Aaron and Natalie walked into Aaron's lab. He dialed the number on the message and waited with the phone on speaker so Natalie could hear the conversation. Ian Fachan was brief and direct to the point. "As you probably know by now, I resigned from Remedcon and I want to talk with you about what is going on. My wife has spoken with Darcey Taylor and she may want to join us."
"Mr. Fachan, do you and your wife want to come here or should we meet someplace more discrete?"
They could hear bits of the conversation at the other side of the phone. "At this point it doesn’t really matter where we meet. Taylor is looking for a piece of my hide and will probably find out that I spoke to you no matter where that happens."
"Can you come here tomorrow morning? I must also ask if you would be okay with MI5 being included in our meeting."
Once again, there was chatter on the other side then Fachan said, "We can be there tomorrow at ten if that works for you. And no, I don't mind if MI5 is present."
After closing the call, Aaron called Shaun to inform him of Ian's desire to meet the following morning "How do I handle this?"
"You let them talk. They asked to speak with you so you let them. Ask why they are here and shut up. I'll be there to help if you need it"
Natalie called it a night, "I'll be in around nine tomorrow. You have plans for tonight?"
"Not sure yet," said Aaron as he fumbled with his mobile. "I may see if a friend wants to join me for dinner."
"Have a good night," she said as Natalie left his lab.
It had been a long week. He was physically tired and emotionally drained. Closing his eyes and resting his head on the back of his chair, Aaron thought through the events of the past four days. Everything pointed to Taylor as the key target and now he knew why. But who was responsible for the bombings? He worried that whoever was doing this would escalate the attacks. His mind played pictures as if he were in a movie theater. He could hear the sounds and clearly see the images and faces.
"You look like you are contemplating the woes of the world, my friend," said Akerheart as he came into the lab.
With his eyes still closed, Aaron said, "It sure seems like that at times. What has you here so late on a Friday night? Shouldn't you be home with that lovely wife of yours, or are you in the dog house for some reason?" He opened his eyes and turned his chair to face his friend and coworker.
"Came in to check a few things. Being on babysitting detail for the Remedcon directors is getting old very fast." Akerheart could see the distress on Aaron's face and said, "I saw your door open and wondered if you were okay." He leaned against the worktable facing Aaron. "Want to talk about it yet?"
Aaron knew he was not asking about the case, but about Aaron's personal life. "I knew I made the right decision as soon as I arrived here. I've been shy and somewhat introverted my whole life, initially due to my brains, and then due to being a nerdy gay teen." Akerheart listened as Aaron opened up.
"When I was thrust into the Tameron kidnapping, I felt totally out of place. I was like a fish out of water, but I knew I had to do what was necessary to get Ethan back. So I did things I never thought I could do. Now I realize that those things were not really out of my comfort zone. I learned that I enjoy clubbing. I really enjoy the loud, heart stopping music. I find myself getting lost in the rhythm, the heady beat, the smells, the alcohol, and the hot guys."
Akerheart sat in Aaron's side chair, relaxed with his arm on the table and said, "So what has you so bothered?"
"I'm not really bothered. I feel lost, as if I have come to a crossroad of sorts and I don't know which way to turn. I know I don't want what Barry wants, but what do I really want? That is my dilemma. Does this make sense to you?"
"It most definitely does, Aaron. You came here as a techie with the idea that you would grow into the role at Andrews and learn about yourself outside the firm. Then, through no choice of your own, you were thrust into finding Ethan. And you know what?" asked Akerheart as he looked at his friend. Aaron said nothing, he waited for the words he knew were coming.
"You did extremely well in the most amazing way possible. You threw yourself into the case, took on the role of a master with a sub, and got Ethan and six other young people back to their families. You grew up in a matter of weeks, not years. Now you are wondering what's next in your life, right?"
Aaron remained quiet for a few minutes. He thought about Akerheart's words and the question he asked. "Part of what you say is right. I found myself thrust into being someone I was not. It was role-playing and I acted my part well. I've done that in school lots of times. I had to pretend I was not the nerdy genius, the smartest person in my school, the one who received a perfect score on the college entrance exams, the guy who didn't date, but pretended to enjoy the company of girls. It was all playacting and I did it well. I had no choice. If I didn't, my life would have been hell. This is different. I'm not acting out a role in a play. This is my life and I just don't know what I want."
"So you're saying that you are normal. Everyone goes through what you are experiencing at some time in their lives. Some people do it in their forties. That's why it's called a mid life crisis. Others never do, they know exactly what they want in their lives and go for it with gusto. You, my friend, are normal. How does it feel to be normal, not different for a change?"
Aaron looked at his coworker with awe. Never in his life did he feel normal. He was always different and always had a plan to overcome the emotions of that difference. "Normal; I don't know what that is."
"Well get used to it. In this, Aaron, you are perfectly normal. Yes, you are a genius, with an amazingly hot body to add to your amazingly hot brain. You awe me most of the time and I know you do that to others as well. Why do you think Hank made you the focal point in this case? What you need to do right now is approach this situation as if it were a calculus problem. Think it through, find the clues, and solve it. If you think you made the wrong decision, change it. Enjoy what you have in front of you. Live, Aaron. Are you going to talk with Barry about this? Are you going to tell him you don't want what he wants?"
