Shutting out the wind and entering the hall, Alice was relieved to see that there were only three people in the waiting room. Two women who broke off their chatting when they saw her, one of whom dandled a large snuffling baby, and a gentleman in a smart suit, his overcoat folded on his lap and a dark green trilby with a tiny feather in it on the chair beside him.
She’d know those cropped treacle-coloured curls anywhere.
‘Fergus!’ she cried with joy as he rose and came to greet her. ‘How utterly delightful to see you.’ She laughed in disbelief. ‘What are you doing here? You’re not ill, I hope?’
‘I should have warned you I was coming, but it was on an off-chance that I found myself in the area. I hope you don’t think I’m impolite.’
‘Not at all, but do you have the time to wait? I’ve these ladies to see.’
He smiled across at the women, whose eyes were out on stalks seeing their doctor and the handsome stranger. ‘Of course I’ll wait. I see a pile of Time and Tide over there, that’ll keep me busy.’
‘You’ll be the first to read them after Barbara and me, then. Our patients prefer the local rag.’
‘I like to keep up with the arguments! Find out where I’m going wrong with you feminists.’
She smiled. ‘Take some copies into the sitting room, do, and ask Doreen to bring you some tea.’
‘Thank you. I had tea at my last port of call, though.’
‘I won’t be long.’ Alice turned to invite the mother with the snuffly baby into her consulting room, and afterwards the second woman, who had bad chilblains. By the time she showed her out, Doreen had admitted two more patients, so that it was after six before Alice was able to put up the ‘Surgery Closed’ sign in the window and lock the front door. She hurried into the small sitting room at the back of the house where she found Fergus picking through the bookshelves.
‘I am so sorry,’ she told him. ‘I think we’re safe now, though if the telephone rings with an emergency I might be called away.’
‘It never seems to stop.’
‘Doreen’s very good at putting people off, but some patients are not . . . well, patient and it can be difficult to tell whether they really do need me right away. Let me offer you a drink. I daren’t have one myself, I’ve never liked the idea of breathing fumes over my patients like an old quack.’
‘Whereas I’m properly off-duty.’ Fergus happily accepted a whisky and soda. Alice pulled the curtains against the darkness of the garden while he stirred up the fire, then they sat down in chairs on either side.
‘This is cosy,’ she said and they smiled broadly at one another.
It was a long time since she’d seen him and he looked rather well. He was no longer the slender boy she’d first known, but had filled out and it suited him, giving him a solidity of presence.
Useful, given that his patients needed to feel safe in entrusting themselves to his care on the operating table. Fergus had become an assistant surgeon in the London Hospital where they’d trained, under the eye of the very same man who’d been so rude to Alice and Barbara at the lecture where they’d all first met.
‘I told you once, it’s called fighting the enemy from within,’ Fergus had explained to the women at the time of his appointment. ‘If everybody goes round being scared of him nothing will ever change, but me, I’m one of the rebel Irish and I’ll have none of his attitude.’ It was Fergus’s perennial good humour that made everybody warm to him.
‘You have a nice place here,’ he said, looking around with a wistful expression. ‘The plants, all these pictures. It’s the feminine touch. I miss that. I’ve bought one or two paintings, but otherwise my lodgings are very spartan. I’m not there often, you see.’
‘Barbara’s mad about her plants. The garden’s asleep for the winter, but you must visit in the spring. She’s put in so many bulbs it’s sure to be a riot of colour.’
‘How is she, Barbara?’
‘She’ll be back any minute, I expect. You’ll be able to ask her yourself.’
He appeared thoughtful, then he leaned forward and Alice felt the warmth of his gaze. ‘Then I’d better get my piece in first. I’ve a few days off next week and I wondered if you’d like to come with me to the theatre. There’s a play I’ve been wanting to see, I read a good review in the latest edition of that magazine of yours.’ He looked so hopeful that she felt bad turning him down, but that old wariness had risen in her, that she shouldn’t encourage his attentions.
‘It’s a lovely idea,’ she said quickly, ‘but it’s not easy for me to leave the surgery at the moment. What if I’m needed urgently?’
They looked up at the sounds of commotion in the hall, then there came a brief knock. The door was flung open and Barbara flew into the room.
