Five Months Later
Gerome watched as Sam and Alex exchanged their vows. They both radiated a nearly touchable love and happiness. For days, they’d been nervous and excited at the same time, but now, they both stood in front of the king, declaring their love to the world.
Angela, the little princess, sat on Gerome’s arm while smiling and laughing at everyone. She conquered everyone’s heart with just a single giggle.
The short and simple ceremony nearly brought tears to Gerome’s eyes with its beauty. He managed to keep them down, but it didn’t stop him from silently wishing for the same thing. On the outside, he wore a smile, but his heart ached. He’d never have this.
Soon, the guests were all laughing, eating, and celebrating the marriage of Alex and Sam. All the trackers who’d helped rescue Alex were there, along with the king and queen. Alex even made sure to invite Ash and Josh. Ash still appeared haunted and thin, but according to D, he was improving. He just needed time and someone who cared for him, a job Josh and D seemed to be doing very well.
During the rescue, he hadn’t approved of Alex’s insistence on bringing Ash with them and endangering everyone, even himself. But when D and Alex told him a little bit about Ash’s past, Gerome understood why D went back and rescued him. The tough tracker couldn’t let anyone suffer, even if he put himself in danger. Back then, they didn’t know about Elder Adali’s capture or death in the aftermath of the kidnapping. Ash would’ve been free now anyway, but leaving him behind when D rescued Alex might have destroyed Ash.
Now Ash was free and on his way to a life of his own.
If only he could have the same—a life without a mate. During the past months, he’d more or less managed to ignore Luis. Some days when he worked enough, he completely forgot about him.
After their fight and Luis’ escape to the guest bedroom, they hadn’t spoken. Not once. At first, Gerome hadn’t minded much. He enjoyed the relief from the reminder of the mating. After a while, though, he had knocked on Luis’ door in the hopes of the man opening it and talking to him, but he’d either been asleep or ignoring him. It suited him just as well when his mate didn’t want anything to do with him. He’d done his best to ignore him as well.
They were mated, so his father was satisfied. What else happened between them wasn’t the king’s business.
Luis now sat next to him. Even though he ate, he’d lost more weight. Gerome instructed his butlers, including the new one he’d chosen to replace Allen, to bring Luis food and check on him at the same time.
Other than that, everyone left his mate alone. He’d come around—or not. They could live together alone like this until they died. Nothing really to look forward to, but Gerome couldn’t bring himself to care much anymore. He’d given up. If Luis wouldn’t even talk to him, what else could he do?
Gerome glanced over to the man in question, absently noting his sunken cheeks. His eyes met Luis’, and he quickly averted his gaze. Had the man been watching him? Why?
He shifted Angela on his arm and looked at his mate again who had turned away, his gaze fixing on Sam and Alex as they danced together closely.
Gerome used the opportunity to scrutinize Luis’ face a bit more. Luis didn’t look good. His hair had grown out, and he wore it combed back in a visible attempt to style it, but he clearly needed a haircut. Not only did his cheekbones protrude, but also his whole face looked more skeletal since their dinner with the king and queen. Dark circles under his eyes spoke of a lack of sleep or too much worry, and the grayish tone of his skin was most likely due to remaining inside all the time.
The shirt he wore highlighted how thin he’d gotten despite the food the butlers brought him. His shoulders stood out, and the fabric clung to him like a rag. He’d thought Luis had looked like shit five months ago. He’d been wrong. Now he looked like shit. Or worse. Damn.
Gerome shifted Angela again. He should have demanded that Luis talk to him. The man was clearly not fine or doing well, and even though Gerome had no feelings for him, he couldn’t let the man suffer. It was wrong.
He just didn’t know what he could change.
The king, a smile on his face, came over to him before he could do anything else. “Can I hold her a bit?” he asked, his eyes already on Angela. Her little fists waving, she beamed up at her granddad.
She’d totally managed to turn the bad-ass king into a soft, smiling grandfather. It was amazing. Gerome had even seen him play hide-and-seek with her.
“Of course.” He handed the little princess over to his father, who instantly started to tickle her. Her bright giggle was audible even over the music.
More couples joined Alex and Sam on the dance floor, and Gerome looked around at all the happy faces. Okay, all but one. Luis’ expression wasn’t happy. He looked like he’d bitten into a lemon—one Gerome had fed him.
Gerome sighed deeply and rubbed a hand over his face. Shit. This was so hard. He didn’t want to have a mate who obviously suffered, but he didn’t know what to do when the man refused to talk to him.