"I'm meeting him in an hour for dinner. I'd like to know what he really wants and hopefully we can agree that I am not what he thinks he wants."
"Then what? Are you going to one of your loud, heady beat, hot boy clubs?"
Aaron laughed at Akerheart's description of the clubbing scene, but knew it was what he had said earlier. "I might just do that. It all depends on how dinner goes with Barry. One thing I know for sure is that he is not coming home with me."
"Good. It seems to me, that you have made an important decision." Akerheart stood, walked to the door, and then said, "Aaron, you are a remarkable young man with an amazing life in front of you. Take your time to enjoy it. And by the way, my door is always open."
The two coworkers left Andrews, each with his own evening in mind.
Aaron walked into one of Barry's favorite pubs and saw him in conversation with a hot looking older guy. He had no intention of humiliating or embarrassing him, especially in a pub he frequented. He surprised Barry with a hug before he could react to his presence. Whispering into his ear, Aaron said, "Tonight I am not sir or master. I'm just a friend who is having dinner with you." Releasing his date and turning to the other man at the bar he said, "Hi, I'm Aaron," and stuck out his hand for a shake.
After a few minutes of general conversation, Aaron signaled the server that they were ready for a table. Barry walked slightly behind Aaron and remained submissive even after he was told to relax. At the table, Aaron turned to Barry and said, "Listen, tonight we are just two friends enjoying each other's company at dinner. No dom / sub, no master / slave, just two friends enjoying dinner together, so stop being submissive to me or I'll leave."
Once seated and appetizers ordered, Aaron asked Barry to tell him how he felt about the initiation. "At first I was nervous. Tom said he would make all the arrangements and all I had to do was show up. No one explained the ritual until I was spread eagle in the room. When they put the blindfold on me, I freaked knowing what that does to people we interrogate. When they added the earmuffs, I almost pissed myself. But I was determined to go through with it, no matter what happened."
"I watched it all and I must say I'm not sure I could have gone through with it. I guess that's one of the differences between you and me," said Aaron as the server brought their first course. "You held onto that orange ball as if your life depended on doing so. Did the flogging hurt?"
"Oh my god did it hurt. At one point when Clint was thrashing my balls, I thought I'd pass out, but all of a sudden the pain changed. Clint later explained that pain becomes euphoric when the brain sends signals to the body to release some type of endorphins. I'm not sure of the technical terms for what I felt, but it actually felt good after a while."
Aaron watched as Barry explained how he felt. Barry enjoyed telling him what was going on in his head during the ritual. "What happened when you went to Clint's house afterward?"
"Clint had me drink several bottles of water. He said my body had gone through a traumatic event and needed the water to help recover. He explained that I only went through about half of what the other two guys received. Then he and his boy took me to his dungeon, strapped me into a sling and Clint showed me what real cock and ball torture was like."
Aaron stopped with his fork half way to his mouth. "You took more torture?"
Barry smiled, lowered his head in what appeared to be self-assessment and said, "I let them do whatever they wanted to do to me. Once again I fell into what Clint called 'the zone' and my body relaxed. In fact it really started to feel good."
Aaron had heard about prisoners who endured levels of torture that no one could have imagined enduring. Studies later showed that the brain causes the body to go into a zone of acceptance by sending endorphins and other chemicals into the blood stream. The prisoners were able to endure the torture and didn't reveal the information their torturers wanted. Years later, new types of torture were developed that caused psychological harm if the victim didn't yield. Water-boarding immediately came to mind.
The two men ate in silence until Aaron said, "I think by now, you know that I am not the type of master or dom you want. Am I right in assuming that?"
Barry put his fork down, looked Aaron in the eyes and said, "I realized that after you held me the other night. When I talked to Clint and Tom about you, they both said you were more like Tom than Clint. They said the term is alpha male."
Aaron laughed at the way Barry explained his understanding. "I'm not laughing at you, Barry. It took me years to realize what I am not. And in two minutes you clearly explain what I am. What are you going to do now?"
"First and foremost I want to continue to be your friend. I may have overstepped by asking you to be my dom, but now I know better. Tom suggested I ask you for direction."
Again Aaron laughed. "Tom has more knowledge about this community that you want to join, in his little finger than I have in my entire brain. Yet he suggested you ask me for direction?"
Barry laughed at the situation then said, "I trust you Aaron. How would you suggest I proceed?"
After finishing their dinners, Aaron said, "I guess if I were in your shoes, I'd talk to Tom and his boy for guidance. The guidance I'm suggesting is geared toward the type of clubs that cater to the master / slave relationship. You know; things like that. Then I'd go to Clint and ask him if he would be willing to help you find a master. Just remember that you have a career that would be destroyed if you submit to the wrong master."
Barry reached across the table, took Aaron's hand in his and said, "Thank you. I knew that contacting you was right, even if you are not the master I want."
"It's been a very busy week and I have to be at work tomorrow morning, so I'm going home to get some sleep."
Barry tried to pay for dinner, but Aaron stopped him, "Let me do this again. There will be a time when I need your help." Aaron took a cab home, changed and slept like a baby.