‘We’re in trouble, I won’t deny it.’ Esther Ward was clearly agitated, her bony fingers plucking at the frayed leather of the desk-top, and a nervous look in her unusually penetrating blue eyes that sent a shiver through the man standing before her. ‘Richard blames me, I know it. They all blame me. It’s the chance they’ve been waiting for. I know what they’re saying… “Only men understand the complexities of business”, that’s what they’re saying. “When a woman tries to think like a man, no good will come of it”.’
Thumping her small fist on the desk, she spat the words out. ‘Fools! Pompous fools! They know as well as I do that it has nothing whatsoever to do with who heads a company. All around us development opportunities are drying up. There’s an acute shortage of good land. Money is harder to come by, and all in all it’s a depressing time. Even Richard, with all his fancy ideas and determination, can’t stop the company from going under.’ She chuckled. It was a most unpleasant sound. ‘He deserves what’s coming to him. He has a few more shocks coming his way yet. Fool that he is! It won’t be only the company he loses.’
Seeming not to have heard her last remark, Tom Reynolds spoke bitterly. ‘I knew there were problems,’ he said, ‘but I thought things were beginning to look up?’ She had not yet spoken the words he dreaded, but he sensed they were imminent.
Esther shook her head, oblivious of the stray wisp of hair that fanned to and fro across her forehead; hair that had once been a soft shade of brown, but which now was streaked iron grey. Her features had not softened with the passing of almost three years; if anything her face was more chiselled and her blue eyes harder. She regarded the man for a while; the wiry frame and sharp shrewish expression, the startling white hair and eyes which, in a certain light, seemed more pink than brown. Tom Reynolds had been a loyal and useful ally but now his usefulness was almost at an end. And yet she was reluctant to let him go. She saw him as a reflection of herself, devious and cunning, her partner in many a conspiracy; the most successful of which had been the manipulation of that slut of a girl in Tyler Blacklock’s lodging house. She gloated inwardly at the memory. So easy! So satisfying. Not only had her clever plan discredited the young man whom Beth had set her heart on, but in the process had driven Richard’s daughter to her knees.
She knew how Beth had gone to the lodging house on the night when her own father disowned her; how she had run to her lover only to be turned away from there broken-hearted when the girl claimed that Tyler was the father of her own mythical child. There was also the unexpected but most gratifying development of the girl’s jealous lover and his mate beating Tyler within an inch of his life. Esther could not have planned that particular episode better if she had intended it.
When she learned from her son that Beth and Tyler were never reunited, Esther was beside herself with pleasure. There was a hatred for Beth within her; a hatred that spanned more than Beth’s own lifetime. It delighted her to think that the girl had gone into the night, alone and unloved and growing with child. Indeed, it occurred to Esther that Beth could well be dead by now. No matter. It was no more than she deserved. If she had come to a pitiful and desperate end, this woman for one would not be sorry.
Now another image raised itself, making her inwardly fume. If Beth had got her just rewards, Tyler Blacklock had carved himself a very different destiny. Against all odds, he had emerged from the gutter to haunt her! Over the years he had not only made himself a small fortune, but in the process gained something of a respectable reputation. While he rose in stature, the Ward Development Company suffered crippling misfortunes, until now its back was to the wall, and Esther Ward was a desperate woman. If Tom Reynolds was devastated by her next words, it was no more than she was herself. ‘I’m afraid if things don’t soon improve, you may have to find another employer.’
‘What other employer?’ The words exploded from him. ‘You’ve just said yourself that times are hard in the development industry. There’s not one single company taking on. They’re laying off more like. Every street corner tells its own story. You know that!’ He had awful visions of himself walking the streets, demeaning himself to look for work. In his wildest nightmares he had never thought it would come to this. And it wouldn’t, by God! Not while he had a canny bone in his body.
‘What would you have me do, then?’ She thrust back the chair and strode round the desk, her two hands locked together and her whole figure trembling with rage. ‘There’s no money, damn you. Do you hear what I’m telling you… there is no money!’
He smiled now, and facing her boldly, said quietly ‘You conveniently forget, I think. It is I who am handling the sale of the lease on the office premises. And, if my memory serves me right, you stand to rake in a tidy sum on that. Also, have you forgotten the lucrative deal which I again masterminded on that commercial property north of the Thames?’ He could have gone on, reminding her of his own incredible bargaining skill, and revealing his knowledge of certain holdings still owned by the company, though truth to tell they were neither large nor especially lucrative.
To Tom Reynolds’ mind, there were two causes for the rapid downfall of the company. One was Esther herself, who had never been accepted into what was essentially a man’s world, and who, in her desperate efforts to prove them all wrong, had made one too many a mistake. Unfortunately the damage was already done by the time Richard was fully recovered, and in spite of his commendable efforts to rescue what was left of the business he had built from his own sweat, it was far too late. The other cause of the present crisis was Ben, a man of few principles, whose only view of life was through the bottom of a tankard, riddled as he was with guilt and arrogance.
‘You see, I know there is money in the coffers,’ Reynolds reminded his employer. ‘I do hope you’re not working up to telling me that you won’t be able to pay me what I’m due? That would be very foolish of you.’ The threat was unmistakable. ‘I have no intention of seeing my dues gambled away by your wastrel of a son.’ Increasingly, he realised with a certain satisfaction that this was a family of shame and scandal. So far, Esther Ward had manage to keep the scandal contained to a certain degree, but he wondered how much longer it could all be brushed under the carpet.
