KYLE TASTED BELLA, felt her firm, warm flesh beneath his hands, but while everything in his body said, More please, his brain screamed, What are you doing?
And it wasn’t because she had all the appeal of a damp tissue. Her red-rimmed eyes and runny nose should have been a total turnoff. But whatever part of him was reacting to her, it wasn’t his body, which was what got him into trouble most of the time. And it wasn’t his brain, which was bombarding him with a thousand reasons why this was wrong.
All he knew was that he had to kiss her. It was an instinct as deep and inexorable as the need for warmth on a dark, cold night.
Bella tasted like salted caramel—likely from the granola bars and tears, his brain pointed out with ruthless logic. Their mouths fit together perfectly. Her tongue darted out briefly, testing, meeting his.
He slid deeper into the roomy sedan’s passenger seat, and she straddled his lap. Softly, then with increasing fervor, their lips met, parted, and crashed up against each other again, passion surging like the sea’s powerful tides. Her fingers raked through his hair as she pressed closer. He glided a hand along her hip. His fingers slipped beneath the hem of her top, touching the silky soft skin in the small of her back. He was instantly hard, and his hands clutched her waist.
She gave a soft moan and wiggled her bottom, grinding down.
He sucked in a breath. It was too much—too fast, too soon, too Bella. Blindly, he leaped out of the seat, dumping her from his lap as he swallowed a strangled groan. He nearly staggered to his locked knees as the tide of heat ripped over him. Gradually, the stars cleared from his eyes.
“Kyle?”
He trembled, every nerve in his body on high alert as he felt the damp evening air on his skin. He turned away from her, mortified.
“I’m sorry. We...we shouldn’t be doing this.” He gripped the corner of the car door and rounded the hood, hoping the dampness in the front of his pants didn’t show through. It was like the worst of his teenage years all over again.
Bella didn’t say anything. He couldn’t even look at her, but he knew she was watching him, confused and probably appalled. “I’ll drop you off at home,” he said, getting behind the wheel.
They didn’t speak on the ride back to her apartment, but the questions and regrets were as suffocating as the humidity. What kind of man would ravage Bella in the front seat of a car after the day she’d had? He knew better than to take advantage of a woman in an emotional state.
He was a horn dog. Worse than that, all things considered.
He could only hope the falling darkness would hide his shame.
* * *
IT WAS AMAZING how interesting ceilings were at three o’clock in the morning.
Bella could still taste Kyle, could still smell him and feel the imprint of his palms on her skin. She’d eaten, showered and lain in bed for nearly four hours, all while replaying that kiss. On the one hand, Kyle’s lips had managed to wipe out the day’s drama and worries. On the other hand, she now had a whole new set of issues to contend with.
How could he mess with her like that? If they’d gotten down and dirty in the backseat, at least it would’ve taken the edge off. But no. He’d left her riled up and panting for more, and hating herself for every stupid minute of it.
Not that it was entirely his fault, she supposed. Mostly, she was ashamed of the fact that she’d acted on her feelings at a vulnerable moment. What did he think of her throwing herself at him when she was still in shock over the day’s horrible events? He must think I’m an insensitive... She thought hard about the word she’d first learned from reading romance books. Wanton. Yeah. That sounded better than the only other word she could imagine people using.
Desperate to escape her thoughts, she covered her face with a pillow and squeezed her eyes shut. Her grandfather had a saying: emotions are like blood—the more you let them out, the weaker you got. Keeping yourself centered and levelheaded, containing your anger and fear—that was how you stayed strong, kept your opponents at bay.
Well, she’d certainly failed at that. If Fulvio had seen her bawling, he’d have used it as proof against her abilities and commitment as a fighter.
Would Kyle think the same? That she’d allowed herself to be compromised?
She pushed those self-defeating thoughts away, but her mind didn’t stray far from Kyle. She didn’t want to admit to herself that she’d been thinking about those lips since the day she’d arrived at Payette’s. Didn’t want to admit that the distant crush she’d had on him as a starstruck youth had turned into full-out lust the moment they’d touched. She was a professional, after all, and fighting meant a lot of full-body contact. Working with Kyle should’ve been an asexual exercise.
But things between them had changed. She’d learned Kyle was as skilled a kisser as he was a wrestler. She wondered what else he could teach her....
She turned over and sighed. Nothing, that’s what. She wasn’t about to give in to her libido. Not if it meant losing Kyle as a coach.
The following day, Kyle didn’t show up at Payette’s. Instead, Tito came with instructions from Kyle for Joe and Bella to practice a series of takedowns and submissions.
“Where is he, anyhow?” Joe asked as they stretched.
Tito shrugged. “Didn’t say. He left a message with Liz saying he’d be away for a few days.”
“Maybe that old car of his has to be junked and he’s in mourning,” Joe said on a half laugh.
For some reason, Bella didn’t find that funny. That car meant a lot to him. She couldn’t imagine he was quite that preoccupied with his convertible, though.
Perhaps he’d gone to check on Shawnese. Or maybe he was filing a complaint against Ryan. Thinking about her agent—ex-agent, she corrected—brought a sour taste to her mouth. She’d considered going to the authorities about Ryan, but there was a chance he’d sue or press charges against her, too. That wasn’t something she needed for her career. Maybe it was best to leave it alone.
For now, she had to focus on the fight. It was less than two weeks away, and she didn’t feel anywhere near ready. She couldn’t afford any more distractions.
Especially from Kyle.
* * *
KYLE STARED AT the steering wheel, willing his heartbeat to slow, his fingers to unclench from around the wheel. He’d been sitting in the parking lot at Payette’s for almost five minutes now in the stifling heat. If he didn’t get out of the car soon, he’d get heat stroke.
