Forget the former things;
do not dwell on the past.
See, I am doing a new thing!
Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?
Isaiah 43:18–19
Great faith comes from great victories and great victories come from great battles.
Steve Dulin
I love traveling through the northeastern United States during autumn, drinking in the jewel-toned colors we don’t see much of in Texas. What always seems to capture my attention is the solitary tree in the midst of changing color but surrounded by those that have not yet begun the process. Different from all those around it, the tree stands out.
In the same way, during certain seasons in our lives, God begins changing us from within, perhaps leading us to forge a new path or to stand apart from all those around us not called to the same journey or from those resisting change. Sometimes they even resist the change in us, comfortable with who we have always been while unsure of who we are becoming. It’s not easy to blaze a new path, but the rewards are beautiful if we stick with it. Paul writes:
So here’s what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don’t become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You’ll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you. (Rom. 12:1–2 Message)
Trials always change us. If we love God and trust him in the dark hours, staying open to lessons he has for us along the way, then our hearts receive the blessing of transformation. When walking in the valley, the only way out is up. He is our only path out of our despair.
God promises to restore what the locusts have eaten—what our enemy has stolen (see Joel 2:25). Isaiah 61 reminds us he offers to give us so much more. If we allow him to work in us, he promises we will be comforted. He will give us beauty for ashes, joy for our despair. We can forfeit these blessings if we run from him and his work in us rather than trusting him to bring us through.
I had despaired deep within for weeks. Day after day I stared at the same four walls. On bed rest, attached to IVs, and in continuous pain, I did not resemble my usual self.
My strength was failing. Sorrow was all I could taste. Hope was fleeting. I didn’t know what the next day would bring, but I couldn’t stand more of the same.
Days blurred together. My only indication of the time that passed was the sun rising and setting, yet I couldn’t tell you any of the detail in between.
Life continued as normal for everyone else. Family and friends maintained their daily rituals, with work and school routines. Meanwhile, I continued listening to and believing the enemy’s lies, which told me I was useless while unable to continue my usual productive routine. I thought I had failed . . . myself, my family, my patients, even God.
While I was on bed rest and unable to work, others relayed that they were both thinking of me and praying for me. I listened to the spirit of doubt. Were they really? I didn’t feel any better. And shamefully, if I was honest with myself, hadn’t I promised to pray for others in the past and then forgotten? I too had told people I was “thinking about them,” and I did, but what did that mean exactly? What comfort did that bring? Now I really wondered.
The sorrow I felt did not resemble anything I had ever known before. Weeks and months of intense physical pain led to soul-churning despair. As my physical energy and strength depleted, so did my emotional reserve.
I decided if I was going to fight for my physical and emotional health to return, I didn’t want to be left unchanged. I wanted to benefit from the experience and come out of it a different person than I had been going in. I prayed that the torment I endured would not be wasted and that the Lord would use the experience to draw me closer to him and to help someone else.
Now, on the other side of this experience, I am thankful. God never protects us from that which he will use to perfect us. He changed me. That painful experience changed and challenged me in unexpected ways:
Going through depression gave me a fresh revelation of Romans 12:15: “Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep” (NLT). Today if I promise to pray for someone, I will—not just once or twice but every time the Lord puts them on my heart until they tell me the situation has resolved.
Because of what I went through, I’m able to minister to and speak life into others who are suffering, whether it’s through this book, speaking engagements, or praying with someone in need who crosses my path. I can now relate in a way I otherwise couldn’t because we have walked through similar valleys.
A couple friends and I recently attended our church’s annual women’s conference. As we sat in the balcony, a young disheveled woman climbed over us a few minutes into the service and took the vacant seat next to me. As the evening concluded with praise and worship, I noticed the woman softly crying. I sensed the Lord telling me to put an arm around her. I didn’t know her and thought I might embarrass her. I also sensed the familiar ping of pain. Wouldn’t I want someone to reach out to me in the midst of my pain? As I put my arm around her, her shoulders heaved and her tears broke into sobs.
At the conclusion of the service, as all the women around us gathered their belongings and the friends they came with, she took my hand to thank me. I asked her if she would like me to pray with her. Seemingly shocked that anyone would offer, she nodded her consent. Before we prayed, she shared her painful story—the mistakes she had made; her years of depression, anxiety, and loneliness; her concerns that God didn’t care and that she might always be destined to feel that way; and her fear that God didn’t see her pain and that no one would understand.
God saw her perfectly at that intersection in her journey. He knew where she would sit after arriving late. He put her right next to someone who could relate to so much of her pain but who could also share hope from the other side. She begged to hear more of my story in part, I think, because she needed to borrow hope. We continued to talk and pray as the thousands of women left the building and the maintenance crew cleaned around us. As I wiped her tears, I sensed a change. She walked in crying tears of desperation, but she was leaving with tears of hope and gratitude.
