Chapter Nine

“Okay, I’m ready,” Sarah said.

Cade picked up a lousy bottle of whiskey from the grocery shelf and turned around to see Sarah standing there with at least five different bags of assorted chips, some toiletries for both of them, and a big smile on her face. He found himself smiling back. If they were dating, he’d think she was the most easily pleased woman he’d ever been on a date with. They were in a gas station convenience store after deciding they needed snacks and supplies and she looked as though she were holding an armful of gold. “Great. We just need to add some chocolate to that pile and water,” he said, making his way to the refrigerated section.

“I didn’t know you liked chocolate,” Sarah said, the excitement lining her voice making him wonder what could possibly be interesting about what he’d just said.

He placed two one-liter bottles of water on the checkout counter along with the whiskey and then stepped back to take in the assortment of chocolate on the shelf below. “Yeah, chocolate is my weakness. Lasagna, too, but I’m not getting that here.”

“There’s no competing with Lainey’s,” she said.

He picked up three different bars and then turned to her. “Do you want anything else?”

Sarah’s mouth dropped open, and she pushed past him to reach for a bag of candy under the counter. She held it up like a trophy and beamed at him. “Peach Rings! Have you ever had these?”

He shook his head, not understanding the excitement at a bag of candy.

“These are my favorite. I haven’t had them since…well, a long time. I have to get these,” she said, adding the bag to the pile.

“I’ve got this,” he said to the teenager behind the counter.

“No, I’ve got it,” Sarah said, giving him a shove.

He refused to hip-bump her back and placed a twenty on the counter. “Nope, it’s on me.”

“But this road trip was my idea,” she insisted.

“Yeah, well, I eat more than you do.”

“You haven’t seen me with a bag of Peach Rings.”

The clerk let out a giant huff and rolled his eyes as he started scanning the items.

“Fine, well, the hotel room is on me,” Sarah said as the clerk filled a bag with their things.

“We can talk about that,” he said after grabbing the bag and holding the door open for her. The rain fell in straight sheets, and they both ran to the truck. By the time they got in, they were both soaked.

“The one time I actually do my hair, and it rains,” she said.

He shot her a look as he pulled out of the parking lot. “Your hair looks fine. Looks the same.”

She frowned and then turned down the visor, snapping open the mirror. She let out a muffled scream and began finger-combing her hair. “Really? This is how I normally look to you?”

He shrugged and thought it best to keep his eyes on the road ahead. “I don’t really notice hair.”

“I used a curling iron. I had mastered beachy waves. I know this wasn’t how I looked when you picked me up,” she said, glaring at him.

He stared straight ahead, knowing he was going to regret speaking his mind. “You’re beautiful. Beach curls or not.” The long, awkward pause made him think she wasn’t going to say anything back.

“Beach-y waves.”

“Pardon?”

“Nothing. We probably should have packed some clothes or something,” she said, rubbing her hands up and down her arms.

“Cold?”

“Freezing.”

He turned the heat on.

“About all other expenses, I insist on paying. This whole thing was my idea, and I don’t want you having to foot the bill for my adventure.”

“Well, I’m going on the adventure with you.”

“But only because I asked you. Maybe begged. Borderline begging for sure. This is not what you’d be doing right now. I have to insist, Cade. I’ll write it off as a business expense,” she said.

He laughed. “Are we talking business?”

“Have you met with the bookkeeper yet?”

Bookkeeper. Hell. He didn’t want to think about that now. “Next week.”

“Great. We just talked business,” she said with an adorably smug smile.

“You’re an excellent businesswoman,” he said, pulling into the half-filled parking lot of the Highwayman Motel. The H kept blinking, and the M looked like it might fall off any second now.

“This place is perfect,” she said as he parked.

“You really need to get out more, Sarah,” he said as he shut off the ignition.

“I know. This is perfect. One night at the Highwayman. What could go wrong?”

“All right, let’s go,” he said, not wanting to burst her bubble and tell her all the things that could go wrong.

By that point, the rain had turned to a light drizzle. She let out a tiny squeal as she opened her door and hopped out of the truck. He was torn between rolling his eyes and laughing or maybe both. Somehow she got under his skin, and he had this irrational need to want her to be happy. He grabbed their bag of junk food and met her around the front of the truck, where she was staring at the $99 a room per night sign as though it were the Ritz. “This is going to be so great,” she breathed, looking up at him.

Fifteen minutes later, Cade was holding open the door to the motel room for Sarah and wondering how the hell he’d gotten himself into this mess. The double bed loomed large, in his opinion. Typical to roadside motels, which he’d had more than his fair share of experience in, the room was utilitarian but looked reasonably clean and fresh.