Enraged that he should take it on himself to tell her the state of her own business, and bristling at the manner in which he spoke of her precious son, Esther said sharply, ‘Whatever is or is not in the coffers is nothing whatsoever to do with you! You’re an employee, nothing more, and maybe not even that for very much longer. You would do well to remember your place.’ Dismissing him with a gesture, she began walking towards the door which she meant to bang closed behind him. When she realised he had no intention of following her, she paused and jerked round her head, staring at him with those glittering blue eyes. ‘Get out,’ she hissed.
‘Oh, you want me to leave, do you?’ he asked with a devious smile, at the same time drawing a large scroll from inside his waistcoat. ‘Surely not. At least, not until you run your eye over what came my way this very morning.’ Ignoring her repeated instruction for him to get out, he unrolled the scroll and began spreading it over the desk, using the paperweight and penholder to secure its curling corners. Still, she did not move. Undeterred, he kept his gaze averted, saying quietly, ‘I have something here which may yet put the company back on an upward spiral.’ When still she made no move, he chuckled and made as if to put the document away again, pausing when he saw out of the corner of his eye that she was returning to the desk, albeit hesitantly.
‘What is it?’ she asked suspiciously, curiosity getting the better of her. In a moment she was beside him and leaning forward, her narrowed eyes poring over the detailed plans, and excitement growing within her. The plans showed a warehouse of enormous proportions. However, it was not the warehouse itself that was of interest, but the extensive parcel of land on which the building was situated. Furthermore, the details showed that the building was derelict, and permission was already secured for it to be demolished. Added to which, the entire parcel of land, totalling some fifty acres in all, was earmarked for residential development, or commercial enterprise.
‘What do you think?’ Tom Reynolds was utterly captivated with himself. ‘Clever of me to acquire such information, don’t you agree?’ Then without disclosing how – if he had the money to proceed on his own, he would not now be displaying that same information on Esther’s desk – he pressed her for a response. ‘Of course, if you’re not interested, there are those who would snap my arm off to get at this piece of land.’
‘Have you shown this to anyone else?’
‘I’m astonished that you should even think such a thing!’ He sounded suitably offended.
‘Hmm.’ Esther turned her head and glanced up at him, her blue eyes alight with suspicion. At length she said with a devious manner to match his own, ‘And I’m astonished that the thought had not occurred to you. No matter. Either you have not shown these plans elsewhere, in which case I owe you an apology… or you have touted them round, and the fools can’t see what’s in front of them.’
A fever grew inside him as he gazed on her. Esther was no beauty, but she had a certain handsomeness about her, a particular wickedness he had not seen in other women. Wickedness excited him. Esther excited him. She was the reason he had remained with the Ward company, even after he was made to suffer the humiliation of having his wages paid by a woman. Time and again, that woman had shown herself to be as scheming and ruthless as any criminal-minded rogue he had ever come across; with the exception of his good self, of course. ‘I can see I don’t need to explain how this parcel of land is only a few hundred yards from the newly designated railway lines. This is a rare opportunity to acquire a most valuable asset.’
‘I can see that for myself,’ she reminded him, but suddenly her manner was more subdued, her words more cautious. ‘But it’s a long-term investment and, as I’ve only just explained, I haven’t got that kind of capital. Besides, it won’t come cheap, I’m thinking. There’ll be others who see exactly what you and I see. And no doubt they will have the capital to take advantage of it.’
‘You have the capital.’
‘Not enough. Besides, I have a house to run, and my husband’s medical expenses. We have outstanding wages and other debts that must be met. Even with the few remaining assets, there is very little margin to work on. I dare not spend another farthing, and it would be suicide for me to go to the bank, even if Richard agreed, which he won’t.’ She stopped to peruse the plans once more, a greedy glint in her eyes. ‘It would rankle, though, if it went to one of our rivals. And I do believe I still have some influence with my husband.’ She stared at Reynolds. ‘All the same, it is long-term. As I say… going for this land could cost me everything.’ She looked at the man, waiting for his reassurance. She was not disappointed.
In a hoarse whisper that betrayed his obsession with the idea, he told her, ‘If it was me, I’d beggar myself to acquire it.’
Not for the first time, his manner alarmed her a little. She needed more time – time to think, time to weigh up the consequences. ‘I don’t know,’ she mused aloud, stroking the palm of her hand up and down her throat. ‘It would not be easy to raise the capital needed,’ she said at length. ‘I would be forced to deposit certain deeds with the bank. You realise that if I’m unsuccessful, they will foreclose and we’ll be paupered.’ Suddenly, she saw the folly of it all. ‘No.’ Shaking her head, she said, ‘Richard would never take the risk, and I’d be a fool to even consider it.’
‘You would be a fool not to!’ She had unwittingly touched a nerve, sending his memory back over the years, to when he was a young man. For the briefest and most uncomfortable moment, he was made to think of the father he’d left behind in the North of England, a man just widowed and with a stepson whom he disliked intensely. Tom Reynolds remembered how he had quarrelled with his father, a quarrel much like the one he was leading up to with Esther Ward.
He could hear his father’s words now: ‘Thomas Arnold Reynolds… if you walk out on me, there will never again come a day when you’ll be welcome in my house.’ Fearful that this might well be his last chance to secure his own future, he persisted, ‘Don’t be afraid to strike out, Esther. In this world, you have to grab what you want, before somebody else does. Besides, how do we know the sale will be well attended? Not everyone is as perceptive as you and me. Not everyone will have seen the real value of that land.’
