A lone mosquito poked at its reflection in the night garden’s birdbath, and lights lining the gravel walkways attracted a small entourage of playful moths.
“Did your parents ever explain sex to you?” Olivia asked.
“My dad was too freaked out to talk about it until I was in my teens,” Maureen said. “But when I was eight years old, my mom called it ‘baking the dough.’ I was so confused. I thought the Pillsbury Doughboy was having sex whenever my mom baked one of his cakes.” Maureen offered Olivia the last pepperoni on her slice of pizza. “What about your parents?” she asked.
Olivia dipped the pepperoni into a cup of pizza sauce. “When I was ten, they first tried to explain it to me by calling it the ‘birds and the bees.’ And my mama had these crazy names for body parts. Breasts were called ‘ta-tas’ and my vagina was my ‘ya-ya.’ But I had too many questions, so they bought a book with pictures and read it to me. You want more of this salad?” Olivia held a bowl across the picnic table.
Yeah, the tomatoes,” Maureen said as she poked her fork in. “When was your first kiss?”
“When I was twelve,” Olivia said, “and it was totally by accident. I tried to tackle Pat’s brother one day when we were playing football in their backyard. We crashed face-first into each other.”
“Your best friend’s brother was your first experience at locking lips?”
“And it was gross! He started crying, and I ran home and brushed my teeth.”
“I had mine in elementary school,” Maureen said. “Her name was Candice Miller. She kissed me one day in the cafeteria after I tied her shoe for her.”
“Was that when you knew you were gay?” Olivia asked as she finished her pizza.
“I worried about it when I was in high school. I knew for sure when I started college.”
“What about your family? Did they ever say anything to you before you knew for sure?”
“Looking back, I think everybody suspected I was gay,” Maureen said. “But they never said a word. I didn’t officially come out until my first year with the Agency.” Maureen wiped her mouth and hands and passed a few napkins to Olivia.
“I was a brash tomboy,” Olivia said. “I knew I liked girls even before I knew what the word homosexual meant.”
“Did your parents know?” Maureen asked.
They knew but never used the word homosexual. Instead, they sat me down after church one day and told me it was okay to be who I was, and that they loved me. So I’ve always been out without making a big announcement.” Olivia closed the pizza box and gave rest of the salad to Maureen. “That was good. We should order one of those again.”
“That was genuine Italian pizza,” Maureen said. “Here, that’s for you.” Maureen handed Olivia a bottled water. “Fireflies before summer,” she said and pointed to the glow bugs gliding over the lilac and honeysuckles.
“I didn’t know this place existed. It’s really nice out here.”
“I know the groundskeeper who’s on duty tonight,” Maureen said as she took off her jacket and folded it across her lap. “It’s kind of warm this evening.”
Olivia looked at the red, silk blouse Maureen was wearing. It fit her nicely and showed a little cleavage where Maureen had undone two buttons. Olivia suddenly thought about Marcus giving her dressing tips.
“Olivia,” Maureen asked, “what kind of relationship are you looking for?”
Olivia cleared her throat. For a moment, she was having a private fantasy about Maureen undoing more buttons on her blouse. “I guess the kind some people call old-fashioned--a monogamous and committed one.”
“Me too. Have you ever been in a bad relationship?”
“How do you mean?” Olivia asked.
“I mean abusive or disrespectful?”
“No. I’ve dealt with enough suspects and victims who have, and I just couldn’t tolerate it personally.” Olivia took off her jacket and hung it over the picnic bench. “Are you asking for a particular reason?”
“I had a couple of college friends who were, and the effects lasted for years. It’s something I couldn’t tolerate either. May I ask a more personal question?”
Olivia saw Maureen’s eyes quickly glance down. She’s checking me out, Olivia thought. “Is it about my choice in shirts? Blame my grandma if you don’t like blue oxfords.”
“I like it. It looks good on you, especially with those slacks.”
Olivia liked Maureen’s answer. “I’ve got one in pink too,” she said. “So what’s your question?’
“What are you looking for sexually?”
Olivia felt here eyes widened.
“I’m sorry. Was that too direct?”
“Don’t apologize. It’s a good question. It’s just that no one’s ever asked me before. Not even Kendra.” Olivia took a deep breath. “I like a natural woman--no artificial appendages or other devices, if you know what I mean.”
Maureen laughed. “I know what you mean. I’m partial to lips and thighs myself. And you?”
“Breasts or ta-tas, as my mama would say.”
They both laughed and watched more fireflies. The groundskeeper strolled by and stopped briefly to brag about the garden. He offered to throw away the pizza box and pointed to several night butterflies floating in the air. Olivia and Maureen watched him leave before they started again. Olivia went first.
“Have you heard the term ‘mutual pleasure’ in a sexual context?” she asked.
“I don’t think so. What is it?”
