Foreword
I first met Harry when he was 13 years old. It was like visiting a different country: one with an unfamiliar culture, different ways of communicating; a place that made me hypervigilant because I never knew what was going to happen next. At first, I aimed to get Harry to come more into my familiar world – for his own good as well as mine. I thought it would make life easier for him, but it didn’t.
Harry liked skiing. So, I just couldn’t understand why he wasn’t eager to set off on time. Instead he would wind up all the other kids, get them agitated or laughing, so they couldn’t get themselves ready. This included mimicking me and swearing profusely, which the younger ones copied.
Every day I thought about how to connect with Harry. Things improved somewhat – eventually I could glance at him and he would usually settle. But he remained very troubled and full of angst.
At moments I glimpsed Harry’s intelligence, but it wasn’t showing academically. His intelligence would spark in wonderful ways – like when he suggested ‘Freedom to Learn’ on the back of the NatureKids t-shirts, for a charity occasion.
Harry went off to a school but kept in touch. At 16 he declared that he wanted to get his body and brain to work more effectively. He meticulously set about this, but his aim was misunderstood. Others broke his fragile sense of self and his tentative hold on reality.
So, at 18 years old, Harry came back to NatureKids, to find himself. It was a rocky journey for eight months. Gradually he started to eloquently express how he experienced the world, his heightened awareness and profound insights. He enabled me to see the world through his eyes and became my teacher, helping me understand other children and adults on a deeper level.
Now when I talk to Harry, it’s interesting and deeply absorbing, a time to replenish my energy and further my insights. It’s an easy and natural connection, like having a relaxing holiday in my favourite place.
Harry has written this book to further understanding of PDA and help parents and children towards an easy and natural connection.
a teacher and family support counsellor who has worked with children at a grassroots level for many years. She is the founder of NatureKids – a unique centre for small groups of children and young people.