Having worked himself into a highly nervous state, he clenched his fists against his sides, saying in a grating voice, ‘My own father lacked the courage when it came right down to it… I begged him to strike out when land was there for the taking, but he was a small thinker… a loser. I have no time for losers!’ There was bitterness in his voice, and a degree of loathing.
Encouraged by the curiosity in her expression, he drove the argument on. ‘What’s the alternative? Will you sit tight in your little kingdom, and watch it crumbling all around you? The office will be gone soon. You’ve already given notice to the work-force, though you haven’t paid them their dues. Most of your capital is spoken for, and the creditors are closing in. Think about it. The way things are, you might struggle on for a few months. A year maybe. But you’re bound to go down eventually. You must take this opportunity Esther,’ he urged. Afterwards, you can sit back and watch the investment grow handsomely, before you offer it out to the highest bidder and make a killing. What have you got to lose?’
There was a long painful silence while she deliberated on his words. There was never any question in her mind. Some time back, when the warning signs were becoming clearer and Richard was incapacitated, she had been cunning enough to transfer certain holdings into her own name. These represented a tidy sum, not a great fortune but enough for her to be comfortably off. If it came to it, she would sell up and move away, taking Ben with her. As for Richard, he had been a thorn in her flesh for too long now. ‘We’ll see,’ she said cautiously. ‘We’ll see.’ And with that vague promise, she bent her head to study the plans.
If anything was growing at an alarming rate, it was the network of railway lines running out of the centre of London to outlying suburbs. Any land remotely near such construction held unlimited potential. Not only would any subsequent residential development be wonderfully placed to take advantage of the new route into the heart of the city – thereby making the houses attractive to those whose business was in the city centre – but past experience had shown more often than not that the railway barons could well pay a fortune for any land they needed. ‘We might be on to something here,’ murmured Esther, her scheming mind leaping ahead. ‘I would certainly hate to see this land knocked down to another developer.’
‘I knew you’d see it my way.’ The man’s voice came in an intimate whisper. ‘We think alike, you and I.’ Putting the flat of his hand over the plans, he pushed them aside. The woman remained in a half-bent position facing the desk, her arms bearing the weight of her body, and her gaze fixed on the table. She could feel his fingers tracing the curve of her neck.
He could not know how his words had affected her. She was a woman with many needs. For too long now, she had been starved of one particular need, the kind a respectable woman should not dwell on for too long, a deepdown need that only a man could satisfy. Disillusioned with the ruthlessly ambitious woman he had married, Richard had long ago turned his back on her. Consequently, her needs had intensified. The feel of a man’s hands on her caused her to shiver; her shivering excited him, made him bolder. Leaning forward, he pressed himself against her back, his mouth kissing the nape of her neck, and his hands raising her skirt, creeping fingers against her thighs, touching her in that most private part. Trembling and a little afraid, she gently struggled, vaguely aware that her husband was in the next room. But she would not be denied, not now. It was too late.
Frantically he began tearing at the small buttons that ran from her waist to the collar of her dark blouse. ‘No.’ She bowed her head, moaning with pleasure, ceasing her efforts to pull away. Encouraged by her lack of resistance, he tore all the harder at the blouse. She could feel his hard member pushing into her spine, the sweat on his face as it rubbed against her neck, and her own need was all consuming. Laying her hands on his, she stilled them. Turning towards him, her face flushed, her fingers reached down, searching for and caressing the hard nakedness there. He was groaning now, his face turned upward, eyes closed, his whole body trembling. Suddenly, he was bent forward, his hands thrusting apart her blouse, his mouth wetting the dark erect nipples. Lifting her with incredible ease, he laid her across the desk and prising her legs open, spread his half-naked body over hers. Now, as he pushed himself into her, she cried out with joy, locking her arms round his neck and thrusting herself forward, making a noise like an animal devouring him, wanting him heart and soul.
Driven by a fever long suppressed, neither of them heard the door open. Neither saw the man who stood there, a sad bulky figure in the doorway. He remained only a moment then, head bowed in shame, Richard Ward turned away. He did not look at the woman who passed him in the hallway. His thoughts were too personal, too painful.
Tilly Mulliver had seen the look on his face, heard the sounds emanating from the study, knew what he had witnessed, and her heart went out to him. Unlike that gentle man she was neither shocked nor surprised because she had seen the way Tom Reynolds silently lusted after his employer’s wife; she knew also that Esther was no better. Pausing to watch the big man stride away, his broad shoulders bent as though beneath a great weight, Tilly despaired that she could do nothing to help him. She had always considered Richard to be a fine and good man, a man not possessed of ambition, or of the ruthlessness required to succeed in business, a man with principles and a certain dignity. Unfortunately, it was his high principles that had obliged him to reject the daughter he loved; a sad deed that had left its mark on him. Watching him stride away, hurt and humiliated by the shocking scene he had just witnessed, she wondered whether she should tell him her secret.
But then she reminded herself of the promise she had made to another whom she loved. She could not reveal the truth, because it was not hers to tell. For now, she must keep her own counsel. When the time came, he would be told. When the time came, she would no doubt lose him forever. But then, that was as it should be. Someone else had first claim on Richard. Someone else who loved him every bit as much as she did. But not more, never more. On silent feet, she returned to her duties, mindful of her place in the order of things.