Maybe Sam or Alex could help him understand and tell him how he could make it better. But perhaps, he should simply ask Sam. Alex would probably only yell at him for not noticing sooner that something was wrong or for not talking to his mate for months. Right now, he could kick himself, but that wouldn’t fix the problem.
He cast another glance at Luis who still stared at all the dancing couples. Even Ash slowly turned in D’s arms. They looked good together. Ash clearly had eyes for D only. Apparently, Ash found security in D’s arms, and whether it was as a friend or a lover, the man deserved some good times.
“Come on, let’s dance.” Gerome tore his gaze away from Ash and D to see Sam standing in front of him and holding out his hand, a big grin on his face.
Gerome took it and stood. “Of course.”
He followed Sam to the open area and took the slightly smaller man in his arms. Mixing with the other dancers, they swung to the music. Gerome took the lead, with Sam following easily. After a few beats, Gerome bent down to speak in Sam’s ear. “Are you happy? Is this how you wanted it?”
Sam’s radiant smile answered the question. “Of course. I think this is one of the best days of my life. I never imagined things would turn out this perfectly. I couldn’t be happier.”
“That’s great.” Gerome pulled Sam closer into his arms. “You know I wish you and Alex all the happiness in the world?”
“Yes, thank you.” Sam hugged Gerome back without missing a single step. “How are you doing with Luis? You don’t look too cozy.”
Damn, and here he’d thought he’d been able to hide it. “Not good. We don’t speak. I haven’t seen him for several months. All he does is stay in the guestroom.”
Sam leaned back. “What do you mean you haven’t spoken in several months?”
“I haven’t seen him. I’ve knocked twice, but he won’t talk to me. He ignores me completely, and I don’t want to force him to talk to me.”
Sam, his face going hard, stopped in the middle of the dance floor. “You are seriously telling me you haven’t spoken to your mate in six fucking months?” Five, Gerome wanted to say, but Sam took his hand and turned around before he could even utter a word. Without a glance back, he pulled Gerome out of the big room, through the double doors, toward the kitchen. The moment the doors closed, silence surrounded them. Sam didn’t let go of him, though, and pulled him onward. What did he want?
He’d find out soon enough. Sam continued to pull at his arm, leading him away from the celebration. He finally stopped in a hallway where they were alone. He turned back to Gerome, a serious expression still on his face. “So, now slowly for me. You mated Luis. Then you did what?”
“Um... Nothing. I mean, yes, we mated. Then we rescued Alex. And afterward... he ignored me. We ignored each other until we were summoned to have dinner with my parents. I told him he had to attend with me. He did what he was told, but he behaved terribly in the presence of the king. He didn’t pay attention and was rude to my mother. We had a fight afterward, and I yelled at him.” Gerome ran a hand through his hair. The story sounded so cold and unfeeling the way he told it. Like he didn’t care. Like he was an asshole.
“And then?”
“Nothing. Luis ran into his room, and I haven’t spoken to him since. Like I said, he doesn’t open the door. And I just don’t want to go in and demand he talk to me.”
Sam remained silent for a whole minute while Gerome turned the events around in his head and tried to figure out what he could have done differently, but he came up blank.
“Let me get this straight: You have a mate. You don’t love him. Okay, I fully understand you can’t love him. BUT... you fucking didn’t care enough to talk to him? He looks like shit—nothing like the man I met six months ago. Have you stopped one second to think about how he feels? He’s lost everything, and all you do is ignore him and let him stay in his room? How would you feel if someone ripped you away from everything you knew—out of your life to marry you to someone? I think you should count yourself lucky that he’s still alive!”
“But that’s how it’s done in vampire society. I can’t change the laws. I haven’t mistreated him or anything, so he has no reason to hide from me.”
“You will be king and then you can, but that’s beside the point. What I don’t get is why you can’t understand that Luis must be horrified. He’s lost everything. He’s probably depressed as hell. And all you do is ignore him. He needs someone to help him adjust to his new situation, to find a place in all this, not someone who ignores him. You’re his mate, and no matter how you feel about him and the whole thing, you’re in this together. It’s your duty to make it work in some way. Again, I totally understand you. It sucks to be mated against your will. But you’re punishing the wrong person for it. He suffers, probably way more than you do, and he’s lost everything. How would you feel in his shoes? And would it help if your mate yelled at you for misbehaving or ignored you? Have you ever stopped to think about what he might need or how you could help him? You can’t get out of this, but you can both decide how much you suffer.”
Gerome fidgeted. Shit. Sam might be right, but he didn’t understand anything about coven structure? How could he possibly treat Luis differently? “I can’t make amends. He’s the submissive mate. He needs to follow my lead and do what he’s told. Anyone else would have forced him to step up to his role already, no matter how he feels about it.” It sounded stupid, even to his ears, but their society worked this way. Sam needed to understand that.
