1 Clodia 

                     I used to call her

my Pillar of Salt.

                                I told her

she was like a dog

                            a hell-hound

fed on dry bones.

I put it about that she shat

just ten times a year

                 so dry and so small

she could crumble a turd

                         in her fingers

         without needing to wash.

I said there was no smell

                                 but soap

and an odour of sanctity.

              I said when she died

she would go straight to

heaven

wafted on blasts

               from a Lowry Organ

tuned to exalt.

                        It was all true

more or less.

                         What a bitch!

                    How I loved her!

2 Ode to Emptiness

With its blue crackling paper

two cameras

                       monitor and lights

                          the crew arrives

at the house of Catullus.

Vacuous will follow

in his own good time.

                              A makeup girl

who says she once cut

Caesar’s hair

                          lays out her gear

on the kitchen table

                           and goes to work.

                             The cat decamps.

A neighbour stares from his window.

             He can see an unknown girl

touching the face

of his neighbour the poet.

Made up to look like himself

     Catullus escapes to the bathroom

while they set up shot.

                             In preparation

for the emptiness of the medium

he empties himself.

                         Across the street

meeting demands for silence

tree-cutters have cut

         their chainsaws and shredder

for the any-moment-now

              when Vacuous will begin

‘Since we last spoke

                       on this programme

Catullus …’

3 The Invitation

           She was right of course –

half right.

            The gods had given you

a silver tongue

but a damaged heart.

You should have answered my call

Hemi.

                       Talking to Catullus

would not have launched you

so early into the dark.

4 Honoris Causa

                                 Cornificius

        whose ‘mighty pohutukawa’

tower over the suburb

    earns praise for his stout defence

of the native flora.

                            This is one honour

he might have had to forego

if their shadow condemned his house

to damp and darkness in winter.

                      Since it falls however

exclusively on his neighbours

                         he is able to enjoy

                            the acclamation

with a clear conscience.

5 Dogs I (Society of Authors)

Calvus of miniscule talent

makes friends with all

                     the neighbourhood dogs

                                – it’s his policy

to become one of them –

one of the boys.

                  Some are easy

they wag and roll over.

                 Others snarl

     and bare their teeth –

he has to work on them

crouching

            not meeting the eye

pushing forward a vulnerable hand

            as if it were a snout.

Does he offer his arse for sniffing

when there’s no one about –

his balls for licking?

          Why do you want so much

Calvus

             to be loved by the whole

canine community?

6 Dogs II (Calvus replies)

Jealous Catullus

                   with his two mangy cats

and his thwarted love

                         for a famous bitch

sees me two days in succession

             on my haunches in the street

                    talking to a nervous dog

and down it goes in his notebook –

          image of a man hungry for love!

No I don’t think they’re human

                           or that I’m a dog

                      but isn’t there a kind

of planetary kinship –

       all of us in the same lovely boat

         under the same harsh sentence?

                           Give over Catullus

               stop playing the lone wolf.

Living’s our only offence.

We do it together.

7 Soror, Aue atque Uale

In the refectory

Quintilia

                  in squares and gardens

once in the London Library

                               often in Soho

over dim sims

and duckling in ginger

                  Catullus heard it all –

your griefs, your dislikes

even sometimes your envies –

                    listened moreover

(and with what pleasure!)

                     as you recounted

twist upon turn of invention

to the unfolding

of your latest fable.

                            Best of luck then

                                        Quintilia

enjoy your hour and your day.

                                        Catullus

                            wishing you well

                        grants you for ever

this small corner

in a sacred place.

8 Like

Young poets before us

Licinius

                       had done as we did

all those years ago

                          working together

finding words in wine

                        wit in one another

                             a clever rhyme

a metaphor

the mot juste.

I remember walking home

too late for the trams

                        too poor for a taxi

                         holes in my shoes

letting in water

thinking what a marvellous

meal

              words made of the world

of the real.

                            It was like love

                                       like war

like nothing else –

like poetry.

9 Si quicquam cupido optantique …

                          Longed for so long

no longer expected

look! – you’re back

                              rarer than gold

than hen’s teeth

whom I in my need

                                           denied

                                          derided.

                             More mysterious

Muse

                                  in your return

than ever in your absence

see what you’ve done –

                      a notebook almost full

poem after draft of poem!

                                      Here to stay

                              or gone tomorrow

Clodia

what can I do

                               but bow the knee

                       what can I say

but welcome!