TRACY QUAN

On & Off the Job

In halcyon days

your thumb

pressing against

my spine

I had

this tendency

to reserve

my pleasure

On the job

If

my body

had

a

Nixonian

plan

I threw in

a Mona Lisa

smile

What’s with

these activists

telling me?

“No children

at this table”

I

was

there.

Three years later

Deprived

of something

I hadn’t

always

wanted

When you held

my hand

without

touching

I discovered

that

needing it

is better

than anything

It wasn’t

because

I was ready

to start

working

again.

The grandiose

buried in

my soul

playing

no role

in this

My body

was ready

for us—

My theory.

But you

protected

my heart

and

sent me

back

to

work

Unmarked

Novitiate

Don’t call me a lite hook. Fluffer. Sugar baby

New to the game but born a business lady.

My destiny? One bare speck. Distant shore …

If I fuck this up, you’ll be back. For more.