“Wait!” he yelled as Sarah looked like she was about to do a backward dive onto the bed. He strode across the room and flung the neatly made comforter off the bed. “I saw this 20/20 documentary years ago about the cleanliness in these places. Fluids neither of us wants to think about are on that.”

She scrunched up her nose and took a step back. At least he’d gotten through to her.

“You can thank me later. Also, don’t touch the remote or go barefoot.”

She lifted her index finger, raising her eyebrows. “Do you have a hazmat suit in your truck?”

He almost laughed, except he was busy placing the remote in the shopping bag from the grocery store. “You know, it’s all fun and games until one of us ends up with some nasty rash.”

“Ew.”

He tossed the protected remote onto the bed. “You’re welcome. This would also be a good time to keep that strawberry hand sanitizer around.”

She rolled her eyes. “Okay, well, I’m going to wash up. We’re allowed to use the bathroom, right?”

He shrugged. “I’d advise against touching the door handle once you’ve washed your hands.”

For some reason, she thought this was funny, because an endearing smile took over her face and her eyes sparkled. “I had no idea you were such a germaphobe.”

He shoved his hands in his pockets. “It’s called reality. Not some kind of phobia.”

“Mm-hmm,” she said as she took off her boots.

“No bare feet on this carpet. Keep your socks on.”

She clasped a hand over her mouth, doing a bad job of hiding her laughter.

He frowned. “What?”

Her smile was wide and so damn carefree that any regret he had in coming here vanished. “I’m just so glad because I thought I was the one with all the issues. You’re making me feel so much better.”

He wasn’t sure whether he was insulted or happy. He rolled his shoulders and walked across the room. “I’m glad I can provide assistance with your lack of self-confidence.”

“Oh, I don’t have self-confidence issues. More of a lack-of-life issue.”

She disappeared into the bathroom, and he let out the deep breath and relaxed his shoulders. He leaned against the dresser, taking in the small room and the reality that he’d agreed to spend the night with Sarah. There was no avoiding the bed. Because the room was so small, there wasn’t any other place to sleep except the hard-back, upright chair by the window. He’d rather saw off his arm with a dull knife than sleep on the carpeted floor, so that left him with no other options.

Sarah emerged from the bathroom a moment later. “Okay, your turn. I’m sure you’ll want to scrub down. You’ll be pleased to know that the towels are fresh and clean.”

“Thanks,” he said.

“I left the toiletries we bought spread out on Kleenexes so they didn’t touch the counter. Also, I accidentally dropped your toothbrush in the toilet, but it was still in the package so I’m sure it’s fine.”

Her eyes were sparkling, and she was barely holding on to that gorgeous smile because her lips kept twitching. She was a horrible liar. And if she’d been any other woman in the world, he’d have crossed the room and kissed her until they were both laughing. But she was Sarah, so hands off. “Thanks. I’ll be sure to return the favor.”

He walked into the bathroom and closed the door, laughing, as she screamed from the other side that she’d been joking.

…

Sarah was pretty sure this was the wildest thing she’d ever done, with the hottest man she’d ever known. Snacks with gluten and sugar and a bottle of whiskey…it may have taken her twenty-six years to get here, but she was certain she was living her best life right now. She just wasn’t sure how this was all going to pan out. There was a giant bed in the room that wasn’t giant at all. She was pretty sure Cade’s feet would be dangling off the end. And what would Cade sleep in? What would she sleep in? This hadn’t been the most carefully thought-out plan. There was no going back at this point, though.

She leaned against the dresser and quickly messaged Mrs. Casey. After a few stops and starts, she settled on: Mrs. Casey! I met a wonderful friend tonight at the party and decided to spend the night.

There. That wasn’t an outright lie. Cade was becoming a wonderful friend to her and she had decided to spend the night. With him. Before she could even put her phone back in her purse, it vibrated.

I don’t think that’s a wise idea. I urge you to come home at once.

Sorry, I can’t do that. I’m having too much fun. I’m twenty-six, remember? I’ll see you tomorrow; have a good night. Shutting my phone off now…

I will pray for you.

Sarah frowned at the message and dropped her phone in her purse. No more of that thinking now.

She riffled through the bag of snacks and brought it over to the bed. Cade was a little more than her life situation had prepared her for. Maybe a man who was a little less…everything would be a better fit. She looked up as he walked out of the bathroom and strode across the room to the whiskey. Her gaze took in the long, muscular length of him, the stubble on his handsome face…and knew she was in over her head. She needed someone a little less manly. Someone who used strawberry-scented hand sanitizer without giving it a second thought. Someone who didn’t make her squirm with a long stare or with the brush of his hand across hers.

