The Gentlemans Guide To Effortless Seduction
This book is dedicated to all the beautiful, feminine, passionate and playful women I have had the pleasure to learn from, explore with, and celebrate.
Lovers & Companions.
For continuing to challenge, exposing parts of me I never knew existed, and helping me grow into a more complete man.
I Thank You...
Chris Bale - (Irish) Founder and Head Coach at MasculineIntent .com
Acupuncturist
:
Lic.Acu. DipTCM. DipAcu. TuiNa
Internal Masculine Development Coach
Meditation/QiGong Trainer
These biographies usually begin with the individual speaking about how bad he was wit
h
women
before he learned the world's most amazing technique, which he now teaches. This is not one of those biographies.
Like you, I was always a natural wit
h
women...
I just didn't know it!!
I spent the first 25 years of my life getting in my own way with a horribly weak belief system and portrayal of myself, which had absolutely no basis in reality. I got the girl very rarely because of this. I was incredibly insecure and self-conscious throughout my teens and into my early 20s.
To combat the feeling of self-loathing, embarrassment and shame, I drank alcohol, and took drugs, attempting to squash the feelings of unworthiness that bubbled inside.
Where these feelings came from I will never know, as I had a very loving upbringing in a secure family dynamic
.
I was a bit too protected.
I rebelled as a teenager and got mixed up in many things that served me no purpose. Academically I was poor, but only because I had no interest in a teacher telling me what was apparently right or wrong.
I have always been an incredibly sensitiv
e
perso
n
and overly aware at all times.
This added to my emotional issues and I found it hard to even speak with people comfortably as I matured. I saw my ability to connect and be hyper aware of my surroundings as a negative thing...an overwhelming thing. Now, I see it as the greatest tool I can ever posses! It has allowed me to connect with and attract women in situations of great complexity, where another man would fail
.
At my core, I am a chilled introverted guy, but with an animalistic sexual desire, combined with a lighthearted playfulness. I call it mischief. I live in the land of sexual innuendos.
In my teens, I ran from my power, and forced myself to be the upbeat life of the party in order to make "friends", lying to myself.
I went through my romantic endeavours, confused and lost, hoping that we both get drunk enough to sleep together, wake up, and forget it ever happened. I lived every weekend like this, internally lonely and isolated.
I was changing who I was on a daily basis, all depending on the specific individuals I came into contact with. I was about 50 people in one, and I lost my true self, which took me quite a while to re-discover.
I now own who I am. I am relaxed, laid back, and if possible, I don't even like to speak that much. I don't need to, I am so aware I can pick up anything I need to by simply being around that person. We all can, it’s just your focus that needs shifting.
My life changed after I enrolled into Traditional Chinese Medicine in College, and spent he following 4 years having my reality shifted, and my world turned upside down.
I am now a fully qualified, acupuncturist and masseuse. It has allowed me to see my sensitivity in a new positive light
Through meditation, Qigong and my TCM studies, I have a very deep and specific understanding of how the masculine and feminine energy interact, and how one must go in order to become sexually polarizing.
I now move through life with an unwavering self assurance. By this, I don't mean I don't get scared...I do, all the time, but now I have a clear understanding of exactly who I am as a man, and my role in life, which ultimately makes it much easier to deal with if it should choose to arise. We are human after-all!
I now live by a very simple motto...Wei Wu Wei; achieving results without externally doing anything. Instead, using my internal states to seduce for me, at ease.
Do I fail you ask? Yes, everyday, and I now see it to be an incredibly necessary thing which ensures I am continuously growing. I really believe that failure is the greatest teacher of all. The more I fail, the better, as it shows I am stepping outside of my comfort zone consistently. I fail more than any guy I know...but I also win more than any guy I know!
I have spent the past 5-10 years unlearning everything I have been told is 'the way'. I have re-discovered my core, my masculinity, my raw seductive sexuality which is inside of every singl
e
man
.
I
look
forward to guiding you towards yours!
“Knowing others is intelligence; knowing yourself is true wisdom. Mastering others is strength; mastering yourself is true power. If you realize that you have enough, you are truly rich.”
Love Love Love
The Completed Man
Mind-Frame for Seduction
No Pressure
Your Ego
Power Of Rejection
Voice in your Head
Understanding Confidence
Masculine Sexiness
Body Language
Sexual Tension
Approaching Women
Breaking Free
As Nature Intended
Power Of Presence
Identifying Attraction
The Comfort Concept
A Seduction - Expect Nothing, Give everything
A Seduction: Identifying What She Wants
Female Emotion
Generating Animalistic Sexual Magnetism
A Seduction - Magic
Settling For Less
The Directionless Approacher
Important:
I would like to state I am not a “life guru” of any sort, nor am I telling anyone how to live their lives. This is simply a grounding in the energetic core of attraction between the sexes, and what I believe it is to be A Man in the purest form. I would like to make it absolutely CERTAIN that what I speak of is not to be associated with the concept of manipulation to attract. What I speak is coming from the most genuine, loving, and honest part of man, which can truly only be tapped into through relentless self reflection and inner work.
I am going to begin with the single most important factor to mans success with the feminine. The question 'Do you love women?'.
In my previous coaching with guys, it has been one of the areas overlooked until recently, when in some cases, I felt there was something lacking when trying to describe, express and deliver my message and principles to men.
It strangely enough is not only the most important question to ask yourself, but is also the question never asked in the 'dating' community. Its so obvious that it is completely taken for granted, and simply assumed.
I was coaching this specific client not too long ago, we shall call him Darren.
Now, Darren had been undergoing Skype sessions with me for about 3 weeks, 1 weekly. I invest HEAVILY into my online coaching in terms of getting the best for the men who put their trust in me, in every case going over the allotted 1 hour limited to 1 and a half or even 2 hours. This is with every guy regardless. So, that being said, I pride myself on getting guys phenomenal transformations in a very short period of time.
So, with Darren, it was the first time I had hit a brick wall.
By the third week, he had all my principles understood and implemented. He had processed everything, and he had become it, which is the norm. I was pleased, and so was Darren.
After doing the exercises I assigned, he did not experience the results of my other clients and I was completely puzzled. He would speak of situations and interactions, and even though clinically he was applying the correct principles, there was no 'umph', so sexual attraction, and everything would fizzle out.
Then, during our 4th session it hit me, seemingly out of thin air, but I went ahead and asked the most simple, obvious, yet PROFOUND question; "Darren, do you LOVE women?"
There was silence. A hesitation.
He responded with "eh, ya, sure, why else would I be doing all this?"
When a man who truly loves women is asked that question, there is no hesitation, there is only passion and instant gushing of that passion.
You see, Darren, like everyone else in the dating community, takes it as a certainty. But, do the majority of these guys BEHAVE in a way that states 'I LOVE WOMEN'.
No. No they do not!
For me, this simple question was the missing piece in passing on my full success with women to my clients. Do you love women? What does the way you are behaving state? Is it congruent?
I tell everyone, I fall in love approximately 20 times every day. Im talking about a deep passionate, and overwhelmed love, where i feel it to my core. In the pitt of my stomach it flutters. In my heart it explodes, and in my brain it short circuits. It is physical, energetic, and spiritual. It's my instinct.
I am madly in-love with women. I adore everything from the way they walk, to the feel of their soft skin, how they slot their fingers between mine to hold my hand, her thick bountiful hair, the way she smells when I kiss her on the cheek, her cheek, the little arch in her lower back when im kissing her soft spot on the inside of her thigh, how she looks to the side shyly when I look at her wanting to devour, the playfulness when she gets excited, the vibrancy behind her eyes. Her beautiful exuberance.
Young, old, slim, heavy. I lOVE WOMEN!
They add passion to my life. They bring innocence to me. They remind me what if feels like to be a child again. I am endlessly curious and in a state of wonderment around them.
If I was given a choice of sitting in a room with a group of guy friends, vs a group of female friends, Im sorry dudes, but the feminine wins every single fucking time! Regardless of looks.
I celebrate women on a daily basis, and I do it unapologetically. I love women, and women love me.
If you give your love, they can ONLY love you back.
She is my drug, and I my brothers, am a self accepted, and self proclaimed addict. I cannot beat this, I wouldnt want to beat this, because for me, without feminine energy to blossom within my life and my spirit, life is not worth living.
Every woman is the most BEAUTIFUL thing this world can offer me, and through my deep understanding of what the feminine needs from my masculine, I can celebrate with her intimately.
Do you LOVE women? When you see that stunner walking down the street, do you fall in love? Do you feel like you have just been shot in the chest with a double barrell shot gun? Does life slow down in a split second and everything else cease to exist?
If the answer is no to the above, its ok, because as a man, it is in there, you must just allow it to come to the surface and allow yourself to express it.
Ok, back to Darren...
After discussing this with him it became clear, he was not allowing himself to celebrate women, instead he was implementing my principles, but coming from the wrong space.
When he saw a woman he desired, he would ask himself, 'ok, what must I do in order for her to like me'. This is not showing love. The contrast to that, is how I feel when I see a woman I desire, 'I want to share her beauty with HER'. I see her 100 times more beautiful than she sees herself, and I share this with her.
Darren is going over to take, I am going over to give.
Darren is going over to use her beauty against her, as a technique, by saying the right things to get her to give him some of the beauty, the scraps. Whereas I am going over simply to state her beauty and to celebrate it with her.
Darren needs something in return for going over. I, do not expect anything, although in my experience sex and connection is the most common byproduct.
Most men only approach women, and only give compliments, and only learn 'pick up' techniques because they want something in return. Like a barterring system.
I never expect anything. There is no trade off. Simply being in her femine presence is all I need and desire, and I will be happy with whatever degree it goes to. Im there to CELEBRATE her. I have unapologeticaly approached many women and told them I had fallen madly in love with them within the first few seconds. Many guys would ask isnt that just 'needy' behaviour, and my response is always the same; "when your celebrating something, whatever you say is coming from an unnatached passion" which is the opposite to being needy.
Think of the last time you ate a beautiful meal, and you took the first bite and as chewing the delicatble tasty mouthful you blurted "OH MY GOD that is absolutely amazing", CELEBRATING the deliciousness of what you are experiencing. No one has ever said "dude, you are being needy with your food and coming on too strong, give it a rest".
Now, how would you say that to a woman? No doubt you would change exactly where its coming from, making it spew from a needy place looking to do it all 'right' in order for her to give you what she now apparantly owes you. Women do not owe you shit! Especially if you are trying to take all the time.
When you can interact with a woman like you did with that amazing first bite of food...you my friend, will have a life surrounded by beautiful, loving, intelligent and sexy women of every walk of life. They will want to be around the man who unapologetically accepts his desires and roles as a man, and gives them undying love.
If I feel low, or im having a bad day, or feel groggy, or sad, doing something as simple as interacting with the girl on the checkout desk in my local shop is enough to pull me right out of it. The feminine energy fills me and makes me feel amazing. It is intoxicating, and changes my mood and day for the better. That is AMAZING, which is why I feel the need to be so appreciative.
You dont need anti-depressants, love women and their appreciation will pull you right out of your stuck state.
So, to finish off with Darren, after giving him a specific exercise to cultivate this level of love for women very quickly, his results skyrocketed when applying the principles which you will read in this book. After his 4th Skype session, he was done, and is currently seeing 3 regular girlfriends, along with having an endless stream of sexy girls celebrating with him.
This book is dedicated to women. As a man reading this, you are going to ultimately have a profound impact on spreading love and happiness to all the women you choose to deliver your presence to.
You cannot fear that which you love.
I want to make it clear, that the principles i teach you to apply in this book, and seductions which are demonstarted throughout are all stemming from my love of women, and not from a 'im too cool for you' or a 'im better than you' headspace.
The principles must not be seen as a manipulation or tactics, because this will stunt your growth. Instead, i apply the principles i apply because of understanding what the feminine craves from the masculine. Its out of love i have took the time to learn and hone my level of interaction, so i can give women what they truly desire. Allowing me to light up their life, as they do mine.
Now, with all that said...
In today’s society, we are old models, in a new world, forcefully adapting, according to societies imprints on our minds and bodies.
As men and women, we are slowly being guided away from our resonating roles in life. I am speaking about the element of attraction, from masculine to feminine, and to do this, it helps to understand the root of both energies.
Male and female energy are very different in reality. They are opposites, perfectly complimenting each other, when at their purest forms.
Masculine energy, at its core, is that of nothingness, emptiness, the observer of life and emotion, always present, always feeling, always letting go. The masculine energy is strong, grounded, and with a clearly defining purpose that carries him through life with an unwavering self assurance, and awareness.
The female energy is that of motion, emotion, love, and compassion, which at the purest form is devastatingly seductive to the masculine. The masculine has an unattached void within. The female energy compliments, and fills the masculine with love and guidance towards ones purpose.
In today’s world, for whatever reasons, roles have begun to intertwine and shift from one to another. We see men confused, and not really understanding what it is to be a man. Instead we are paraded with social media on being a man. Masculine energy is being strangled.
Masculine energy is very much being forced to retreat and men are becoming more feminine in nature. Today’s “alpha male” type is the insecure, muscle bound, material craving, woman degrading little boys who are prevalent in society.
