“MIND IF I use your shower?” Danny asked as he descended from the motor home ahead of Helen into Madison’s driveway. “I would love to have some good water pressure.”
“You’re welcome to use my bathroom...and even my guest room, if you like, Danny.” Madison’s hesitation was slight, but it was there nonetheless.
“That would be wonderful. I’m sick of that bed and that motor home,” he answered before Helen could politely decline.
Embarrassment scorched Helen’s face. If Danny weren’t injured, she’d dig an elbow into his side. Men could be so obtuse. You didn’t invite yourself to stay in someone else’s home—especially when their body language contradicted the reluctant invitation.
“We could get out of the monster home and back into our house much sooner if you’d agree to hire someone to finish the renovations instead of insisting on doing it all yourself.”
“I like tinkering, and I know how you want it done.”
“You can’t do it right now or in the foreseeable future, and I can easily explain what I want to a contractor. I explained it to you, didn’t I?”
Madison looked uncomfortable, making Helen realize she should’ve kept her mouth shut. Arguments between a husband and wife should be kept private.
“I’m sorry, Madison. Use her shower if you must, Danny, but we’ll sleep in your home on wheels.” Helen threw his earlier words back at him. “You claimed it’s the most comfortable mattress you’d ever slept on right after we bought it.”
“I’d rather stay with Madison.” Danny had a stubborn streak a mile wide, and he’d dug his heels in. His petulant tone told her she’d never win this argument.
She didn’t know about sleeping under Madison’s roof, but Helen wasn’t ashamed to admit she wouldn’t mind taking a look inside her home. The old country cottage looked more like something from an Americana calendar than the architectural masterpiece Andrew had bought.
Madison’s gaze followed a car slowly passing on the street. The occupants tooted the horn. Juggling the box her last patient had given her—in lieu of payment—she lifted her hand.
“Let’s get out of this hot sunshine.” Madison turned toward the house and Danny tottered along beside her.
“I’ll get our bags,” Helen grumbled to herself. She ducked back inside the vehicle, retrieved their suitcases and followed.
The wooden screen door slapped shut behind Danny as she descended the metal steps, and the familiar sound brought back memories of happier, simpler times. It reminded her of hot afternoons sipping lemonade and eating watermelon outside, of sticky fingers and smiling boys rinsing off in the water sprinkler. Back then Danny had had time for her and his sons. He hadn’t worked every possible hour.
But those days were gone. Her grandparents had passed away when the boys hit their early teens. Her grandmother had gone first, then her grandfather just a few weeks later—some claimed from a broken heart. The house had been sold. Nana and Pops had been her surrogate parents since her teens when her mother had grown tired of being a single parent and dumped Helen before taking off for parts unknown.
Maybe that was why Helen had bonded so strongly with Madison. Madison and her mother had butted heads just as much as Helen and hers. The difference was Madison had left by choice. Helen had been dumped like smelly garbage. But neither of them had seen their mothers again. As for Madison’s father... Well, at least she’d known who he was. Helen hadn’t.
She shook off the ugly memories and approached the porch. Two weathered white rockers swayed in the breeze. They, like the house, could use a fresh coat of paint. A few potted geraniums by the steps would be a nice touch, too...and maybe some Stargazer lilies and gardenias to scent the hot summer air and add color to the yard.
Not her problem.
She climbed the stairs, pausing at the top to take a good look at the countryside, including an old red barn and an attentive horse that looked as if he wanted to come out and play.
Madison opened the front door. “Come in.”
“Thank you for inviting us, but I don’t want to impose. We’ll stay in the motor home tonight if you’d prefer.”
“You’re welcome here, Helen.”
“I apologize for my little snit fit out there.”
“It’s okay. You’ve been under a lot of stress. Did Adam ask you to come for me?”
Dear heaven. How had she forgotten to call her only living son? “No. In fact, he doesn’t even know where we are. I need to tell him that he doesn’t need to make the flight. We left in such a rush I didn’t have a chance. If you’ll show me where we’re staying, I’ll set all this down and then give him a call.”
“This way.”
The front bedroom was small but homey. The hodgepodge collection of mismatched pieces was charming and fit together perfectly. It was worn, but dusted. She could tell from the knots and stitching that the log-cabin quilt covering the bed was homemade, not one bought at a box store or made overseas. The wooden floorboards creaked as she crossed them—another memory-evoking sound.
“This is very pretty, Madison.”
