I Keep Messing Up

Calling one of his moms

Dr. Wolski.

        “It’s Kathleen, here, Angel,”

        she says. His other mom,

        Dorothy, nods.

        “Trust me, she gets enough of

        that at school—she’d be

        insufferable if we

        kept it up at home!”

We laugh and talk

through dinner and into the night.

Turns out Dorothy is an administrator

at the hospital—and she’s on something

called an ethics panel.

         “Angel has an ethical dilemma,”

         Marcus says, grabbing another

         homemade cookie off the plate.

         “Tell them about Brendan.”

So I tell ’em about the broken window

and blue envelopes,

and I’m trying not to get worked up

but it’s hard.

          “You should absolutely

          call the authorities,” Dorothy

          says. And she takes a sip of wine.

Kathleen shakes her head.

          “I couldn’t disagree more.”

          “Why?” Dorothy asks.

          “For one thing, the money he

          sends is a clear sign of remorse—

          he is paying his debt.

          “For another, Angel doesn’t know

          why he broke the window—that

          should inform any decision she

          makes.” Kathleen says to me,

          “You should try to find out.”

Dorothy doesn’t like that.

          “The reason doesn’t matter—

          actions have consequences.”

And they’re off into

a philosophical argument

about crime and the meaning

of punishment.

Disagreeing but not fighting.

It’s interesting to hear and

I’m trying to follow them

but it’s getting late and

I accidentally yawn.

Marcus takes my hand.

          “Now we’ve done it,”

          he pretends to whisper.

          “They’ll be up

          half the night debating …

          Let’s go.”

They stop

long enough

to walk us

to the door.

          “It was wonderful to meet you,”

          Dorothy says. Kathleen smiles.

          “See you in class.”

And on the way home

even though I don’t

mention religion

I’m thanking God.

You think meeting

your boyfriend’s parents

for the first time

is nerve-racking?

Girl, you just try doing it trans.