Chapter Forty-One

“Well, what do you think?” Grace asked Kristine during a lunchtime lull at the San Francisco Art Exhibition.

“Are you kidding? This is fantastic. I had to hold a tight rein on myself to keep from barreling over people I’ve admired for a long while.”

“Ruth is in heaven with the attention she’s getting. What a crazy coincidence that we approached her for a project and landed this.”

“She’d been invited before?”

“They’ve been trying to get her for years, but she didn’t want the work of organizing a trip down here. I was more than happy to involve the campus in the planning and get our students this great exposure. What a success!”

“An amazing success. This is the first free moment we’ve had. Our students have had such good reception from buyers, and quite a few have made post-graduation contacts that they’re really excited about. How are the community artists doing?”

“You mean has your stuff been moving while you’ve been watching over your students? I still wish you could have brought the rodeo series with you.”

“But that’s not the Northcoast.”

“I know. You made the right call bringing the Woodley Island harbor photos.”

“People like boats. Pretty sunsets, reflections. It makes them feel introspective.”

“I thought trees sold.”

Kristine shrugged. “I thought you had trees covered, but I didn’t see any of Robyn’s bowls.”

“I gave up on that argument. I know her creations would have flown off the table here, but she worried that she wouldn’t have enough stock for the North Country Fair if she let any come with me.”

“She’s not interested in throwing a larger net?”

“Not in the least.”

“Seems like she does okay on the smaller scale.”

“She does,” Grace said, annoyed that Kristine seemed to be supporting Robyn’s argument that she didn’t need the exposure the trip to the city offered.

“How are things going between you two? I haven’t had any time to ride, so I haven’t been able to pump her for information.”

Grace swatted her without conviction. “I have a sandwich run to make before the next rush. Come along?”

“Sure.”

Grace knew Kristine wasn’t going to let the subject drop and didn’t feel comfortable discussing her dating life in front of the students. As she figured, once they were in the Mini Kristine broached the topic again. “For how great everything seems to be going, you don’t seem happy. Are you upset that she’s not here?”

“Yes. She should be here. I knew it in Arcata, and seeing the woodworking here…” She maneuvered through the city streets. “Her work is far superior to anything I’ve seen at this exhibition. I could almost understand when she said she wanted to keep her stock for the North Country Fair, but then she decided to share her space there with Tyler, so it makes no sense for her not to be here.”

“You sure you don’t need someone with more ambition? Someone who loves the city and the limelight as much as you do?”

“I used to miss the big city.” She remembered how Gloria had teased her about her penchant for spending the weekend in San Francisco, taking in the latest shows and galleries, but then she thought about walking through the quiet town next to Robyn and how much like home it felt to her.

“But not anymore?”

“Arcata feels like home. I love the university, and there is so very much about Robyn that feels perfect. But it’s tough too. We’re not spring chickens like you and Gloria were, ready to strike out on your own and create a life together.”

“At least you’re both set money-wise, and in the same town. That seems like it would make things a lot easier. For me, moving there felt like a huge risk. I had to worry about whether I’d be able to pull my own weight. I needed to know I’d be able to contribute and not just be a freeloader.”

“But like you said, Robyn and I are both financially solvent.”

“Having tenants is part of Robyn’s livelihood, though.”

“Exactly! Part of. As in if I were living there, the money I could contribute would more than compensate what she needs in rental income to maintain a separate household. As it is, I feel like a renter when I’m at her place, like we never have complete privacy.” Once it had become clear to her that she was perfectly content being an aunt, she had only ever pictured finding a woman to share her life and home.

“Is it just an issue of money?”

Grace thought of how Jen regarded Robyn as a mother and couldn’t imagine asking Robyn to end her lease. “I know it wouldn’t go over well if I suggested that we could live the way I want to on my income. She needs to feel self-sufficient, and I know she could be financially independent if she rethought her marketing strategy, but on that we clearly bump heads. I feel stuck. I could see a future with us, but only if we had the house to ourselves. But I don’t see her being able to make that shift. I know better than to try to force her to change.”

“And you don’t know if you could be comfortable there with the current setup?”

“No. The problem is that I’m not.”

“I’m sorry, Grace.”

“Sorry to dump all of that on you. I know you’ve got plenty on your plate and don’t need to hear about my problems. How is Gloria’s mom doing?”

“She’s at home, weak but putting up a good front. We’re going over as often as we can. I worry about how rambunctious Caemon is, but she says it’s more important for him to have real memories of her.” Kristine closed her eyes overcome with emotion. “She asked me to take as many pictures as I can, so we won’t forget. I keep looking at my images, especially of Gloria’s parents together, and I see exactly what I want. That kind of adoration to the very end. It’s really something.”

“I see that in you and Gloria. And I want it too,” Grace whispered.

They found the sandwich shop where she had preordered food for the exhibitors. Grace was relieved to have a diversion from her conversation with Kristine. She’d never have the opportunity to see whether her own parents might have continued to adore each other once their children had left the nest. Grace tended to the bill, convincing the young man behind the counter that he wanted to help carry the order to the car.

Settled into the drive back to the hotel, Kristine noted, “You’re as good as Tom Sawyer at getting people to do a job for you. I wish it was as easy to get what you want from the relationship with Robyn. Gloria and I like the two of you so much and were so excited to hear that you’d gotten together. I wish it was all as simple as two people finding each other.” Kristine reached out and squeezed Grace’s arm.

“When is it ever simple?” Grace tried to make her voice light but couldn’t shake the question of her compatibility with Robyn. She knew that they adored each other, but looking into the future, she could not see them coexisting calmly. She couldn’t imagine a way past their conflicts. It could be a good thing to discover a deal breaker early on, stop things before she got too attached, she mused. Honestly she feared she was already past that point.