We are being forced to a point where we are told we “need” something to fulfil ourselves and become the idea of what we want to achieve in life.
The truth is that when you try to learn from the outside or display your “Alpha masculinity” it's transparent to the women you dream of.
That's why people continue to learn, that's why there has been no key to the PUA aspirations, there has been and never will be a technique that masters all others.
This belief and behaviour is hazardous to the male, but also heavily affects what women resonate with, and how both sexes bring out the best of one another. Which role do you fill? The “Alpha” or the opposing “Directionless nice guy”? Unfortunately, neither is good, and neither is pure. I do not have the time to delve into both and nitpick.
Enter the Renaissance man.
The Renaissance man is simply a term I use to describe the evolved male. The Renaissance man offers the woman the freedom to break out of the mundane and frivolous confines of reality. He approaches with gusto, and a knowing self assurance that simply states, "I am a man. You are a woman. I want you".
The Renaissance man embraces his masculine energy, and is 100 percent authentic in his intention. He does not hide his male desire, he does not fear it, he does not worry about offending the female, nor does he approach looking for a specific outcome.
He is unapologetically himself. The Renaissance man offers the woman freedom, the masculine energy at its sexual core.
Renaissance men are surrounded in this world by either PUA types or men aspiring to feed from the energy they create, men who are unable or unwilling to reach their core. Hiding from themselves and manipulating women; the “nice guys” of society.
(I have to be clear when using the term “nice guy”, I am referring to the insecure friend zone type of male, who believes by putting his purpose in life to one side, by giving the female everything he can, spoiling her with gifts, jumping to her every command and constant affection, that this will sure enough guarantee entry to her swim suit area)
This is one million percent WRONG! This is not coming from a place of love, respect and mutual recognition as a man and the respective female, but a place of self loathing, showing needy behaviour.
Instead there is no respect or attraction built from the female. If a man loses his purpose to give it all to a woman, attraction, and respect will be lost, as the man does not even have it for himself. A man’s relationship to his own emotions is a direct reflection to how he relates to female energy.
Emotion IS the female energy. Do not for one second think that you can hide who you really are from a woman. The female energy is beautifully present and intuition is at a much higher frequency in the female.
Your issues, insecurities, fears etc will be blatantly obvious to her. That a good enough reason to stop hiding! She will have you pinned from the first few seconds of coming into contact with your male presence.
It’s a sign of amazing strength in a man to be emotionally open and vulnerable with a woman. Yourself acceptance and honesty will spark attraction in itself. Hiding how you are feeling will be permeable and weak to a woman.
Attraction is not a choice
Remember, female energy is EMOTION. In order to generate attraction, the male energy needs to be playful with emotion. The man needs to generate every possible emotion in the female, all whilst she feels secure and safe, all the while, keeping her in a state of suspense.
Female energy is not necessarily attracted to the man, but is attracted to the emotional states of which the man provides and infuses while in her presence. If I could give one piece of advice in this case is, when with a woman, BE PRESENT!
Women are beautifully intuitional creatures. More so than the masculine can ever be. By not being present you strangle her raw ability to take you places you have never experienced. If you are not present with a woman, in the moment, spontaneity cannot flow, and the fun, attraction, and deep connection will not be made. STOP TRYING TO BE COOL – Cool does not exist. “You” exist, and “now” exist. Be YOU, NOW!
Be your internal self, externally.
Be unapologetically honest about who you are and what you want in all aspects of life.
Something that speaks volumes about the male energy is the ability to comfortably hold eye contact. 90 percent of men CANNOT deal with eye contact as it represents an inner openness and confidence that is not present. The more you grow inside, the more you will be able to connect with the female. Let the female energy engulf you!
The renaissance mans approach leaves the female energy refreshed and energetically dominated in a natural and polarising way, which is essential. The competitive other males watch, as he systematically goes against every rule in their” how to attract a female” booklet that they supposedly believe in.
They watch as the Renaissance man straps the woman into an emotional rollercoaster of fun and excitement. It perplexes them. This level of sensory awareness of self and emotion allows the Renaissance man to discover places in a woman that are emotionally inaccessible by other men.
Thus the entire surface level male see's is “attraction”; he does not understand what is unfolding before his eyes.
He is incapable of comprehending the level of self worth, inner value, comfort and acceptance this man has achieved.
Contrary to popular belief in this “sexist” world where females are running 90 percent of men, they DO NOT want this job. Women want to be women, and they want men to be men.
In my very provocative opinion, highly sexist women/women’s rights warriors are, at their core, angry and resentful that they cannot experience a man strong enough to lead them, dominate, and naturally take on the role.
I understand the mayhem this statement would/will cause in a lot of women’s groups, but I believe this to be very true at an energetically fundamental level.
Women in today’s society WILL test men on a daily, hourly, second by second bases, to see if you are a real man. This can involve “harsh criticisms”, and objective comments attempting to throw the man off balance and play with his ego. If the man fails, it IS downhill from that point.
Men, LEAD!!! In no way do I mean this in a misogynistic fashion, nor am I placing men above women, I am simply stating fact, that men and women both hold different roles in nature.
Know your role, and do not leave anyone else convince you otherwise.
The definition of insanity is doing the same thing again and again, and expecting different results! GET OUT OF YOUR COMFORT ZONE! NOW!
Give women the opportunity to experience an emotional roller coaster of shock to laughter to a little fear, to suspense, and all in a matter of seconds.
On the outside, society may perceive the Renaissance man as uninhibited, but when at the very core, he knows with every ounce of his being exactly what is needed, in any moment, to induce attraction in women.
We must make her feel unsafe, and secure all at once. She must be angry and aroused simultaneously, with our tonality, body language, and our deep lust. This is not done through words or “social interaction”, but on a completely subconscious level.
People can observe the Renaissance man engaging in a simple everyday conversation, but on a deeper level, only he and she can truly feel it. This is once again, where the Renaissance man differs from the “Common” males.
When sexual energy, or sexual connection is felt, the Common male, will get uneasy and disperse it by moving and jumping from the moment. This will not allow the female energy to engage. She will be disappointed, and the attraction will instantly dissolve. Sexual energy is the Renaissance mans playground.
He generates within himself, initiates it in her by creating states between him and women, holds it, and allows it to build in the moment, thereby giving the female full permission to be in the moment and explore it.
Most women in this day and age will start to get overwhelmed with it and attempt to disperse it with nervous, self conscious gestures etc. This is where he keeps her in the moment. Reassures and they both explore further.
The Renaissance man does one simple, yet PROFOUND thing that is unknown to the common man; He projects the female more beautifully than she can see herself. This comes from a deep love of the feminine energy. He embraces it. He loves it. He wants it. He goes and gets it.
We anchor the feeling of excitement and spontaneity. We give in to our urges aggressively, and the female clings to this passion that is inside all of them. At the opposite side, the devolved male projects his insecure, unsafe care. Women do not need care! They need to be expressed through the male energy, and with that comes the greatest safety of all, sexual immunity to threat.
You stop being concerned by the competition. You realise that you are at the forefront of the development of the human species by raising your social sexual awareness and allowing this to create your world.
You become detached from weakness and your sabotaging thoughts but you must never forget to listen.
LISTEN! LISTEN! LISTEN! LISTEN! – But do not take on board. She does not attract to us, but rather the moments we conceive through her, and place on her. Men live in logic, women live through emotion, and it is very foolish of a man to try to break it down to understand her. Do not quiz her, but leave her feel her emotions safely with you. Be there as an extra medium of expression for the female energy.
She wants a new frame of reality, only offered by the internally evolved and aware man. Be that man. Be you!
Focus
Men, what do you want? What do you want from women? Exactly? Do you know?
When you see a woman you are attracted to, what are you thinking? That they might not like you? That you cannot possibly walk up to her and let her know what you are thinking in a straightforward and honest manner? What are you afraid of? Rejection? Is your jumper dirty? Do you smell? Are you shy? Why?
All these questions and fears/worries all stem from ONE problem; inability to FOCUS.
You are not focused on the woman and what it is exactly that you want, but instead, on yourself. You are being selfish and very egotistical. You are attempting to think for the woman. That’s quite arrogant of you isn’t it?
When you see a woman you are instantly attracted to, ask yourself, what is it exactly about this woman that is attracting me?
Is it her beautifully long feminine legs?
Is it her breasts?
Her curves?
Her smile?
Lips?
The way she carries herself?
WHAT IS IT THAT ATTRACTS YOU?
When you figure that out, FEEL IT! Also, what do you want from her?
A relationship?
A friendship?
Just sex?
Once you know, FOCUS ONLY ON THIS. You don’t need to worry about being direct; you don’t need to worry about being indirect. Celebrate the effect she is having on you.
Breathe, relax, drop your tone, slip into the sexual masculinity that resides within you, , glance at her and stop your thoughts, your meditation is now.
This will be your meditative state.
The more you do this the more your mindset will begin to shift and you truly begin focusing on your dreams, not what you are afraid to want.
Women want to be desired.
Begin to focus on what YOU dream of. Be your own man. If they don’t like what you have to say, or they do not share the same desires as you then so be it.
When you are present with women, there is no such thing as rejection, just someone who does not happen to want what you want.
Do not mistake this for a numbers game.
Numbers are for objects.
Preface
What follows is a guiding process. Many avenues of understanding and examples will be coupled with VERY simple and straight forward practical steps to complete your puzzle. Rather than giving you 3 big pieces of the puzzle in one way, I am instead offering hundreds tiny pieces of in-depth expressions and understandings rooted in many examples of real-life application, saturating your old negative belief system and way of thinking, which will allow you to build and complete your own puzzle, the puzzle of YOU!
I am not here to turn you into me, but rather to give you as much education on how the masculine interacts with the feminine, in order for you to mould it to your unique and individual self, resulting in absolutely effortless seductions, connections and love with the women of your dreams.
THIS is where success lies.
Lets get started...
There is NO perfect mind-frame for seduction. This is the dirty little secret!
If you go out of your way to put yourself in a mind-frame for seduction, you immediately create anxiety, over thinking, and all the mental blocks, that together build a mind-frame of hesitation and worry.
Ironically, getting yourself all set for a day of "approaching women" creates the worst possibly state for seduction. You should never have to force yourself into the role of being a man. You are already there, in every case.
All guys anxieties and worries come directly from a made-up pressure you have deliberately created for yourself, before even leaving your house!
Smart, eh?
When I leave my house, it's never to approach or pick up women. Instead, it is to go about my life, whether that be going to the local shop to buy milk for breakfast, or travelling in town to meet a friend.
If I so happen to see a woman that catches my fancy on the way, then yes, I am going to say hi.
Women are not numbers. Have something more than days of sarging to offer them, and they will repay you greatly for being a passionate man.
Some helpful beliefs to begin to think about, and how you may be thinking the opposite:
- I am an amazing human being
- Women naturally find me attractive. I have a penis, they have a vagina. That's it!
- Women adore being approached by me. It makes her feel like a sexy and desired women. Therefore, every time I go and interact honestly with a woman, I am improving her self esteem and confidence. That is fucking beautiful!
- I am a man who takes consistent action in the direction I want to move in order to achieve my goals. This alone makes me an attractive and valuable man.
- I am already an impressive person, therefore there is nothing I must do in order to impress her, other than simply show up and start the interaction.
These are just a few that I can remember using and when I talk with my students, they tend to come up over and over again. Sit down with a pen and paper, and think about it. What are your negative beliefs about yourself that are stopping your success with women?
Write them down, and on the opposite side, write down the opposite of that negative belief...the positive version.
Read these new positive ones as often as you can.
Beliefs
The beauty about beliefs is that neither the positive OR the negative are true. They have no basis in reality, so you can choose the most powerful beliefs you want in order to move you in the direction of self improvement, growth and success.
I could choose to believe I am crap with women and none of them like me, OR I could choose to believe that I am an amazingly charismatic and a charming rogue of a man who women adore....neither are actually true, but what the positive belief will achieve, is me taking action, and walking over to the stunning blonde to say hi, whilst thinking in my head 'you my dear are a lucky devil iv just decided to come and speak to you'.
CHOOSE YOUR BELIEFS, because either way...you are the director of your own movie, whether you like it or not, you write the scripts, so stop killing yourself off. Think BIG!
Guys learning to get good with women, at the start, get so regimental. I see it so much. They pile an extraordinary amount of pressure on themselves trying to do everything perfect straight away.
This pressure is then built and built if they are not being guided correctly, or not experiencing success in their own terms, to the point it becomes an internal pressure cooker scenario. Inducing long
s
tates of fight or flight, which when it comes to approaching and seducing women is like pissing against the wind.
Throw the idea of perfection away. It doesn't exist. Enjoy making mistakes. It means you're learning. This leads to spontaneity and creativity. You let go of the reigns and enjoy the journey.
There is nothing in life worth gripping to, because whether we like it or not, we are all on the way out. We have no control. Give it up. Let it go, and act from abundant acceptance.
When you see that girl and you feel that pressure build "what do I say to her?", let it go, and instead say to yourself...
"I can make her feel amazing" and go say hi!
Don't take.
Give!
Don't ask.
Offer!
