I flopped down on the couch and turned on the TV, needing a distraction from everything that had happened lately: the coma, Nolan returning to Northbridge, the amnesia, falling in love with him even more than before, the attack, Nolan leaving, his relationship with Alyssa, Chris’s death…
To sum it up, I needed a distraction from life.
On the screen, a mob of people stood behind a roped-off area. The picture then flashed to a limo and Michael Seger, one of the sexiest actors around, appeared from it.
His fans spotted him and the intensity of their frenzied shrieks jumped up a notch. He waved at the crowd, further exciting them. The guy should come with a warning: Caution: risk of ringing ears when you stand too close to my fans.
“What’s all the screaming for?” Kayla handed me a soda and made herself at home on the other end of the couch.
“Michael Seger. Who else would it be?”
She threw me a look. “Oh, I don’t know. Your boyfriend’s pretty hot too.”
“Nolan isn’t my boyfriend. News flash: in case you haven’t noticed, he’s back in L.A. now.” With Alyssa.
“That’s only ’cause you didn’t have the guts to go with him. And if he isn’t your boyfriend, then why did you turn down that guy who called to take you out for coffee?” She meant Craig, the man I’d met the day Nolan stopped to fix the flat tire for the man’s grandmother.
“Because I didn’t feel like going out with him.” My heart wouldn’t have been into it, and it wouldn’t have been fair to let him believe he had a chance with me. “And because Nolan didn’t ask me,” I said, responding to her first comment about me not going to L.A. with him.
“Ask you what? To marry you?” The exasperation in her tone surprised me.
“No, but I didn’t want to move there if I had no idea if he wanted to be my boyfriend for real. I didn’t want to give up my job for nothing.”
“So why didn’t you ask him?”
Right. Like I was going to do that. I wasn’t one of those people who got off on rejection. Although in retrospect, it couldn’t have hurt any worse than it did now.
“I’m serious, Hailey. Instead of moping around feeling sorry for yourself, you should ask him if he wants you to move to L.A. to be with him.”
“In case you haven’t noticed, he’s dating Alyssa Graham.”
She shrugged in a way that said, You know they’re not dating for real. Or maybe they officially were now. Everyone, according to the media and fan sites, agreed they made a gorgeous couple.
“Oh my God,” Kayla breathed, her eyes wide as she gaped at the TV.
I turned to see what was wrong. The entertainment news was still on the same event, but now the reporter was interviewing Nolan and Alyssa.
My heart practically stopped beating at the sight of him. It was the first time I’d seen him in a tux, and wow wasn’t enough of a word to describe how hot he looked in it. And when combined with his sexy smile, there wasn’t a single fan at the event who wasn’t swooning. Nolan normally looked mouthwatering in his usual faded jeans and body-hugging T-shirts, but Nolan in a tux was beyond rocker-boy sexy.
And that only made my heart hurt more.
“Not to be crass or anything,” Kayla said, still staring at the TV, “but I think I just came in my panties from looking at him.”
Despite Nolan being with Alyssa, who looked more gorgeous than I’d thought was possible (a fact that wasn’t lost on my poor heart), I chuckled. “I’m sure your boyfriend would appreciate hearing that.”
Kayla made a scoffing sound. “Are you telling me you didn’t just cream your panties?”
I wrinkled my nose at her words, even though she was right. “Shhh. I want to hear what they’re saying.” Because I needed to torture myself a little more.
“Hi, Alyssa,” the tall, skinny redhead said in that annoying way some entertainment reporters had about them. Like they considered themselves equals to the big name celebrity, when most of the time the celebrities had no idea who they were. “Megan Keyes with We Talk. You look absolutely gorgeous. As always.”
Alyssa smiled. The warmth to it made her even more breathtaking. It really wasn’t fair. “Thank you, Megan.”
“And you…” The redhead looked uncertain what to call Nolan. Some fans and reporters now referred to him by his real name. Others stuck with Tyler. Which meant Nolan hadn’t decided yet, or else the record label would’ve already issued a statement as to which name he was now going by.
“You can call me Nolan.”
He glanced at Alyssa. She beamed at him, and he smiled back, further confirming they were officially a couple.
My insides tightened even though this wasn’t news. I just hated the constant reminders.
“Nolan,” Megan said, “you look particularly yummy.” To Alyssa she added, a knowing grin on her face, “You have very good taste.” She then asked a few questions about the film before the golden couple had to move on.
Alyssa waved to a group of screaming teenage girls holding banners that proclaimed NOLYSSA, WE LOVE YOU and NOLYSSA FOREVER!
I groaned at the name. It was just as bad as the last one. And seriously, what was it with giving celebrity couples idiotic monikers? We didn’t give them to normal couples. No one went around referring to Kayla and Dylan as Dylayla. She’d probably slug me if I tried.
“Kiss her!” someone yelled. Alyssa leaned in and kissed Nolan’s cheek. The fans screamed their appreciation. As much as I wanted to think of them as stupid, they weren’t. They’d been sucked into the lie as much as the rest of us had been.
Neither Kayla nor I said anything, the truth sinking in about the status of the golden couple’s relationship. As I stared numbly at the screen, Kayla theorized what was really going on between them. She even threw in a few alien-related theories that made me laugh. God, I loved her.
“You know what I think you should do?” she said.
“Make popcorn?” Then we could watch a movie. Preferably one not starring Alyssa, and one without any hint of romance. A terrifying psychological thriller would be good right about now.
“Go to L.A.”
I liked my popcorn idea better. “And why would I do that?”
“Have you told Nolan that you love him? And I don’t mean as a friend.”
“He told me I was his heart and soul and, well…” What exactly had I said when he told me that?