“It’s when both partners care about pleasing each other.”
“I get it. It’s the opposite of ‘wham bam thank you ma’am’.”
“Right. Are you okay with that?”
“I am. I think sex is what you do with your partner, not what you do to her.”
“Well said. Can I ask a more personal one?”
Maureen smiled. “I think we’re in deep enough that you can ask anything.”
“Okay. When was the last time you had sex?”
“Does that exclude pleasing myself?” Maureen asked without missing a beat.
“Whoa! I didn’t see that one coming!” Olivia took a long swig of water and wiped her forehead with a napkin. She tried to ignore a flashing image she had created in her head of Maureen masturbating. “Yeah…it excludes that.”
Maureen seemed to stiffen up. “Not since I broke up with Denise. I got to first base with a couple of dates. But...I have to be in love to have sex with someone, and I haven’t been in love in a long time.”
“After Kendra, the most I ever did on dates was hold hands,” Olivia said, “and give a coupon for a free eggroll…good only on Thursdays after five p.m.”
Maureen laughed. “I like your sense of humor, Olivia, and I want one of those coupons.”
“Do you want to be in love again?” Olivia asked. She could see Maureen’s shoulders relax.
“I do. Very much.”
The conversation paused as the crickets started their nightly chant. The chirping grew louder until interrupted by the groundskeeper turning on sprinklers that gently showered a collection of lemon lilies.
“My grandma would be jealous if she saw this place,” Olivia said.
“It’s awesome. Nice flowers too.” Maureen nodded to the lemon lilies.
Olivia glanced at them. “Is yellow still your new favorite color?” she asked.
“Yes, and the lilies still look as fresh as the first day.”
“My whole squad room took over my roses. Marcus even had the nerve to put them on his desk.”
“Sounds like something Carol would do at my office,” Maureen said as she extended her legs underneath the table. She accidentally kicked Olivia. “Oh, excuse me, Olivia.”
Olivia noticed that Maureen had slipped off her shoes and was barefoot. “Good to see you’re not ready to leave. I have one more question.”
“I’m all ears.”
“How do you feel about taking an HIV test if I take one too?” Olivia felt a twinge of nerves after asking. Was she being presumptuous? It was only their third date.
Maureen extended her legs again and let her bare feet rest on top of Olivia’s. “I’m okay with that. Knowing we’re both okay could make ‘mutual pleasure’ even better.”
Olivia saw a sparkle in Maureen’s eyes that made Olivia hot all over. “You’re right. It is kind of warm this evening,” she said and bucked her water bottle.
The crickets chimed in again and continued non-stop. Olivia and Maureen listened for a moment and talked more about their prior loves. Olivia shared with Maureen how she felt the day Kendra announced that she wasn’t ready for a commitment. Olivia still couldn’t understand how someone who seemed to love her could keep her true feelings hidden. Maureen also had had a partner who didn’t tell her that her feelings had changed.
“I had another wonderful time,” Maureen said as she slid her loafers back on.
“Me too, and I added this garden to my favorites list.”
“Want to do it again on Saturday?”
“Absolutely,” Olivia said. “We can do a daytime picnic in Goslyn, and I’ll ask my grandma to pack us a lunch. You’ll add her to your favorites list once you taste what that woman can do with tomatoes.”
***
Olivia wiped shower steam from the bathroom mirror and dried her back. She lotioned her arms and legs and massaged her breasts before putting on her favorite terry cloth robe--a gift from Pat who had swiped it from a hotel during a family vacation in Hawaii.
Olivia couldn’t stop thinking about Maureen as she went to the living room and turned on the radio. The DJ was playing his regular Quiet Storm session and had just cued up a classic by
Gladys Knight and the Pipps. Gladys sang If I Were Your Woman as Olivia went to her bedroom and lay across her bed with her robe wide open. She massaged her breasts again and looked at the closet door. That’s where she kept the vibrator--second shelf, tucked underneath an old college tie-dyed blanket. She laughed at herself. “I’ve got to change the batteries in that thing.” She then ran her fingers over her clitoris and held her hand there. She closed her eyes as an unshakeable image of Maureen doing the same danced in her head. She wondered if Maureen had the same thoughts about her.
“God, what am I thinking?” She rolled onto her side and hugged her pillow. “It’s only been three dates.” It was also too soon to expect anything other than a good meal and good conversation that coming Saturday.
Still, Olivia liked Maureen’s frank talk about sex. She also wanted what Maureen wanted--a faithful and committed partner. That was a lot to feel good about even if it was just a third date.
“What the hell, you only live once.” Olivia got up and slid on a pair of sweats and a T-shirt. She was making a trip to the local Walgreens. As she put on her jacket, the DJ announced the next slow jam--Sexual Healing by Marvin Gaye. Olivia rolled her eyes. “Size double-A batteries, here I come.”