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“YOU’RE AWFUL QUIET, Sutherland. You okay?”
Joseph’s tender voice broke through the haze of my depressing, woe-is-me thoughts. I couldn’t even tear my gaze away from the starry night outside my window for fear I’d break down. I took a deep breath and blew it all out before choosing my words.
“Yeah, I’m fine. Just wish there was some way to save Grandma’s house. She’s not even taking her stuff with her,” I added in frustration. “How can she walk away from all her precious possessions?”
“Maybe they’re not as precious to her as you think. Maybe they’re reminders of who she used to be. A wife. A mother. A grandmother to you. Taking them with her might only hark back to a place and time she’d rather be. Sometimes parting from everything you’ve ever known is easier than bringing it all with you. Clean slate, you know?”
Joseph’s words did little to soothe my aching heart. In time, I’d probably look back on his wise words and realize just how sensible they were. Right now, I was content to sulk.
“Hey,” he said, stretching his arm toward me. “Come here. Slide over.”
Reluctantly, I unbuckled and skimmed across the seat toward him. After securing the other seatbelt, his strong arm tugged me closer until my body nestled right against his. I leaned my head on the pocket of his shoulder and relished the security I felt in his embrace. Just nestled up to him made a world of difference to my mood.
“Thanks for all you did this weekend,” I finally said. “You have no idea how much it all means to me.”
“I’ve got a pretty good idea.”
I heard the smile in his voice without looking up. Joseph’s handsome smiling face had been the one thing that struck me on the day we first met and it would forever be the warm sunshine on all my cloudy days. “I know I didn’t say much about our date last night, but I hope you know how happy you made me. No one’s ever done anything remotely close to that. The lights, the dinner, the dancing...I’ll never forget it, Joseph.”
“Neither will I. Speaking of,” he said, reaching into his coat. “I believe this is yours.”
I watched him pull out a CD case from his breast pocket and hand it to me. I smiled as I held my Frank Sinatra greatest hits—the one he stole from my apartment. “Oh yeah, I almost forgot about it.” I had to laugh as I remembered how he’d waltzed into my bedroom uninvited and begged me to just get in the truck with him. To trust him enough that he’d make everything all better. Little did he know I’d trust him enough to walk through broken glass, if he needed me to.
“Why don’t you put it in, DJ? We could use a little pick-me-up right now.”
I plucked the CD from its housing and slipped it in. Ol’ Blue Eyes started singing one of my favorite tunes and I snuggled back into my spot under Joseph’s arm. Nothing else was said as we made our way up I-75 North and that was fine with me. I think after all that had happened to us in the past twenty-four hours, we both welcomed the peace and quiet.
As we finally crossed the Brent Spence Bridge, the downtown lights of Cincinnati, combined with the nostalgic Sinatra melodies playing in the background, welcomed me home. As much as I loved visiting with my grandmother, the sight of familiar landmarks brought an unspoken sense of comfort to me. The PCN Tower, the Great American Tower with its top inspired by Princess Diana’s tiara, the Carew Tower, and so many other architectural wonders of the Queen City lit up the night. They stood proud and tall as if saluting my safe return.
Weaving through Cinci’s streets, Joseph gave my body a little squeeze. “You asleep? We’re almost home.”
Hearing him say that made it sound like we shared a home—which we did in a sense since we lived in the same apartment complex. But my brain took it further. I liked the sound of living with Joseph, though I’d never mention such a thing to him. Previous relationship faux pas warned me of that mistake, and I’d be darned if I was going to give Joseph a reason to back out now.
“No, I’m not asleep. But I’m ready to.”
He parked the truck in the side lot and killed the engine. Without hesitation, he leapt from his seat and held out his arms for me. I retrieved my purse from the floorboards and slid across, taking his hand. I heard the hard slam of the door and the beep-beep of the lock mechanism engage before he wrapped his arm around my shoulder. We walked together into the building and stepped onto the elevator.
I looked up at Joseph after he pressed the button for our floor and the doors closed. For a few seconds, we were shut away from the rest of the world, except for maybe the guy on the other end of the hidden camera. He turned his head and smiled down at me. “What?”
“Caroline is so wrong about you,” I said. “You’ve got the biggest heart of any man I’ve ever known.”
His deep chuckle echoed around me. “Glad you think so. And while we’re on the subject of Caroline...I’ll be changing my locks this week. We don’t need another surprise visit from her.”
I was relieved he’d go to such lengths to keep Caroline from entering his life again. It proved to be a very bold act of finality on his part. And I was ever so happy for it. “You think that’ll keep her from trying?”
