Wearing distressed jeans and a James Perse T-shirt with food stains that says “668: Neighbor of the Beast,” Larry Mersault is greeted by Legion with a soulful dap followed by an elaborate secret handshake, with every agent in the room hatefully wondering what the fuck is going on.
The movie star places his reader between Fruity and Balthazar in the nosebleed seats behind the oceanic conference table. Legion causes a covering agent to blush when he thanks her for getting him a meeting with Spielberg. A senior agent with white hair raises a project at Universal his client is directing called “The Carthaginian” about the elephant-riding Hannibal that could be his Gladiator. When the star catches Mersault yawning, Legion declares he doesn’t make movies with titles he cannot pronounce. Another agent, Korean, raises his hand. Lester Barnes nods, and the agent in Prada brings up Legion playing the heavy in the next James Bond installment. Lester suggests maybe MGM should consider Antwon as the next 007. Legion tells the room he doesn’t want to play a villain, not yet, and he doesn’t want to be James Bond—
“Are there any scripts out there about Jesus Christ?”
The room laughs, thinking Legion is fucking with them.
Larry Mersault raises his hand. The room goes quiet.
Mersault suggests an unproduced script called “Golgotha” by writer/director Thør Rosenthal.
The room detonates with dollar signs.
“It’s Se7en meets Last Temptation of Christ. Pontius Pilate hires a private detective named Judas to investigate a serial killer who may or may not be the Messiah.”
Legion hushes the room the way a quarterback silences a stadium.
“Is the script as good as Faith Don’t Leave?”
“Better,” says Mersault.
Legion steps around the flesh peddlers to Fruity and Balthazar sandwiching Mersault and raises the reader’s paw like Buster Douglas in Tokyo—
“It’s Miller Time.”