Many teachers and coaches in the area of dating and self growth speak about the concept of destroying your ego, in order to "not give a fuck", running after women blindly. Also, to make that pitch even better, your ego can apparently be destroyed in a 2 day weekend, says the shiny advertising.
Why on earth would we choose to go against, become enemies with, and even think of destroying something which is an innate part of us. Your ego houses your identity to a large degree.
If you run through life on autopilot, refusing to self reflect and look inward at times, then your ego will control you, and determine your decisions in life. Yes, this is bad in terms of living the life you truly desire. With some simple awareness of how it influences you, can you begin to interact with it positively, to your advantage, with LIFE CHANGING results!
Monks sit in temples for decades trying to destroy their ego, i.e. - reach a state of egolessness, most of the time incredibly unsuccessfully.
Unless you are willing to swallow 14 grams of Magic Mushrooms in one, or partake in an ayahuasca ceremony, which will only destroy your ego for a few hours, then please gentlemen, stop making war upon yourself and pissing against the wind.
Instead, choose to become friends with your ego. Consciously mould it in a way which benefits you and guides you towards what you desire in life.
Fine tune your ego, losing what doesn't serve you, and adding what creates success.
Many of the men that I see for personal training arrive to me very broken and financially broke from these companies and individuals who offer to destroy your ego, making unrealistic, unfair, and very selfish promises. In this case, the "teacher" is moving down the road of an ego-maniac = the doctor is sicker than the patient.
Choose to love yourself. Every single part.
You can only succeed!
This thing we call rejection, is probably the first and most fundamentally large mound of fear to break through when you are looking to begin immersing yourself in women. Most men classify rejection as a bad thing, but I wouldn't know, because I never get rejected...
"WHOAA, what did this douche bag just say?" I hear you ask.
First, we need to define rejection in its appropriate terms. To me, rejection can only occur once I have already walked over to a girl, got her attention, and begin seducing. NOT before. Saying hi to a girl, or telling her she is cute or sexy, with her storming off offended or weirded out(its common guys, enjoy it) is NOT rejection. You didn't even get a chance to begin. Count yourself lucky she left, because nobody wants to hang around talking to someone who doesn't want to be there.
In order to be rejected, you must have already began the natural process of seducing her, but really even at that stage, I never see it as personal, it's simply a human being who doesn't happen to want what I want in this particular moment in time, that's it!
I tell every guy I coach that the most empowering, positive, and educational part of my journey of becoming a great seducer was getting rejected. Why? Because before you take the plunge to walk over and introduce yourself, the thought of her making a weirded-out face is the most terrifying thing on the planet. BUT, when it actually happens, it is nothing, ever! This induces intense relief and a mountainous overflowing of positive energy and internal strength. You also feel like an absolute champion for taking the simple and obvious action, which most men are too afraid to do.
Are you comfortable living your life alone and sad, never achieving what you want, all because you're afraid of sitting in a 2 second window of awkward tension, with a person you probably will never see again and which will have ZERO negative impact on your life?
Approaching that pretty girl you see in line at the coffee shop, or the sexy brunette standing at the bar in a completely imperfect and natural way will result in 1 of 2 things.
She will look at you like your a creep and you will walk away feeling like a champion for facing your fears. (this awkward situation will last all of 2 seconds)
Or, she will love you, and you will have amazing sex with her, and you will both enrich each others lives
If you are allowing a possible 2 seconds of awkward tension to stop you from having an amazing girl in your life...you should double check you have a penis, or check your mental health records, because you may be crazy.
It's ok though, because I was there, we were all, and in some cases continue to be there. It's the knowing and acceptance that rejection really aint shit that will make you amazing with women.
With this belief system in toe, you will effortlessly go out and speak to every attractive woman you see, because really...what do you ever have to lose? I know, its fucking exciting right!!!!!
There is no perfect approach. I keep saying this. You must go out and fail in order to succeed, but again, the "failing" is so fucking miniscule compared to the succeeding.
Any guy who asks me for advice on women, I will first ask him how many women a week does he interact with. usually the answer is very close to zero. So I say "ok, your question is irrelevant because you have not even begun the task of which you are asking the question on. Here is your job: "Next week, as you are going about your daily life, speak to around 20 women, get blown out on purpose if you want(this relieves any pressure), and if you STILL have the same question, I can help you. Right now, I cannot"
The guys who do this, the question is usually answered very quickly, they go on to accelerate and have lots of sex. The guys who don't, read another eBook, slink away into their dark bedroom, and continue to over think.
It's sad, but its true! The amazing thing about this, is that it is completely your choice!
It's also
so common with guys I coach. They arrive, either stuck on an ex, or have all their focus on one girl which is causing them unhappiness and sexual frustration. Friend-zoned in many cases
.
After approaching a handful of women, facing their fears, seeing "rejection" as a good thing, and becoming aware just how easy it is to be the master of your sex life...the obsessions, the neediness, and the focus on that one girl disappears. But not by choice, simply because he is too pre-occupied having fun meeting new women!
If you are stuck on a girl...speak to more women...neediness isn't a human emotion! It's a deficiency which comes from hiding from your sexual instinct!
Speak to women. All of them!
I was sat on the beach earlier, when a German family sat incredibly close to me. I instantly fell in love with the daughter. She kept glancing over and locking eyes, the tension was evident, even from 5 feet away. I spent the next 10 minutes arguing with myself internally on why I shouldn't approach even though I wanted to speak to her. The excuses your mind makes up on the spot is incredible, su
c
h as:
- People will hear me and think I'm weird or creepy.
- She's with her family, its way to awkward, her dad will kill me.
- I'm wasting my time even speaking to her because she is way too hot anyway and probably has a boyfriend.
After hundreds more of these excuses, I eventually said fuck it, what's the absolute worst thing that could happen? "The dad will put me in a sleeper hold"... I came to the conclusion that I would be ok with that.
"hello, do you speak English?" I said...they did!
"I have spent the last 10 minutes too afraid to speak to you, but I had to come over to announce I have fallen in love with your daughter"....
A wonderfully kind and light-hearted reaction from the family. She was quite embarrassed, but loosened up pretty quickly. Unfortunately they leave to go back to Germany tomorrow, but the point is, I did it, even when every logical ounce of my brain was telling me otherwise. If I had left without taking action, I would have felt a sense of failure, self loathing, and anger towards myself. It's a nasty cycle. Instead, I broke it down, chose otherwise, and had a great conversation with a nice group of people for over an hour, exchanging details.
If this sounds familiar to your own process, become aware of your patterns, and realize that through awareness and bravery, you can choose to accept that you have the power to take action whenever you want!
I will, one day, meet Sophia again, and she will receive my lightsaber of love!
Confidence with women comes from trusting that you are NOT the power.
The power exists with or without your permission. It is natures power coming through, and all you must do is allow it.
The word confidence is thrown around by everyone within self help, but the meaning is different to just about everybody.
To me, confidence is not about feeling cool, calm and unfazed in every situation. If that is your definition of confidence, then I am not confident! In my opinion, confidence is feeling fear, and just doing it regardless, because deep down, we really know that taking the specific action WILL benefit our existence on this planet, and in turn, help others to take a lunge towards happiness.
We are not robots. We are human beings, and guess what...that girl you are talking to is probably far more insecure than you are. Realize this, and stop searching for perfection within you emotional range and results with women, such as the "perfect approach". You are searching for a false sense of perfection, which does not exist, and only stops you from excelling and growing through failure and experience. I am vulnerable in every approach I do! This is how you connect and achieve mind-blowing results.
We are all human, we just try to pretend we are not. When you blatantly allow yourself be human and vulnerable in front of someone else, you give them the permission to do the same. This, is profound!
There is NO right or wrong way when seducing a woman, just like there is no magic line, or sure-shot technique for getting the girl. Success in this area of your life comes directly from your understanding about how masculine interacts with feminine. This book is specifically aimed at giving you the understanding you need, in order to effortlessly attract and seduce women.
You cannot walk past a magazine stand without seeing sexy women splashed across glossy mags, with the 'top 10 ways to be sexy for your man' etc.
One area you don't see alluded to in the mainstream media is that of how men can be sexy, or what it means to be a sexy man. Why part of the absence of this is down to male ego and sensitivity, I think this is so, mainly because in order to define masculine sexiness, it would be going against many socially correct and gender equality issues.
Before I continue, I will ask you, who in your mind is the sexier man....and why...
Al Pacino vs. Chandler Bing
Marlon Brando vs. Michael Jackson
Harrison Ford vs. Taylor Lautner
Bruce Willis vs. That dude from Dawsons Creek
Now,
A few words that describe the actions, vibes, and qualities of a sexy man, and how the internal focus of sexiness is manifested into his external world in the form of body language and communication:
Presence.
Calmness.
Slow, purposeful movements.
Relaxed, slow, rumbling and calculated speech.
Somewhat intense and sexual eye contact. Clear.
Sensual, soft, sexually warm, stimulating touch.
Sexually stimulating conversation
Discreetness (increasing the sexual tension)
Direct and vulnerable honesty and authenticness in desire
The above is a list of the main qualities in a man, that drive women absolutely crazy, and turn them on in ways in which they rarely experience with the unaware guy.
When it comes to body language, it is an incredibly manipulated area of growth within mainstream media and personal coaching.
I really believe that all these body language studies on what is "attractive" body language to the opposite sex is all...well, bullshit. There is nothing fact based. Instead it's just a collection of humans making up their minds on what they assume, then putting it on paper, and saying this way is the right way, and this is the wrong way. Don't get too caught up in body language because there is an instant remedy to any of your questions.
When you allow your instinct and desire for the woman take over, it looks after your body language, including your rate of movement, eye contact and speech. It becomes sexualized, once you allow it to engulf you in the moment, and all in a completely congruent way.
Stop trying to "seem" confident, and start to feel internally sexy. Once you do this, everything is taken care of.
It can be scary to allow this, but the more you do it, the more powerful and inbuilt it becomes.
Realize that your reality is based completely on what is going on inside of your mind.
Shift your focus to the fact that you want to unapologetically devour her, and hey presto, body language shifts into your seductive state. You become and project an aura of sex. It's quite amazing to see it take instant effect on the women in your presence.
The ability to create sexual tension, and sit in it comfortably is the main difference between an effortlessly sexy man who gets quick results, and a bumbling over-active supplicator who goes out of his way at every point to make the woman feel ok, happy and comfortable at all times, never wanting to step on her toes.
This is the typical crutch of the nice guy, who feels he has to be super nice and overly accommodating to earn a woman's attraction. For some reason the majority of guys you see interacting with women will be doing one of the following things in order to absolutely KILL any chance of sexual tension, and releasing pressure continuously. i.e. - getting in his own way.
Nodding at everything she says like an over eager horse
Over the top smiling where unnecessary
Laughing at absolutely nothing
Breaking eye contact/not holding
Moving/fidgeting
Speaking quickly
Carrying the entire conversation because he does not allow her space to talk
The above, are the main areas that you can go out right now, and see happening straight away.
I bet while reading through that list, many of them will sound familiar to your individual interactions. Well, this is good, because now, you have awareness to it. With practice you can shed all of these overtly accommodating and weak traits.
You are not the woman's gay best friend, so stop pretending to be!
When you ask her a question is a slow relaxed and sexy manner, allow her to answer, fully. Do not jump in, do not offer a remedy, do not move onto your next factual question. Allow her to delve and to fill the silence. And how do you do that?...give her silence.
Also, when you are looking at her speak, look directly into her left eye, and feel her. Feel her wrapped around your penis. It's a certainty, enjoy it. She will feel this, and you will be very surprised by the interconnection of both energies. Be aware of how she begins to blush, break eye contact, and giggle for absolutely no reason.
When she finishes her sentence...allow a second or two space from her. This will do two awesome things.
Creates huge amounts of sexual tension
Makes HER work for you, not the other way around.
By not being as reactive to her amazing hotness as all the other over eager guys, this will instantly intrigue her. (I want to make it clear that the deep love you have for women will shine through regardless. The reactive man is only reacting due to an insecure neediness and confusion.)
"Why the hell is he not jumping through hoops to get me? ahhh, maybe this guy is different. Maybe this is the man who can give what I desire"
I have literally had gorgeous girls ask me "Hey, why are you not trying to get me? Do you even like me?" - then initiating the kiss because they could not handle any more tension I was placing on them. It's the sexual tension bubble, where your environment and surroundings disappear, and you are both sitting in this sexually charged and bubbling dome of sexual energy. It is powerful!
Be clear that this is NOT a technique...but rather an adaption of your behaviour to align yourself with your new understanding of sexual polarization. An understanding of how the masculine and feminine interact at their polar opposites.
Being socially correct will not get her into bed, being polarizing within your masculine core will...fast!
Approaching refers to an action that has not even occurred yet.
When you go out solely to approach women, you are planning to think - thinking about a situation that has not even happened. This drives the logical, analytical brain into over-drive, and immediately begins to create an internal battle within. Anxiety and worry is formed.
I will keep repeating...NEVER go out to approach women!
Go out to buy some milk, or go to the bank, or go for a walk, or whatever it is you do with yourself, and if you happen to see a woman that attracts you...go! There is never any pressure for you to speak with a woman, so please, do not put that pressure on yourself. It is unnecessary and detrimental to your happiness.