‘Fergus,’ she cried, ‘how wonderful!’ He rose and she threw her arms round him and hugged him, then held him from her, looking up into his face. ‘How long is it since we’ve seen you? Months. It was that reunion picnic on Hampstead Heath back in May.’ How pretty Barbara was, Alice thought tenderly, as they all sat down. Roses bloomed in her cheeks. She wore a vibrant blue woollen dress, in an old-fashioned style, but the nipped-in waist suited her curvy figure and auburn curls. Alice felt a twinge of envy. Barbara enlivened any gathering she walked into and here she was charming the very charming Fergus.
‘You made us all swim, I remember. Quite the bossy boots you were.’ Fergus’s eyes were full of fun. ‘And how’s your work with the microbes going?’
‘The microbes are very well, thank you. It’s a good place to work.’
Alice always found it difficult to imagine her friend in a laboratory poring over test tubes of blood, or tissue samples in watch glasses, but Barbara seemed to love it and she liked the regular hours even better. She was enjoying the social side of London life. She was often out to dinner in the evenings or going to a concert, and had run through any number of boyfriends while keeping them all at arm’s length. ‘I’m not ready to settle down,’ she often explained to Alice, ‘and maybe I never will be,’ and Alice was relieved when she said this, because she loved their current living arrangements and dreaded a time when they might end.
‘You must join us this evening,’ Barbara told Fergus and Alice’s spirits fell.
‘Oh lor, I forgot we were having visitors.’ Alice had been hoping for a nice quiet evening, emergency phone calls allowing, and the possibility of an early night. She’d not yet caught up on her sleep since the dramatic birth of Baby Lamb.
‘It’s only the Youngs coming and the Bullen boys. Julia Young’s an old school friend of mine, Fergus, and her husband’s an absolute hoot. Joe and Austin Bullen are sweeties, aren’t they, Alice? Fergus would like them, I’m sure.’
‘I must regretfully say no,’ Fergus said, ‘tempting though the prospect is. I promised my landlady I’d be back for dinner and she’s terrifying to behold if I don’t keep my word.’ He swallowed the last of his drink and stood up to go. ‘Alice, you’ll think about what I said, will you? Tuesday or Wednesday would be my suggestion. Send me a note.’
Alice promised she would and they sent him off into the frosty evening.
‘That was nice to see him,’ Barbara said, closing the front door. ‘I’ve always had a soft spot for Fergus.’ She followed Alice into the waiting room and helped her tidy the papers and magazines onto a side table. ‘There was a time when I wondered . . . oh, never mind. It was always you he was really interested in, Alice.’
‘I’m sure it wasn’t,’ Alice said, glad to hide her face as she retrieved a child’s scarf from under a chair. ‘This must be little Donald Cooper’s. Certainly I never encouraged Fergus.’ She straightened wearily, flexing her shoulders. ‘Do you remember you once thought he’d blow us up?’ She laughed at the memory. ‘It was our first day at the hospital.’
‘I do indeed remember.’ Barbara sat on the row of upright chairs and swung her legs up. ‘That was before we got to know him, though. I think he’s lovely, Alice. More confident now, don’t you reckon? He’s grown into himself, as my sainted grandmother would say.’
‘He certainly is different,’ Alice agreed, sitting down opposite and coiling the knitted scarf around her wrist. ‘Do you suppose we are, too? If so, then it must be doing fulfilling work that’s responsible.’
‘You shouldn’t work all the time, Dr Copeman.’ There was a roguish look in Barbara’s eye. ‘Cough up now. What does he want you to do on Tuesday or Wednesday?’
Alice sighed and pulled the scarf tight. ‘Oh, go to the theatre with him, but I’ve told him I’m not reliable. I need to be here.’
‘Why?’
‘In case I’m called out, silly. I have a duty to my patients to be there when they need me. If I’m not they’ll go and find some other doctor.’
‘Alice, you should see yourself. Poker-faced isn’t the word for it. Honestly, that’s ridiculous. We already have to have our friends visit us here because you won’t go out, and then you forget they’re coming. And tonight I’ll bet you anything one of your patients will ring while we’re having fun and you’ll say you’ll go to them. People are so selfish and you let them get away with it.’
