––––––––
Oh please, prayed Faith as Chris rounded the tree. Please let Molly be there. Her prayer was answered as Chris drew his daughter out for a much-needed cuddle. Faith held onto the rough bark of the tree and waited for her fast-beating heart to slow down. Emotions surged through her. Thankfulness, gratitude, an immense desire to shake Molly for giving her a fright, but a much stronger one to hug her hard because it had been borne into her with the impact of a sledgehammer that the child meant so, so much to her.
She lurched upright, wrapping her arms around both Molly and Chris. ‘We thought you were lost,’ she said. ‘Please don’t ever do that again without telling someone where you’re going.’
Two fat tears trickled down Molly’s face. ‘I only wanted to see Fairy Maple.’
‘Yes, sweetheart, but we didn’t know that and we were worried,’ said Chris.
‘But you were busy and Faith was at her house and ...’ Molly paused. ‘I’m hungry,’ she said, with the air of making a discovery.
‘Good,’ said Faith. ‘Because I have a casserole in the oven just waiting to be eaten.’
‘And I have wine just waiting to be drunk,’ murmured Chris. ‘And boy, do I need it.’ His hand touched Faith’s arm as she stepped back from the group hug. ‘Thank you.’
‘And can Faith stay and do my bath and read me a story?’
Faith looked at Chris. His deep green eyes looked back steadily. ‘She can stay as long as she likes,’ he said.
Did that mean ...?
Faith ducked her head and concentrated on walking back to the bridge without losing her footing again.
Back at home, she stripped off the T-shirt and shorts she’d been wearing all day and had a rapid shower. What to wear now, though? After considering half the contents of her wardrobe, Faith picked loose, dark blue trousers and a light blue silk blouse and laid them on the bed. She pulled open her underwear drawer. Nestling at the back were two sets Hope had brought her last Christmas, so far unworn. Pink lacy satin and cream lacy satin. Underwear to be seen, Hope had said with a meaningful look. Seen by a man, she had added, in case her meaning wasn’t clear. Of course, she hadn’t been in her forswearing-men phase then.
Faith didn’t think things were going to go anywhere near that far, but she picked up the lacy cream set anyway.
Then she stood – still, silent and naked. Because just in case events did move in that direction, she should be prepared. She had lost count of the number of times she’d advised women never to rely on the man. She pulled out the bottom drawer of her bedside cabinet, felt around and took out a tube of cream, a small circular plastic container. It was a very long time since she had needed either.
Her pulse was beating fast as she walked down her garden, through the gate and up towards Chris’s cottage carefully bearing her casserole. As he opened the door, she realised he had changed too, into dark trousers and a white shirt. He looked wonderful.
As it was still warm, Chris had moved the table and chairs out from the conservatory to the patio. They had Faith’s food with lovely crusty rolls to soak up the gravy. Chris poured two glasses of a full-bodied red wine, with orange juice for Molly. Then there was ice-cream for afterwards, a splashy bath time, two stories – one read by each of them – and finally the little girl was tucked up fast asleep in bed, the scare of the afternoon over, full of a lovely day to dream about instead.
Chris bent over, touched her forehead gently with his lips and ushered Faith back downstairs. On the patio again with dusk falling, he refilled their glasses, sipped from his and said, ‘All the things that have gone wrong over the last five years, the bitterness, the despair – all the times I’ve known I was failing ... but she’s worth it. I swear my heart stopped this afternoon when I couldn’t find her.’
‘You’re lucky.’ Faith turned her head as if studying the plants in the border, tears stinging her eyes.
‘I didn’t feel lucky for a long time, but yes, even through all the anger, guilt and sheer helplessness, it’s the one thing I’ve always hung on to. Lorraine and I got married in haste. We were in love. We thought we knew each other, but we didn’t. She didn’t ever try to understand how I felt about my work, my department. And even though I tried to be around for her as much as I could, I often failed. There were arguments all the time, accusations ... But then I think of Molly and I know those years weren’t wasted.’
