Chapter Seven

Robert had attended the ballet nearly a dozen times. To his surprise, he had enjoyed it.

He understood the story now that Katerina had explained it to him, but more than that, he loved seeing her dance. Yet each time he met her on her balcony, he was reminded that they were another day closer to the end. Tomorrow night would be the last show in Toronto, and Robert wanted nothing more than to find a way to buy more time for them together.

He tugged at his tie as he prepared to attend Katerina’s performance again. He had already bought two more dress shirts so he would have fresh clothes each night while his others were being laundered by the local dry cleaner.

Slipping on his shoes, he sat on the edge of the bed to tie the laces. The phone rang, and he stretched across the mattress to snatch it from the cradle, the cord stretching as he lifted the phone to his ear. “Hello?”

“How are things going?” Miles asked.

“Not bad, but can I call you back? I’m about to walk out the door.”

“To the ballet again?”

“Yes.” Robert shifted on the bed so he could hold the phone with his shoulder and finish tying his shoe.

“You must really like this girl if you’re using all of those tickets Linda sent you.”

“Yeah. I’m not looking forward to day after tomorrow when the ballet leaves town.”

“Actually, that’s why I’m calling,” Miles began. “How would you like to spend some time working at the theater here while Swan Lake is showing in Montreal?”

“What are you talking about?”

“Linda is friends with the manager of the theater. It so happens that he fired one of his employees yesterday and is looking for a replacement. The job is yours if you want it.”

“Wait. You’re saying I’d be able to keep seeing . . .” Robert trailed off, Katerina’s paranoia about phones being bugged causing him to alter his words. “I could keep seeing the ballet?”

“That’s right. Are you interested?”

“Yeah. How soon would I need to be there? The ballet is here through tomorrow night.”

“Not a problem. You wouldn’t need to start until the morning the dancers arrive.”

“This is great. Tell Linda thank you.”

“I will,” Miles said. “Give us a call when you have some time, and Linda can give you the details.”

“I’ll call tomorrow afternoon. Thanks again.”

After hanging up the phone, Robert slipped on his suit jacket and headed for the door. He couldn’t wait to see Katerina. And he couldn’t wait to tell her the news.

Katerina took her seat on the bus, leaning her head back and closing her eyes. Even though her understudy performed her part for the matinee showing each Saturday, the physical strain of performing was taking its toll on her.

An elbow brushed hers when someone sat beside her. “Are you okay?” Vitya asked.

“Yes, of course. Why do you ask?”

“You were not as sharp tonight.” He lowered his voice and added, “I suggest that you put aside whatever is keeping you up at night and get some sleep. I wasn’t the only one to notice.”

Katerina pasted on a neutral expression, but she couldn’t keep the color from draining from her face. “I don’t know what you mean.”

Vitya patted her knee. “Rest, Katerina. And get a good night’s sleep.”

Katerina shifted in her seat and closed her eyes once more. Did Vitya know about Robert? Did anyone else? Or was her fatigue showing more than she realized? She had been so good about only spending thirty minutes with Robert each night, but she couldn’t deny that she often got up earlier than she might otherwise had she not known she could spend more time with him over breakfast.

The thought surfaced that after tomorrow night, she would no longer have the daily distractions. The familiar dread roiled uncomfortably in her stomach, along with a sense of panic. The heartache of being separated from Gavril would pale in comparison to what losing Robert would do to her.

The bus pulled to a stop, and Vitya stood and motioned for Katerina to exit first. She slid out of her seat, and Vitya leaned close to whisper in her ear. “Don’t forget what I said. They’re always watching.”

A sickness spread through her, but Katerina forced herself to move forward as though she hadn’t heard his words.

Her mind raced with questions and what-ifs. Had someone seen her with Robert in the hotel when she’d left her room? She hadn’t seen anyone in the hall outside his room or in the stairwell. Perhaps she had been heard talking to Robert on the balcony. They had been so careful to keep their voices low, and she was certain they had remained out of sight. Yet, if Vitya’s words were any indication, someone was aware of her secret romance.

Could she risk seeing Robert the next two nights, or was it time to face reality? This couldn’t continue.

Pain ripped through her, and she struggled to appear calm.

Taking her time, she walked with the rest of the troupe, deliberately staying in the middle of the pack. Anxiety mounted with each step, the thought of saying goodbye to Robert clawing at her.

Tonight, tomorrow night. It was going to happen. By the time she reached her room, her decision had been made. Her heart cracked open, now exposed and vulnerable.

She walked inside and took a few minutes to brush her hair before turning out her bedroom light. As expected, Robert was waiting for her on the balcony.

Katerina was nearly to the door when a new thought surfaced. What if she and Robert hadn’t been seen at all? What if her room had been bugged? Or worse yet, her balcony? Had the KGB been listening to their conversations this whole time?

She hesitated at the door, contemplating the possibilities. Finally, she slid the door open. Before Robert could greet her, she held a finger to her lips.

His eyebrows drew together, his confusion heightening when she pointed to his balcony. Robert seemed to understand the need for silence, and he climbed over the railing before lifting her over to his side.

Again Katerina pointed, this time to his room.

Robert led her inside, and Katerina closed the door behind them.

“What’s going on?” Robert whispered.

“I’m not sure.” Katerina glanced over her shoulder at the glass door and stepped to the side of the room to ensure she couldn’t be seen. “I think someone might have been listening to us.”

“What? Who?”

“I don’t know.” Emotions welled up inside her, clogging her throat. For a moment, she couldn’t speak, but she finally forced out the truth. “Vitya said people are watching.”

“He said they know about us?”

“Not exactly.” Katerina shook her head, trying to push aside her foolish dreams of what could never be. “It doesn’t matter. This has to be goodbye. I need to go back to my room. I need to find a way to turn our time together into a warm memory instead of my greatest regret.” She turned for the door.

“Katerina, wait.” Robert reached out and grabbed her arm. Shifting in front of her, he opened his mouth to continue.

“Please don’t make this any harder than it already is,” she said.

“You would walk away from us? From whatever this is between us?”

“Don’t you understand?” Her voice rose, and she fought to bring it back to a whisper. “I don’t have a choice.”

“There’s always a choice.”

Before she could evade, Robert’s hands lifted to her shoulders to hold her in place, and his mouth crushed against hers.

A dangerous thrill whipped through her, regret tangling with a snake of fear. This wasn’t one of the dreamy kisses she had come to expect from him. Instead, she could taste his hunger as well as his desperation.

Then, as though a switch flipped, he gentled the kiss, his hands caressing her arms, lifting to tangle in her hair.

He pulled back, his eyes boring into hers. “Katerina, please don’t give up on us.”

Another piece of her heart broke away when she pulled free. Tears sprang to her eyes, and she swallowed hard. “I’ll never forget you.”

Before she could reconsider, she opened the door and rushed outside. Robert’s footsteps didn’t follow, but she could hear the gentle click when his door slid closed.

It was over. A tear trickled down her cheek. She would never see him again.

She dropped onto her bed, and her hand lifted to her mouth to fight the sob that rose within her. Every moment with him had been a gift. He made her believe anything was possible, that the illusion of controlling her future could be real. Silent tears spilled over, and she rushed to the bathroom. Afraid someone might be listening, she turned on the shower. Immediately, a sob broke from her, merging with the sound of the running water.

She sat on the edge of the tub, stared at the bathroom door, and recognized her life for what it was. Ballet had brought her to the Western world, but she would never truly know life outside of her gilded cage.