Cade left her breathless. Breathless was dangerous, and she wasn’t quite ready for that level of danger.

He poured them each a glass and handed her one. “To a road-trip detour.”

She clinked her plastic cup to his. “To my first night away from home in ten years.”

He grimaced.

She tilted her head. “Was that too sad?”

He lifted one shoulder. “Slightly. But also, this whiskey is really bad.”

She laughed and raised her glass. “To new friendships.”

Something flashed across his eyes, and she hoped it wasn’t surprise. He’d agreed they were friends, after all. “To new friendships.”

“So what do we do now?”

He shrugged, leaning back against the dresser. “What do you want to do?”

“Me? I don’t know how to have fun, remember? Why don’t you lead the fun charge? What would you do right now for fun?” The second the words escaped her lips, she became frazzled because of how that sounded. What would Cade do for fun? She could imagine all the things he might do for fun with someone else in a hotel room. Well, no, she probably couldn’t imagine all the things, but just the bare few things were enough to make her feel giddy and embarrassed.

He cleared his throat and walked across the room. “How about we find a movie and start eating our way through this pity party of junk?”

She nodded, relieved that he hadn’t answered her question in a different way. “Perfect,” she said, joining him on the bed. He sat on one side of the bed, making a mountain out of the food between them. He looked comfortable enough, with his legs stretched out in front of him and one ankle crossed over the other. The only thing was, it looked as though he went out of his way to make sure they were as far from each other as possible.

He was currently flipping through channels and drinking his whiskey. “What do you want to watch?”

“Any movies?”

He shook his head. “Unfortunately, the Highwayman doesn’t have any new releases.”

He was pointing the shopping-bag-covered remote at the television and mumbling something under his breath as the plastic crinkled.

“Oh, are you having problems through the hermetically sealed plastic?”

He slowly turned to look at her, and she smiled.

He pulled the plastic tighter, and finally the television turned on, the nightly news filling the screen. “Not that. Anything but the news.”

He smirked. “Right. You wanted adult movies.”

Her face burned. “No, I meant”—she cleared her throat—“like, movies. New releases. Not…other things.”

He finished off his whiskey but didn’t turn to her. The television suddenly went black.

“What!”

He groaned and tossed the remote to the foot of the bed. “Well, there goes that idea.”

“I’m sure someone at the front desk will be able to fix this.”

Giving her a look, he rolled over, yanked a tissue from the Kleenex box, and used it to pick up the phone and dial. She held back her laugh when she noticed he didn’t put the receiver right to his ear. She was trying not to notice the forearms that were roped with muscle that led to more muscle as her eyes wandered up the length of his body. She downed her whiskey, even though it may not have been the wisest of moves, but it really seemed like the only move she could make in a situation like this.

He sat up. “So Carl will be over soon. Maybe. If Carl’s wife brings him dinner. If not, he can’t leave the desk. But, according to Carl, his wife is pissed at him for not going home last night. She’s also mad at him for never spending time with her and the kids and doesn’t think he respects her role as a stay-at-home mom.”

“Oh. Well, he should do better. Not good. I can understand her position,” she said, fluffing up a pillow behind her back to make sure she was sitting upright. He refilled both their glasses while she spoke. “Don’t you agree?” she asked when he didn’t answer.

He frowned. “About Carl?”

She rolled her eyes. “Uh, yeah? You should have said something to him.”

He shook his head. “Uh, no. And I’m not qualified to give marital advice to a stranger. Considering Carl’s T-shirt was stained and it looked like he hadn’t showered in a week, his wife might be better off with him not going home.”

He had a point. “See, you already know half of what’s wrong with Carl’s marriage. Do you have cards?”

He raised his eyebrows. “Cards?”

She nodded, crossing her legs. “I’m good. A shark.”

His mouth curled up slightly, and he leaned on his side so that he was facing her. “You are probably the worst liar I’ve ever met.”

She inhaled sharply. “What? I’ve mastered my poker face.”

He gave her a full-on Cade grin, and it should really come with some kind of warning. “Your face goes red.”

She shook her head. “No.”

He pointed at her forehead and cheeks. “Yep. Blotchy, too.”

She clenched her teeth. So while she was thinking about how his smile was deadly good, he was thinking about her blotchy face. This was her life now. “You’re just saying this because you don’t want to play poker with me.”

