I stood in the small doorway as Jay walked away.
Two beautiful angels just walked in, both with curly blond hair and amethyst eyes.
“Delphina,” I whispered. At that moment, I knew something was changing for me. Here, in my studio, was the girl I had fantasized about since I was fifteen.
I was struck dumb by the sight in front of me. It’s as if someone superglued my feet to the floor and my lips to one another. I couldn’t walk. I couldn’t talk. I couldn’t even fucking breathe.
I watched as they sat, eyes closed, communicating somehow. Damn it! What I wouldn’t give to be able to read their minds! I needed to figure out what the hell was wrong with me and fast.
Suddenly, the mother began to cry silently. The daughter, my dream, kept looking around the studio as if she were looking for someone. I ducked out of the way every time she looked in my direction. Did she know I was stalking her? With that, they both got up and walked outside.
I felt all the oxygen leave the room as if it was also desperate to follow the two angels. I was suddenly able to gasp for air when I realized they just went to sit out on the porch, probably to soak up some of that beautiful afternoon sun that glistened delightfully off their golden waves.
I wanted desperately to touch her. To make sure she was ok. To make sure she didn’t leave me. But, if I tried to approach her, would she disappear again? Was I really awake or was this some sick, twisted version of my dreams.
“Jay!” I yelled, still keeping my eyes glued to the woman sitting just outside the front window.
“Sup, Jonah?” Jay responded as he ambled closer to me. I could tell he was concerned for me.
“Did you sign them up?”
“Ahh, I signed the mother up two days ago, yes. She said she was also signing up for her daughter as a surprise,” he explained, still obviously nervous about my current state of duress.
“What was her name?” My question was barely a whisper. I was still breathing hard. Still stunned at the sight of these women in my territory.
“Dude, you’re kinda worrying me. I knew you’d want to see her because of the color of her eyes, but why are you acting all weird. Just go talk to her.”
“Jay?” My tone was a clear warning. “Name. I need a name.”
“Shit, Jonah. Ok. Let me go get the membership file,” he said as he gestured toward the file cabinet and started to make his way over there. About fucking time.
“Delphina Hugh,” he hollered from across the room.
“Shhh! Shit, Jay! They’re still here. I don’t want them to know I’m digging for information.”
“Damn it, Jonah. Tell me what the hell is going on!” Jay demanded, getting right up into my face and blocking my view of her.
“Okay. Okay. You’re taking off for lunch in about ten minutes, right?”
“Yeah. Well, I’m actually taking off for the rest of the day. Eve was going to cover for me,” he explained.
“Alright. I remember now. Are you going home before heading to your parents’ house?”
He just nodded and raised his eyebrow as he crossed his arms in a questioning stance.
“When you get to the apartment, go into my room and take a look at the drawing on my easel. Then, call me. Or, don’t call me, unless you want to. But, you’re going to want to.”
“Well, in that case, I’m leaving now,” he said as he grabbed his keys out of his pocket. “This better be good, Chantrey!” he demanded with a pointer finger in my direction.
Luckily, Eve showed up just a few minutes later, effectively saving me from needing to interact with the woman who caused my heart to turn to putty.
Jay knew about my obsession with purple and especially with purple eyes. But, he did not know the extent of my fixation. I have not shared all of my dreams with him—only the ones represented in my sketchbooks—and none from the past month that have become so greatly detailed.
The girls came in from the porch; my love lightly wiping her face as if she were crying. I would give anything to keep that look of sorrow from her face.
She was thinner than I had imagined and I noticed she walked with a slight limp. It wasn’t extremely obvious, and would probably go unnoticed by most. But I watched every step she took. Every move she made was thoroughly examined by my eyes. She seemed... weak. In my dreams, she was always so strong. But now, as her mother helped gather up some clay and tools, she appeared more fragile and meek.
Five minutes hadn’t even passed and Jay’s number lit up on my screen. Quickly ducking into the other room, I answered the call.
“What the hell is going on, Jonah?” Jay practically yelled into the phone.
“She’s the girl, Jay. She’s the girl with the amethyst eyes from my dreams,” I explained calmly, although I was anything but.
“You have got to be fucking kidding me,” Jay mumbled, obviously realizing just how serious this was. “Wait a minute. I thought you said you had never met the girl from your dreams.”
“I haven’t. I drew that picture from my dream three nights ago. Up until now, I didn’t even know she actually existed beyond what I concocted in my mind.”
All I could hear was Jay’s manic breathing through the phone. He was speechless for once in his fucking life and I didn’t blame him. I just dropped a huge bomb on someone who is not of the soul-seer world. I had to be careful what I shared or face retribution from the council.
“Jonah,” Jay finally spoke. “I don’t know what the hell is going on and now I wish I wasn’t going out of town. Are you going to be okay? I know we men like to bottle up our feelings, but this is serious shit, dude! Do you need me to stay?”
“Hell no. Go have fun with your family. I actually think I will visit my dad tonight. He knows of my dreams and he has already seen the drawing. As a matter of fact, he told me he went to school with a woman who looked like the girl in the drawing, which is why I was demanding to know her name. He knows Delphina.”
Just as the words spilled out of my mouth, I realized I said way too much. He’s a mortal for Christ’s sake and I just told him my dad knows the mother of the girl I obsess about in my dreams? Yeah... even I have a hard time following it and I expect a mortal to understand.