Nothing. I’d kissed him, but that was it. Yes, I’d thought about how he was my heart and soul too, but I hadn’t actually said the words. I wasn’t sure if they meant the same to him as they meant to me. Maybe that was why I’d been hesitant to believe he was declaring his love for me. More than likely, in guy talk, he’d been hoping to have sex with me again.
“I kissed him,” I said.
Kayla’s mouth flopped open. She blinked. “Shit, girl. The guy says he loves you and you’re sitting on this couch, hanging out with me, when you should be in L.A. with him.”
“One, he didn’t say he loves me.” Except he did, in the note he’d left the morning he returned to L.A.
Kayla threw me a look to tell me I was an idiot. I couldn’t disagree with her there. There was a small chance she was right. A very small chance.
Kayla continued giving me the look.
Okay, a big chance.
“It was implied in his words,” she said. “In case it’s skipped your notice, Hailey, he’s a musician. And musicians are more poetic than your typical male.” She threw her hands up. “I swear, sometimes you’re as dense about these things as Dylan.”
Ignoring her outburst, I went on. “Two, the record label is pushing for this relationship between Nolan and Alyssa, to save his reputation and to help the band become even bigger. A bad-boy reputation can only get you so far in the industry.” A similar reputation had killed several promising careers in the past few years. Those musicians had never been heard of again. I didn’t want that to happen to Nolan.
Kayla gave me the you’re-an-idiot look again. If she wasn’t careful, it might become permanently etched on her face. And her boyfriend might not appreciate that. “Right. Because everyone knows that celebrity relationships last.”
I folded my arms. “Theirs could.” Hell, why was I defending their relationship?
Kayla snorted. “You’re right. His touring schedule and her movie schedule will be super-conducive to a solid relationship. The record label’s stupid if it thinks their relationship—fake or real—will last and help Nolan’s reputation in the long run. The paparazzi will be constantly hounding them, ready to do anything to poke holes in their relationship. That will be enough to destroy it. Happens all the time.”
I laughed. “Tell me what you really think.”
She shrugged. “I just think you and the label are wrong. Nolan doesn’t need a celebrity girlfriend to save his reputation. He needs a sweet, loving, down-to-earth girlfriend. A girlfriend who isn’t constantly in the spotlight.”
“But I’ve already been in the spotlight,” I pointed out.
“That’s only because you, in the eyes of the paparazzi and fans, tried to destroy what Nolan and Alyssa supposedly had between them. But think about it. How many non-celebrity boyfriends, girlfriends, or spouses end up in the tabloids? None of them. Not unless they do something illegal or immoral that drags their celebrity lover into their mess. I don’t care what you believe. You’re perfect for Nolan’s reputation.”
She was right. But…“I’m not sure the label will see it that way.”
“The label isn’t what’s important. Nolan should have a say in who he’s dating, not the label. Look, all I’m saying is you need to go to L.A. and tell him how you feel. Tell him you love him and tell him that you’re willing to move there to be with him.” I opened my mouth to speak, but she didn’t give me a chance to say anything. “I know you’re scared of being hurt again, but you need to do this or else you’ll spend the rest of your life wondering what if.”
I released a long, slow breath. “You’re right. But it’ll have to wait until he’s finished recording his album. The last thing he needs is for me to go to L.A. now and disturb him.” Kayla opened her mouth, no doubt to argue against what I was saying. I raised my hand to stop her. “No, it has to be my way. This album’s important to him and the band. If I’m gonna do this, it’s not at the risk of that.”
While my romantic-at-heart best friend would have preferred that I rush to L.A. in some grand gesture, she nodded, seeing I wouldn’t budge on this point. No matter what happened between me and Nolan, his music career came first. He’d worked so hard and defied all kinds of odds to get where he was. I wouldn’t take it away from him. He deserved everything and more.
My phone played a generic tune. I glanced at the number but didn’t recognize it. I accepted the call. “Hello?”
“Is this the slut who’s trying to steal Tyler Erickson away from the sweetest person alive?” The menace in her voice caused the air in my lungs to stop moving. I quickly hung up on her and stared at the phone as if it had turned into a viper.
“What’s wrong?” Kayla asked. I barely heard her over the pulse pounding in my ears.
“Hailey?” She waved her hand in front of my face, breaking my trance.
I swallowed. Hard. “That was a member of the Nolyssa fan club.”
Kayla’s eyebrows drew together, forming deep crevasses. “What did she say?”
“She asked if I was the slut who was trying to steal Tyler away from Alyssa.” I figured there was no point telling Kayla exactly what the fan had said about Alyssa. She was already angry enough as it was.
“You’re fucking kidding me!”
I shared her sentiment. “I don’t even know how she found my number. It’s not like I give it to everyone I meet.” Although who knew what I’d done during those five days I still didn’t remember.
Kayla narrowed her eyes at me. “Don’t even think it.”
“Think what?” I gulped down some soda, stalling.
“You’re going to use this call from some crazed fan to avoid telling Nolan the truth.”
Kayla knew me too well. But really, who could blame me? This wasn’t the life I’d signed up for. I didn’t do well having people hate me. I’d always done things to avoid that. And for good reason.
“This wasn’t a fan who wrote a comment on a fan site,” I reminded her. “She tracked down my number. She might not have found out where I live or work, but that doesn’t mean someone else can’t. Someone who is even more pissed off at me.”
The lines on Kayla’s forehead deepened. “You need to tell Nolan.”
I shook my head. “No, he doesn’t need to know about this. And you can’t tell Brandon either.” Because he would tell Nolan.
“Then tell the police.”
“And what are they going to do? It was one phone call. It’s not like she threatened my life.” Nor was it linked to what had happened to me and Chris in Northbridge. That was their bigger priority. They wouldn’t care about some crazed Nolyssa fan.
Not unless she was connected to the attack and murder.