Chapter 27

Mick managed to snag a seat next to Heather at the Braden’s dining room table, and since their combined families made a large group, even with the younger members sitting at card tables, he was pleased to have to sit pressed tight against her. They were so close together he could feel the warmth of her body from shoulder to legs. He gave her thigh a nudge with his, and she turned to look at him he gave her a slow, sexy wink. She blushed, but favored him with a saucy grin in return.

His mom sat next to Heather’s mom at the head of the table, but over the buzz of conversations, and the clatter of silverware on dishes, Mick couldn’t hear what they were discussing. Whatever the topic was, the two ladies were smiling and really animated. It had been a long time since he’d seen his mom so happy and vibrant, and she looked ten years younger.

His mother raised her voice, so she could speak to his father across the table, “Phil, Joyce is going to Ireland next month to see the Irish Derby! Isn’t that exciting?”

“Seems like a long way to go to see a horse race,” his dad grumbled.

Joyce beamed at him, as if he had not just been surly and rude. “It is a haul, but one of our stallions sired a horse running in it, so I’m just thrilled to bits to be able to go! I’ll know some horse folks when I get there, but I wish I had someone to travel with me.”

His mother’s eyes grew soft and dreamy. “I wish I could go with you.”

As his father choked on his beer, Joyce clasped her hands together and said, “Carol, what a marvelous idea! You could come with me; we’d have so much fun!”

His mother grew pink and cast a sidelong glance at her husband’s scowling face. “I couldn’t possibly go. Could I?”

“No!” His father barked, which might have been a miscalculation on his part, based on his mom’s reaction.

She straightened her spine, lifted her chin, and spoke with conviction, “I don’t see why not. I don’t have any little ones at home, Susan’s wedding is over with, and Dave will be at WVU football training camp by then.”

“What about Danny and me?” his father asked, and Mick almost felt sorry for the man. He looked so confused by the normally gentle woman’s defiance.

His mom didn’t seem to be having any such problem. She waved her hands dismissively. “You and Danny are grown men. You’re both capable of taking care of yourself for a long weekend.”

“I’ve always wanted to see Ireland,” Joyce enthused. “Maybe we could take a couple of weeks and travel around the country.”

“What about a passport, Ma?” Danny interjected. “You need one to go to a foreign country, and you don’t have one.”

His mother’s face fell, and Mick felt like decking his brother for selfishly dashing his mother’s hopes.

He must have tensed up enough for Heather to notice, because she gave his knee a reassuring squeeze before saying, “Passports can be expedited. I can drive you down to the passport office in D.C., Carol. We’ll have to wait in line, probably for ages, but you’ll have your passport in time for the Irish Derby.”

Hope brightened his mother’s eyes. “Really, Heather? It might be possible? And you’d help me?”

“Of course it is, and of course I will.” Heather smiled at his mom. “It will be so much fun for you two to go to Ireland. I just wish I could join you, but it’s such a busy time at the Retreat.”

“After we eat, I’ll look online to see what Mrs. Evans needs to do, Grandma,” Caitlin called over from the kids’ table.

“Y’all are so kind and helpful.” Carol beamed.

His father’s fearsome scowl encompassed them all. “Just a regular bunch of Helpful Hannahs.”

“Dad and I have to work tomorrow, Ma; we’re going home right after we eat. When do you think you could go to Washington to do this passport business?” Danny set his jaw and asked, his support clearly with the old man, as usual.

“Y’all go ahead home today, and leave Mom here. She can stay in my cabin, and do what she needs to do in D.C., and then I can drive her home next weekend,” Mick said, also fulfilling his family role and falling in squarely on his mom’s side, and in opposition to his dad and Danny.

“But where will you stay?” his mom asked.

Mick glanced at Heather. “I’ll find a place to crash, Mom; don’t worry about me.”

There was a general snickering around the table at his pronouncement, which caused Heather to turn red as a beet and smack him under the table.