Faith gave a painful laugh. ‘Whereas Mike and I never argued once. We didn’t have a moment that wasn’t pure happiness. We planned and planned and never thought of the unexpected. So when he was torn away, I had nothing left at all.’
‘You have your memories of his love. There’s nothing to plague your dreams.’
‘But I have nothing of him,’ she whispered, feeling that chasm of emptiness again.
‘Oh, Faith.’ Chris caught her movement of distress and put his hand on hers.
She turned towards him blindly.
His arms came around her, his mouth covered hers, easing the desolation. It started out as nothing more than a kiss of comfort, but as she shifted her body to fit more comfortably against his, it changed. There was a raw need in both of them. Their lips locked, their hearts pounded so hard that Faith could feel the beat of Chris’s against her own ribs.
Not just his heart either. Chris was holding her so tightly she could feel all of him, his arms, his chest, his legs. One hand cupped her neck, kept her pressed against him so their lips met with a searing mutual desire. She matched his caresses with a passion that startled her. Make love to me, Chris? Now. Please? Had she said it aloud?
After long, long moments, his hold relaxed. His hands slipped down her body, held her lightly round her waist. He took his lips from hers, his breathing ragged. ‘I know what I want,’ he said. ‘And it’s not just now, not just because of the picnic and the sunshine and the panic and the meal together and the wine. This has been building for a long time. But it has to be an equal decision.’
‘I do want it.’ And she did, or at least she had wanted it two minutes ago. But now, with him asking, she could see everything they were heading towards draining away. The excitement, apprehension, the burgeoning something inside her was making her uncertain. She was absolutely sure making love with Chris would be wonderful. But she also knew her life would never be the same afterwards.
‘You’re thinking,’ he said softly. ‘Sweetheart, you aren’t worried, are you? Because if you are, we’ll stop.’
‘No. I’ve never been so certain in my life. I’m just thinking that after tonight everything will be different. But I’m looking forward to it.’
‘I feel the same way. If you close your eyes, I could kiss your eyelids.’
She closed them. ‘That sounds nice.’
He kissed her eyelids and it was lovely. Everything was lovely, especially where his hands were roaming now. She felt him undo her top button, then the next and the next. The warm evening air caressed her exposed skin. His hands slid over the mound of her breast, causing her legs to tremble.
They moved wordlessly inside and up the stairs, Faith’s fingers working on Chris’s shirt buttons just as he was working on hers. As they reached his bedroom, her blouse fell away. She felt a wriggle of pleasure at the way his eyes gleamed and his mouth curved into a smile.
‘That is one beautiful bra,’ he murmured.
‘Hope gave it to me for Christmas. She said it was underwear to be seen.’
‘Smart girl, your sister. Am I allowed to do anything more than just look at it?’
His fingers were already sliding around the lace, investigating the slinky straps. Faith experienced an erotic sense of power. ‘We-ell,’ she said. ‘I suppose you could also take it off – if you like.’
‘Oh, I do like. I like very much.’ His hands went round her back, skilled surgeon’s fingers had no difficulty in unfastening the bra clasp. He dropped it carefully onto her blouse. Chris bent his head and took her breast into his mouth and ... and ... this was heaven! Time stood still as she arched her back in pleasure, enjoying sensations that had been missing from her life for so long.
His mouth moved up to hers again. Her hands trembled as she stripped off his shirt. His chest was muscular, covered with a sprinkling of dark hairs. His skin brushing hers seemed to burn her with delight. Her breasts felt full, her nipples stiff with excitement, rubbing against him.
He kissed her again, demanding, insistent, his tongue seeking out the softness of the inside of her mouth. She clutched at him, pulled all of him to her, was suddenly, intoxicatingly aware of his need for her and of her need for him. Her heart was thudding in her chest, this was what she wanted.
He broke off, dazed and reluctant. ‘Faith, this is awkward. I wasn’t expecting this. I haven’t got any ... that is we can’t ...’