Your always a man, you are always on, attraction is always on, women are always on. You can speak with a beautiful woman whenever you desire to.
You have a penis...you are automatically attractive to her. Where men mess up, is by trying to do or say too much in order to impress a woman. This is what drags you away from your masculine core, and you kill the attraction yourself, on purpose, you are getting in your own way, cock-blocking natures job if you will.
How we have been told it works by "Pick-Up Coaches":
Spend many hours every week devoted to running after women on the street.
See the girl
You find her attractive
You get the feeling of you HAVE to act (pressure)
Think of the best line to say
Approach
Open
Act like you care about her by asking questions you do not care about
Impress her with amazing stories
Get number
Tell all your friends
Text her
Never hear from her again
The above is so far from the truth, and involves much more logical work. Its hideous, and is actually damaging your ability to truly connect with, and sexually stimulate a woman.
A king does not need to state the fact he is the king...because simply having, or feeling the need to do so means that he is not the king.
The king is the king. He knows, they know, and it is such a ridiculously stupid and time-wasting chore to state such obviousness.
YOU are an amazing man!
You are sexy, strong, stimulating, and intelligent.
YOU are the lead character in the movie which is your life.
YOU choose who you are, what you experience, how you live, and what you deserve in any instance. You do NOT have the need to explain this to a woman, or take on behaviour which attempts to do so.
The postman does not have to tell me he is the postman, because of course he is the postman, he is delivering my fucking letters. The postman has never once told me a story of that one time he delivered 500 packages in one day to ensure I get the fact he is a postman...Him feeling the need to show this to me would basically make me feel like he assumes I'm stupid or suffering from a retardation. Do you assume women you are attracted to are retarded? If so, close this book, and do not contact me. If you understand this point, then please read on, internal freedom awaits!
You do not have to convince a woman that you are an amazing guy with a penis who delivers orgasms, love, connection, security and excitement. She already KNOWS you do, you were born without a choice. You naturally have a penis.
All the above is fact, and you cannot do anything about it, other than unconsciously getting in your own way with un-true beliefs, and pushing women away from you.
But even at that, you cannot resist forever.
There will be one night in a bar when you get a little too drunk, and a vagina WILL find your penis.
Just give up. Give up getting in your own way. Give up doing, saying, and acting too much. Try being quiet around women, or to get the point across even stronger, trying making eye contact with a woman and shutting the fuck up, say a few words, listen, and let her speak, play, and become attracted.
Leave space for sexual tension to bubble, let nature take its course and allow that beautiful woman to feel sexually charged animalistic attraction for you, which results in continuously effortless seductions and sex.
Nature is effortless, as we see on a daily basis.
Trees grow, the rain falls, night becomes day, and women are sexually attracted to men, and demonstrate this through sexual intimacy.
STOP GETTING IN THE WAY!
You know this, deep down, you do, every man does. You explain and try to impress a woman, because you currently lack a tiny bit of understanding which I am just about to finish clearing up for you...
Women are the most sensitive, aware and intuitional species on this planet, so you do NOT have to point out how amazing you are, nor do you need to impress them. They see you, and they see how amazing you are...
YOU ARE AMAZING!!!
Having to state it...is a waste of time, especially when you could be turning her on. This is what she wants!
It's not about becoming perfect or indestructible. It's about choosing to succeed regardless of fear!
- Approaching/Interacting with women -
You should NOT have time to think of what to say. This is a form of hesitation, which is the logical, and anxiety fuelled devil when it comes to interacting with women. Thinking is exactly why you have not spoken to her yet!
"Openers" are a direct extension of that negative thought process. Openers only exist in the land of hesitation. Which again, is why you are not over there speaking to her!
After reading the above section on freedom, and I hope re-reading again and again until you feel that shift, here is guidance towards your masculine core when it comes to effortlessly interacting and seducing the feminine:(take note of how short it is)
See a beautiful girl you have attraction towards
Repeat a phrase mentally in order to pinpoint your focus. FEEL IT!
Walk over and say Hi, or whatever comes out naturally, be it a compliment of her beauty, or her effect on you!
Result = CONNECTION! SEX! LOVE!
*A quick side note on number 2:
examples of what phrases sometimes pop into my head when I shift to my masculine core:
"You are so beautiful"
"I'm going to eat you"
"I can make you feel special"
Although my main intent is always the same:
There is NOTHING I need to do
I know that all I have to do is show up, begin the interaction, say hello, and my job is pretty much done. From then on in, it is not me who is actually seducing her, so this takes all the pressure off. Instead, it is my vibe and my presence that I live in through the understanding of the principles of what the feminine responds to. She basically carries out the rest of the process, I'm simply giving her the space and comfort to do so.
Effortless.
Come up with something that works for you and what you desire. Practice by watching women and repeating this phrase mentally over and over until you feel it take over you.
THIS is the secret. THIS is animalistic projection. THIS is what seduces for you. Anxiety and over-thinking does not exist in this space. It is supremely powerful, and the amazing thing is, you can change what you telegraph to her second by second, depending on the situation.
Your internal thought pattern shifts the vibe, and the vibe shifts your body language and voice tone in a way that is intoxicatingly overwhelming and congruent to the woman.
Following the guiding and focusing process as described above dismantles and destroys any chance of hesitation.
Without hesitation, acting in that moment, whatever you say will be coming from a focused, relaxed and unassuming place. This, is presence within the moment.
If you ever feel stress or anxiety around women, it is only a sign that you are not present with her, and that you have hesitated in acting, such as touching her, or moving into kiss her.
The very fact that the idea of touching or kissing has entered your mind, is a direct influence of your instinct, which you need to be following and trusting 100 percent of the time. Trust your penis and act immediately when you hear that nudge or desire arrive. It will never let you down.
Many people who bring out books in this area fill it with excessive information regarding every different aspect and stage of attraction. This, is unnecessary, and actually serves to diminish what they are trying to teach; something natural.
I will not speak to you about when to kiss a girl, or what to say to a girl, or how to progress with a girl, because if and when you CHOOSE to let go of the fear and control which has no basis in reality, and truly internalize what I have spoken about above, Then you will never have a single question, for me, or anybody when it comes to interacting with women.
This is pretty much all there is, and all you need. I am completely against overloading guys brains with any more information than they need. What I am recommending is to forget EVERYTHING you have ever been told, and simply focus on devouring her while in her presence. Your penis and her vagina will meet!
Trust.
One of the huge differences between success with women, and little results with women, is the awareness in noticing when you are being given an invitation to approach, or understanding when a woman is giving you signs of general attraction before you are even interacting. It also saves a LOT of time!
The general population of men in the western world seem to be completely unaware of when a woman is interested sexually. Most of the time, the signs are very subtle and delicate, because women are socially incredibly intelligent and sensitive to cues. Knowing this, gives you a good insight into how she may like to be seduced. Delivering your attraction in a discreet and suave way is the highest form of expression, to a woman, that you are on her level of awareness, and that you understand how she works as a woman, therefore your need to throw yourself like an overly obvious bull in a china shop is unnecessary.
It is a magic moment within the interaction, when you are seducing with such effortless, and fine tuned grace, that she shows her appreciation. It can be a simple astounded giggle, while shaking her head, and quietly sliding the back of her fingers across yours while you are both in the midst of a social group. This is the essence of seduction.
If a girl makes eye contact with me for more than 2 seconds, I am walking over to speak with her, regardless. This was an open invitation, that only the aware and capable man can pick up on.
This awareness says many things about you as a sexually proficient and discreetly seductive man.
But men...Fear not!
Many women will try their absolute best to make it easy for us, by looking again, and again, and AGAIN!
Some women will even smile at you.
Unfortunately each woman has her own threshold of frustration. If you do not act, she will eventually label you as unequipped, get annoyed with the state of masculinity in the world, and look for a different, better option.
This area of understanding alone is one of the biggest factors to having a large amount of women in your life for sex, love, and connection. Once you are conscious of what to become aware of, abundance flows.
Do not forget, you do not have to rely on the woman to have attraction. Using the guidance and internal focusing from this book, you can easily stimulate attraction first with your presence, allowing you to then proceed as stated.
Within societies current paradigm of sexual interaction, masculinity is, well, struggling. This has resulted in both good, and bad in terms of self development.
The good side;
There are many honest, courageous and spiritually aware men sharing vital information with their fellow man, in order to re-align 21st century masculinity.
Reconnecting their brothers to the core of what it truly means to be a solid, present, authentic, and charismatically charming rogue of a man, with his purpose and nutsack intact.
Here the strive for focused, refined, suave, and dapper gentlemanly greatness is encouraged, with the path clearly marked out by men who have struggled through to reach and play in this effortlessly abundant area of being. Passed down if you will.
THIS is fucking awesome, and is where I see myself, and what we do here at Masculine Intent currently.
But, such is nature, there is a Yin to every Yang . Enter:
The bad side...
Here, men who have through no fault of their own followed others down a road of disassociation with their masculine selves. Living from a space of unworthiness, self loathing and neediness. These unfulfilled internal expressions are strangled and perpetuated even more by the 'material' which this school of men have chosen to commit themselves to and teach one another. I know, because I was a part of this school not so long ago.
These are the individuals who define women as numbers, interactions as 'sets', being sexually social as 'sarging', and a whole load of other terms used simply to detach from the process of true connection with a woman, and thus from themselves as natural instinctual sexual beings.
In essence, making it far more complicated for them to achieve what all of us are striving for.( Il let you think of what I may be referring to, soon to come in another article.)
All these techniques guys feel they NEED to learn in order to trick a woman into bed is only fuelling their internal image of themselves that states 'I am not enough, I am not worthy'.
If you have browsed around many of the PUA websites, you will of course know that there are many different areas or 'modules' in order to seduce a woman according to the 'I am not worthy' way of practice.(aka the PUA)
Incredibly large books, audio packages and video courses have been created solely on each individual area of the seductive process, everything from approach openers about homosexual cats, escalation, to entire books on 'text game', right up to how to win back your Ex...why the fuck? You guys broke up clearly for a reason, anyway, I digress.
Right now I am going to deal with one topic that is HUGELY discussed and written about in an incredibly unbeneficial way by many 'gurus' out there, that is the concept of comfort.
Building Comfort
Anyone who knows me personally can attest to the fact that I am a generally very laid back, introverted and indifferent kind of man, which is clearly evident in my way of interacting with women and life. I put this down to spiritual evolution and internal understanding through long periods of meditation, which continues.
BUT!!! When I see a new marketing campaign from a dating company advertising products on building comfort , I celebrate the ridiculousness of such a silly and unaware message, by giving myself full permission to lose my shit in a celebratory kind of fashion. I facepalm myself heavily until bruises begin to form.
I can only speak from my own personal experience of being really shit with women; aka confused with who I was, to going through the personal growth and getting consistently successful with women. My own experience is all I can ever speak from, and in my experience, the concept of 'building comfort' is completely contradicting the essence of true comfort.
Yin & Yang
As men and women, our species interact as complete opposites in our purest forms of energetic states. That is to say, when a man is purely in his masculine, and the women purely in her feminine.
This is polarization, and is the foundation of sexual attraction, tension, emotional connection and spiritual recognition between the sexes which manifest as love, sexual desire, and that deep ache in our loins that tells you 'its on' .
With that in mind, the ' + 'of a man inherently effects the ' - 'of a woman. Emotional states of being are sub-communicated immediately upon interaction, and sometimes before each other even walks into a room.
Back to Basics
Let's look at the concept of building comfort again. This, is really the long way around. Building it is unnecessary, and as I related to before, it is completely obsolete and contradictory.
Comfort, is comfort. It's an emotional state which effects you mentally and physically and is then projected out into the world.
If you approach a woman and you are in a state of analytical nervousness, you are currently building nervousness within the interaction. She will feel this nervous awkward guy projecting this feelings of weirdness on her, which she will not like, as she begins to then feel your weirdness herself, in most cases wanting to get the fuck away from the interaction, i.e. 'rejecting' you. It never really matters what you are actually saying, it's all vibe.
In my opinion, this is one of the biggest issues guys have with getting consistent results approaching women. Would you blame her? How would you like it if some girl approached you acting all shifty and odd, yes, most likely, not fucking comfortable and looking for release from that feeling of discomfort, in flight mode. You would have this innate feeling that 'something is up here, something isn't quite right, I'm not sure what it is, but i don't like how its making me feel and i must get away from it'
Shifting Focus
Guys are made to focus so much on fixing their 'approach anxiety' which isn't even a real fucking thing. I'm afraid you have all been duped into thinking you have this problem.
This 'problem' you have, gets all of your focus as you prepare to begin an interaction with this girl(along with all the shit you have been told you must remember to say or do) in an incredibly uptight and anxious way; creeping her the fuck out, and feeling like she is trying to be convinced to buy something.
Now, let's look at this differently.
Evolved Comfort
You wake up in the morning and you do your usual 20 minutes of mindfulness meditation before leaving your house. You walk out the door chilled out and emotionally indifferent, sitting in a space of content wellbeing.
You see an attractive girl, so you decide to walk over and share your calm and grounded charisma with her. There is no line or opener in your head, just your appreciation for her.
