8

Emotions flitted across Trevor’s face. Had she said something wrong? Maybe he was sensitive about how old his parents were when he was born, but she couldn’t imagine why.

“Here we go, two lasagnes with Caesar salad and garlic toast.” The waiter set the loaded, steaming plates onto the table. “Can I get you anything else?” He directed his question and attention to Hayley, along with a wink.

She averted her eyes and shook her head. “No, thanks.” She didn’t look up until she heard his footsteps fade into the general restaurant noise. Then she peeked at Trevor. Would he want to say a blessing first?

No, he’d already picked up his fork. “Hope you’re hungry.”

Hayley inhaled and smiled. “I am, and this smells wonderful.”

The only conversation for the next few minutes was appreciative comments about their delicious dinner. Hayley glanced up several times, but Trevor seemed deep in thought as he ate, his attention fixed on his food. Or maybe she’d upset him. Maybe her questions offended him.

She chewed and swallowed a tangy bite of salad. “Nice,” she murmured.

“Pardon?"

For a second, all rational thought fled as his stormy gray eyes locked on hers. “Um…the salad. It’s really good—the perfect amount of dressing.” She stifled a groan. Witty conversationalist, she wasn’t. How not to impress a date.

“It is good, isn’t it?” He grinned. “Best in town.”

Maybe he hadn’t noticed her awkwardness. He dug into what was left of his pasta and held up his loaded fork. “How do you like the lasagne?”

“Delicious.” She dabbed her mouth with her napkin. “Thank you.”

He lowered his fork back onto his plate and leaned forward. He seemed to study her for a moment, and she fidgeted with the napkin in her lap. Was she wearing a blob of tomato sauce? She quickly wiped her mouth again, just in case.

“May I ask you something personal?” His low voice rumbled, soothing and exciting her at the same time.

“Um…sure.” How personal? The bite she’d swallowed rolled into a hard lump.

“When we met on the plane, you seemed…I don’t know…almost remote. Not rude or anything, but you seemed to be…in a lot of pain, and not just physically.”

Hayley gulped. Don’t ask why. Please don’t.

“But tonight you’re different. More confident and carefree.” His quick smile flashed deep dimples. “When we talked on the phone last night, I wasn’t sure I’d reached the right woman.”

Relief swept away Hayley’s apprehension, and she relaxed. She could do this. “You’re right. I’d been through a rough time that included a car accident, so any kind of travel brings back some of the trauma. And when we hit turbulence, the rod in my leg…”

Trevor sat back, his brow puckered. “No wonder. But you’re feeling better now?”

Hayley took a deep, slow breath. How to explain? “I’m still recovering physically, but I’m much better emotionally. Spiritually.” She sensed his withdrawal but plunged on before her courage failed. “The accident was my fault, and I’ve been carrying a huge load of guilt ever since. But my friends helped me realize Jesus paid for what I did. I have a lot to learn, but already I feel lighter.” She tried to figure out the expressions flitting across Trevor’s face. “That probably didn’t make any sense.”

Trevor closed his eyes, and when he looked at her again, their turbulence tugged at her sinking heart.

She’d offended him. She opened her mouth, not sure what she should say, but he held up a hand, his face unreadable.

“I’m glad you’re feeling better. If faith helps, good. For you.”

~*~

Was there some kind of faith epidemic going on? First Carlos, and now his first date in months. Both excited about Jesus. Trevor wanted to walk away, but his mother had taught him better manners than that. Besides, there had to be more to Hayley’s story, and his curiosity was piqued. But he could wait. “So, about Toronto…Did you like living there?”

One side of Hayley’s mouth quirked. Shadows crossed her features, and he wondered what those memories were that pulled her lips downward.

She sighed, looked out the dark window and back at him. “It has its good points. Lots to do, always. I used to love the busyness, the noise, all the people. Maybe I used it to drown out my loneliness.” She tilted her head and seemed to study him. “If a big city is what you want, I think you’ll like Toronto.”

I used it to drown out my loneliness. Those words resounded in his heart. He swallowed hard and grabbed at the next sane thought. “Do you know much about Lowrider Cycles?”

“Not really. I went there a couple times years ago with a guy I knew.” Her mouth twisted, making him wonder. “It was big, the guys were loud, lots of colourful language, and the bikes looked amazing. That’s really all I remember about it.”

That fit with his visit there. He’d sensed an intense competitiveness too, that attracted and repelled him. His head began to ache as his decision twisted his mind. Why did it have to be so complicated? And what had he expected of this date? She’d draw him a picture of his future? Might as well make the best of the evening, get to know this fascinating woman. He pushed his plate aside and leaned his elbows on the table. “Let’s forget Toronto for now. How long do you plan to be in Saskatoon?”

A smile appeared and disappeared from her face. “I’m not sure. I haven’t planned very far ahead. Just taking one day at a time.”

What had she said on the plane about her time at the University of Saskatchewan? Memory clicked. “You said you were studying accounting when you were here before. Is that your goal?”

Hayley shrugged as she traced the edge of her glass. “It was, but I don’t know anymore.” She shook her head. “I sound hopeless, don’t I? But so much has happened, I’m not the same person I was a year ago.”

Now that sounded interesting. Did he dare ask what had happened, or would it make her withdraw again? Was the accident she’d mentioned so life-changing? And what if she took his interest as a reason to preach about Jesus the way Carlos did?