“You. Are. So. Stupid. I respect you and love you dearly, but you are fucking stupid. I don’t care how it’s done in your society. It doesn’t matter. Don’t you get it? No one cares as long as you don’t talk about it openly. No one needs to know what is going on between you and your mate. Would it kill you to make life a bit easier for him? No, it wouldn’t, but it might change the whole thing between the two of you. Don’t tell me shit about your rules. Don’t tell anyone what happens in your home. Period. And then forget what you were taught about how a mate should behave. You have one, and you have to make it work with him. No one else. You won’t get another chance, Gerome. It’s your move. And as far as I can tell, you’re fucking things up royally right now.” Sam’s eyes gleamed.
“But... but I can’t just...” What did he want to say? Sam’s words hurt and Gerome started to defend his actions, to tell Sam he needed to understand this was not how it worked or how it was supposed to be. He couldn’t appear weak. He couldn’t let Luis have the upper hand. No one would respect him if they found out how soft he really was.
“There is no but. You and Luis are together. Do what is necessary to make it tolerable for both of you. I don’t see any other way. You’re in a relationship, even though you don’t love him. And you’re making yourself and him miserable because you’re stuck with each other. You’re so keen on showing everyone how tough you are that you’re completely ignoring how much you’re hurting yourself and Luis. It’s your choice to make it better. Only yours. Now go, ask him to dance. Try to be nice for once. I know you can be.” Sam smiled, his face softening.
Gerome didn’t feel like smiling. Sam was right. He might have deliberately made Luis miserable. Their society worked based on dominance and submission, and he’d followed their rules.
He started to speak, to explain himself and his actions, tell Sam he was wrong, but he couldn’t. Every sentence that popped in his head sounded hollow. Nothing felt right, except, “You’re right. I think I punished him for being my mate instead of making it easier for him.” Even though he didn’t want to acknowledge it, Sam’s words rang true.
Submissive mates should behave and follow the lead of their owners, but Sam found the breaking point: nobody needed to know what they did behind closed doors. And if Gerome found a way to make life with his mate easier, then he’d do it. Luis shouldn’t suffer. After all, it wasn’t his fault. Society was at blame. Gerome couldn’t fix their laws right now, but he could approach Luis, talk to him, and show him life as the prince’s consort wasn’t so bad.
“What should I do? Ask him to dance? And then what?” How should he proceed after that?
“What and then? You dance with him, and then you show him you like him. Talk to him. Ask him how he’s feeling. Ask him how he’s doing. Heaven, ask him what he’s studied... whatever.”
“I believe he had to quit studying because of our mating.”
Sam, his mouth falling open, stared at Gerome. It took him a couple of tries before he could speak again. “He had to stop studying because of you? And you never, ever stopped to think about letting him go back to uni? What kind of asshole are you? You wonder why he hates your guts? Personally, I would have strangled you in your sleep by now!”
Gerome’s fangs dropped, and he growled low in his throat. What the fuck was wrong with Sam? He wouldn’t let this human call him an asshole, friend or not, and he would put him in place if necessary.
“Put those things back and stop growling. I’m not afraid of you. Tell me, how can you be such an asshole? The man went to uni. He had his studies. And you simply won’t allow him to pick them up? Why the fuck not? Are your mates forbidden to do what they love or like? Is there a reason you try to make your partners miserable?”
“We don’t—” Gerome, suddenly ashamed, retracted his fangs. What had he been thinking?
“You do. Intentionally or not, you do. Go back and ask him to dance or talk. Apologize. Apologize for everything you did and didn’t do. Then ask him what he wants to do. And for heaven’s sake, make it happen. I don’t care what you have to do, but don’t let stupid laws or customs stop you. He deserves better.”
Before Gerome could say anything else, Sam stormed back to the party, leaving him behind. He’d never seen Sam this angry. The man was easy-going, lovely, and nice. It was so un-Sam-like to yell at him, call him an asshole, and tell him to fuck his society’s rules, and Gerome couldn’t wrap his head around it.
What should he do now? Fuck all society rules and make amends with his mate, even though he still didn’t think he’d done much wrong?
He never hurt Luis. He never forced him to do anything. It didn’t sound right that he should apologize. But then, he was the one who had the say in this mating, not Luis. And Luis wouldn’t come and try to make it work. Gerome had waited five months, and nothing had changed. So maybe it was time for him to ignore what he learned and make some changes of his own.
After all, things with Luis couldn’t get any worse.