It’d been three days since that...thing had happened with Bella. Not to mention all the other ugliness of that single strange and terrible day. He chewed on the inside of his cheek. Was she laughing at him? Disappointed? Angry that he’d left her twisting in the wind? She’d probably figured he was avoiding her. That wasn’t entirely untrue...but it also wasn’t the whole truth. Even so, he couldn’t keep shirking his responsibilities to the gym.
When he walked in, Liz looked up and smiled lopsidedly. “The prodigal coach returns.”
“I had some things to take care of.” He didn’t need to explain himself. Things had to get done, and he knew no one would approve if he told them what he’d been up to.
“You weren’t out stalking Ryan Holbrooke, were you?”
He whipped his head up to stare at the receptionist.
“Bella told me.” The solemn look in Liz’s eyes indicated she knew the whole story. “I never liked him—he’s a serious creep.”
“I should’ve banned him a long time ago. If he comes in, you scream for me or the guys. He’s not likely to show his face here, but he’s not welcome.”
“Yes, sir.” Her reply rang with approval.
He was barely at his desk for five minutes before the phone rang and Kyle picked up. Liz said, “Your sister, Jessica, on line one.”
Now what? His shoulders ratcheted tight, sending pain through his neck and scalp. It’d been months since he’d spoken to Jess, and even then, their conversations had been entirely about Dad’s will. Maybe she was calling about Mom—he hadn’t heard from her lately, either. Palms sweating, he picked up the line.
“Hey, squirt,” she greeted cheerfully. “How’s it hanging?”
“What’s wrong? Is it the inheritance?”
“Inheritance? What are you talking about? We took care of all that. Nothing’s wrong.” She sounded genuinely confused. “I called to say hello. I’m in New Orleans for a business conference. I thought we could meet up for dinner and drinks.”
His muscles relaxed and he let out a breath. “Jesus, you scared me.”
Jess’s laugh was boisterous and full throated—and always great to hear. She hadn’t laughed much as a youth. “It’s fabulous here in the French Quarter. Why haven’t you invited me to stay here before?”
He massaged the back of his neck. “I’ve been busy.”
“Not too busy for dinner, I hope.”
He hedged, searching for an excuse. “Hang on a sec.” He put her on speakerphone as he moved around the room, searching for something to occupy his hands. He picked up the clipboard with the day’s schedule and flipped through it noisily. “I’ve actually been out of the office for the past few days, and I have this important client I’ve been neglecting. She has a fight coming up and I need to work with her....”
“Well, a fighter has to eat, right? Bring her along.”
“Oh, I don’t know if she—”
“Remember how you used to fight with Dad about how important R & R was?”
He blew a breath through his nostrils. Bringing up Dad was not going to sway him. “I’ve got responsibilities to her—”
“Hey, don’t let me interfere with your social calendar,” Bella piped up from the doorway. “You talking to your sister?”
Kyle stilled. The sight of her made his chest tighten. She wore a green-and-white tank top, and her trunks were only a couple of inches above the knee, but it was more skin than he’d seen up to now. Her bronzed, muscled shoulders gleamed with a sheen of sweat. He waved her—and his unwanted libido—off.
“Was that her?” Jessica asked. “She sounds cute.”
He glanced at Bella’s retreating back. “I guess. If you like that sort of thing,” he said before he could censure his thoughts.
“My brother the Lothario is ambivalent about a woman’s looks?”
He lowered his voice. “I don’t have the luxury to think about her like that.”
“Ooh, touchy. So you like her, huh?”
Heat shot into his face. “No.”
“Yes, you do. You’re never this serious when it comes to women.”
“Things change.” She didn’t know about Karla—all that had happened after Dad’s funeral. “Anyhow, she’s not my type.”
“Whatever you say. So how about dinner?”
“I can’t. I have a ton of work to catch up on.” That wasn’t even a lie.
Jess gave a melodramatic sigh. “Oh, well. I guess I’ll have to eat all by my lonesome.”
“That never used to be a problem.”
“Pre-op, sure. But now...” She sighed again. Kyle couldn’t help but feel a little guilty for not being a better brother. He only had himself to blame, too. Dad had forbidden everyone from even speaking to Jess, but Kyle could’ve called. Could’ve emailed pictures and kept in touch. But he hadn’t. Jess was Jess and...well, things were different now.
“I’ll be here all week,” his sister said. “Promise you’ll come see me?”
“I’ll do my best.” After he took down her number, he hung up and slumped in his chair. He was shaking out two Tylenols from a bottle when Bella entered.
“I heard what you said.” She leaned against the doorjamb. “Am I really that important to you as a client?” Her lips slanted, parallel to one skeptically arched eyebrow.
“Of course you are.” Were they really talking about this? He’d been away three long days, and she was acting as if nothing had happened. Not Ryan, not Shawnese, not that kiss...or the way he’d—
“Come on. You don’t have to lie.”
“I’m not.”
“Humph.” She didn’t comment further but crossed her arms, pushing up her breasts. He shifted in his seat, remembering exactly how they’d felt pressed against his chest. “You know my fight’s next Friday, right?”
He nodded.
“Good. Because considering no one else has any fights as close as mine, I was hoping to shamelessly monopolize your time.”
Was that a threat?
He ground his teeth. Did she think he owed her something? That what they’d shared was more than a momentary lapse in judgment?
He fumed silently. He knew he’d regret that kiss.
They should sit down and talk about what had happened. He should lay it out for her, let her know he’d been...what? Blind with lust?
He gripped the edge of his desk, his thoughts running away from him. Calm down. He was freaking out for no reason. He was a professional, dammit, and he’d show her that was all he would be with her—professional.
“C’mon.” He got up from his desk. “We need to nail your mounts.”
“I know you’ll be able to help me there,” she said with a smirk, and followed him out.