Curiosity won. Trevor leaned forward. “You don’t sound hopeless, just confused. Trust me, I understand. But I’d like to know what happened. What were you like before, and what changed you?”

She stared out the window again for several heartbeats. Unreadable expressions flitted across her reflected face. Then she closed her eyes, took a deep breath, and exhaled through pursed lips. When she turned back to him, Hayley’s eyes seemed a deeper green than before, and lines had appeared between her eyebrows. “I won’t bore you with the whole sorry tale, but I wasn’t a nice person. Totally self-centered, out for a good time no matter who got hurt. And people did.” A spasm etched lines between her eyebrows. “I have a lot of regrets.”

Her obvious pain burned his heart. “Listen, you don’t have to tell me…”

She shook her head. “No, you asked, and I want to explain. The main reason I came to Saskatoon was to spend time with Dave and Lydia. He was my pastor when I was here before, and he and his wife are the most caring people I’ve ever met. They don’t care about your past. Their home and their arms are always open to anyone in need. And I need it.”

Trevor squirmed. Hayley stretched her hand across the table and placed it on his. A tingle shot up his arm, and her eyes widened. Had she felt it too?

“I won’t preach at you.” She smiled. “At least not tonight. All I’ll say is that God’s love, through Dave and Lydia, is changing me. I’m learning forgiveness is possible. And it makes all the difference.” She pulled her hand away and leaned back.

Trevor missed its warmth and power to distract from her words. His gut churned. It must be some sort of conspiracy, all this talk about God and forgiveness wherever he turned. He grabbed his water glass and downed its contents as though to drown out the effect of her words. He set his glass down with a thump, and Hayley shrank back.

“Sorry.” He pulled up his sleeve and glanced at his watch. “I’ve got work tomorrow…”

Hayley blushed. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to…” She ducked her head and scooted her chair back.

Shame flooded Trevor and burned his face. She’d only answered what he’d asked. “Wait, Hayley. Would you like a cup of coffee or something? We don’t need to go yet. I’d still like to hear what you think about the job in Toronto. I could use an impartial opinion.”

Hayley sighed, and the wistfulness of the sound shamed him even more. But her expression cleared, and she scooted her chair toward the table again.

“All right.” She leaned her elbows on the table and propped her chin on her palms as she studied his face. “You obviously care a lot about your parents, and you don’t want to leave them when they need you.”

Trevor nodded as the weight of his responsibility settled onto his shoulders.

“But you want to grow in your career, and that can only happen in Toronto. Right?”

Was she right? If he knew the answer to that question, he’d know what to do. He rubbed his chin, and part of his brain registered thankfulness he’d taken the time to shave before this date. “I do want to expand my custom motorcycle business, but I don’t know if I have to be at Lowrider for that. There’s my problem. My parents or my career—how do I choose?”

One side of Hayley’s mouth lifted, but her eyes held only sympathy. “You’ve got a tough decision to make. I wish I had the solution for you.” Her head tilted. “What do your parents say?”

Trevor gazed at the dining room’s ceiling as recent conversations replayed. “They want me to follow my heart. And they’re praying.” A trace of bitterness had crept into his voice, and he struggled to restrain it. “If I could find someone to help Mom until she heals and a guy to assist Dad with chores, I could leave with a clear conscience.”

Hayley’s face brightened. “Dave and Lydia know lots of people. They might know the perfect ones to help your parents. Do you want me to ask?”

Church people. Trevor’s jaw clenched as he considered. Not his first choice, but his folks would welcome like-minded people. And they’d certainly helped enough families through the years. Maybe it was time for the tide of giving to turn back. They might not want assistance, but it could be the answer. He’d be free to leave and follow his dream.

Hayley’s fingers played a rhythm on the tablecloth, and the silent movement caught his attention. The pink bloom on her cheeks when she realized he’d noticed stirred a warm glow deep in his chest and made his fingers want to trace the curve of her rosy cheeks.

Concentrate. Don’t think about her, think about her suggestion. It might be the solution he needed. Trevor cleared his throat. “That’s a good idea.” Hope for a good resolution swept over him, and he grinned. “I knew there was a reason I couldn’t quit thinking about you.” Heat rushed up his neck. “I mean…thank you.”

Hayley ducked her head, but not before he saw a sparkle in her eyes. She made a show of looking at her watch, and when she faced him again, her lips twitched upward. “You’re welcome. But it is getting late. We should go, and I’ll talk to Dave and Lydia. I’ll call you with their suggestions. Is that OK?”

“Absolutely.” A little thrill shot through him. He knew a phone call wouldn’t be enough. He wanted to see her again.

She gathered her coat. Trevor stood and held out his hand, a silent request. She smiled at him, handed him the heavy garment, and turned her back to him, waiting.

Trevor stared at her spiky red hair, the delicate curve of her neck, and her thin shoulders. His gaze travelled down to the swell of her narrow hips. She turned, questions in her eyes, and embarrassment turned his movements jerky as he held her coat open. She slipped her arms into the sleeves, and he pulled the silk-lined coat onto her shoulders. His hands didn’t want to let go. He leaned a little closer and breathed in her scent. Something fresh and flowery. Reminded him of his mom’s flower garden.

Hayley turned, and her eyes widened. She took a step back. “Thank you for this evening, Trevor.” Her voice wavered.

Was that fear in her eyes, or something else?