It was still dark when he awoke next morning. His watch showed shortly after 5.00 am. – too late to attempt further sleep. Once showered and dressed, he began his office – mechanically, while his mind darted in many directions. After some minutes he closed his breviary. “Later Lord,” he promised. “First we need to talk.” In both anger and sadness he continued. “How can You let this happen!” Yesterday’s group flashed before his eyes. “I know – You’ve given us free will and all that stuff. And I know the other side may have similar horrific wounds that we have caused. So, how can we stop this horror?”
He was still wrestling with this mental riddle when the gong sounded for breakfast, after which he was to receive directions for the day.
Leaving the canteen he almost collided with Hugh. “Glad to see you again, Joe,” the older man began. Then added, almost surprising himself, “I think we both have a few minutes to spare. Come into my office.” Together they covered the short distance to office.
“Sit down, Joe. By the look on your face, you have already faced the horror of war!”
“Yeah,” Joe nodded quietly.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
“I suppose my head knew I would be witnessing horror. But my heart wasn’t ready for yesterday.”
“Yes. I can understand that. If it gets too much for you, we can send you home – it can be pretty hard for padres. I’m not a religious person so I don’t have the religious questions you have. Power and property are the main ingredients of the beginning of war. Sometimes each side will have varying ideas of right and wrong. Sometimes, one side will press on for more power and sovereignty at the expense of ignoring any aspects of right and wrong. Sometimes views on right and wrong become quite muddled.”
Hugh gulped a large mouthful of water, then continued, “Like many of those here, I was conscripted. But I did believe in what we were fighting for. No doubt the other side believes the same – most of them anyway. War is not a lily that can be gilded!”
“Thanks, Hugh,” Joe whispered.
“I also must admit, most of the conscripts now are not happy about being here. But, for the sake of their country they give it their best shot. Shamefully, there is a minority – a very small one – who have performed atrocities. It is shameful, but something we have to accept!”
“Thanks, Hugh,” Joe whispered again. “Life has always been rather black and white for me. I will try to adapt to the shades of grey of war.” They parted with a firm handshake.
Joe soon found the small room that was to be his office for the next two years.