If losing weight was really that easy, everyone would be thin

‘If not-smoking was really that easy, and all it took was just to decide I won’t smoke another cigarette (ever again), there wouldn’t be any smokers.’

‘If not-drinking was really that easy, and all it took was just to decide I won’t drink alcohol (any more), there wouldn’t be any alcoholics.’

Just because something is easy said, it doesn’t mean it’s easy done. The physical aspect of losing weight is actually really simple, but it’s often turned into something incredibly complicated, and a lot of people seem to spend their whole lives on an epic quest to find the holy grail of the miracle diet that will help them lose weight permanently.

Some pearls of fat-logic wisdom are comparable to telling an alcoholic he can’t become a teetotaller just by stopping drinking, because not-drinking will increase the amount of alcohol in his blood. So, he should drink at least three beers in the morning, but definitely not after 1.00 pm, and it has to be dark beer, unless his blood group is O or AB, in which case it has to be lager. Also, he must have a blood alcohol level of at least 2 parts per mil, or his alcohol metabolism will be ruined, and he’ll become permanently drunk.

All this pseudo-scientific nonsense is seductive, though, because the more complex and complicated achieving our desired aim is seen to be, the less it feels as if it is in our own hands. But the hard truth is that weight gain comes from eating too much, and it hurts to admit that at first. It’s often easier for us, and those who love us, to soften that unpleasant blow with statements like, ‘You’ve probably been eating too little — and now your body’s gone into starvation mode.’ (Which basically means, ‘You haven’t failed! Quite the opposite: you were too good!’) It might be nice to hear such well-meant words of comfort at first, but in the longer term they just lead to frustration and desperation, because they effectively stand in the way of change.

Since I started actively paying attention to it, I’ve realised how rarely people who are frustrated by their failed attempts to lose weight are directly faced with the truth. Yesterday, for example, I came across a thread in a forum in which a woman was saying she ate very little and still hadn’t lost any weight for months. These were the first four responses:

If you consume far less than 1000 kcal per day for an extended period of time (and as far as I can tell that’s the case with your eating habits), your metabolism will go into starvation mode. It’s as simple as that. [58 upvotes]

It sounds like your metabolism has reached zero point, which doesn’t surprise me given the amount you’re eating. [61 upvotes]

You’re eating way too little. No wonder your metabolism’s gone down the drain. [44 upvotes]

Maybe you’re not eating enough? […] Your body needs at least 1250 kcal to function properly.

Then came the obligatory comment about the possibility of an underactive thyroid. These are the sorts of responses I see almost every time someone describes this kind of problem.

Responses along the lines of ‘you’re eating too much’ usually come in for hefty criticism and are dismissed as ‘mean’ or ‘stereotyped’. In truth, the forum-poster who couldn’t lose weight after months of ‘reduced eating’ was probably fooling herself and eating more than she thought. Persuading her that she needed to eat (even) more was the surest way to successful weight gain.