Along with her cushy new position as Vice President, Damita was given a wonderfully large corner office with a view. She should have been jumping for joy. Instead, she was thinking about how best to fix the craziness that had become her life. She had everything she had ever dreamed of, but many of the wishes she had made were wrought with all sorts of twists and turns she hadn’t expected.
As she looked out over the city, pensively, her phone rang.
“Hi, Mom! You’re my first phone call in my new office! You should see it. I have an incredible view!”
“Well, I guess I could see it if someone would invite me out to lunch. I could stop by and get a gander at this unbelievable office and share a meal with my only daughter. All I need is an invite.”
Damita laughed. “I get the hint, Mom. I don’t need a rock to fall on me.”
“I was starting to think that you did. You hardly ever call anymore and when you do, you only stay on the phone for a few minutes. Lately, it seems like just about everything I know about you I find out secondhand from Carmella.”
“I worked so hard to make that deal I told you about, that I’m in burnout mode.”
“Baby, through the years I’ve seen you work just as hard and still manage to maintain relationships and get everything else done. When your father was sick, you ran back and forth with him and did all the same stuff you’re doing now, without missing a beat.”
“The difference is I wasn’t married then.”
“That’s exactly my point. When are you going to drop that dead weight? A spouse is supposed to add to your life, not subtract from it.”
“I will. I’m staying with Carmella until I can find my own place and, eventually, I will start divorce proceedings.”
“Good for you!”
“Mom, in the meantime, if Neal should contact you, would you promise me you won’t engage him in any way.”
“That boy knows better than to get in touch with me. I’ll give him a beat down like he’s never had in his life.”
“See, that’s what I’m talking about. Sometimes you forget how old you are.”
“Age doesn’t have a thing to do with it. I refuse to let anyone bully me, including Mr. Neal Bully Westman.”
Damita chuckled. “Will you at least call me or Carmella if he does try to get in touch with you?”
“I promise I will.”
“Thank you, Mom.”
Damita called the receptionist and let her know that her mother would be stopping by. She suddenly felt an uncustomary sense of calm. Despite the reputation New York City had for being an unfriendly and often unsightly city, there were moments like these when New York could feel so serene and quite beautiful. Looking down from her window on the seventy-seventh floor, she was reminded of how infinitesimal each life was compared to the world at large. Looking down, the people were like ants. She realized that in the scheme of things, each person’s struggles, wants and needs seemed incredibly small when compared to the entire planet. She had been so wrapped up in her own problems she had forgotten about what was truly important. She had forgotten how to stop and smell the roses. She couldn’t wait for her mother to arrive, so she could show her the incredible view from her much-coveted corner office. While she waited, she unpacked some of the files her assistant had not yet gotten to.
Damita was surprised to see her mother being escorted to her office by none other than Mr. Underhill himself.
“Look who I found wandering the halls,” he joked.
“Mr. Underhill, thank you so much. You remember my mother, don’t you?”
“Of course I do. We met at the wedding. She is still as much of a delight now as she was then.”
“Thank you, Mr. Underhill,” Karen said.
“Please, I feel old enough already. Call me Michael.”
“Of course, Michael, and you can call me Karen.”
“So, where are you ladies off to?”
“I’m not sure yet. I’ll figure something out by the time we get out of the building.”
“Something tells me Karen would like Montrachet.”
“You might be right, Mr. Underhill. My mother is a bit of a wine connoisseur.”
He pulled out his cell phone and dialed his secretary. “Abby, would you make a reservation under my name at Montrachet? It’s for Damita and her mother. Make sure the bill is taken care of.”
“Oh, Mr. Underhill, that’s not necessary,” Damita said.
“I know it’s not necessary. I want to. If I weren’t so busy, I would join you both, but duty calls. This way, at least I’ll be there in spirit.”
“You’re quite welcome, Karen.”
• • •
Damita and Karen were seated immediately after arriving at the restaurant. The white and bronze décor was aesthetically pleasing and Karen looked around, before nodding her head appreciatively.
They were given their menus and Damita and Karen both looked them over.
“Your boss was right about this place; very elegant décor. I love the Old World paintings and this wine list is world-class. It’s very nice.”
Her mother looked around at the plates of others in the restaurant. “Look at the presentation. The food looks like a work of art. Whenever I’m in a restaurant like this, I think about going to culinary school.”
“I don’t know why you don’t. You’re an incredible cook. You should do it. You deserve to do something just for you.”
Karen appeared deep in thought. “Maybe I will.”
Damita smiled. “Good; now I know what to get you for your birthday.”
Damita was happy that after their phone conversation, her mother was discussing something other than Neal.
After lunch was over, Damita asked for the check and was told it was already taken care of by Mr. Underhill. Her mother made a face that indicated she was impressed.
As they left the restaurant, there was a question Karen couldn’t resist asking. “Are you really that good?”
Damita smiled. “Yes, Mom, I guess I am.”
Karen did a quick happy dance. “I know that’s right! My daughter is a hot-shot executive. Your father would be so proud. I remember how he used to puff his chest out when you were a little girl. Every time you brought home an A or when you received an award of any kind he was so proud. You were his shining achievement, and mine.”
“I couldn’t have done it without the two of you.”
“I have something for you. It’s sort of a congratulations gift. I saw it and immediately knew you should have it.”
She reached inside of her handbag and pulled out a beautifully gift-wrapped box.
“Are you coming back upstairs?” Damita asked.
“No, I don’t want to interrupt your work any more than I already have.”
“You’re never an interruption.”
“It’s okay. I’ve never been one to overstay my welcome.”
“Well, if you’re not going to come upstairs, I’ll open it now.”