“Thank you. Some of the furniture came with the house. The rest I found in yard sales, then refinished.”
Madison’s home had warmth and heart—something Andrew’s designer showplace house had lacked. “Why didn’t you tell Andrew you preferred this simple decor?”
Madison briefly lowered her gaze. “I did. He wasn’t fond of vintage furniture. He called it ‘other people’s junk.’”
That sounded like him. Andrew had always preferred shiny and new things.
“If this is your style I can see why you were less than thrilled when Andrew surprised you with the house. At the time I thought you were ungrateful.”
“It was more than that, Helen. We couldn’t afford that big house or the furniture he bought. We had a budget and he wasn’t sticking to it.”
Helen had suspected as much, but Andrew had assured her he’d bring in extra business to his father’s practice to cover the large monthly payments.
“I’ll leave you to get settled. Danny wants to explore, but I’m trying to get him to rest first. I’ve parked him on the screened porch beneath the ceiling fan with a glass of lemonade. Join us after you’ve talked to Adam or stay inside out of the heat, if you prefer. The bathroom’s down the hall. Help yourself to anything you need.”
Madison pivoted and left Helen staring after her. Helen had forgotten how helpful and considerate her daughter-in-law had always been. Madison had been like the daughter she’d never had. She’d missed that closeness. She hadn’t realized how much until now.
Had the house being out of their budget caused the argument and put fury in Madison’s eyes at the graduation party? Or had it been the unplanned pregnancy? If Andrew had twisted Helen’s suggestion and forced Madison’s hand, what would happen if Madison ever found out Helen had unintentionally planted the idea? Would Madison forgive her? Or would she leave them in the lurch before Danny was ready to return to work?
No matter what, Madison could not find out about that long-ago conversation between Helen and Andrew—because Helen no longer wanted Madison to leave. She was good for Danny, and if she joined the practice, then maybe Danny would have time for something besides work. Helen missed Sunday dinners, lazy days with her husband, the drives in the country, the weekends by the lake or on the beach. She wanted them back. And Madison was the ticket to making that happen.
* * *
THE SOUND OF the motor home’s engine faded as the Drakes pulled away, leaving Madison stranded on Adam’s sidewalk.
She climbed the steps, trying to prepare herself for the encounter ahead. She liked to keep her emotions in a tidy box, but nothing about how she felt around Adam was logical or controlled. Around him she was an emotionally disorganized mess.
She lifted her hand to ring the bell, but the door opened before she could press the button. Her heart and lungs stalled then sprang back into action at double their regular rate—a result of Adam startling her. That was all—nothing to do with her being eager to see him.
The tingle in her fingertips and below her navel, combined with the anxious bumblebees-buzzing-through-her-veins sensation that had only gotten stronger as the motor home approached Norcross, called her a liar.
“I’m not pregnant,” she blurted to derail the feeling, then wished she’d shown more finesse. She tried to read his face. Was he relieved or torn the way she’d been? She couldn’t tell.
“When did you find out?”
Guilt needled her between the shoulder blades. “Wednesday.”
“Five days ago? Madison, why didn’t you let me know?”
His terse tone made her hackles rise. She should have. She knew that, but...but... Well, she hadn’t. “I was busy, and then your parents showed up unexpectedly. I’ve been entertaining them.”
“Since yesterday. A text would’ve sufficed.”
“Yes, I suppose. I’m sorry. I didn’t know what to say.”
“The same thing you just said.” He stepped back, opening the door to let her into the house, then he took her bags from her. “No cooler?”
“No time to pack one.”
He headed down the hall. She followed him into the guest room, resigning herself to two more nights of dancing around this crazy connection they had.
“When did your marriage turn sour?” Adam demanded.
This wasn’t a conversation she wanted to have, but judging from his determined expression and by the way he’d conveniently blocked the bedroom doorway, she wasn’t going to wiggle out of it easily. That didn’t mean she wouldn’t try. For his sake.
“Adam, it’s late and I’m tired. I thought we’d never get out of Quincey for all the neighbors dropping by on the pretext of bringing me things when they only wanted to check out your parents. Can we save this discussion for another time?”
Her life in Quincey would never be the same. But that was a worry she’d fret over later.
“I need to know how many lies Andrew told.”
Even she didn’t know that answer. “Please let it go. He was your brother. Your memories of him are all you have left.”
“What happened to your marriage, Madison?”
“You have no idea what you’re digging up.”