It was three o’clock the following morning when Tilly Mulliver was woken from a shallow sleep. Voices resounded through the house, voices raised in anger. At first she did not recognise the man’s.
‘You’re a slut! God almighty… all these years, and I’ve been blind to what’s been going on right under my nose.’ There was a pause, then a loud bang as though someone had thumped their fist on a table or sent an object flying against the wall. ‘I want you out of this house! You and that useless son of yours.’
‘He’s your son too, Richard Ward, and don’t you forget it. What’s more, if anybody leaves this house, it won’t be me and it won’t be Ben. If anybody leaves, it will have to be you, I’m afraid. You see, this house is mine now. Together with certain other assets… all legally signed over. You yourself signed the papers. You gave me power of attorney. While you were wasting in your sick-bed, it was me who had to make all the decisions. It didn’t bother you then, and now there is nothing you can do, unless you want to broadcast to the world how your own judgement was sadly impaired. Of course, everyone knows you gave up your place at the helm a long time ago. Be careful, Richard! If I thought you were a real threat, you know I would stop at nothing to discredit you.’
Tilly Mulliver had been shocked by the revelations, but she was also delighted that Richard was incensed enough to raise his voice in such anger. At last, at long last, he had seen his scheming wife for what she really was. Now, though, his voice was strangely quiet. ‘I hope you appreciate the seriousness of what you’re saying?’
‘No! It’s you who needs to know the seriousness of what I’m saying, Richard. This house and certain parcels of land acquired by me while you were indisposed… they’re all in my name.’ She paused, allowing him to digest the information. ‘No doubt if you had made a speedier recovery, I might not have enjoyed such a free hand; but then, your illness was prolonged by your feverish attack of conscience with regard to your precious daughter! In spite of the fact that you turned her away, I was afraid that your love and devotion to her might make you forget how she had shamed you. I don’t forget how often you have threatened to throw Ben on to the streets; knowing full well that if he went, I would go with him. When I saw the opportunity to strengthen my own position and lay claim to that which rightfully belonged to me, I brought you the papers, and, being the trusting fellow you are, you made no bones about signing them. Of course, you never did read the small print. Believe me, Richard, there is no court in the land that would believe you did not know what you were signing. After all, it wasn’t your mind that was ill, was it? Now, you would not want such a thing bandied about, would you?’
‘So you’re adding forgery to your many other dubious talents.’ The calmness of his voice belied the cold fury inside him. He had been all kinds of fool. And yet he did not blame her. There was no one to blame but himself. Now he knew the real extent of her cunning, he was on his guard, his mind searching for a way out of what was a very dangerous situation. Knowing Esther, she would have executed the whole devious scheme with the utmost care. He realised with a sense of desperation that he would have to be twice as cunning as his wife if he was to recover that which she had taken from him. Paramount in his mind was the thought of his daughter. Even so, Beth had shamed herself and brought the family name into disrepute. He could not forget that.
‘Forgery! Oh, dear me, no. Certainly not forgery. As I say… you yourself signed the papers.’
‘Then, of course, I did not know what I was signing.’
‘That I can’t deny. But don’t reprimand yourself too much, my dear. After all, you really were quite ill for a long time. I must admit, it was rather cruel of me to take advantage of your amiable nature. But then, if I had waited until you had your full wits about you, you might have realised my intention and signed the house over to your daughter and her bastard.’
‘Beth was wrong in what she did, I won’t deny that, and I don’t know if I can ever forgive her. But whatever she is guilty of… she can never sink to your level. Remember that. Remember this also: you had better enjoy your little triumphs while you can… because they won’t last long. You have my word on it.’
‘Do your worst. It can only amount to nothing.’
As the cruel words died away, there came the sound of a door slamming, followed by Esther’s tinkling laughter and the spiteful jibe: ‘I can’t abide you near me. You’ve forgotten how to be a man, Richard. Do you hear me? I was a woman today! For the first time in years… I was made to feel like a woman. You’re nothing to me. NOTHING!’
Unable to sleep, Tilly got from her bed. She put on her robe, lit the candle and went on tip-toe down the back stairs and into the kitchen. Realising that she would probably be dismissed on the spot if Esther should discover her, she closeted herself in the pantry and proceeded to pour herself a glass of sarsaparilla from the big earthenware jug there. Still incensed by what she had heard earlier, she began mentally planning a short journey for the morrow. Bad things had taken place here this night. Things that she must not keep to herself. Above her, in Richard’s bedroom, she could hear the slow deliberate footsteps striding heavily back and forth across the floor. ‘Oh, Richard, why ever did you stay with such a woman?’ she murmured. But then she knew why, didn’t she? It always came back to his daughter. Beth, who was conceived in love, born in shame, and raised in jealousy and resentment. ‘Wherever you are now, Beth, I hope you never know your father’s unhappiness. I pray you’ve found a deal of contentment with your young man,’ she murmured kindly.
Suddenly there was movement in the hallway; whispering voices and soft footsteps. Blowing out the candle, Tilly crept to the kitchen door and gingerly opened it. The lamps were still burning either side of the front vestibule. Esther’s slight figure could be seen coming furtively through the door and into the recess. There was a man leaning heavily on her arm; the man was Ben and, as usual, he was the worse for drink. As they neared her hiding place, Tilly shrank back into the shadows.