Damita ripped open the wrapping and opened the box. Inside was a beautiful bird pendant. She held it in her hand and gazed at it.
“It’s beautiful.”
“Like I said, it reminded me of you and that phrase about the phoenix rising from the ashes.” She stopped and took her daughter’s face in her hands. “That’s you, you know. You are the phoenix rising from the ashes. As the story goes, the phoenix is a mythical bird with fiery plumage that lives up to one hundred years. Near the end of its life, it settles into its nest of twigs, which then burns ferociously, reducing bird and nest to ashes. From those ashes, a fledgling phoenix rises, renewed and reborn. That, my beautiful daughter, is you. Don’t let anyone, and I do mean anyone, tell you anything different. Do you hear me?”
Damita smiled to hold back the tears. “Yes, Mom, I hear you.”
Damita hugged her mother and held on to her tightly, not wanting to let go. She couldn’t help but think how much simpler things were when she was little and could run to her mother or father when she was hurting and they would kiss it and make it all better. She was happy to see that there were those times when her mother could still do that.
As she was saying goodbye to her mother, she could see Tina across the street with a large box in her hands. She was being escorted out by security. Damita didn’t want to ruin the time she had spent with her mother with talks of Neal. But, as she saw Tina put the box she was carrying into the trunk of a car, she wondered if Neal had anything to do with why she was leaving.
“Goodbye, baby,” Karen said, as she headed for the subway.
“Bye, Mom. I’ll talk to you soon. I promise.”
After lunch, Damita stopped by Wendy’s office. “I shouldn’t be engaging in office gossip, but I have to know. Do you know anything about why Tina was leaving here with a large box and security in tow?”
“Of course I do. Apparently, she has developed quite the little drug habit and was caught embezzling money.”
Damita shook her head. “That doesn’t make any sense. With bonus and salary, she has to pull in six figures easy. She’s single, with no family. How much drug money could someone possibly need?”
Wendy waved her hand. “It would appear, a lot. From what I’ve been hearing it was a lot of money and the firm is probably going to press charges.”
“You’ve got to be kidding me. You know this would never have happened if she hadn’t hooked up with Neal. I’m starting to think that man is evil incarnate.”
“I’m glad you’re starting to think that. You need to know it and believe it. That’s the only way you are going to truly sever all ties.”
“I will. I’m waiting for things to level out. I’ve already left. Now all I need to do is file for divorce and it will be over.”
Wendy pursed her lips and shook her head regretfully. “Judging from what you have told me about Neal and what I’ve seen firsthand, it may take more than filing for divorce to get rid of a man like him. I understand your hesitation. Someone like Neal can be very frightening and intimidating. You’re afraid to go and you’re afraid to stay. But, believe me, you need to decide that it’s over not only so it’s clear to him, but also so that it’s clear to you. Until you do that, you will not be in a position intellectually or emotionally to do all that you need to do to get him out of your life for once and for all. There’s something I’ve considered showing you several times, but I chickened out. After getting to know you better, I realize it’s something you must see.”
Wendy pulled down the shades, before pulling up her shirt. Straight down the middle of her chest was a terrible scar.
“Oh my God, Wendy, what happened?”
“Alex is what happened. He was fun and exciting from the moment I met him. He was like a drug for me at first. Then, he started to get possessive and out of control. By the time he started hitting me and I realized he was completely insane, he was following me, confronting my friends, both male and female; and showing up at my job. I got an order of protection and for about six months it seemed like it had worked and he was finally gone, until one day I was coming back from the movies with a date. Alex stabbed us both multiple times. I was a lot luckier than my friend, Lucas. He didn’t make it. I, on the other hand was stabbed in the heart.
“For years I wondered if the gesture was meant to be poetic or if it was merely where the blade happened to land. A portion of my lung had to be removed and my left ventricle and left atrium had to be repaired. I’m still not sure what took longer to repair, my mind or my body. As if to add insult to injury, Alex’s parents hired him a hot-shot lawyer, who used a defense called settled insanity, which basically means if you’ve been using drugs for a really long time, you can plead temporary insanity, if you hurt or kill someone. According to Alex’s attorney, Alex was not only a long-term drug user, but he had personality defects that predisposed him to psychosis. Therefore, according to his defense, Alex’s psychosis on the night he attacked Lucas and I was triggered by chronic substance abuse. He was found not guilty by reason of insanity, based on the contention that temporary psychosis not caused by an episode of intoxication constitutes settled insanity and qualifies as a complete defense.
“As soon as I found out he would not be going to prison, I made preparations to leave California and move someplace where he would never find me. That’s how I ended up here. I was forced to uproot my entire life and move to a new city in order to stay alive. Even though I’m here and he’s there, there is not a day that goes by that I don’t think about what will happen when he’s released from the hospital.”
Damita looked at Wendy with a questioning gaze. “Wendy, can I ask you one question; if you had it to do all over again, would you make the same decision? Would you still leave it all behind; your family, your friends?”
Wendy responded strongly and without reservation. “I absolutely would. That’s what we do, isn’t it; whatever we have to in order to stay alive?”
Damita’s face and even her body seemed as though she had been deflated. She slumped in the chair, feeling lost.
Damita was on the verge of crying. “Wendy, I just don’t know if I could ever have enough strength to leave it all behind; my family, my friends, my career. It’s my entire identity.”
“Only you know how dire the situation is. Is there no other way? Could the police be of any help? These are all questions you need to ask yourself. You also need to ask yourself whether or not it’s indeed dire enough to consider leaving, then what is your identity worth? Is it worth your life? After all, you can’t enjoy that identity if you’re not alive.”