He rolled his eyes and flopped back on the bed, tucking one arm behind his head. Dear God, he was like some kind of model, just lying there casually beside her. Don’t look anywhere but his face. Unfortunately, his face was all kinds of perfect, too. There was nowhere safe to look. “You gotta work on that poker face,” he said gruffly, staring at the ceiling.

Oh no, what did that mean? He knows. She had ogled. Never in her twenty-six years had she ogled. She needed Carl to hurry up and get here so she could stop being so awkward. “Is there more whiskey?”

“Maybe we should just go to sleep. It’s late enough, and tomorrow if we leave early, at least the entire day won’t be wasted.”

“Oh.” If it had been freezing temperatures in here, she bet she would have been able to see the cold form an O around the word as it whispered out of her mouth. How was she going to save face? It was a Friday night and she had dragged this man—this man of all men, a man who could probably choose to spend his Friday night with almost any woman—to a motel in the middle of nowhere, with nothing but liquor and candy and the offer of a card game. How had this become her life? At least her old life was pathetic only to herself. With this new life, Cade was witnessing it.

“But what about Carl?”

“Ten bucks says his wife isn’t giving him dinner.”

“Can you pass the bottle of whiskey?”

He refilled her glass.

“Thank you. Listen, I’m sorry I dragged you into this anyway. It sounded like it was going to be an adventure, and now you’re stuck here wasting your Friday night with me.”

She downed her glass and watched as he stared at the ceiling.

“It’s not a waste.” His voice came out clipped and not at all like the warm, sexy voice she’d heard all night. Fine. Well, there was no point in sitting here crying over this cowboy. She had a giant pile of food that she normally never allowed herself to eat, and the whiskey was making it very easy to speak her mind and indulge her cravings. He didn’t say anything, so she helped herself and grabbed the bag of Peach Rings. Maybe he’d fall asleep right then and there.

“Are you going to stop crinkling that bag soon?”

She made sure she crinkled it extra-loud and extra-long for being so rude. The bag finally opened, and she tossed one of the sugar-coated rings into her mouth. Then she remembered the last person she’d shared these with, and a wave of loneliness swept over her, even though she wasn’t alone.

“All done crinkling,” she choked out, cringing slightly at the way her voice sounded. It was either choke on her own tears or choke on the Peach Ring. Josh would always end up eating way faster than she would, and then she’d get mad at him for eating most of the bag.

The memory and the ache left her sitting there with her hand in the bag and her mind in the past. At least she didn’t have to worry about actually crying in front of him. When she finally raised her eyes, it was to witness the hottest man she’d ever known punching his pillow before settling back down on it, his back to her. Was it sad that she really wanted him to say something? Anything so that she wouldn’t feel so alone? She shoved another Peach Ring in her mouth and stared out the window into the parking lot.

“Are you also going to keep making that smacking sound with your mouth?”

That was it. Hot or not, he was being a jerk. “These are chewy candies,” she said, her words garbled because of the amount of candy in her mouth. She threw a Peach Ring at his head.

He flipped over, looking at her. “Did you just throw candy at my head?”

She rolled her lips inward and started to slowly shake her head and then turn it into a nod. He let out an exasperated sigh.

“I think it’s rude of you to just check out on our plans just because Carl is having marital issues. If I had hired you as an escort, I would have fired you by now. Also, I get that your Friday nights are probably filled with lots of…lurid things and this is really tame and boring for you, but you should at least try and be polite.”

His eyes were wide, and for a second she didn’t know what he was going to do. But he burst out laughing. A really deep, throaty laugh that almost made her smile. Except she didn’t because she was mad at him and he was laughing at her. “Lurid?”

She shoved a few more Peach Rings in her mouth and washed them down with whiskey. The whiskey really did make everything better. “That’s it? I tell you all that, and all you can do is point out my vocabulary choice?”

“I haven’t heard that word since I watched a black-and-white movie when the cable went out.”

“You’re funny, Cade. You know what I mean,” she said, hating that she’d used the dated word. This is what happens when your only friends are over seventy-five, Sarah.

“Why don’t you tell me what you think I do on Friday nights?”

“Uh, this isn’t a game show. I’m not going to sit here guessing what you do for one hundred points.” She grabbed a Peach Ring and carefully placed it on the tip of one finger, then continued to do the same until each finger had a Peach Ring on the tip, just like she’d done when she was a kid.

He stared at her and then laughed again. She had never seen him laugh so much. He grabbed her hand, and she stopped breathing as he dipped his head, pulled a Peach Ring off one of her fingers, and ate it. Dear God. Nothing in her life had prepared her for Cade’s mouth on her finger, and even though it happened so fast, she was pretty sure she’d never be the same. She was also pretty sure her face was as red as a tomato. “That was mine,” she managed to say, waiting for him to laugh.