Esther’s voice was scathing. ‘You fool! He might have heard you. When will you realise that everything we have is at stake? Time and again you’ve promised not to drink, not to gamble, and still you waste yourself. Look at you!’ From her hiding place, Tilly saw the dark spreading patch that ran down his collar. It was not the first time he had come home covered in blood. ‘Oh, you fool, Ben! You fool! One of these days you’ll get yourself killed,’ his mother cried. As she passed beneath the wall-lamp, Esther glanced up the staircase, her face drained white and haggard. ‘It’s all for you,’ she whispered to her son. ‘All of it. All the lying and scheming, all for you. You’re the only worthwhile thing in my life. Beth never belonged here with us. All of this is yours by right, and I won’t let you throw it all away. I’ll make a man of you yet.’ Here her voice fell lower, taking on an edge that frightened the listening woman. ‘I swear I’ll make a man of you yet. Or kill you with my bare hands!’
‘I saw him again tonight.’ He pushed her away, but quickly clung to her again when he almost lost his balance.
‘Who? Who did you see tonight?’ She was obviously humouring him, anxious to get him safely into the sitting room.
‘Blacklock… Tyler Blacklock.’ He laughed, a quiet cruel sound. ‘The fool asked me about Beth.’
‘What did you tell him?’
‘Oh, don’t worry. I told him how deliriously happy she was.’ ‘So, Blacklock still believes her to be married and living the good life? He still doesn’t know that her father turned her out? Presumably he doesn’t even know that Beth was carrying his child?’ The idea amused her. ‘You’re quite certain you said nothing that might make him suspect?’
‘What do you take me for?’ He lurched against her, flinging both his arms round her scrawny neck. ‘You old bitch,’ he mumbled. ‘You enjoy these rotten little games, don’t you, eh? I’m glad I told you now… it’s worth it just to see the look on your face.’ He drew her to a stop and swung her round so he could see her face in the half-light. ‘You hate Beth, don’t you? You’ve always hated her. I remember when me and her were kids. Even when it was me that was in the wrong, you’d always blame her… punish her… shut her away in the cellar or the attic. Why? It’s always puzzled me. Why do you hate her so much?’
‘Shut up, you drunken idiot!’ Unknowingly, he had touched a raw nerve. Thrusting his hands from her shoulders and threading her arm round his waist, she urged him on. ‘If he hears us, we’ll both follow Beth on to the streets and that’s a fact.’ She had not told Ben that the house was now in her name. Knowing his weakness for cards and drink, she thought it wiser to keep such information to herself.
He allowed her gently to propel him towards the sitting room, all the while murmuring, ‘Always puzzled me… always puzzled me.’
‘Don’t let it bother you, son. She’s not worth a second thought. She’s no good, and never has been.’ Her instincts told her that Ben was suffering a pang of conscience with regard to his part in this little deception. It wouldn’t do for him to reveal the truth to Tyler Blacklock, because then that young man would no doubt turn heaven and earth upside down to find his sweetheart. He was eligible too, and well on his way to being rich. The thought of Beth having both the man she loved and an easy life was too disturbing.
‘Well, it’s too late now anyway.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘Tyler’s got himself a woman. He was at the club with her. Talking about wedding bells, she was. Nice enough creature, I suppose – leggy, dark hair. But she doesn’t hold a candle to Beth.’ He stopped again, leaning heavily on her arm, his voice low and tearful. ‘I’m drunk, Mother,’ he said, ‘but I know what I’ve done. And I can’t help but wonder whether Beth’s all right.’
‘Well, you’d better stop wondering about her, and start wondering about yourself. Things can’t go on the way they are. I won’t put up with it, I tell you. The business is going downhill fast, and things are even worse between me and your father. You’re no use to me the way you are. I’ve warned you before, Ben, either you stop keeping bad company, or…’
He laughed in her face. ‘Or what, Mother dear? Throw me out, will you? Disown me? No… I don’t think you’d do that to your little boy. You couldn’t bring yourself to punish me when I was a child and guilty of all manner of things… you’d rather punish poor little Beth, wouldn’t you, eh? It’s me that’s in the wrong now. But you’re still punishing her, aren’t you? You still haven’t satisfied my curiosity. What is it with you and Beth? Why do you loathe her so?’
‘Be very careful what you say, Ben. It’s a dangerous thing to let your tongue run away with you,’ she told him. The warning was enough to silence him. He had never heard her talk like that before, at least not to him. It had a sobering effect. Without another word, he let himself be led into the sitting room.
The watching woman waited until the sitting-room door was closed on the two secretive figures. After a moment she retraced her steps to her own modest quarters. She did not go straight to her bed. Instead she stood with her back against the door. Such things she had heard this day! Such wicked things. Tomorrow was her day off; she would have much to report. First thing in the morning, she would make her way to the big house where she intended to relay everything she had learned. It was not an errand she would enjoy, because she knew the sorrow it would cause, but her specific task in this household was to be the eyes and ears of her dear companion. Unpleasant though it was, that was the reason for her being here, that and no other. Her explicit instructions were not to get involved, nor ever to reveal her real purpose there. And like a faithful friend, she had carried out these instructions to the letter; with one unforeseen eventuality. She had come to like Richard Ward, and like had deepened to love. But he saw her only as part of the furniture, and so her guilt was lessened. In that one respect only she had failed her dear friend. But though she had wished things might have been different, she consoled herself with the knowledge that it could come to nothing. And no one would ever know.