He leaned against the jam. “I’m not leaving until you talk. You had a plan, then it changed. How?”
The fight drained from her. She was tired. Tired of carrying the secrets that weighted her down like the old burlap feed sacks she used to help her father unload. Tired of running from the truth. Tired of Adam thinking the worst of her. Tired of covering for a man who’d betrayed her.
What was the worst that could happen? The Drakes would tell her to leave and never come back? Not finish out the time she’d promised Danny? That was what she’d wanted all along anyway, wasn’t it?
Wasn’t it?
She wasn’t sure anymore.
Adam’s opinion of her mattered—too much. She’d hoped—prayed—the crazy, wound-up sensation she experienced around him was only misplaced sexual attraction, but it was far more. Her reactions whenever he was near, her disappointment each time he hadn’t come to pick her up and the way he monopolized her thoughts when they weren’t together proved that. A woman didn’t experience highs and lows like that or a single-minded preoccupation for someone who didn’t matter.
But she’d get over it. Wouldn’t she?
She shoved back her hair and took a deep breath. “I had a plan to finish college and then vet school, setting myself up for a financially secure career. Then I met and fell in love with your brother.
“I tried to stick to my goals and begged Andrew to wait until I’d graduated to get married. But he was insistent and persuasive. I finally agreed to marry him, but only after he promised we’d wait until I was established in your father’s practice before we started our family. Five years. That was the plan.”
“Accidents happen.”
“Yes. They do. And I believed that’s what happened to me. I was going to make the best of it. But from the moment Andrew learned I was expecting he changed. He became controlling and demanding. His charming side vanished. He resented the time I spent at school instead of in Norcross, claiming we had limited time to be just us—a couple—before we were a family. But I was too close to graduation to quit. I apologized to him repeatedly because I thought I’d screwed up my birth control and that our problems were my fault. And no matter what I did, he wouldn’t let up about how I’d messed up ‘the plan.’ I felt like I couldn’t do anything right.
“Then I found out that my getting pregnant wasn’t an accident. Andrew had planned it.”
“What?”
“He’d had too much to drink at my graduation party and started bragging that he’d found a placebo that looked like my birth control pills and switched them out.” She waited for Adam to call her a liar.
“That’s why you were arguing.”
She nodded.
“Go on,” he said through clenched teeth.
“I was upset. I couldn’t believe he’d pull such a stunt when he knew why having a career was so important to me. On the way home he told me when and where he thought I’d conceived. He said there had to be something wrong with me for not wanting to stay home and raise our children—not just the one I was carrying but our future children, too. He wanted me to throw away seven years of education and my dreams and be a stay-at-home mom like Helen.”
“Why is a career so important to you?”
Yet another secret she’d carried. She’d only told Helen and Andrew. “My mother barely finished high school, and she’d never had a job. She wasn’t happy with my father, but she couldn’t leave him because she had no skills to support herself. She got her kicks with other men instead.” Bile burned her throat. “I had no clue until early my junior year in high school when I got sick at school and went home early. I caught my mother and a stranger in our guest room. I was horrified. I raced out to the fields and told my dad. He just shrugged and said not to worry about it, as long as she was at home with us every night.
“I hated them both for lying and letting my sister and I believe everything was all right—that we were a normal happy family.” She wrapped her arms around her middle and stared blindly out the window. “That day I swore I’d never be dependent on anyone or let myself get so miserable that I convinced myself cheating was an acceptable option.”
“What did you do?”
“I worked my butt off to get every scholarship and grant I possibly could. Once I left Lafayette I never went back. I’d lost all respect for my parents and I couldn’t stand to be under their roof.”
“That’s why you always came to our house for vacations instead of going home.”
“Yes.”
“It’s also why you pushed my mother to go back to school or get a job.”
She nodded.
“Andrew claimed you were trying to cause problems between our parents.”
Shocked, she faced him. “I would never do that. Danny and Helen had—have—a marriage I envy, the kind I wanted for Andrew and I. Sometimes I wonder if their strong relationship isn’t part of the attraction I felt for Andrew.”
Silence filled the room. Adam’s brow furrowed, but he wasn’t defending Andrew over the failure of her marriage the way she’d expected. Nor was he condemning her.
“Madison, do you know why I didn’t go into veterinary medicine?”
She shook her head.
“Andrew was excessively competitive. He couldn’t stand to be second best at anything, and his methods for getting ahead weren’t always...fair. From the stories I heard, you were outshining him at the office. My guess is that he sabotaged you to stop you.”