“Carol…” His father’s voice held a warning tone, thick with the promise of unpleasantness to come, and Mick ground his teeth, and half-rose from his chair, ready to defend his mother.

Carol glanced at him, and her smile, while small and tight, was determined, and he slowly lowered himself back on his seat.

“Phil, would you please help me with something in the kitchen?” his mother asked, as sweet as the tea at the Nosh Pit.

His father frowned at the transparent excuse to get him alone to talk, but rose from his chair and stomped to the kitchen.

His mother stood and smiled at everyone. “Y’all go right ahead with your meal. We’ll be back in a jiffy.”

Mick tensed as his mother followed the old man into Mrs. Braden’s kitchen.

Heather rubbed his hand, where it was clenched into a fist on his lap. She whispered to him, “Don’t worry, Mick, your mom has it under control.”

Mrs. Braden smiled warmly at them all. “Eat up, everyone, before it gets cold.”

The silence gave way to the clatter of silverware as everyone followed her command, for, gracious as it was, there was no doubt it was an order to continue with their meal, and to give his folks some privacy. Even Danny shoveled eggs into his sullen face, while he listened to Deidre chatter away about the weather.

He took a deep breath, and followed suit. It did seem like everything was under control, and there was no sense in letting this delicious food go to waste.

****

“Thanks for letting me use your cabin this week, Mick. Jeff needed all the available rooms at the Retreat, so I appreciate it. Joyce said I could stay with her, but I didn’t want to impose, and I suspect you won’t mind the chance to stay with your girl.”

His mom hinting about his sex life, now that’s not at all awkward. Mick’s face flushed as he reached for the spare sheets on the closet shelf. “Jeez, Mom, can we not talk about Heather and me.”

His mother efficiently stripped the sheets off the bed, as she spoke in a matter-of-fact manner, “I don’t think we can, Mickey. I think there are things about Heather and you we need to discuss.”

Mick set the clean sheets on the nightstand and gathered the old ones as his mother took them off the bed. Anything to avoid eye contact with his mother, as she seemed determined to discuss his sex life with Heather.

“What do you want to discuss, Mom?”

He heard the smile in his mother’s voice, as she said, “Not what you seem to think I want to discuss. Believe me, I don’t want to hear details of my kids’ sex lives any more than y’all want to tell them to me.”

He tossed the sheets in the wicker laundry basket housekeeping left in his cabin for used towels and sheets. “Okay. I can’t even pretend that’s not a relief.”

She laughed as she shook out the fitted sheet. Mick stood on the opposite side of the bed, and caught one side of the sheet to help her.

“Thank you, honey; it’s much easier to make a bed with two people. I appreciate the help. With Susan married and out of the house, I’m on my own with these kinds of jobs. Dave helps some, but he’s been so busy with senior activities, and I don’t want to be a burden to him during what should be one of the most fun times in a young person’s life.”

“No reason Dad and Danny can’t help you.”

His mom smiled gently. “Which brings me around to what I want to talk about. They can’t help, because they’re just not made that way. They wouldn’t even think to help me with my chores. They make the money and I tend to the household jobs, is their way of thinking. They believe there are things men do, and things women do, and never the twain shall meet. You’re different.”

“Maybe not about gender roles, but about other things, I don’t think I am, not deep down.”

His mom snapped the top sheet, and he caught his end and tucked it in on his side of the bed.

“I was afraid you felt that way, and it might be what’s always held you back from getting serious with a girl. I see how special Heather is to you, and I don’t want this idea to come between you two.” She reached across the bed and grasped his hand, and forced him to hold her gaze. “Listen to me, Mickey, you are not your father, and Heather isn’t me.”