She recaptured his mouth. ‘Yes, we can. I didn’t expect – but I did take precautions. Just in case.’
His fingers stroked down her sides, slipped forward and loosened her belt then eased down her trousers. He knelt, letting his fingers trail down her legs, and it felt magic. One by one he took off her shoes leaving her in just the lacy cream knickers. He slip his fingers up her legs again, over the silken scrap of material, hooked his thumbs in the elastic ...
Faith sighed with pure pleasure as he slipped the panties off.
She was naked and she was happy. He stepped back a little, looked at her and she thrilled at the desire in his eyes. ‘You’re still a touch overdressed,’ she murmured. Her hands went to his belt.
She heard an indrawn breath, felt his abdominal muscles tighten. ‘Sweetheart, if you take too long over that I’m going to disgrace myself,’ he said. Before she knew what was happening he had lifted her across to his bed and laid her on it, his hands lingering appreciatively on her waist and hips. How had he done that so easily? Faith hadn’t realised Chris was so strong!
And then he was lying next to her, as naked as she, and as evidently aroused by her nearness as she was by his.
She stretched luxuriously, heady with happiness. He stroked her arms from fingertips down to shoulders. ‘Just lie like that for a moment. Faith, this is so wonderful that I can’t believe it is happening to me.’
‘It’s not just happening to you. It’s happening to us.’ She felt she was in another world. The past, the future had disappeared. There was only the now, and she was wondrously, wondrously happy. And she knew soon she would be happier still. Because he was going to ...
There were only so many places on her face that he could kiss. But he somehow kissed them all, his hands exploring her body at the same time. When she tried to reciprocate, he gently lifted her arms back out of the way. ‘Not finished yet,’ he murmured wickedly.
So she surrendered. And realised through her haze of pleasure that this was something that he was doing not only to her, but for her, almost an act of worship. She arched lustfully, thinking she would let him for now – and then she would do the same for him later.
The kisses didn’t stop at her face. His lips roamed down her neck, across her shoulders onto her breasts. And then she heard herself moaning with pleasure as he took each proud nipple into his mouth, stroked it gently with his tongue. So much delight! Could there be more? But then his head moved even lower and she had to grip her hands together as his flickering tongue brought her to an ecstasy she had forgotten.
After she gasped with incoherent joy she took hold of his shoulders. ‘Enough, Chris, please. My turn.’
His body was magnificent. Muscled, toned, not an ounce of fat on him. But as sensitive as hers. She kissed him greedily in all the places he had kissed her. And she rejoiced in his reactions. She had never really appreciated that a man’s nipples could be as sensitive as hers. Apparently, they were. But when she went even lower, took him into her mouth, he first arched then gasped.
‘Too much,’ he said. ‘Much too much. Another time, sweetheart. Come back up here. There’s something far more important I want us to do together right now.’
She knew. She could feel it in him and in herself. He pulled her up to lie on top of him, kissing her for an endless, soul-jolting moment. Then he rolled them both over so that he was on top. They were moving towards a culmination, a crescendo of mutual need that couldn’t be postponed for much longer.
He slid inside her and it was a moment of joy, like coming home. This was meant to be. She clutched him, moved with him, murmured his name as sensations of glory travelled around her body. She gripped harder, urged him onwards so that he too would share in that moment of ecstasy that was so close, so close, so close ...
‘Chris,’ she screamed. ‘Oh, Chris ...’
‘Faith,’ he said. ‘Faith, Faith, Faith, Faith, Faith.’ There was a groan, a sob of happiness.
And then it was over.
* * *
This was true happiness, Chris thought drowsily. He was as content as he had ever been in his life. Faith was asleep. She lay in his arms, cradled against his chest. He could feel the warmth of her breath on his skin. He didn’t want to wake her, but just for a moment, very gently, he stroked his fingertips down her naked back. She was wonderful. He was the luckiest man in the world.