Today was the day of reckoning. We were officially about to let our listeners know about the divorce and my heart had never felt heavier.
“Are you sure this is the way you want to handle this?” Nicole said as I handed her the scripts for the show.
I nodded. “We owe it to our listeners. And besides, it’s just a matter of time before the public finds out, so we’d rather do it this way ourselves. Go out on top.”
“Well, Jay’s already in there,” Nicole said. “He’s been at his desk for two hours, not saying a word, just sitting there like he’s lost in thought. And he barely spoke when he walked into the studio.”
He probably wants to make sure he doesn’t come out looking like the bad guy, I thought. Well, he didn’t have to worry about that. I was tired of being bitter and angry. I was going to do this show, make our announcement, and then go on my merry way.
We still hadn’t figured out what we were going to do about the show long-term. Personally, I wanted to let Jay have the show; I had no desire to continue dispensing relationship advice. But I didn’t know if that was possible, since Riley had made it clear he wanted the team. Riley had been so angry when we’d announced today would be our last broadcast. Of course, he’d tried to talk to us some more, but he’d given up in disgust, saying only that he thought we “were making a grave mistake.”
He was in a meeting with the bigwigs right now to figure out their next move. I imagined that included suing us for breach of contract. I couldn’t focus on that, though. After the ordeal I’d been through, I just wanted to move on.
I walked into the studio, sat in my regular spot, put my headphones on, and got settled. My eyes met Jay’s and had he not been clear regarding his wishes, I would’ve definitely thought this was something he didn’t want to do.
But this was something we both wanted. I’d wanted it first, then he’d accepted it.
Thankfully, the show was about to start, so we jumped right in. There was a flurry of callers who wanted to continue to comment on everything we’d been through; then there were a few who wanted the typical advice. The hour went by in a blur and I couldn’t really recall all that I’d said. I only knew we were nearing the end of the show because Jay said, “Well, before we wrap up, we have some news to share with our listeners.” He briefly hesitated, then went on. “Today is bittersweet.” He looked at me to allow me to take over. I didn’t say anything. I was afraid that if I opened my mouth, I’d break out in tears.
Pull yourself together, I told myself.
“We’ve been bringing you love advice—on our own at first, me through songs, Dr. Shannon through her practice—and then together as the Lovejoy team for the past two years,” Jay continued, when it became obvious I wasn’t going to say anything. “It’s a job that we both took seriously, one we were committed to giving our all to. We’ve loved helping heal relationships, helping couples rediscover the true meaning of love, and providing the glue to hold so many marriages together—”
“Unfortunately,” I interjected, finally finding my voice, “we couldn’t hold our own relationship together.” My voice quivered as I spoke. “Some of you may have heard the rumors about my husband and me, and, well, it is with a heavy heart,” I said, taking a deep breath and struggling not cry, “that we share with you—”
“That even the strongest of couples,” Jay said quickly, cutting me off, “falter.” He stared at me intensely, his eyes welling with tears as he continued talking into the mic. “We want you to know that we realize firsthand that marriage is something worth fighting for, and when you have that one person who God has designed especially for you, you don’t give up just because things get hard.”
Confusion blanketed my face.
“I…” Jay said, not taking his gaze off me. “We had come here today to tell our listeners that we had agreed to go our separate ways, and while it’s been something I told you that I was okay with, the thought of one more day of waking up without you by my side has caused me unimaginable pain.”
“Jay, what are you saying?” I forgot all about the microphone.
“I’m saying I love you. I love you in the depths of my soul,” he said, his voice now quivering. “My love for you is captured in every beautiful memory of our past, detailed in vivid visions of our dreams and future plans, but most of all it’s right now, in the moment where everything I’ve ever wanted in my life is sitting right in front of me. I know I’ve made mistakes, but if you give me the chance, I will spend the rest of my life making up for that. If you want kids, I’ll give you a house full of kids. If you want us to walk away from all things Lovejoy, I’ll do that. Just please don’t leave me, Shannon.”
Tears started streaming down my cheeks. I felt like my mind was playing tricks on me.
“One of our callers told us everything happens for a reason,” Jay continued. “I believe that from the bottom of my heart. Everything we’ve been through these past few weeks has been so that I could appreciate the woman I married, and remember the reason God brought us together. I just realized my greatest joy comes when I’m making your heart smile. I can’t lose you, baby.”
“I don’t want to lose you either,” I cried as I removed my headphones and bolted from my seat and into my husband’s arms as he stood.
It wasn’t until we saw half the radio station standing in the control room, clapping and crying, that I even remembered we were still on the air.
I pointed to the mic. “Jay…”
“Oh, man,” he said, jumping back into his seat. “Sorry about that, everyone, but my wife and I got caught up for a minute.” He looked at me and smiled. “That’s all our time for now.”
I slid back into my seat, leaned into the microphone, sniffling and wiping my tears. “Thank you for joining us… and make sure you live, laugh, and love.” I turned to face my husband as our theme music filled the studio. “Because that’s exactly what I plan to do,” I said, as Jay rose, took me into his arms, and squeezed me like he never wanted to let go.
We were interrupted by a tap on the glass from the control room.
“Hey, guys,” Nicole said. “I hate to interrupt this beautiful moment, but there’s one more caller insisting on talking to you.”
“We’re off the air,” Jay said.
“I know, but he’s insisting and said that you’ll want to talk to him.”
Jay and I exchanged confused glances as Jay eased over to patch the call through.
“Hello,” I said.
“Hi, sweetheart. It’s Ivan calling about my money…. I hope you didn’t think I forgot….”