The elevator doors opened and we stepped out, still in conversation as we walked down the hallway. “It’ll be a start. Maybe she’ll finally take the hint.”
I baited him before I realized the impact of my words. “And that would be...?”
We stopped at my door and he leaned his shoulder against the wall. That cool casualness of Joseph’s demeanor returned as he crossed his arms and gazed upon me with a shrewd grin. “That I’ve moved on. That I’ve found someone who makes me happy and accepts me for who I am.”
I looked away. Anywhere besides the lure of his handsome face. He was right. I didn’t take compliments well. I dug in my purse for my keys.
“Allow me,” he said, pulling his large ring of superintendent’s keys from his coat pocket. With quick precision, he found and inserted the correct key in the door. He turned the door knob, swung the door open, and gestured for me to enter.
I flipped on my lights and turned around to face him. “Thanks for a wonderful weekend.”
“It’s not over yet.”
I smiled at his attempt to stretch the night a few hours longer. “Well, if it’s all right with you, I’d like to be alone for a while.” Which really meant turn in early. Eat a whole pint of ice cream. Cry myself to sleep. The usual female eccentricities.
He nodded casually and shoved his thumbs in his pockets. “Sure. Whatever you want.”
I began taking off my coat, but he snagged the sleeve and pulled me to him. His long arms trapped me in a comforting hug, his mouth turning up in a scheming smile. “Realize if you decide you need company, or if your room gets drafty, I’m right next door. You could always sleep walk your way over to mine.”
My laughter mingled with his, though I imagined he wasn’t necessarily joking. “I appreciate the offer, but I’m pretty certain I’ll be warm enough in my own bed.”
“Can’t blame a guy for trying, right?”
“I’ll give you points for effort.” I relished the way he looked at me with such want. I could never tire of it.
“Are you busy tomorrow?” he asked, taking another swing in the batter’s box.
“No, why?”
He crinkled his nose in a frown. “I’m a little behind with my Christmas shopping, and considering how well you chose Candace’s tree—which by the way, she loved—I thought maybe you could help me buy gifts for the family.”
“You want me to go Christmas shopping with you?” I had to ask because, frankly, I was a bit surprised.
For one, men didn’t seem to enjoy that kind of thing. I often recalled my father and brother-in-law grumbling on Christmas Eve about the crowds, the rudeness of so-called gift-givers ripping sale items right from a person’s grasp, and the fact that it was ultimately a waste of time given their wives would return whatever they picked out anyway.
Secondly, Christmas shopping as a couple projected all the signs of a committed relationship. Surprise, surprise. My pessimism crept forward. I couldn’t help it.
“Yes, I do,” he reassured. “I could use your help—if that sounds like something you wouldn’t mind doing on a Sunday afternoon.”
I’d give this man a lifetime of Sundays. “I’d love to. What time you thinking?”
“Noonish?” he pitched. “We’ll grab some lunch first and maybe head up to Kenwood?”
“Sounds good to me.”
“Great.” His gleaming smile met his Montana-blue eyes. Mesmerized by the intensity of his gaze, I watched with eager anticipation as his mouth neared mine. He stopped just short of my lips, his arms hugging me tighter against his chest. “Sleep well, Sutherland.”
Our mouths touched and my knees buckled. Ice cream and a good cry no longer held their appeal. Josephs’ kiss was much better for the soul. Beyond compare. No denying, the man knew exactly what he was doing when it came to physical touch. His hands, his lips, the way his body moved forward and connected with mine in all the right places. Every part of him worked together in perfect harmony to deliver the best kiss imaginable.
He smiled as he pulled away and stepped out of my embrace. He backed up into the hall, clenching his jaw as he held my gaze. The look on his face displayed the pain he endured at parting from me. I wondered myself how long I could keep up this charade of celibacy. It had been a long time since I’d wanted a man this badly. Heck, it had been a long time since I’d had any kind of desire—period. And Joseph, with all his chivalrous qualities and drop-dead gorgeousness, only made it twice as hard to resist that temptation.
“Goodnight, Jamie.”
I sighed and nodded in disappointment. It was best that I let him leave, though my entire body screamed otherwise. I stepped forward and clung to the door, forcing myself to close it. “Goodnight, Joseph. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
I heard a small, manly groan escape him, though I know it wasn’t meant for my ears. Until I heard his door open and close, I held mine open just a crack in case he changed his mind.
I waited to the count of five. No such luck.
