“Still? It just happened.”
“Silly! It was a whole month ago.” She leans in close, so I can feel her breath against my neck, and scratches harder, until I wonder if I might begin to bleed. If I bleed to death, will she even care? “Look, I was wrong, okay? But you were going away for half the summer, and I was going to be so lonely. I didn’t want to get stuck hanging around here, dateless and desperate, while you gallivanted around Europe, making out with French chicks.”
“So you made out with that other guy because you were going to be lonely?” I say.
“You were leaving. I couldn’t stand to think how much I’d miss you.” She leans up against me, so warm. “Hey, I called your cell the other day. That shows I was thinking about you, right?”
“I guess.” She’s totally lying, and I’m totally letting her. The other guy probably left town, and she wants me because I’m here now.
I remember when I stuck my finger in that socket, my dad yelled at me for being stupid. And that’s how I feel around Amber. Stupid. The girl makes me stupid.
“How about if I apologized?” She stops scratching and puts both hands on my shoulders.
“That would be a good—”
I don’t get to finish because her mouth interrupts me. Like, it’s on top of my mouth, rendering me unable to speak.
I’d forgotten how she kissed, too.
When she’s finally finished, she says, “Do you accept my apology?”
I know what I should say. No. Absolutely not. I’ve moved on. I’m here with Talia, and being here with someone means something to me, even if it doesn’t mean anything to you.
Instead, I say, “Uh…”
She kisses me again, her long fingernails in my hair now, and I am fire and water, and Talia was three hundred years ago, or a thousand. Amber is now.
“I missed you, Jack,” she says.
Did she really? I want to believe that. It feels good to hear her say it, anyway.
“God, I missed you, too,” I say.
We stand there, making out, until someone tells us to get a room. Amber says, “We could go someplace. Are your parents home tonight?”
Which is when I remember. Talia. What am I doing?
She went to get the beer, and she never came back.
“I should find Talia,” I tell Amber.
“Don’t worry about her,” Amber says. “I’m sure she’ll find her way home.”
Home. I laugh. “You don’t understand about Talia. She’s…she could have gotten lost or something.”
“What is she, stupid?”
“No. She’s not stupid. She’s…nice…innocent.” I remember Talia surfing on the air mattress, talking to my sister, asking me about gardening. Amber never asked me about stuff like that because, I now realize, she didn’t care. I could never talk to Amber the way I talk to Talia. She’d laugh at me.
She laughs now. “Innocent? She was here ten minutes ago, and then…she went off with Robert Hernandez.”
“With Robert?”
Amber rolls her eyes. “She won’t be innocent for long.”
Ten minutes ago. I calculate. That means she showed up with the beers, saw Amber putting her tongue down my throat, and stormed away, only to fall into the clutches of the biggest player in school. He’ll probably try and take her to a bedroom or…something.
I pull away from Amber. “I brought her here. She’s my responsibility.” I stand on my toes, trying to see through the crowd.
Amber looks annoyed and stomps her foot. “So you’re going to look for her instead of being with me?”
“I have to.”
“But she went off with someone else. Face it, Jack. There’s just something about you that makes girls want to make out with other guys.”
I turn back toward Amber. “What did you just say?”
“I didn’t mean it that way. I was kidding.”
“Funny.” I laugh. “You just think I’m some loser, don’t you?”
She shrugs, but then she says, “Of course not, baby. You’re just being silly. She probably went home with Robert.”
“Yeah, that’s what I’m afraid of,” I say. I turn my back on her and start looking through the crowd.
“You’re not going to get another chance with me, Jack!” Amber yells.
“I don’t want one!” It’s hard for me to say that. I know it’s not about me with her. It’s about the conquest, about winning, about proving to everyone that she can get me back anytime. And yet part of me really wants to touch her some more, wants her to be as into me as I am into her. “I’m tired of being stupid around you.”
Then I hear a scream.