With the internal knowing that you actually have nothing you must do or say to impress her, and with your trust that you have a penis, she has a vagina, and that people having be having sex for thousands and thousands of years, you give it up, let go, and slowly make your way up to her, lock eyes, and say 'hello....how are you....the way you walk....stunning.' Delivered in a calm, grounded and chilled out way. (please do not make note of that 'opener')
You are not there to take her pussy. You are not there to convince her of anything. Instead you have decided to share your gift with this very lucky woman, expecting nothing, present, in the moment.
How do you feel? Comfortable of course, with all the above beliefs how could you not? and it is expressed through every morsel of you.
How does she feel? COMFORTABLE, because really, as long as she chooses to be in your presence, she has no choice.
Gentlemen of the world, please take note....
YOU DO NOT BUILD COMFORT...YOU BRING COMFORT WITH YOU.
YOU DO NOT BUILD COMFORT...YOU BRING COMFORT WITH YOU.
YOU DO NOT BUILD COMFORT...YOU BRING COMFORT WITH YOU.
YOU DO NOT BUILD COMFORT...YOU BRING COMFORT WITH YOU.
Having to build something states quite matter of factly that it's not there in the first place. Why you ask? Do not look to the woman for the answers ever, you are the question, answer and the solution every time! Look first to your internal thoughts, actions and reactions.
The Importance
No woman is going to go to bed with a man she does not feel comfortable around.
When you have the ability to memorize women with your own oozing self comfort for the socially odd aspects of you interacting with her, you will allow her to follow you into sexual scenarios that the un-evolved man would never in a million years achieve. It gives her permission to follow you. It lets her know that you can handle what is, and what's about to happen.
This is one of the biggest differences between waiting 5 dates before sex, and approaching the same girl in the supermarket, and 20 minutes later having her bent over, pleading to be spanked harder in her apartment which was just around the corner.
Your reality is dictated by what you feel you deserve. When you are unattached and indifferent to the present moment, a deep comfort is expressed, a letting go, a giving it up to the ebb and flow of human sexual desire. Allowing your instinct and intuition to take the drivers seat and trusting it.
Giving the woman trust in you, and a willingness to receive all which you desire to offer her.
So, start, by learning to be internally comfortable whichever way the wind blows. Learn to be indifferent.
Meditate.
It will change how you relate with every aspect of your life!
I left my friends place, with an overwhelming headache, and generally feeling terrible. "I must be coming down with something" I thought.
As I stood outside on the busy pedestrian street, I needed to catch my balance a bit, I was feeling very lightheaded.
As I took a phone call, I glanced to the right, where I saw an absolutely adorable girl, standing there, looking incredibly bored. I judged this immediately by the unimpressed look on her face, how she was standing, her arms folded. Maybe she was leaning towards being a tad bit angry, or frustrated.
I hung up the call, took a breath to become somewhat aware of my currently wobbly energetic core, allowed myself to imagine her naked, on top of me, slowly riding me up and down, in a controlled a sexy manner. This was all I needed. I had clicked into my seductive state. My voice tone lowered, my chest engulfed with a strong purposeful inhale, I rolled my pelvis slightly forward, pumping my focus and awareness into my penis...I could feel her. Her warmth, her texture...I moved.
I slowly walked over.
First, I locked eyes with her...where my desire was instantly telegraphed through my entire presence, through my entire desire, which I had allowed take over. My instinct was in the driver's seat. She's mine. Every last piece of her!
"It could be worse" I said, in a slow, growling tone.
She instantly shifted states. She felt me, and responded as though someone had just shook her awake, taking her out of her head, away from her autopilot.
She immediately re-aligned her posture and way of being, to that of a more upbeat social girl.
She laughed "what could be worse?"
Ignoring her question...
"I'm Chris..." extending my hand with a slight smirk.
"Maria" she responded, whilst placing her silk like hand into mine. I didn't let go. Not once.
I held eye contact with her whilst in my head thinking "you know what's going to happen don't you Maria"...the tension and silence built for a few seconds. She blushed, averted my gaze, and both of us started gently laughing.
I adore this point in an interaction. This is mutual understanding. I know what's happening, she knows what's happening, and in this case, through the expression of laughter, we were consciously letting each other know of the understanding.
"Do you always have this effect on girls?" she said in a testing way, trying to throw my state, but deep down hoping that I am strong enough for her.
"That was cute" I responded, in a completely authentic way. I did find it cute. Every last morsel of how she said it made me want to squeeze her...so I did.
I pulled her in by the hand I was already holding and began to embrace her in the middle of the street.
"Tell me something" I ushered.
She spoke about herself for a bit, telling me her "story", as people tend to. We continued to hug, in broad daylight, in a busy street, for the duration of her story.
When she finished I pulled back, but keeping her draped around me.
"Your sexy aren't you?"
She giggled...
I moved in to kiss her...she turned her head, it landing on her cheek.
She started to become overwhelmed with giggles, sexual energy bubbling, unaware of how to deal with it.
"relax..." I said
"wow, this is nuts, iv just met you, I literally know nothing about......" I cut her off...With my lips.
We kissed for the next few minutes. Like 2 people who have already shared a sexual experience. First intense...then slowing down, lightly pecking, holding eye contact and smiling at one another with foreheads touching. In that moment...I was in love!
"NOW I know you" I said playfully slapping her bum.
She laughed out loud and shook her head. "I don't even know what to say, this is crazy, I came out to get away from my bitch roommate, and this happens"
"You should come outside more often" I replied with a smirk.
I explained I was leaving to get food and go home to relax for the rest of the day because I felt like shit.
I handed her my phone.
No words. Just action, in every case. She took it, without response she entered her number as I kissed her on her left shoulder, throwing in a gentle bite in for good measure.
She handed me back the phone and asked me what I am doing later.
"I'm staying in tonight, call up"... She tilted her head and relied with "hmmm maybe, but probably not".
"Cool"... I responded. I kissed her once more, held eye contact for a few seconds, turned, and left.
She messaged me on my phone about 30 minutes later, where the usual normal text like conversation began.
I don't like to text too much before I have been intimate with her for many reasons, but one of the most important one, is because I am not there with her, she cannot feel my presence, meaning she is free to tie whatever associations she wants to my words.
When it comes to me having sex with a girl, who I am, and what I stand for as a man shines through. I never attempt to "try" and get a woman to call for sex. I'm never ever "trying" to have sex with anyone. Trying is doing with the intention of failing.
I assume that I am going to have sex with the woman 100 percent, it's a certainty in every single instance. It's going to happen at some stage regardless, so there is no need to force anything, or race. It's the only natural outcome which can occur from me being a polarizing masculine person.
The secret here, is that the above is simply a belief which I CHOOSE to have. It's a belief that serves me, my purpose, and guides me in the direction of my successful self. You can consciously choose any beliefs you want, so why pick the negative version, which only serves to limit your life experience.
With this belief, there is no desperateness or neediness towards sex ever. I know I can have sex whenever I want it. Sex is no longer a privilege that has been bestowed down to me by the every magnificent holder of the vagina.
I am the cause of sex. I stimulate sex. I am the result of sex. I am sex!
With this way of moving through my seductive endeavours, women, in many cases can get quite annoyed about this. It has become a very normal reaction for me. It confuses them and frustrates them, BUT, it makes the want to experience sex with you on a whole other level.
They ask themselves "why is this guy not trying to get me, why is he not trying to convince me to have sex with him? WHY is he not chasing me"
I do not try. Ever. I simply be, act in the moment, and authentically express myself through descriptive statements, or physical action.
I become what I feel, that's your only job.
I already know I am amazing with women. I choose to believe this. But right now, that particular girl iv just begun interacting with doesn't...but, they are aware of 'something' that is making me different to other men out there. Something strong. Not even mentally, but rather physically, for example: "He is talking to me about a Chimpanzee riding on a segway, but my vagina is getting really wet, what's happening"?
Through the power of your desire and instinct, you undercut her logical brain, and stimulate her innate animalistic desires. We are animals at our core. We just have a huge brain, which is why we aren't all humping in the streets.
Ok, enough about public humping, I have side-tracked, lets return.
After some texting, and the reassurance that she doesn't have to do anything she doesn't want to, she knocked on my door at 9:30pm.
I shouted for her to let herself in, she did.
I was already lying on my bed watching a movie, she was simply joining in on that...for now.
She sat down on the bed beside me, in quite a rigid way. I knew she was uncomfortable, because she had suddenly made me feel it. Be aware!
To remedy this, I took action.
I got up and retrieved one of my t-shirts out of the wardrobe and threw it to her. She was in uncomfortable bedtime attire, so I took charge and fixed this for her, because I'm a good man, always looking to add and increase her comfort.
I lay back down, took her by the shoulders, moved her, re-aligning her pillows and laid her head on my chest.
"Chill out, relax, enjoy this"... I said.
Men, take the LEAD! Lead in every case. She wanted to be lying on me and cuddling, but she didn't know how to go about doing it within this new sudden dynamic. She is out of her comfort zone.
If you invite a woman into your world, you must guide her. Most women are not used to, or familiar with this level of masculine presence, so many will tip-toe.
Shortly after getting comfortable, we began to kiss. I stroked her, first softly, then firmly. We began to get more physical...when she stopped it!
She then began to tell me about her relationship issues of previous, and what had just happened.
Her state shifted quickly and she began to get flustered, anxious, and kept saying "I'm sorry, I'm sorry".
This, is quite common.
A moment of logical intervention from her ever helpful brain.
I immediately positioned myself back from her, but kept my arm on her.
"sweetheart, why are you saying sorry, you didn't do anything wrong. Weather we do anything tonight is completely irrelevant. You don't have to do anything you don't want to, I have told you this. There is no pressure, chill out and lets sleep" (or something along those lines)
She then began to get into a mental dialogue with herself attempting to justify her decisions based on the situations.
Where most men completely fuck up here, is by "trying". As they want the sex so bad, they begin to join in on the conversation she is having with herself, trying to sway her in the direction of his penis.
This is foolish, and in most cases a complete waste of time, to the point you may never sleep with this woman again. You will have destroyed the dynamic. Trying to take is not attractive.
Do not attempt to entertain or fix her internal battles. They are hers, not yours. Be respectful of her emotional process. They also have no basis in reality, so it's quite pointless.
What I do...is the same as I always do, and have done throughout the interaction from the beginning. I allow her to talk. I give her zero logical guidance. I don't want to have sex with logic...I want to have sex with instinct. Her instinct is still on...let's just give the logic a while to tier itself out...Again...we are animals.
I sat back watching the movie. Still, erect.
In my head...it's always on. I know once I'm aroused, she has no choice but to feel that energy from me. After more "I'm sorry", I guide her head back down on my chest...
I am aware of her breathing shifting. I could feel her horniness and desire begin to build very quickly. It was fucking intense. My heartbeat sped up. Her breath was getting heavier on my chest. She was trying so hard to control it. So what did I do...I listened to her body, and took unapologetic action within the moment. No thinking. Just action.
I slowly cupped her hand, and moved it, placing it on my hard dick.
She began to stimulate it...
I began to stimulate her...
We had sex. Obviously. Naturally.
It was amazing.
She shared with me during, and after, that she has never orgasmed like that in her entire life. This statement from her makes me feel a lot of emotions, but mainly, that of frustration and anger towards 21st century masculinity!
Everyone woman should be able to experience these feeling from men. Every man should be focused on growing as a sexual being.
If you offer, and give a woman greatness, you will receive greatness in return.
She experienced new, stronger sensations. More overwhelming climaxes. She was incredibly grateful and her mood was light and giggly.
She was gorgeously feminine.
I love how I got to give her a new wonderful experience, and her, me.
If I was needy and tried to force it, it would never have happened. She would of left feeling frustrated, upset, and probably a little embarrassed, not wanting to see me again.
Instead I took action. I was respectful of her boundaries, but I took consistent action, allowing HER make her own decisions on what she wants, or doesn't want.
Men, in most cases make up the woman's boundaries in their heads before even testing them. These beliefs such as "she doesn't want me to touch her there", is actually very disrespectful to women everywhere. You are robbing them of a deserved sexual, intimate, loving experience. Let's not be so arrogant.
Test her boundaries. Let HER set them. Then respect them.
Realize you are getting in your own way, with your negative beliefs. You are a man. You are already amazing with women, naturally.
Be aware of how little I needed to speak in our initial meeting. I literally said close to nothing. There was zero logic, just simple words, in order to draw herself out, allowing her to express herself in a secure and sexy way.
Seduction is effortless.
Go out, and give women an amazing experience, without just taking.
THIS, is one of the biggest secrets to being amazing with women!
"It’s a numbers game!"
"The more you approach, the more you get rejected, so just deal with it and keep on fighting the good fight!"
"Accept that 70 percent of girls simply won’t be interested in you."
"I don’t care because at least I’m being direct and saying exactly what I want, so this makes me an alpha male guy."
The chances are will have heard at least 2 or 3 of the above statements, and you may very well believe them, so much so, that they have become an integrated part of who you currently are.
Let me first state that this way of thinking is coming from a deep fear, a very stubborn fear and this fear is learned, coached, installed.
Enter you; enter your new world like a blind man irresponsibly swinging a bat of strangled masculinity.