Shocked, Madison stared. “But I did my best because I wanted him to be proud of me. Why sabotage someone he claimed to love?”
“He loved himself first. The rest of us fell somewhere in line behind him. Luckily I had an epiphany in high school and decided not to compete with him. I chose a different career path and moved away from Norcross as soon as I could.”
“But you came back.”
“I came back for Mom. Dad doesn’t ever ask for favors. When he called and said Mom was in a depression and he couldn’t get her out of it or get her to talk to anyone, I dropped everything.”
Andrew had looked out for number one. Adam had put his family first. The last thing she needed if she was to resist the attraction she felt for him was yet another reason to admire him.
“Madison, I hired an accident investigator to look into the wreck.”
She was already on shaky ground. He couldn’t have knocked her more off-balance if he’d pushed her down. “What? Why?”
“Andrew’s and Daniel’s deaths weren’t your fault, and you need to know that.”
“But I was driving. We were arguing. I took my eyes off the road—” To tell him she wished she’d never married him and never conceived his child. But she couldn’t tell Adam that.
“The police report stated you were driving below the posted speed limit when you hit black ice and skidded off the pavement. My investigator said the wreck would’ve been survivable if the guardrail had functioned properly. But it failed. There are lawsuits pending against the company for similar accidents. You should probably file one, too, to get yourself a cushion to live on if you keep seeing patients for perishables. Andrew’s and Daniel’s deaths were a tragic accident—not negligence on your part.”
Chaos erupted in her brain. Six years’ worth of questions, doubts and recriminations bombarded her. “Are you sure?”
“I’m sure.”
Not her fault.
A lump rose in her throat, choking her. Her eyes burned. She would not cry. She’d cried gallons of tears already. She wrapped her arms around her middle and tried to hold on to her fraying composure.
“Madison?” Adam’s voice seemed to come from a great distance away.
Not her fault. Dizzy, she gulped in huge breaths.
She hadn’t killed her baby and husband.
* * *
MADISON’S PALLOR ALARMED Adam. “Madison, are you all right?”
She didn’t answer. In fact, she looked as if she wasn’t aware of him. Then she started shaking.
“Madison.” He gripped her shoulders and turned her. She looked at him blankly, then blinked.
“You’re sure their deaths weren’t my fault?” she whispered again with hope in her voice and eyes.
“Positive. The investigator said it should’ve been a property-damage-only incident. You did nothing wrong.”
“I thought—” She hiccupped in a breath. “And then your mother said— I believed she was right. I killed them both, and I couldn’t blame her for being sick at the sight of me, so I left.
“You’re right, Adam—I ran and I hid and I didn’t tell anyone about my past. Not even Piper and June, my closest friends, knew everything until you came and I had to explain, but now after your parents’ visit everyone knows.” The words fell over each other so quickly he struggled to decipher them.
She looked shattered without a vestige of color. Fearing she’d faint, he led her to the bed and sat, forcing her beside him. She perched on the edge, every muscle and sinew in her body as taut as an elevator cable.
This woman who cried over having to euthanize a stranger’s old, dying dog had been blaming herself for her own child’s death? He couldn’t imagine the hell someone that sensitive had gone through. Though he knew he shouldn’t, he took her into his arms. She resisted for a moment, then leaned into him. A sob, seemingly dredged up from deep in her soul, escaped, then she lost it, burying her face against his chest.
Minutes passed. Ten. Twenty. He cradled her, letting the storm of her tears wash over him. The quivers rocking her shook him to his core. He stroked her back, his fingers gliding over her hair in an attempt to soothe her. Madison had been there for every stray that crossed her path, but no one had been there for her—especially not his family, who’d called her one of their own.
A tornado of feelings tore through him. He felt protective and territorial—neither of which he’d experienced for a woman. But overshadowing both of those was anger. Andrew hadn’t deserved Madison, and his brother’s lies and cruel, manipulative games during the last year of his life had not only torn their family apart—he’d nearly destroyed the woman he was supposed to love above anyone else.
Adam gritted his teeth on the fury welling inside. If his brother was here tonight, Adam would do something he had never let Andrew provoke him into doing no matter how badly it had been deserved. He’d kick Andrew’s sorry ass for the way he’d treated Madison.
But that option wasn’t open. The only thing he could do was help Madison pick up the pieces of her life.