‘She’s mending now, Miss Mulliver, but she was real poorly… cried out for you, she did, but I had no way of knowing how to contact you.’ The maid was growing more and more flustered. She was desperate to ensure that Miss Mulliver should not think her irresponsible.
‘Poorly, you say?’ Tilly Mulliver’s only concern was for the state of her friend. ‘I hope the doctor was called. What did he say? When did this happen? It’s only been a week since I was here, and she was in perfectly good health then.’ Without stopping to take off her hat and coat, she hurried down the hallway with the little maid scurrying behind her. In a moment the two of them were running up the wide curved stairs. ‘I knew this would happen! I should be here… my place is with her.’ She had never liked the arrangement that had installed her in the Ward household, but having heard the tragic story, and knowing how much it meant to the woman who had rescued her from a life of loneliness, how could she refuse?
‘I did call the doctor, Madam… straight away.’ Not used to rushing about in such a manner, the maid was breathless. ‘He said I was just to keep her warm in bed, and feed her on soft broth. She were only poorly for three days.’ Anxious to be seen as having made all the right decisions, she added with a little pride, ‘There weren’t no need for a nurse, ’cause I looked after the mistress myself… stayed up all night when the fever took her… mopped her brow and talked nice and low ’til she come through it. This morning I boiled her a nice fresh egg, and she ate the lot. Like I said, the mistress is mending well now.’ If she thought to gain praise for her endeavours, she was disappointed. ‘Madam’ was only interested in hurrying to her friend.
‘It’s all right, Margaret.’ Tilly was relieved at the sight which greeted her as she entered the bedroom; a large bright room where the sunlight found every corner, and the furniture was regal. ‘You can leave us now,’ she said, taking off her outdoor clothes and handing them to the maid. ‘But I would welcome a pot of tea and a slice of your fruit loaf.’ She glanced at the woman sitting in the bed; a long-limbed creature with gentle brown eyes and chestnut-coloured hair that was now streaked with silver. ‘I understand you’ve had only a boiled egg this morning,’ she said meaningfully, then returning her attention to the maid, ordered, ‘Make that tea for two, Margaret. And a double helping of your delicious cake.’
‘Very well, Madam.’ The maid gave a knowing little nod and backed out of the door with a smile on her face. She was glad Miss Mulliver was here. There wasn’t another soul in the whole world who could handle the mistress like her, and, if the truth be told, she had been really concerned about the mistress’s bird-like appetite.
‘I’m not at all hungry,’ the woman protested, but then her whole face lit up in a brilliant smile as she held out her arms. ‘But, oh, Tilly… you don’t know how glad I am to see you.’ When the other woman folded herself into the delicate embrace, she was shocked at how thin her friend had become.
‘Oh, Elizabeth, why didn’t you send for me?’ she demanded, gently drawing herself away yet keeping the long pale fingers entwined in her own small hand. ‘If I had known you were ill, nothing on this earth would have kept me away.’ She was saddened and alarmed by the white face and big dark eyes that stared back at her from a thinner face than she remembered.
‘Now, you’re not to fuss,’ Elizabeth reprimanded. ‘You know how I can’t stand to be fussed over’ She slid her fingers from her friend’s grasp and pulled herself up in the bed, a smile lighting up the ageing beauty of her face. ‘What news have you?’
‘No news at all,’ she warned, ‘until I know how you’ve been… and whether you are on the mend.’ She had been sitting on the edge of the bed, and now she leaned forward to take the other woman’s hand again. ‘What ails you, Elizabeth?’ she asked in a tender voice. ‘You were in good health when I saw you only a week ago today.’
‘Something and nothing, that’s all it was.’ She laughed, but to the listening woman it held a hollow sound. ‘It might even have been Margaret’s fruit cake, for all I know.’ When she saw Tilly would not be so easily put off, she sighed loudly. ‘Oh, Tilly… it really was “something and nothing”. The fever came on me out of nowhere. I have no idea what caused it. The doctor seems to think I took a chill while out walking on Tuesday last. If you remember it was a blustery day, and you know how easily I take cold.’
‘Then what in God’s name were you doing out on such a day?’
‘I just felt the need. There was no particular reason. I was not on an errand, if that’s what you mean.’ For the briefest moment her eyes clouded over. ‘I would never do that again. I should never have done it on that day.’ A look of alarm spread through her features. ‘Oh, Tilly, it was a foolish thing… supposing he had seen me standing outside his house?’ She gasped now, putting her fingers to her mouth as though to stifle the horror of her thoughts. ‘What if she had seen me?’
‘No one saw you, Elizabeth,’ Tilly assured her, ‘and no one knows how close you are.’
‘They must never know!’
‘They never will… unless you want them to. Certainly, they will never know from me.’ Here she paused, looking deep into Elizabeth’s eyes. ‘Would it be so terrible if they knew?’
‘Don’t even say that! You don’t know.’ Her voice broke in a cry. ‘You can’t know what dreadful memories would be unleashed. Such jealousy, such pain.’ She shook her head vigorously. ‘No! I could never do that to him. Not to him. Not to… Richard.’ As always when she mentioned his name, her eyes filled with tears and she bowed her head, as though steeping herself in memories that were both painful and exquisite.
‘You still love him, don’t you? After all these years, you still love him.’ Realising her own love for the same man, there was a sadness in Tilly Mulliver’s voice.