“I’m not wasting my Friday night,” he said in a voice she hadn’t heard from him before; it was deep and gravelly and stirred something unknown within her.

She peeled her eyes off his face and stared at the contents of the bag. She was reassured that even if she choked on the Peach Ring in her mouth, the opening would prevent her from suffocating to death. “Thank you for saying that.”

He shrugged and sat up. “Are you sharing?”

She nodded, holding the bag in his direction, torn between relief and disappointment that the moment was over.

“I’ve never had these.”

“Really? They used to be my favorite as a kid. I haven’t had them in years.”

He refilled their glasses. “So. Why don’t you tell me why you didn’t want to go home tonight?”

“Because that’s the only place I ever go,” she said with a shrug.

“Why?”

She put down the bag of candy and traded it for the whiskey. “My parents were extremely overprotective people, and I wasn’t really allowed a social life unless it was one they orchestrated.”

“Like how?”

“I’ve been out with three different guys, each one worse than the other. But all three were from families they thought were suitable.”

He grabbed a handful of Peach Rings. “So they set you up on dates? What was the criteria for these dates?”

She held up her hand. “Money, ranching family, upstanding citizens.”

He looked away for a moment, his jaw clenching. “And what was wrong with the guys?”

She shrugged, knowing exactly what was wrong, everything that was missing in this scenario. Not that she’d tell him that, but the buzz that was rippling through her that had nothing to do with the liquor she was drinking was exactly what had been missing. “Well, they were kind of boring. Remember, I’m the girl who had no life, so if I think someone’s boring, they’re definitely boring.”

One corner of his mouth tilted up, his eyes sparkling with something. “For someone who hasn’t had a lot of freedom, you’re not boring at all, sweetheart.”

Her mouth dropped open slightly, and her stomach swirled at the endearment and how softly he said it, how deep and rich his voice sounded. She frantically thought of something to say to him, knowing that she was one of many who’d probably been on the receiving end of that endearment but not wanting to dwell on that. For now, this was her night with him, and he made her feel more alive than she ever had as an adult. “That’s sweet.”

“I’m not being sweet; I’m just telling you the truth. This is…fun.”

Her heart started beating frantically in her chest. “So what was the last fun night you had?” she blurted out, wanting to know more about what he actually enjoyed doing.

He ran a hand through his hair. “I, uh, I’m not sure.”

“Liar.”

“Hey, I may be lots of things, but I’m not a liar. Fine, let me think. I didn’t know I’d have to come up with an actual example. Oh, I’ve got one. Tyler and Lainey’s wedding.”

Her mouth dropped open again.

He frowned. “What?”

“That’s also really sweet.”

He shut his eyes and lay his head back on the pillow. “Clearly you’re getting the wrong impression of me.”

She picked up the square decorative pillow at the foot of the bed, intending to smack him with it, but without even opening his eyes, he’d anticipated her movement and grasped her wrist. “That had better not be one of those decorative pillows that are filled with germs.”

She laughed, but her voice came out breathy because the feel of his hand wrapped around her wrist was making it hard for her to breathe normally. “I cannot get over how much of a germaphobe you are. No wonder you carry hand sanitizer. Not many cowboys I’ve met do.”

He let go of her wrist, and she put the pillow back down, flustered and giddy at the same time. “If you knew what I knew about motels, you’d feel the exact same way. Can I ask you something?”

She nodded, trying to hide her embarrassment and disappointment that he was distancing himself. “Sure.”

“We’ve worked together for a few weeks now, and you’ve kept up with all of us, have worked hard and haven’t backed down from anything. I was worried about you on the cattle drive, and I didn’t need to be—you were amazing. Why wouldn’t your family let you get involved with the ranch? It couldn’t really just be that you’re a woman?”

A pang of remorse stabbed her in the heart. She hated talking about this. It was one thing for it to be there in the back of her mind, but it was another to have to talk about it aloud. But he was the first friend she’d had in years. The first person who listened to her without shooting her down or mocking her. He brought her here, just because she asked him to. Cade was so much more than the most attractive man she’d ever known.

Suddenly, all those years of holding everything in, of keeping it all together, seemed so wrong, seemed so heavy, and she wanted nothing more than to rid herself of all of it. She wanted to share it with someone.

She stared at him, the pile of junk food between them on the bed, and knew that once she opened up to him, she was going to let herself fall for him. Even though she sensed he wasn’t a man who was going to give her happily-ever-after, maybe all she needed was right now.