Mick squeezed her hand, and then released it. He tossed the fluffy comforter on top of the bed. “I don’t know, Mom, I think I’m just like the old man, and Heather and you share a lot of qualities. You’re both loyal to your family, hard-working, kind-hearted…”

His mother smiled as she spread out the comforter. “Thank you, sweetie-pie, I appreciate the comparison, but I meant Heather is nothing like I was when I met your father. I was so young and inexperienced, and Heather has it all together and she’s so self-confident.”

She handed Mick a pillowcase and kept one for herself. As they both stuffed the down pillows into the white cases, she continued, “You do have some of your daddy’s traits, that’s true, but they’re the good ones—the traits that made me fall in love with him way back when. You love your family, and are so strong. You’re both good men…”

Mick snorted.

“You are. But your father is also a hard man. A judgmental man, with a very narrow view of the world, and that’s where you’re different.”

Mick grabbed the pile of clean folded towels from the chair next to the dresser, and brought them into the bathroom. He thought about his mom’s words as pulled his used towels off the rack, and put the clean ones in their place. Hope flared in his chest. Could his mom be right? Did he have his father’s good points, but not the bad ones? Could he have a relationship with Heather and not end up browbeating her the same way his dad did with this mom?

“I’m going to get a cola, and sit on the porch,” his mother called from the bedroom. “Do you want one too?”

“Sure, Mom, that sounds good. Thanks.”

He heard the ice clinking into glasses in the kitchen as he balled up the dirty towels and put them in the laundry basket for housekeeping to deal with in the morning. There were some definite advantages to living on Retreat property, but he was looking forward to getting into his own place, even if it meant washing his own sheets and towels.

He took a deep breath. His mom knocked his whole world off its axis with one simple statement. Could it really be that easy to have everything he wanted with Heather?

The screen door slammed, and the loud bang pulled him back to the moment. He walked out to the porch, where his mom sat in one of the Adirondack chairs with two icy glasses of cola on the table between the chairs. He sat in the other chair, picked up a glass, and took a refreshing sip.

He turned to look at his mom, who looked completely relaxed and at peace as she watched the river flow by the cabin.

“Can I ask you a personal question, Mom?”

She laughed in a happy way, and seemed much more like the mom he remembered from his childhood, than the quiet, timid woman she’d become over the years with his father. “You can ask, but I’m making no promises about answering.”

His lips tilted up, “Fair enough.” He paused and took a deep breath. “Why did you stay with Dad all these years?”

Her smile stayed in place, but she winced just a bit. “Boy, oh boy, you don’t pull any punches do you?”

He inclined his head. “I did say it was personal.”

His mom took a long drink of cola, and looked back to the river to gather her thoughts before she finally spoke. “I guess the short answer is because I love him.”

Mick frowned and shook his head once. “Could you give me the long answer then, because I don’t really understand the short one?”

She turned her head to smile at him, but looked back to the river as she talked, “I’d just finished high school, and we got married right after, we were so young. I was crazy about him. He was a couple of years older than me and was the strong, silent type. He seemed so romantic to me, like the hero in one of those gothic romances I love to read. We had you right away, and he was so excited to have a son.”

Mick cast her a narrow-eyed, skeptical look.

“He was!” His mother defended her point of view. “He was so proud to have started our little family. He would stand next to your crib and look at you with such wonder in his eyes. Your daddy is a very old-fashioned man, and he believes raising the babies is women’s work, so that’s what I did. And the babies kept coming.”

“So you stayed with him for us?”

His mom shrugged. “In part, yes. I never could’ve supported you kids. I didn’t have any outside work experience. I’d been a wife and mother from the time I was eighteen.” Her eyes grew soft. “And I do love your father, Mick. He’s a good man, deep down.”

“Real deep down.” Mick snorted.

She frowned. “I don’t like hearing you talk about your daddy that way. He’s a tough man, but he worked hard in the mine all his life to support us, and he’s never laid a hand on any of us in anger.”

“He didn’t have to; he did plenty of damage with his words.”