‘I will always love him. You know that.’ Surreptitiously wiping her eyes, Elizabeth asked eagerly, ‘What news have you? How is he? And Beth… what of Beth?’
‘Goodness me! So many questions, and I’m hardly in the door.’ Tilly regarded the woman with concerned eyes. ‘First, tell me, Elizabeth, are you really mending?’ She suspected that her friend had been more ill than she admitted.
‘Yes.’ The answer was given with conviction. ‘When you come next week, I’ll be up and about, as good as ever.’
‘I don’t mean to leave my next visit for another week, Elizabeth,’ she insisted. ‘In fact, I had intended to persuade you to give up this present arrangement.’ She fell silent for a moment before going on quietly, ‘I want to come home, Elizabeth. I miss being with you.’
‘No! Oh, dear me, no.’ There was desperation in her voice. ‘I miss you too, but you must stay near him, at least for a while longer.’ She had not told her friend the truth. Her illness would develop. Soon, she would be at peace. Until then she must know his every move. She needed to live his life with him, if only through the eyes and ears of her dearest friend. Through shame and fear she had lost him once, a long time ago. She must not lose him again. ‘Please, Tilly. You know I wouldn’t ask you to do this unless it was important to me. Please, a while longer. You’ve been such a good and loyal friend to me all these years, and I know it was wrong of me to ask something so demanding of you, but…’ The tears threatened and she could not say the words.
‘All right, Elizabeth. I know what you’re trying to say.’ Miss Mulliver knew this woman like she knew herself, and loved her dearly. ‘Of course, I’ll do as you ask… for a while longer.’ She had long understood that it was not a healthy situation for any of them, and the sooner Elizabeth realised that, the better. She could have refused to go back to the Ward house, but she owed this woman everything. After her own parents died and she was left destitute, Elizabeth had found her wandering the streets. Out of the goodness of her heart, and perhaps because she also was lonely, she had taken Tilly home to be her companion. That was ten years ago. Since then the two of them had become almost inseparable. Until the day, some time back, when Elizabeth had discovered where Richard and Esther Ward lived.
She had told Tilly the whole story, about the man she adored, and whose child she had brought into the world. She told about the shame, and the heartbreaking decision she was forced to make under duress. She revealed how, since that fateful day, her life had not been worth living… the loneliness, the bitter regrets and the lingering shame that rose above all else. When she saw the post of maid in general to Esther Ward advertised, she used all her powers of persuasion to convince Tilly that it would only be for a very short time: ‘Just so I know how he is… how my daughter Beth is faring.’ Against her better judgement, Tilly had agreed. Now she was afraid that Elizabeth’s initial interest had become a dangerous obsession.
Today, though, was not a suitable time to raise the subject of it all coming to an end. Also, Tilly had decided that she could not now reveal the news she had brought with her this morning; shocking news, news that told how Richard had been cheated and deceived by his own wife… and devastating news of Beth… how she was not safe and happy with Tyler Blacklock, as they had first thought, and how she also had been betrayed, both by her own brother Ben, and by the woman who had raised her from a child.
How could Tilly tell of these things? How could she explain the loathing in Esther Ward’s voice, and the awful contempt in which she held both Richard and Beth… the very people whom Elizabeth idolised? Tilly realised now that she could never tell her these things, and yet, she knew that the gentle Elizabeth had a right to know. But not now. She could not tell her yet; not until Elizabeth was completely strong again. With a sinking heart, she also realised that she must go on living with the Ward family, at least for now. And after all Elizabeth had done for her, heaven only knew it was little enough to ask in return. Besides, her own secret affection for Richard Ward was calling her back. And so she would return, to watch and listen, and to hope against hope that all would come well for both Richard and Beth. She smiled now, a smile that put her friend at ease. ‘I won’t let you down, Elizabeth,’ she said fondly. ‘You know that.’ And yet she felt bound to warn, ‘But, there has to come a time soon when you must let go of the past… or go to Richard and Beth with all that is in your heart.’
Elizabeth shook her head, a great sadness on her. ‘I can’t go to them. I can never go to them.’
‘But why? I have never understood why.’
‘Because I sinned against them both all those years ago. I sinned and brought shame down on all of us. It was shame that crippled four lives.’ Now, when the memories poured over her, she faltered. ‘Shame is a terrible thing, Tilly. It never goes away. I have no right to intrude on their lives. Not now. Not ever.’ She would not be on this earth much longer. It was too late for confrontations. ‘But, oh, I do cherish the little things you tell me… the things he laughs, the way he strides out with pride. Wrong though it is, I still love him. You keep him alive in my heart. Through him… through you, my dearest friend, I have a purpose in living.’ As she spoke, joy brightened her face, and the love she still felt for this man was alive in her every word. ‘And Beth… so lovely, you say? So delightful. Sometimes, I would give everything just to let her know the truth.’ The tears coursed down her face. ‘She would never forgive me, and neither would Richard. I made my decision a long time ago, and now I have no rightful place in their lives. I’ve caused enough heartache. I won’t be the cause of any more.’
