31

These days, Bart didn’t talk to people unless he absolutely had to. If he kept his head down and walked fast, people usually left him alone. His only goal was to get through this semester—his final one—and graduate. After that, he planned to find an entry level position with a social service agency. Just because God had deserted him didn’t mean that Bart didn’t want to still help people. But it would be his job, not a ministry. The thought didn’t fill him with excitement or happiness. But he was an adult and expected to take care of himself now. He rounded the corner of the building and slammed into another body.

“Owww.”

He looked down at Nia on the ground.

“I’m so sorry, Nia. I wasn’t watching where I was going.”

She grinned at him from her spot on the ground. “That’s OK. I wasn’t watching where I was going either.”

He held out a hand. She grasped it. Bart could feel the warmth in her touch. A part of him wanted to pull her to him and just hold her. He missed her so much. But she was serious about her relationship with God, and he didn’t want to mess that up. He dropped her hand. “I haven’t seen you in a while. How are you?”

“Hanging in there. How about you?”

“I’m fine.”

“We really miss you at the worship meetings. All of us. Not just me. Why don’t you come by and say hi to everyone?”

No reason to argue with her. “Yeah, I’ll try to do that. One of these days.”

She grinned. “That sounds like a definite maybe.”

He couldn’t help but smile back. “Who knows?”

“Bart…”

“Yes.”

“Are you…well I’m not exactly sure how to say this.”

“Just say it, Nia.”

“Tanya said something strange to me the other day and…”

“Well, it was Tanya, so what do you expect?” He smiled. “Just kidding. She’s not all that bad.”

“Yeah, I know but it sounded as if she knew something about you that maybe I should know.” Her brown eyes peered into his with real concern and caring. “Is there something I should know? About you?”

He wanted to pour out his heart to her—tell her about the pain and the loneliness. Not just because of his mom’s death or their breakup but because of his severed relationship with God. He took a deep breath but then shook his head. “Not that I can think of.”

She nodded but looked a bit sad. “OK, then. If you need to talk call me. We’re still friends, and I’m a good listener. Anytime, Bart. Anytime.”

“I’ll remember that. And that same offer holds true for you. If you need me, call me.”

“Thanks.” She walked past him.

He turned to watch her. Call out to her. Tell her the truth. Those words screamed inside his head. But there was no way she’d understand how God had abandoned him. She’d be so disappointed in him.

And why not? He was disappointed in himself.