His mother took a deep breath and nodded. “True. And being the oldest boy, I think he was hardest on you. And you always wanted such different things in life from him. You were such a smart boy, so good at sports, and you wanted to see so much more of the world than our little town, and the inside of the mine. It hurt him, and I think it scared him, so he lashed out at you even more. I’m sorry for that, and sorry I didn’t do more to ease your way, but I have to be honest, I didn’t want to lose you either.”

His mother’s sadness and raw honesty made his eyes burn. Past the lump in his throat, he said, “Oh, Ma, I’m sorry too. I didn’t want to leave you, but I just couldn’t spend my whole life in that damned mine.”

She reached across the table and patted his hand. “I know, Mickey, there’s no need for you to apologize for who you are and how you’re made. God gave you brains and drive, and it would have been wrong for you to ignore those gifts. Although, I can’t deny I’m thrilled to bits you’ve decided to move back so close to home. The whole family is.”

Mick raised a brow. “The whole family?”

His mother’s answer was firm. “Yes. Some of us just know how to show it better than others. You have to understand, Mickey, you’re the first one in either of our families to go to college, so when you were born, we didn’t even think of it as something our child would want to do. From the second he heard he had a son, your father dreamed of working with you, the way he’d worked with your grandpa. When you didn’t want to do it, he was thrown for a loop. It hurt him. Deep.”

“I guess I can see that,” Mick conceded grudgingly. “But he’s held onto his anger for years. Why has he never gotten over it? When I started in the NFL, people would say things like, ‘your father must be so proud of you,’ and I’d smile and shrug. They thought I was being modest, but I was so ashamed he wasn’t proud of me; I never wanted anyone to know.”

His mother’s eyes glistened. “I can’t make excuses for his behavior; I’ve done it for too many years. He held onto his hurt and anger for too long, and when Dave and Billy made noises about following your footsteps out of town, it stirred it all up again for him. Now Danny is a whole lot like your father. He never wanted to do anything but follow the family tradition and work in the mine alongside your dad. And seeing Phil so upset about your brothers and you, has made Danny a little hurt and jealous. He followed in your dad’s footsteps, always did what was expected of him, and he doesn’t understand why it wasn’t enough. Why he wasn’t enough for your father. That’s why he’s so resentful about you.”

Mick stared straight ahead, and huffed out a deep breath. “I never thought about it like that. Man, no wonder Danny is always on my case.”

“Jealousy is a terrible thing, and whether he meant to or not, your father fostered those feelings with Danny. My hope is someday, Danny and you will realize he’s who he is, and you are who you are, and there can be some sort of peace between you boys.”

“I’m seeing things in a new light after talking with you, Mom, so I’ll try harder with Danny from now on, but there’s a lot of years of anger and resentment between us. I can’t make any promises things between us will change.”

His mother held his hand on the table between them, and blinked back tears. “All you can do is try, son, and I appreciate it more than I can say. I tried my best with you kids, but I should’ve stood up to your father a long time ago.”

Mick squeezed her hand. “You are now, with your trip to Ireland with Joyce.”

She raised her head with pride. “I am, aren’t I?”

“You are, and I’m proud of you.”

She swiped a tear from her cheeks with her other hand. “That means a real lot to me, Mickey. I hope your daddy comes around and stops being so mad at me.”

Mick wanted to assure his mother his father would get over it, and everything would be sunshine and rainbows, but in his experience the old man could hold onto a grudge like nobody’s business. “What are you going to do if he doesn’t, Mom? I don’t like to think of you living with that kind of crap. You deserve more.”

His mother jutted out her chin. “I do. It’s taken me too long to realize it, but I do deserve more. So, if Phil can’t get over me taking a once-in-a-lifetime trip with a new friend, then I guess I’ll have to move on and out, because I do deserve more, and I’m not letting his bad moods and opinions rule my life anymore. And neither should you, Mickey. Let yourself be happy with Heather, because you deserve happiness too.”