‘Oh, Elizabeth, Elizabeth!’ Embracing her friend, Tilly asked herself whether, given the same circumstances, she herself would have acted any differently? The answer was the same as on every previous occasion she had asked herself that question. When she was young and maybe a little wilful, Elizabeth had made what she deemed to be the right decision, and she had suffered because of it. Now, almost a quarter of a century later, she was suffering more than ever, because she could not forget, and because she needed to feel close to the ones she still loved. Who could blame her? Who could say she was wrong? Certainly not Tilly. She had her own shame, and could not rid herself of the guilt that came from loving a man who was not hers to love. She felt no wrong in inventing things to tell Elizabeth. If she could ease her pain, then she would gladly make any sacrifice that was asked of her. If it had not been for Elizabeth taking her in off the streets and giving her a home, then Tilly’s own life would have been empty. She adored Elizabeth, this good kind soul who had asked for little in return.
‘In a moment you can tell me all about Richard. But first, is Beth happy with her young man? What was his name… Tyler? Yes, that’s right. I remember now.’ Suddenly she was young again, living through her daughter, like every mother does. ‘And tell me again how she has a look of me.’ The questions spilled out excitedly and her dark eyes shone. ‘You will tell me everything, won’t you, Tilly? You won’t leave anything out?’
‘No, I won’t leave anything out.’ Her conscience pricked her as she went on to lie, telling Elizabeth everything she wanted to hear. Good and happy things that would not cause her heartache. Things that took her back to when she was young. Things that filled her with joy and drew her into the everyday lives of the two people she had loved for so many lonely years. Through her friend, Elizabeth captured so many dreams, building memories that were, by their very nature, second-hand. But she cherished them, and hung on every word that Tilly uttered.
‘Richard looks so proud and handsome,’ she related, and when it was said, it came from the heart, because it was what Tilly herself saw, the man whom Elizabeth had never stopped loving, and the man who had captured her own heart. When it came to telling Elizabeth about Beth, how she ‘seemed happy enough’, Tilly prayed it was so.
Elizabeth listened with rapture to everyday incidents of family life. Richard and Beth were hers at last, the family she had been cruelly denied; because of love, and guilt and shame, they were closer now than they had ever been. Elizabeth had lost a lifetime of belonging. It was snatched from her by a woman without heart or conscience, a woman driven by greed. Esther Ward had more reason to be ashamed than her vulnerable sister Elizabeth, for she had taken advantage of the forbidden love which had grown between Elizabeth and Richard, and she had never once opened her heart to the innocent girl-child who was born out of that love. Yet she saw only admirable virtues in herself, and badness in others.
‘Liverpool!’ she cried with surprise. After they made love, he had left the warm bed and her possessive arms. Like so many times before, he had gone to the window where he stared out across the night sky, his thoughts a million miles away. When, sensing that he had left her alone in more ways than one, the woman asked him to come back to bed, he had not turned to look at her but instead remained silent a moment longer. After an agonising lull, he told her quietly, ‘So often I’ve left London, only to return, yet I can’t settle. For a long time now I’ve intended going North. There are growing opportunities there, especially in the major cities where, like London, the population is spilling into the suburbs. As yet the land is still relatively cheap. Its potential isn’t even tapped. So far I’ve been very fortunate in that I’ve been in the right place at the right time; buying land and property in a subdued market then selling it on when demand is high. There have been ups and downs, yes, but on the whole my fortunes have grown. There’s an auction in Liverpool soon. I’m tempted to attend.’ He nodded as though reassuring hirpself. ‘Yes, I have a good feeling about it.’ Clambering out of bed, the tall dark-haired woman flung a silk robe around her slim figure. Going to him, she wound her arms into his smoking-jacket and snaked them about his naked body. ‘I love you,’ she murmured.
He smiled into her eyes, his heart filled with kindness and gratitude; but not love. He could never love any other woman. Not when Beth was so alive in his mind. ‘I know,’ he whispered.
‘And you would still leave me?’
He smiled again, a sad, lonely smile that told her he was still not hers. She believed he never would be. ‘Come with me, if you want to,’ he whispered. He owed her that much.
‘Not as your wife though?’
He shook his head, ‘Is that so important?’
Now it was her turn to lapse into thought. Being the wife of Tyler Blacklock was important. But she would never admit it.
During the year they had been together, she had seen him time and again in the dark quiet hours when he believed himself to be unobserved. She had watched him, standing by the window, tortured, lonely, a man in pain, a man in love. But it was not her he was in love with. ‘No,’ she lied. ‘It’s not important.’
Relieved, he drew her into the haven of his arms. ‘You’re a good woman,’ he told her.
She laughed dryly. ‘But not the marrying kind, is that it?’ ‘Something like that.’
‘It’s her, isn’t it?’
‘What do you mean?’
‘I don’t know who she is, Tyler. I only know that she has your love, and that she is a very lucky woman.’ She asked a question then that tore him apart. ‘Why aren’t you with her instead of being with me?’
He shrugged his shoulders, but gave no answer.
‘She’s married. Is that it?’ She saw the agony in him. ‘Oh, Tyler, I’m sorry. You’ve been good to me. I should learn to mind my own business.’
Drawing her tighter to him, he assured her, ‘If you want to come North with me, you can. You know that, don’t you?’
‘Of course I want to come with you,’ she told him. ‘Don’t decide to settle there though, will you?’ She shivered. ‘North seems a long way away, and they tell me it’s cold there.’ When he laughed, she tugged at his arm. ‘The bed’s still warm though.’
‘Not yet,’ he said, gently freeing himself. ‘In a while.’ Disappointed, she turned away and slid back between the sheets. From there, she peeped at his tall muscular figure, so solitary, always alone. Except for the woman he kept hidden in his heart.