I know this, because I experienced it.
How do you move through life? Or at least picture how you would like to?
Do you want to be the bull in the china shop, aka, the boy who blindly runs after women, without presence and awareness, throwing his unedited thoughts at the opposite sex in an aggressively stupid way, expecting to reap the sexual gratification of 30 percent of the women he meets? Afraid!
Or...
Do you want to be the suave, charming MAN, who uses his masculinity, sexual intelligence, and sensitive awareness to draw women to him? Without having to chase? Without playing a numbers game?
I have experienced both, I know which guy I have chosen to be, and that is the latter.
Being the bull in the china shop is so appealing at the beginning because it feels like an internal rebellion. A giant fuck you to the rules, to society. In many cases there is even an underlying sense of aggression and sadness to it, at least there was in my case, and in many other guys I have seen go this path.
You are encouraged to speak your mind like a real man, and in a sense, be stupid! Socially stupid. Encouraged that it never matters what she wants; only what I want, because I am the man.
It is a very easy way to be, blissfully ignorant, not willing to face your own fears. It is much easier for a man to blurt out exactly what he is thinking to avoid any confusion. The process reminds me of how a drunken baby would behave, and there is nothing sexy about a drunken baby...unless your chosen sexual partner is Gary Glitter.
I "behaved" in this way for many months, accepting stupidity as my saviour.
The statements at the top of this article all became very true to me. I did get rejected FAR more than I got lucky. That was exactly it...luck! If you play that game...you are dependent on raw luck!
Now that I move through life with intelligence and a deep overwhelming sexuality that I can play with, I don’t get rejected to an extreme sense. I honestly cannot remember the last time I have had a woman reject me. This does not come from any type of manipulation or dishonesty, it comes from the opposite, supported by a foundation of understanding of what side of my masculinity she wants and craves.
Because I now know myself to a profound level, I know all the different facets of what I can offer the feminine at any point.
Does she crave my sensitivity? My leadership and dominance? Does she want to be aggressively swept off her feet in mere seconds? Or does she want to be seduced in a gentle art form of sexual tension which is drawn out?
Identifying what she wants successfully = no rejection!
You need to see yourself like a sexual chameleon of finesse and refined smoothness, adapting when needed to your surroundings, this is real strength. The simple art of understanding her will drive her wild; it is one of the sexiest qualities you can display to a woman, as it is SO rare in a man.
Be intelligent!!
The seduction...
In she floated, perched almost on her tip toes, as she gracefully walked in. Tall and slender, porcelain skin, big almond eyes, with a tiny waist and one of the most beautiful asses I have ever seen, which was supported magically by her tight flowery yoga pants.
She carried herself with such confidence. This was not a fake "fuck the world" type confidence, but a loving self assurance, combined with strength. I could immediately tell this girl knew exactly who she was and what she wanted.
After a while of studying her expressions and movements in an incredibly desiring way, I walked over and introduced myself. I did not "approach"...because she is not a dangerous animal which I need to proceed with caution. She is a beautiful woman, so I naturally walked over to establish connection with her, and hope to god that she inspired more desire in me....
She did…
I feel my tonality drop; I begin to shift into my intuition.
She was very confident when I locked eyes with her and extended my hand. We exchanged glances and names; she was also comfortable enough to hold my hand as I spoke with her. She did not swoon.
She did not get weak at the knees.
She did not blush
She did not get overwhelmed by my presence.
She was quite business like...even with her warm smile.
Chris was confused!? What’s happening? Why has she not immediately declared her love for me?
Old "direct guy" Chris would of immediately thought "nope, she’s not interested, it’s a numbers game move on"...But that was old Chris...
This was around the time when I was developing a heightened sensitivity to the micro-reactions women display. It had been born through a large number of sexual interactions in the previous months.
I could have just said fuck it, it’s too much work and gave up before I even started, but instead, my beliefs were much different. I truly believed that she was only disinterested in me, because I have not yet taught her how to be interested in me.
I immediately gauged that being very verbally forward and/or sexually aggressive with this girl would be like pissing against the wind. It’s far too easy, and she is far too evolved to even entertain it.
She is so aware and sexually confident, that she wants a partner who can handle her sufficiently and demonstrate similar qualities of strength...
I was right!
On the first interaction with her...I could have classified that as a rejection. But I didn’t. Instead I was intelligent, and indentified what she wanted. She wants to be emotionally and sexually stimulated by a man who is well versed in the fine art of seduction.
The days following our first contact, I watched my realization become a very clear reality. A conveyor belt of sexually forward and verbally direct men approached her on a constant basis, only to be chewed up and spat out. Many of these guys were incredibly good looking and well dressed men. The only problem...they were the bull in the china shop.
For the first 4 days of being around her I didn’t even speak to her, instead, I'd simply make eye contact, strong, sexual eye contact. Feeling my desire for her overflow and engulf her.
In some instances I would walk up to her slowly, with presence, and just look at her beautiful almond eyes. She would gaze back...breaking the gaze when it got too much. FINALLY! I had begun to attain a level of sexual dominance over her. THIS is what she wanted. A man strong enough to handle her. She felt it. She felt my confidence in how I could make her orgasm in more ways than 7!
After about a week of intense glances, and telegraphing, the time had come.
conversation.
Nothing sexual was said. Ever. It didn’t need to be said. Casual conversation was conducted, mainly on her part. I didn’t smile very much. I didn’t feel the need to. I was a hungry Lion, deeply breathing in order to keep the blood flow pumping in my erect penis.
A few days after conversation had started, cuddling began! In between her time spent chewing overly eager and unaware guys up and spitting them back out.
She came to me, everyday, straight away, sitting in between my legs, wrapping herself around me. I would gently bite and kiss her neck, sensually. She told me this makes her horny. I affectionately pulled her hair and ran my fingers up her thighs, in an incredibly animalistic way. Every way I interact with her is the same as a lion would communicate with his chosen partner. Biting, squeezing, pulling, all done in a powerfully secure, but gentle way, all the while displaying I could devour you whenever I wanted.
She was exposed and she loved it.
We have become energetically very close. I know her and she knows me. We both respect the process.
She appreciates the fact I know and understand at any given moment what she wants. She does not get this freedom and presence from any other man. I’m the guy!
I’m was never desperate to fuck her.
This, in itself, says more than anything about the type of man I am. I can induce insane levels of sexual desire in her and myself, but I am controlled enough to resist.
If this was any other girl, she would have gotten bored a long time ago. This is the difference in identifying what a particular woman wants.
Identifying leads to success.
Being stupid...does not.
Every man is intelligent if he chooses to be.
What do you choose?
"That girl is a bitch, all she does is moan and complain."
The above quote is something I hear from my fellow man on a daily and nightly basis, either directed towards a girlfriend, a woman they are "trying" to fuck, or a girl they have not yet even spoken to.
Sometimes, it the harshest realities that serve for the greatest lessons in life.
If you are one of these men, and you even give a seconds thought to how a woman is a supposed "bitch", or a "complainer" etc, then this article is most definitely for you.
First, accept, there is no such thing as a bitchy woman, instead, just a man who cannot offer her what she needs and craves from you...presence!
Common Situation
You get home late from work, and arrive back to an empty house. You have had an incredibly busy day, and all you want to do is sit in-front of the TV with a beer and relax. Great. This is your first problem, which I will get to in a later article, but the main point I'd like to make is look at getting a job which you don't need to escape from, or which does not give you the need to leave your presence at the door in order for a TV program to keep you functional, it is not good food for the masculine!
Right, where was I? Oh yes, vegging!
So there you sit after your long day at work, unwinding, when in walks your girlfriend/wife, like a mountainous, volcanic storm of thoughts and emotions being spat out in an alarmingly frantic rate. If you were to observe her state, she would be over active, stressed, maybe emotionally anxious with all the thoughts and emotions that course so naturally through a feminine creatures veins on a secondly basis. But you do not. You do not make yourself aware of her state.
This parade of "complaining" immediately uproots you and throws you off balance, you feel a bed of anger bubbling up from your stomach, to your chest, and too your head, where you finally explode in a second of offering your presence, and shout "STOP MOANING AT ME", or in an even worse case, you don't even verbalize it, you simply ignore her until she goes away.
Enter a ridiculously unnecessary argument, which unfortunately, you have ultimately created through lack of understanding.
I know how frustrating this level of interaction can be, because I have been there myself over and over again. It's a cycle.
Women will take your presence however they can get it. If you are not aware enough to give it to her naturally, she will go out of her way to induce whatever morsel of presence she can from you. If this means throwing a glass through your new flat screen TV in order to ENRAGE YOU to the point of argument, then so be it. She has still gotten your presence, even if it is angry, you are still focused on her with strong intent. Understand this cry!
Right now, I will promise you, that with some simple understanding of the feminine i.e. your woman, this problem will not occur again, ever, as long as you do not want it to.
Know Your Role
When you think of yourself as a man, what role do you assign yourself within the relationship? In many cases, the two parties involved are on such autopilot that each others emotional states and way of interacting is not even dealt with or made conscious. This, needs to change. Well, actually, 2 things need to change.
1: Become aware of your individual reaction patterns direct towards her, and stop the reaction through presence, or simple breathe focus.
2: Become aware of her emotional expressive patterns and her constant desire for you to give her your presence, through her energetic outbursts.
You must begin to become aware of your role, and then follow through within that dynamic. I would like you to begin to see yourself as the rock in the relationship, or when around women in general. As the masculine this is your role. This signifies an un-moving, rock solid entity who is ever present for her to lean against when her emotional world takes its toll. See yourself as a safe haven for you beautiful woman to hibernate to. Somewhere she feels desired, secure, and most importantly, a place she feels heard...NOT listened to!
You do not need to listen to a woman for the most part, because what they say can be hugely irrelevant. I would actually highly recommend not listening to a woman in the most case. Women don't even listen to each other. They do something much more profound:
They feel each other.
Feel your woman.
The words which women speak, are in most cases irrelevant, and this goes within the process of seduction, along with long term-relationships. She doesn't even have a certain grasp what she is saying logically. Instead she is choosing the best words she can find in that particular moment, in order to mirror her emotionally abundant feelings which change within her like the wind. This can result in her saying some horribly hurtful things in a moment of passion, which will only really affect the unaware man. Be aware that yes, she may indeed hate you and want you to jump off a building in THIS moment...but 10 seconds from now, she may be head over heels back in love with you and crave your touch.
A quick side note:
Obviously be aware of when or if these negatively disrespectful criticisms become constant. There are times when you simply will not or should not tolerate such behaviour from another human being, and choose to move on. You will know if what she is saying is coming from a place of willingness to hurt, or just misdirected passion.
YOU ALREADY HAVE IT
Have you ever been in a situation where you know there is something not quite right with your girlfriend? You ask "are you ok? what's wrong?"...her response "NOTHING, IM FINE" said in a way which signifies the direct opposite of what she just verbally expressed. Lets try and feel that statement...
YES, clearly, she is within an emotional state. This is evident by her entire vibe. Her facial expressions, her tone of voice. They are simply not congruent with the statement "NOTHING, IM FINE"
If you have ever picked up this situation, or been in it, then I would like to congratulate you, as a man, you have the awareness tools to identify on an energetic level what she, or what any woman for that matter is feeling. Only due to your lack of understanding, you may not have known what to do with this natural instinctual superpower you have. Well done, you too, now posses my most valuable quality when it comes to seduction. We are of the same.
DO NOT LISTEN TO HER!
FEEL HER!
If I had 1 euro for every time I slept with a woman shortly after she has said something verbal to indicate she was not interested in me sexually, I would be an incredibly rich man.
Sure, she is expressing at that moment in time, for whatever reason she is not sexually interested...so, my job, as the masculine, is to identify this need, and in turn create a sexually stimulating environment through my presence/vibe, speech, and touch...which re-aligns her EMOTIONS, and sets them on a different path. Not her path, not even my path, but our path...which results in her then wanting to explore sexually with me...aka nasty nasty jungle book style sex!
Or, I could of just assumed she was a bitch, and slept alone that night!
Control v Guidance
Understand that women's emotions are exactly like the wind, or the water flowing with current. You cannot possibly ask a woman how she plans on feeling today, or even within that moment. Her well of expansive emotion runs far too deep for haven her to comprehend it logically, all she can do is let it express through her.
It would be like asking the wind "hello wind, what way do you intend on blowing today, and how strong?"... The winds response "I don't know, However I fucking feel like"...and like a woman, even asking the wind such a ridiculously uneducated question will most likely result in an argument!
Asking a woman "how are you feeling", angers her so much, because you are basically stating your lack of sensitivity to her emotions. She wants you to know her. To feel her. Without having to ask.
Understand that women's emotions cannot be governed by control. They are internally chaotic. Where there is emotional peace, a storm is brewing inside, ALWAYS! The difference between how you will react to that chaos, your reaction, is grounded in your understanding, or lack of.
The unaware man, sees her emotional fluctuation as a negative horrible thing which he must try avoid and hide from, peeking through her glass case of emotion, to see when the coast is clear.
The aware man, sees her emotional fluctuation as one of the most beautiful things about his woman. He envisions his woman's femininity and strength through her emotions. Her feels her vibrancy through her expression. But MOST importantly, he sees her emotional chaos as doorway to her love. A doorway to connect in immeasurable ways.
