The principal feature of your personality?
Did you get my last name?
The quality you appreciate most in another man?
A sense of humor.
And in a woman?
A warm welcome.
Your biggest defect?
I tend to brood. But my secondary defects are every bit as impressive.
When was the last time you cried?
Just a few days ago, while watching a seventies tearjerker, L’ultima neve di primavera (The Last Snows of Spring), on a local channel. Do you remember it? The tagline on the posters was just appalling: . . . Papà, it’s a shame I’ll never see you again.
I don’t believe you.
That’s smart.
Who’s the one person you met who changed your life?
I didn’t remember that this was going to be one of the questions.
*
Excuse me?
Nothing, forget it.
Recurring dream?
I’m in an old apartment, I relax and get comfortable, then suddenly I remember that I sold the place and I’m filled with anguish at the thought that the new owners may come back from one moment to the next.
The person you’d summon back to life?
Massimo Troisi.
Favorite singer?
Sting.
The song you whistle most often in the shower?
“Oh! Susanna.”
Personal cult film?
The Accidental Tourist.
Favorite actor?
William Hurt.
Favorite actress?
Emmanuelle Béart.
If you had several million euros?
I’d be much better off.
Favorite dish?
Spaghetti with spunzilli and basil.
Spunzilli?
Cherry tomatoes.
Favorite drink?
Amarone.
Hardly an unpretentious wine.
Now that I have several million euros in the bank, what should I drink, Tavernello?
Favorite city?
New York.
Your first love?
A total bitch.
The television show you love most?
The satirical variety show Magazine 3.
The transgressions you’re most inclined to forgive?
Misdemeanors and petty felonies.
That’s exactly the answer a lawyer would give.
I didn’t feel like coming up with a moralistic answer.
Favorite song?
Fabrizio De Andrè’s “Verranno a chiederti del nostro amore.”
What would you be doing if you hadn’t become a lawyer?
I’d be a rock guitarist.
Why, do you play the guitar?
No.
*
In that case, sorry?
Will you stop making comments about my answers?
What’s your motto?
If you can’t seize the moment, just take a little extra time.
What kind of motto is that?
Listen, are we done?
I have the impression that you’ve given me a series of nonsensical answers.
Sorry about that.