‘I don’t. They’re worried and need to be able to rely on me.’ Alice dropped the scarf over the back of a chair and sighed. ‘Look, I’ve chosen this way of life and worked hard for it. But I always knew it meant making sacrifices.’
‘Ho. Sacrifices to your own ego, Alice. You’ll not find many men doctors who take that line.’
‘Possibly not.’ Agitated, Alice stood and started to pace the room, ‘but the men don’t have to try as hard as a lady doctor to attract patients. That’s simply the way it is.’
‘I know that, Alice,’ Barbara said quietly, ‘but I don’t see why it means you have to live like a nun. You’ll grow old and dusty and lonely, my dear.’
‘Of course I won’t. Not with you around to keep me lively. Come on, hadn’t we better prepare for our guests?’ She clasped Barbara’s hand and helped her to her feet.
Barbara held on to Alice’s hand firmly. ‘Not so fast. I insist that you have your theatre trip, Alice. If I promise to be in myself on one of those evenings to field the phone calls, will you go?’
‘I don’t know,’ Alice wailed. ‘To tell you the truth . . . oh, Barbara, it’s . . . well, I like Fergus, but I don’t want to encourage him too much, you see.’
‘My goodness,’ Barbara said, rolling her eyes, ‘it’s only a visit to the theatre. You’d love it!’
‘I probably would. It’s months since I’ve been.’
‘So you’ll tell him you’ll go? Tuesday’s better for me, I think, though I can easily miss the Flytes’ party on Wednesday.’
‘You go to your party, dear. I’ll tell Fergus Tuesday.’ Alice glanced at the clock on the wall. ‘It’s nearly seven. We must help Doreen set out the food.’
*
Fergus strode across the dimly lit foyer of the theatre to meet her. ‘There you are! We must hurry. The curtain’s about to go up.’
‘Fergus, I’m so sorry, it took hours to see my last patient. She had five things wrong with her. Five!’
He took her arm. ‘You’re here now. Come on!’
The usher was shutting the doors when Fergus presented their tickets. Once inside, they scurried through the gloom to their seats near the front as the curtain began to rise. Alice’s last thought before she was caught up in the magic of the play was the relief in Fergus’s face when she’d rushed into the foyer. Poor man, he must have thought she’d stood him up.
At the interval, he guided her through a busy bar and expertly commandeered drinks and a couple of stools in an easy way that delighted her.
‘This is very nice,’ she said. He had to lean close to hear her above the hubbub. ‘Again, I do apologize for being so late. This particular woman tells us she’s coming about one thing, and doesn’t leave until she’s asked my advice about four more.’
He laughed. ‘I hope you charge her separately for each one.’
‘Of course I don’t. She’s old and widowed and not very rich at all.’
‘It’s only her behaviour that’s a bit rich then.’
She smiled at his joke. He was looking at her appraisingly and she was secretly pleased. She’d not had time to dress as carefully for the evening as she’d have liked, but good old Barbara had only let her leave after she’d changed her day dress for an eau-de-nil evening gown that usually hung forgotten at the back of the cupboard, her best jacket and a pretty, embroidered gold drawstring bag. Not for the first time she was glad to have the motor. When Fergus had telephoned to finalize the arrangement, he’d offered to pick her up in a cab, but she’d told him that was ridiculous. ‘I’m used to going round by myself, I’ll have you know.’
‘I don’t doubt it. I thought I’d better ask, all the same,’ he’d said. ‘I don’t want you to think I’m that kind of man.’
‘What kind is that?’
‘I don’t know, the kind of tinker who doesn’t bring a lady to the theatre in his horse and carriage. In case she’s kidnapped on the way or swoons or something else bad happens to her.’
‘I assure you that I’m in no danger of any of those things, but it’s sweet of you anyway.’
He was, she had to admit, looking very handsome tonight in perfectly pressed evening dress, his eyes twinkling with humour. They talked of the play and what the possible outcome of the final act would be, and argued about the lead actor who Fergus thought rolled his eyes too theatrically and gave a passable impression of him doing so.
‘I don’t much care how melodramatic he is,’ Alice said with a sigh. ‘I’m simply enjoying being out for once, away from my work. Barbara was right, you know.’
‘Barbara?’