God repeatedly offers me the opportunity to partner with him and share my story to offer encouragement and hope to those who are earlier in their walk but on the same journey I traveled. No greater joy exists than watching God use for good what the enemy intended to harm me. I receive fresh revelation of how he gives us beauty for our ashes and the oil of gladness for our despair (Isa. 61:3). He doesn’t waste our pain. He turns our biggest messes into our greatest messages. God uses my pain to help others. And he will use yours, if you’re willing, in ways you can’t even imagine.
A New Thing
God’s Word declares, “Anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun” (2 Cor. 5:17 NLT). When we agree with the enemy’s lies about ourselves and our situation, we in essence tell God we don’t believe he changed our lives when Christ paid the ultimate price for us on the cross.
When we deal with the roots of depression and live in the new life he gave us, dramatic change occurs. He gives us a new heart, a new identity, and a new perspective. We don’t cower before or fear depression but laugh at the enemy’s tactics while standing on God’s truth. How would you like to be free not only from depression but also from the fear of depression, the shadow of depression? How would you like to look back and say, “I remember those depressed days—how different I am now”? You can!
For years I lived under the influence of the enemy. Under a spirit of heaviness and oppression, self-pity, bitterness, unforgiveness, and resentment, I was unable to love myself or receive the love of others or God. I didn’t realize it at the time, so I wouldn’t have admitted to it. Only after I began searching for and then believing God’s truth about me did the change occur.
I recently received a message from someone that is a testament to the change within me: “I have never seen a picture of you where you are not beaming with joy! I want that!” I haven’t always been this way. Previously, I might have smiled on the outside, but I did not have joy within. He has truly done a “new thing” in my life. “Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?” (Isa. 43:18–19).
God doesn’t play favorites. If you want God to do a new thing in your life, he will—but you have to do your part first. You have to stop agreeing with the lies of the enemy and consciously choose to believe God’s truth.
Moving from the valley of despair to setting my feet on a higher place began when I made the conscious decision to check my thoughts (2 Cor. 10:5) to see if they agreed with the enemy’s lies or God’s truth. That required hard work! We have between fifty thousand to seventy thousand thoughts each day. It takes discipline to take our thoughts captive and not unconsciously agree with the enemy one, one hundred, or one thousand times in the course of the day. But the rewards are worth the effort. “No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it” (Heb. 12:11). I want that peace, the peace the enemy tried to kill. Do you?
I longed for God to lift the blanket of depression. He did. He changed my heart. “And I will give you a new heart, and I will put a new spirit in you. I will take out your stony, stubborn heart and give you a tender, responsive heart” (Ezek. 36:26 NLT). In doing so, I became less anxious, less self-focused, less angry, and more loving, joyful, peaceful, and compassionate.
God’s new heart erases fear, shame, and guilt. He provides a perspective based not on our moods or our circumstances but on our identity in Christ. With this comes a separation from past sins or shame, a purpose, confidence, joy, and peace. The overwhelming experience of depression can become a little smudge in the rearview mirror as God builds a new heart and a different character. He can take this pressing pain and turn it into a motivation for praise, thanksgiving, worship, and service to others as we have compassion for those who struggle. Once he begins to set our feet on high places, we can, like Paul, comfort others with the comfort we have received (2 Cor. 1:4).
Your Rx
My Prayer for You
Father, I know the pain of despair and loneliness. I pray for this dear one who is in need of comfort and assurance that this pain is not for naught. Please provide for their needs today. Will you provide a friend to walk this journey with them? You’ve sent the ultimate comforter in the form of the Holy Spirit. Go into the depths of the despair with your soothing balm and give your peace that truly passes all understanding. I thank you for your faithfulness and meeting our needs even now. Thank you that you never waste our pain but will use it to change us, perfect us, and help us minister to others. Because of Jesus, I ask these things, amen.
Recommended Playlist
“Nothing Is Wasted,” Jason Gray, © 2011 by Centricity Music
“Any Other Way,” Tenth Avenue North, © 2010 by Reunion Records
“Live Like That,” Sidewalk Prophets, © 2012 by Fervent Records
“Lay Me Down,” Chris Tomlin, © 2013 by sixstepsrecords/Sparrow Records
“Even This Will Be Made Beautiful,” Jason Gray, © 2014 by Centricity Music
“Nothing Is Wasted,” Elevation Worship, © 2013 by Essential Worship
“Something Beautiful,” Steven Curtis Chapman, © 2013 by Reunion/Chapman