As I said, you cannot control her...
But, as an aware man that she craves...you can guide her out of her emotional states in a split second, into states of happiness, love, and sexual arousal, effortlessly. The art of seduction.
Lets return to the first situational example from the top of this article and see how the aware and present man handles this situation.
Awareness in Action
So there you sit after your long day at work, unwinding, when in walks your girlfriend/wife, like a mountainous, volcanic storm of thoughts and emotions being spat out in an alarmingly frantic rate. If you were to observe her state, she would be over active, stressed, maybe emotionally anxious with all the thoughts and emotions that course so naturally through a feminine creatures veins on a secondly basis.
There arrives my beautifully feminine creature, craving for my masculine presence to allow her to escape from her emotional entanglement.
You put down the remote control, you turn to face her slowly and make eye contact, you take a deep breath to become as present with her as possible. You say "hi, come and sit down with me", again in a calm and relaxed fashion. You are there to ground her. You are her roots to the earth. You do not react or become her current state, because then you are useless to her, you cannot set her free.
As you hold eye contact, you are not listening to the words coming out her mouth, possibly referring to "that bitch at work" or her boss, or her deadline that's due...instead, you are right there with her emotionally. You are feeling her states in a hyper aware fashion. She feels this. She loves this.
You do not offer advice on her emotional states. The masculine always wants to fix things as a conclusion so the next task can be started and finished. Women do not work this way. Nothing ever finishes, it is simply felt until another emotional state takes over.
You sit there, feeling her emotions, but most importantly you are OBSERVING them, not taking them on. You must remain in the masculine. Do not become reactive or engaged in an aggressive fashion. You have 2 jobs:
1: Give her your undivided presence which she WILL feel
2: Use your presence to create another emotion within her. To set her free from her current state.
This is ultimately all you must do to seduce in every cases. This needs to be evident within every male to female interaction. This makes generalized "rejection" a thing of the past. I cannot remember the last time I have been rejected by a woman.
Number 2 is easy. As she is engaged in her frantic emotional verbalizations, it could be as easy as cutting her off and sticking your tongue out and making a fart noise. Enter shock...which turns to her erupting is laughter, completely setting her free. Then you hold her hands and smile at her, pulling her in and cuddling her, allowing her to relax into you. She knows you feel her, and she FEELS you feeling her. This gives her security in you as a man, but not physical "big muscle security"...even more important than that, it gives her mental security. She has your strength underneath her, supporting her if she chooses to fall. The difference between you and 90 percent of other men, is that you can catch her, every time! This situation can be then moved to the bedroom where you offer her physical, mental, and spiritual release.
Well done. You have avoided the most unnecessary argument known to mankind, and strengthened your bond, along with having amazing sex.
You now understands what it takes to set her free.
She will repay you endlessly with her affection and love, as you are giving her something most men cant. Raw, present, magnetic masculinity which can only set her free!
Keeping Her
It happens so much. You meet a girl, you seduce her by being a polarizing masculine being, then you begin to really like her, and everything else falls by the wayside... then she breaks up with you, and you ask why?
Cutting away from your instinct after establishing an instinctual connection with her, and changing your actions as a man out of fear of losing her, will be the direct cause of losing her.
You got lazy!
Guys often change their behaviour around a woman once they have reached their happy level of progression within the dynamic. This is out of fear, the fear of losing what you have, or what you may feel you have "worked for".
This instantly confuses a woman, and in most cases, your fear will begin to repel her from you.
Be honest with her when you reach this moment, and express yourself openly and honestly. You are both human, this is ok, this is good.
A woman never wants to be your whole world, instead, she wants to be a part of it. Remember this before you choose to change all your plans in order to accommodate this girl who you are madly in love with.
If she does not like that, she knows where the door is. The very fact of you having the ability to walk away at the drop of a hat, means that she will never leave you. Every woman wants this secure dominant emotional strength.
Never step off your own path in order to please somebody else, because the ironic thing is, they don't want you to. She does not want you to fail her test. She wants to be disciplined. This allows her to let go when she's around you, and have peace of mind that you can take care of her. This is what women want.
If she can push you off your path, this little 5 foot 5 beautiful woman, imagine what the world will do to you. This is how they think, and they do not want to stay with a man who cannot handle her.
This, is nature!
In the previous year of my life, something very strange has started to happen. Well, strange for me personally. Women, everywhere, are checking me out!
Now maybe I just was not aware of this before, but I really don't believe that. I would of noticed being blatantly eye fucked, and looked up and down with a smirk.
Previous to a year or so, I have never been approached by, or referred to as attractive by a member of the opposite sex. I also do not personally see myself as being a stereotypically handsome man, not in the slightest. I'm skinny, a little scruffy, and have a hairline that is thinning and receding more as I type. The good thing is, that this physical aspect is not important, clearly!
All of a sudden, seemingly out of the blue, I am being aggressively checked out by hoards of attractive women on a daily basis. They don't even try to hide it. I know they want me to slowly walk over and turn their world of sexuality upside down. They know I can, and they know that I KNOW I can. They can sense this at a very deep level.
Women approach me first in many cases these days. They do it with a heavy prolonged seductive glance, or a warm and sexy inviting smile. I've gotten incredibly lazy with the 'doing' aspect of seduction, basically I do fuck all, simply because all I have to focus on is the internal, and this moulds my external expression and experience. If needs be I will wave them over or call them from a distance. They come to me.
Before, I would sometimes get the compliment of 'cute', or 'nice'. Now, they describe me using words such as 'sexy', 'hot', 'overwhelming', or my favourite...'I don't know what it is, you've just got that thing'.
I feel like a piece of meat...and I love it!
The Core
Physically, nothing has changed about me in the past 4 years. Nothing. But what has changed is my internal acceptance, understanding, and power. I still do not feel physically attractive.
What I do feel, is INCREDIBLY sexy. I could walk around with a stiffy all day if I wanted. Notice I said 'feel'. I FEEL sexy!
It's become common knowledge to me lately, that in order to trigger a specific emotion or feeling in another person, you must feel it internally first. You must become that feeling, generating it internally, in order to express it within the physical and energetic body. The better, and stronger you become at doing this, the more it will transcend to the other individual(s) within your presence. You cannot expect a woman to get horny, if you don't go there first, unapologetically.
In order to get to a level of projecting this "sexy" vibe on a constant, and somewhat overwhelming basis, you must first deal with your insecurities, fears, and beliefs around the subject of sex and women. You need to clear out the internal garbage which is stopping you from releasing your true sexual masculine power. Give yourself permission.
This process differs from man to man, as we have all racked up different amounts, and different intensities when it comes to the damage of life. The damage of society. The damage of forced mediocrity.
The worst possible thing you can do is look at a man that women call sexy, and try to model yourself on his physical and external actions. It's like putting a ribbon on a turd. The fancy new pirate hat isn't fooling anyone.
It's doing things backwards, and it takes far more effort, with miniscule results, trust me, I've been there.
Why start at the superficial level? Instead of trying out a new walk, or a new voice technique you learned in GQ magazine, why don't you think and feel internal sexiness...and watch it engulf your entire presence. It will look after your body language, your eye contact, voice tone, and direction, flawlessly, and in a completely congruent way.
Practical
Right now, close your eyes, and without replaying a porn scene in your head, feel the soft warm lips of a beautiful woman engorge the tip of your penis. FOCUS! Really feel it. The texture, the heat, the wetness. Take a deep sexual breathe deep down into your lower abdomen and testicles. Fill your penis with this sexual energy.
If you can successfully feel a tingle, arousal, or the best...give yourself an erection, congratulations...you have just felt sexy without doing anything externally.
Now do this again, this time, with your eyes open, using your breathe to fill you groin. There is no need to give yourself an erection this time, but feel that energetic feeling of sexiness rush through your body. When you feel this feeling immerse you, talk. Say something out loud...walk...smile...Guess what, right now your internal expression is being pushed out to the external. You will sound different, move different, fuck it, you will LOOK different!
The more you practice this, the stronger and more instant it becomes. I can click into this seductive sexy vibe in a millisecond. Keep at it.
The Next Step
So now that you have experienced this feeling and you can physically feel it 'click into place', here comes the next step...Allowing it.
It's one thing to do this in the privacy and comfort of your own company, It really is quite easy to get lost in it, which is exactly what you want to happen in every case, but allowing this incredibly overwhelming feeling to fill you up in the presence of a woman your attracted to, this can be the scary part.
In order for you to allow yourself to feel this way in the company of others, there will be many internal battles you will come up against. Your old beliefs of what is right/wrong, socially correct, will begin to fight with your new internal projection. This is a GOOD sign, it means you are on track to systematically work on breaking all these down until they just give up and surrender, which they will eventually.
Carry a notebook, and take note of what feelings come, and the negative beliefs which are causing them. Then question every single belief to death. REALLY delve into them and expose them for the untrue and irrational fears that they are. This builds internal awareness which is king in this situation.
When your speaking to a woman, click into your seduction sexy mode. Look at her, feel her lips wrapped around your penis, feel her bare ass in your hand, you'll probably give yourself a tingle in your penis, and a smirk.
When you start allowing it to take over, it will never let you down. Your penis, will never let you down. Your masculine strength, will never let you down. Your internal animal instinct, will never let you down. Please, allow it.
The women will blush and melt before you. It is ok to look at a woman in way that signifies 'I want to eat you'. She wants you to eat her, to take her.
Allow this.
I know 100 percent, since giving myself permission to be a sexually expressive man, women have started to become incredibly attracted to me, and I have slept with more incredibly amazing women than I could ever imagine happening.
Sex is NOT bad! It's beautiful! It's a sign of great love for another human being to allow them to experience you in such an intimate and raw way. Please believe this, and allow yourself to communicate it, and give this gift to women everywhere.
This is what women want. You don't even have to put your penis inside everyone of them if you care not to, simply give them your sexual energy and presence. Make her feel like a beautiful, sexually desired woman! She will re-pay you in incredibly enjoyable ways.
Feel sexy inside, and this will change your entire external world.
Get lost in the feeling, and be present with it.
You will witness magic unfold!
No techniques. No lines. No direct. No indirect.
Just you, being a man.
A sexy man!
I would firstly like to apologise if the explanation of events is somewhat difficult to understand. I find it incredibly hard to verbalize magic. Magic is what I call the intense energetic connection felt between 2 members of the opposite sex, where one is incredibly polarizing to the other. I will do my best to get across in detail the scene, combined with the internal and external pattern and information. To me, sexual attraction and seduction is in no way based on techniques or lines, or even rules for that matter. Its magic...which comes when you are empty enough to allow it, even if it can be absolutely terrifying! (I may at times sidetrack off topic, but this is how my mind works when I'm trying to get it all out)
In she walked, and before I even laid eyes on her, her presence hit me like a brick wall. My energy left the soles of my feet and rocketed its way up to my solar plexus, then hit my chest, aggressively shifting my breathing, control vanished. This manifested in an increase in blood pressure, and what some men may refer to as "anxiety".
This feminine creature had instantly overwhelmed me, and uprooted any sense of grounding I previously had. The difference between me and the unaware man, is I felt this instantly. I immediately regained presence, and with a deep and controlled breathe, I re-rooted my energy back down to my core, and pushed my awareness back out into the environment.
I turned towards her as she beamed. We locked eyes, all I could see was her femininity, all I could feel was her lips, which In my head, were already wrapped around the cusp of my penis. She was fucking magic!
A petite short haired blonde beauty, curvy and expressive, vibrant and unchained, playful and sexy. She donned a small flowery playsuit with bright red lipstick seductively rolled along her amazingly plump lips. Her look was raw. I wanted her, every last piece of her.
I picked up on all of this within the first 3 seconds of seeing her approach my bar where I was working. This is animal instinct at its purest form making the decisions. I am allowing it to take over and call the shots. I am learning to trust it more and more in every case. It can be scary at times to leave it take over, but in its history, it has never steered me wrong. I wanted to eat her!(but not in a Ted Bundy way)
A quick side note; This night in particular I was absolutely wrecked tired, and feeling quite unequipped to deal with people in general. I am very introverted and internal, which in many ways, makes for much more powerful seductions. If you are introverted, own it, do NOT attempt to change who you are for anybody. Likewise if you are the opposite. Be you.
By the time she had reached the bar counter with her 2 friends and a few family members, she was smiling ear to ear, she knew it was on, we both felt it. I bombarded her with my lust for her and in a split second she accepted.
It is an incredible phenomena to me that I don't think I will ever understand. The power of polarizing, and the effect it has on the opposite. Here this girl was, strong and confident, acting how she is used to acting. She had an aura of "in-charge" about her. The second I let my desire for her hit, she was instantly given the permission to become the whole feminine. I was the lion, and she was the swooning blushing, fidgeting, and overwhelmed damsel. Women WANT our unapologetic sexual energy. They want to feel the effect they are having on us, because this is how they feel truly special and truly loved as an entity. Simply telling a woman they are beautiful is NOTHING compared to FEELING how beautiful she is, and allowing yourself to lose your shit in that moment. If you lose your shit without attempting to hide it...this is the key! It says so many things, profound things about the type of man you are, but most importantly, that you are authentic, and you have a deep comfort with who you are as a man. Be vulnerable, its intoxicating.