‘She made me come tonight. Said I was too caught up in my work.’
She noticed immediately a change in his expression and realized she’d upset him.
‘Oh, I didn’t mean that I didn’t come on my own account.’ She placed a hand on his gleaming black sleeve. ‘That was clumsy of me. Of course I did, and to see you. And it’s lovely of you to have got such good seats. I can see everything so well.’
Fergus’s smile was restored to his face, but not, she thought, with the same pure joy as before. Besoms and broomsticks, now she’d put a damper on the evening. She felt her face grow warm.
Fergus’s expression turned serious. ‘I would not dare comment on your life, Alice. All I’ll say is that when I saw you last week, I thought you seemed a bit worn down.’
‘I love my work, I do, truly. Every bit of it, even the nights when I’m snatched from sleep to go out into the cold and help some poor soul to hospital, or welcome a new baby into the world. It’s such a privilege. There are times I admit that I do feel low in energy or downcast, and you must have caught me at such a moment, but it’s not like that often.’
‘I know what you mean about the privilege. People put their trust in us, their lives in our hands. Some of the doctors, now, they think they’re gods and I see how that happens. You have to be confident in the job, it’s like a performance and there’s no room for mistakes. But if you forget that you’re also a servant or think you’re infallible then you can fail badly.’
Alice nodded eagerly. ‘And while you can’t allow your feelings to get in the way, you need to be true to your duty of care. Sometimes you have to harden your heart, but you must never let it turn to stone. I’m learning all that quickly, Fergus.’
‘You must look after yourself, or you’ll become tired out and no use to your patients. That’s why it’s so good to see you so bright tonight! May it be the first of many such evenings.’ Fergus clinked his glass on hers and downed the last of his drink as the bell rang to summon them back to their seats.
At that moment there was a commotion at the other end of the room, then a man’s cry went up, ‘Is there a doctor here?’
‘I don’t believe it,’ Fergus groaned. ‘Is it to be me or you?’
‘Me.’ Alice handed him her gold bag for safe-keeping and climbed down from her stool.
‘I’m a doctor,’ she called above the hubbub and enjoyed the astonished gazes of the throng as they parted to let her through to where an old gentleman lay crumpled on the floor amid the contents of his glass.
*
‘He’d only fainted in the heat,’ Alice explained to Barbara later on. ‘When he came round, he said he thought he’d died and gone to heaven to see a lady in an evening dress bending over him! Someone called him a taxi and we managed to see all of the second half.’
When she had crept back into the house it was close to midnight, but Barbara had appeared at the top of the stairs in a pink silk dressing gown, eager to hear how everything had gone.
Alice went to sit on Barbara’s bed. ‘I was awake reading,’ Barbara told her. ‘And no, nothing happened here while you were out. The only telephone call was for me. So, apart from your poor old gentleman, how was your evening?’
‘It was wonderful, Barbs, I’m so glad I went. The play was glorious. I‘ve never laughed so much.’
‘Mmm. And how was our handsome Irish doctor?’
‘Very charming and attentive.’
‘And?’
‘And nothing. I’m not ready for anything more. No, don’t look at me like that. It’s not as though it would do you any good. We’ve only recently set ourselves up here, and at considerable cost.’
‘I wasn’t suggesting we give any of this up, silly, it’s that I’d love to see you have more fun.’
‘I should like to go out more,’ Alice conceded with a sigh. Fergus had been a darling and she’d enjoyed the sparkle of the crowds and the bright lights, the hush in the theatre as the curtain rose. The play had been about a warring husband and wife who both had unrealistic expectations of the marriage. A common enough theme, but the freshness and humour, and the topical references, had made it come alive.
‘He’s suggested we go out to dinner next week.’
‘And you said yes, of course.’
‘I said I’d speak to you, and that it might not be possible.’
‘It jolly well will be. I can’t hold the fort every night, but there’s no reason why I shouldn’t occasionally. Apart from anything else, I can always invite my friends round.’
‘Of course you can.’ Alice yawned. ‘I’m suddenly feeling the need of my bed. Let’s hope nobody wants to be born tonight or anything else that can’t wait for the morning.’
She kissed her friend goodnight and went to bed, where she slept deeply and without dreams.