“Ok... this is, like, weird John Edward type of shit. You know, that psychic dude?”
“I’ve heard of John Edward and if I were dreaming about a dead person, then I’d say you’re right. But, she’s obviously alive and well and I don’t know how the hell I’m going to approach her,” I said with all honesty. I’d already put so much on him—what’s one more admission to seal my fate?
“Well, don’t start your introduction off with the fact you dream of her. Just be your charming self.” I could tell Jay was actually trying to be helpful for once.
“Thanks, Jay. Drive safe, ok? I’ll text you later to update you.”
*****
Later that evening, I cursed myself for not approaching her. I couldn’t believe I was such a nancy. In my defense, every time I followed her in my dreams, she up and vanished, leaving my mind in an emotional state of panic. What’s to say that wouldn’t happen in reality?
I was pacing in my father’s study, waiting, dying, for him to get home. I needed to talk to him. He was the only one I could talk to.
Finally, his study door creaked open and he walked in. About fucking time!
He looked tired and a bit rundown, like he had a hard day at work.
“Dad!” I yelled, hearing my voice crack like an adolescent boy going through puberty. I cleared my throat to suppress the anxiety that was obvious in my voice. “Dad, you look tired. I’m sorry to surprise you like this, but it’s important.”
“I could tell by the million text messages and missed phone calls I received from you within the past four hours. I am sorry I did not respond. Today has been long and... just... long.”
My dad hardly ever lost his words. He really must be tired. But, this was way more important. I couldn’t help but force my emotional issues upon my dad.
“I’m sorry, Dad, but this is really, really important. She is real. She exists. I met her today. Well, I didn’t really meet her. I wussed out. I was scared and confused and... she... Oh my God, Dad. She is so much more beautiful than even my dreams could convey. She...”
He cut me off. “Wait a minute! You saw her? You really saw her today?”
Now the life was showing in his eyes again. Now he’s getting it!
“Yes! Her and her mother came into the studio. They’re new members. Jay only got her mother’s name. It’s Delphina Hugh, Dad! Her daughter was with her today. Oh, how I wish I didn’t have this mental block going on. I wanted so badly to hear what she was thinking.” I finally quieted as I saw my dad staring at me. “What?”
“This is the happiest I have seen you in many, many years, Jonah,” he said, with emotion oozing from his tone. Oh, boy.
“I am happy. Well, I will be even happier once I get the guts to approach her. But, the fact that I’m not cracked? The fact that she’s actually real? Oh, that makes me practically euphoric!”
“I bet,” he said with a smile.
“So, I take it you didn’t get in touch with Delphina Hugh since you’re just now hearing this from me?” I asked, worried my dad would probably fall over from exhaustion right where he stood.
He shook his head as he sat on the small sofa. “No. I did try to look her up but only came up with her sister, Sybil. She was always a pushy person and way too overly-promiscuous for me to be comfortable around her. If I reached out to Sybil, I would never get rid of her. Plus, I really wanted to contact Del directly instead of through her family. From what I recall, her family does not know of her gifts. She was a rare child that had to find out about her clairvoyance on her own because neither of her parents possessed the soul-seer genes.”
“Well, that’s odd. That’s not... uh... is that even possible?”
“No, which is why Del found out later that her mom must have had a fling. The last I spoke to Delphina, she did not know who her father was.”
I just nodded. That must suck to find out one of your parents was unfaithful and resulted in your birth. Of course, Delphina looked like a strong person. I’m sure she handled it with grace and beauty. She really was beautiful. But, not nearly as beautiful as her daughter.
“So, did you find out her name?” my dad asked, bringing me out of my thoughts and back to the present.
“Ahh, no. Not yet anyway. But, I’m determined to find out soon enough.” Then I remembered what happened with Jay and thought I should ask for my dad’s advice. “Um, Dad? Jay was there when Delphina and her daughter showed up. Let’s just say, I didn’t handle it well. He saw the raw reaction I had and demanded to know what was up. I’ve never really told him about... her. He knows I dream of purple eyes on an occasion, but he never knew the extent of it. So, when I clearly wore my heart on my sleeve, I told him to go home and look at the drawing from the other night. I think he’s a bit freaked out now.”
At that bit of information, my dad let out a roaring laugh and grabbed his belly as he chuckled. “I bet he is freaked! You pretty much just told him you dreamed, in detail, about a girl that you have never met until today. He is probably packing his things right now!”
“Damn it. Don’t say that,” I said with a sigh. “You don’t think a slip like that would get me in trouble, do you?”
“You know that boy would never leave you over something like this. I was just joking, Jonah. But, you need to explain to him to keep a lid on this. You do not need to go into detail about your abilities, especially since you cannot prove them at the moment. But, at least explain you would like the dreams to stay quiet, especially with your increase in recognition within the art world. Do not mention any of our hierarchy and laws. Play the dumb card.”
“You’re right. I didn’t even think of that. He’s visiting with his parents tonight, but he’ll be back tomorrow morning. I’ll talk to him then.”
My dad just nodded and I could tell how tired he really was. I told him he should get some rest and that I would check in with him tomorrow. He also surprised me with the fact that my mom bought me two new pillows, already cased and waiting on my bed at the apartment. I realized then I hadn’t been home since leaving my mom with the feathery mess the day before.
*****
That night, in my apartment, I framed and hung the drawing of my love. At the bottom, I wrote the only word I could think of. The name I gave my studio in her honor. Lavendine.