"Can I have a Vodka Lemon please", she said as she blushed uncontrollably. I held her gaze, penetrating her, for another 2 seconds, combined with a smirk, until she looked down to the side giggling, dispersing the sexual tension we were both sitting in. I eventually spoke, first I put my hand on top of hers and then leant in to her ear, "I don't even know what you have said to me, all I can see is your lips"...again she responds with blushing and giggling, while she enters even further into playful shy little girl mode. She raised her head again, and with a seductive squeeze on my hand(which says to me "keep going, this is amazing"), she repeats "Can I have a vodka lemon please". Immediately I shift into seduction mode, with my body language and voice tone clicking into an energetic frequency that makes my penis start to tingle. I respond in a slow, deep and seductive tone "and what else do you like", once again holding pressure with intense eye contact.
You know you are turning a girl on when her mother starts blushing for her!
After this, nothing fancy is needed. I simply spoke to her in a normal way with sexual intent and undertones, remaining sensual at every opportunity. I got to know her, what she did, what she liked etc. A NORMAL conversation. I never feel the need to try hard to impress or do any fancy techniques, because I already assume it's on. This conversation is simply filler, the middle part, before we are intimately consuming each other in the only way that's natural.
After about 20 minutes, I ushered her in a certain and self assured way to come to the entrance point of my bar, not with words, just with my finger. Locking eyes hard and seductively she got up smiling a very slowly strut towards me, the closer she got the harder my dick became. She got to me and I held her by the waste and pulled her in, I said "You know for the past 20 minutes all iv wanted to do is kiss you, look at what you've done to me", at this point I gently took her hand and slowly moved in down to my erect penis pressing out of my jeans. She grabbed it and let out the sexiest little gasp. I asked her was she a good kisser, face to face, she said maybe.
We kissed.
It was intense.
She waited for me to finish work, abandoning her friends and family.
She came home with me. Easily. Without question. Because she saw my authentic self. I let her in. Why would she not?
She shared something with me later that night as we lay naked and exhausted. She said that this is something she has never done before. When I asked her what made her come home with me she said: "Its because you didn't ask me to come home with you. You gave me the option. You said you can either come with me or not, there is no pressure, and you don't have to do anything you don't want to, but I would love you to"
She said that she loved this. It displayed non-neediness on my part. It says I don't need you, but I want you. I was also not aggressively pushy, but respectful of her boundaries while STILL taking constant action.
We shared 4 hours of some of the most amazing sex I've ever had....why?
Because I allowed myself to be vulnerable...I let my instinct take control....I let myself be scared...and I connected as deeply as possible to another human being. I gave her an amazing experience, an amazing taste of sexuality, love and life. She gave me the same, and I learned so much from our brief encounter, I am forever grateful for her trust in me as a man.
Magic!
I used to see this every single night in the nightclub I worked. Guys arrive, fill themselves with alcohol, then go after the far less attractive looking women, rather than going for the absolute stunners which stand beside them, looking bored, aching to interact and be fulfilled by a real man, who knows who he is, and what he wants.
Settling for less, I believe, is a disease which engulfs the majority of society, and a sickness I suffered from up to only very recently in my life. Playing it safe, and going for the "sure-shot" is something mindlessly encouraged by society, friends, and family. This is in every aspect of life from career, to financial decisions, right up to dating and love, instilling a melting pot full of limiting beliefs. How we are all told, and expected to live...
People obliviously settle!! Its "normal"!
This is evident when the handsome guy leaves with the fattest and drunkest chick at the party, simply because it was easy, with no balls required, and the safest play for his ego. Nothing is risked...
When I ask guys about why they go for the safe and less attractive girls, the answer is always the same. "Its easier to get an average girl. It's easier to fuck them."
Guess what guys...the opposite is true!!!
Let me tell you something I have discovered. In today's world, the happiest women, and the women who are getting most of the attention, and most of the sex, are the average looking. In a world of mediocrity, the mediocre women reap the benefits of the unconfident, sexually weak "play it safe" type man(boy).
Since stepping up and going for the most attractive and emotionally intelligent women, I have learned something very valuable. In most cases, the sexiest, most amazing women in this world are the loneliest, most insecure people.
They don't get aggressively approached in a dominant way such as the average looking girls. Guys are intimidated by them and assume they are untouchable. Negative mindsets such as "she's out of my league", and "she definitely won't like me, look at her" are killing guys ability to approach these very special women, or my favourite "she definitely has a boyfriend".
( A quick side note on this - A large portion of the women I end up having passionate spontaneous sex with, and amazingly deep connections, all have the mythical 'boyfriend' or 'fiancé' or 'husband'...If a woman is happy, satisfied, and connected with on an emotional level with her man, she will not stray, as she is not looking for anything. I see no issue in fulfilling a woman who needs a moment of intense clarity. As a matter of fact I see it as a great gift I am learning to continuously offer as a lover of women.)
All these beautiful and highly attractive women simply want a man that can hold her gaze and be comfortable in her presence, a man who can look at her and see past all the external superficial beauty which causes her to be immediately judged by not just men, but also just as much by other women. Fundamentally, at the core, that's it!!
Her needs are in many ways smaller than the "average" woman, simply because the average have many more options to choose from. This, is our fault as men! The beautiful are judged, placed in big dark boxes high up in lonely pedestals. They have to exist in this role on a daily basis, not allowed letting the beauty slip for one moment, because after all, then who would she be? What box does she have left?
In terms of seduction, the ironic thing is, the more attractive and overwhelming a womans presence has on you...the easier it is to seduce her, once you allow yourself to feel it and express it. What I have learned is never try to force a seductive state upon a woman who only has an average effect on you. Why would you even choose to waste your time on someone who doesn't inspire you immediately?
Ask yourself. Sincerely. Do you feel unworthy? is this why you only communicate with the women who have an average effect on your state? Do you view yourself as average? If so, this needs to be dealt with. The greater the love we have for ourselves, the greater love we can give to others.
Never forget, seduction is a 2 way street, it is shared. You cannot seduce on your own, there needs to be 2 polarizing forces dancing in sexual tension. It is a dance, which you SHARE with one another. If you make it about her, she will make it about you, and there the connection is complete. But as the man, you must be the trigger, the rock that stimulates her reaction to join this dance! This can be done with a sexual glance, a smile, or just a deep present breathe...know your role.
I find it much more "work" to seduce a woman who has less of an impact on me. The women who overwhelm me are most of the time incredibly free flowing and natural, because the projection is there, there is no need to focus on making it any stronger.
If I can't get an erection by simply being in her space, she is not for me. My instinct is governing my decision, and I'm allowing it. I don't NEED sex, I just want it, and settling for mediocre connections leads to a mediocre experience...leading to a mediocre existence.
You deserve everything!!!
Go grab it!!!
Before we bring this book to a close I would like to refer to one more aspect, which is quite problematic in our male community of dating advice/training.
DONT be the Directionless Approacher
Defining:
When you make the decision to better your life with women, a process begins, and with the majority of guys, the growth halts at a specific point, and they end up mindlessly running around in this space for weeks, months, or even years. This point is what I like to call "The Directionless Approacher".
It is one of the most empowering moments in a mans strive for romantic efficiency and independence, when he takes that first step by himself, and chooses to go against societal norms, step outside his comfort zone, look fear in the eyes, and approach the first woman of his life. This may be in the street during the day, a coffee shop, library, or by a hedge, it's irrelevant. The feeling of victory is POWERFULL. The emotional impact of taking this action is nothing to do with the girl you just went to talk to, instead, it's completely to do with you, the man, facing his fears and feeling like a boss!
Great, you took the first step.
What begins to happen at this point for many men, is they become addicted to this feeling, and put everything else to the side. They spend insanely large amounts of their daily life aimlessly chasing after women, kind of like a dog chasing his tail.
Many of the clients I see for coaching are in this exact boat. They have approached women in the thousands, with little to NO actual results in terms of sexual intimacy, connection or internal happiness.
These men hit the approacher stage, and turn into robots. They become incredible proficient at walking up to a complete stranger and getting them to stop for a short period of time, engaging usually in a word for word conversational structure which has already been dragged through the other 600 approaches before her.
I even hear of guys who tell me they are saving money and leaving their cities or towns to go to big cities like London to 'practice daygame'. WHAT THE FUCK? That mindset is one that will not serve you.
It does not matter where you are, there is always going to be some amount of women, be it large or small. In my opinion, seeing anymore than 4 girls at 1 time is not enjoyable, and is more work than its actually worth.
Now if you are moving cities to get better passion opportunities, or to see a new culture or learn about another part of the world, great do it, I recommend it...but not to practice picking up women!!! Jesus!
Passion:
I want you to think of the men in your life that you are either currently friends with, or have simply come across in your lifetime, who are incredibly successful with women. I can pretty much guarantee you that these men do not spend the majority of their days, or even a noticeable amount of time chasing or approaching women?
Instead, the guys for the most part are more concerned with doing what they are passionate about in life, whether it be setting up their own business, or being unemployed and playing music in their moms basement. Both, very different on the superficial side of things, but internally they share the same quality...self worth!!!
Both men are internally qualified by themselves, and do not have the need to look for outside validation, especially with regards to how many lays he has accumulated.
They do not NEED women....but they do WANT women.
Let's look at this scenario. A man who is not happy in himself or life feels confused and lost, as the art of interacting with women was never transferred onto him by a strong dominant male figure, i.e. father/mentor etc. (It rarely happens in our day and age unfortunately). So, he does the next best thing, he googles "how to get a girlfriend"...
This returns 1345,000,000,000 search results. He looks at some fancy websites where bulletproof guys promise him a brand new life, he watches their videos, likes their clothes, gets excited, books his training course, and it begins.
In this bootcamp he is made face his fears and approach women....blindly may I add. After this euphorical 2 days, he is now able to actively go out, and run after all the women he wants, without fear. The unfortunate issue is, all his internal loneliness, self hatred, Insecurities and confusion around who he is and what he is truly passionate about has been left completely unchecked or even questioned, swept under the rug.
So, now, he will spend his days, nights, and his emotional and physical energy desperately chasing women in order to reach whatever false sense of fulfilment is in his head, eagerly awaiting the next product release by his favourite pick up coach which he feels will fix that feeling he has of something which is still missing.
If he eventually gets to his goal, be it 10 make-outs or 5 lays(which is the proof he is worth it), then what happens? Nothing. Nothing happens.
This usually spirals, and he is left unfulfilled. Why? Because he has allowed something which is already a natural aspect of mankind take over his entire purpose.
Women become figures, numbers, and collections of digits. His ego begins to form a new perfect image of his newly found pick up persona. Words become overly practiced conversational structure. He begins to burn out, sadness ensues, and a new obsession is a must. The 'approach junkie'...its most definitely a real thing. Just walk down Oxford Street in London...you can see all the tweakers running about getting their fix.
Balance
Now, let me get back to some basics here, yes, in order to improve your life with women, you must take action, and you must interact with women, and the more you do it, the better equipped you become for dealing with the large contrasting situations which may occur. The key difference in doing it to a healthy capacity rather than a detrimental capacity is balance.
What many men are lacking in the area of seduction, is a basic understanding of what is actually seductive to the feminine. Understanding of male and female polarization is key, which is what you have been learning in this book.
A man who is aware of this foundation, does not NEED to, nor does not WANT to go out for 4 hours a day and blindly approach 50 women. How fucking damaged is that? How sad is that? What does that say about the man? Does he really deserve that beautiful women? What can this man offer her other than tips on how to go out 'sarging' or 'daygaming'? For the most part, fucking nothing.
I am being blunt here on purpose, because I want you to think, what do you have to offer a woman with your current lifestyle? I do not mean this in terms of money and fancy things, but rather in passion for life.
No woman EVER wants to be your everything, nor does she want to be your number one, or the reason you get out of bed in the morning, or why you have read those entire 75 eBooks 14 times a piece. With this understanding alone, the mere thought of spending the most part of your life 'gaming' girls seems like the worst thing to do.
GET OUT OF THE APPROACHER MINDSET!!! You are fucking yourself!
I often get asked by new clients, how many women do I personally approach per day. My response "none", but if I see a pretty girl I talk to her.
I never ever EVER leave the house with the intention of going to approach women. Why the fuck would I do such a thing? I am already happy in who I am, plus I have shit to do, that I enjoy doing...I don't need that shit. Its desperate, and women smell it off you. Stop going out to approach, instead, focus on living your life in a seductive state of mind, which again, this book has documented for you..
As I tell my students, I never go out to approach, but if I see a woman I'm attracted to as I am on my way to get some milk for my breakfast then yes, I am going to go over to say 'Hi', and this is my way of interacting throughout my daily life. I'm seductive with our without her. After you practice and implement the principles I teach here, you will eventually become what your practicing.
If you're doing 30 approaches a day, and another guy is doing none, but he is still having sex with new women every week...something isn't quite adding up is it?
If you have no reason to leave your house during the day, then let that be your first mission, and focus on changing that. Join a class, take up a hobby, go for some exercise, meditate in a beautiful area. SOMETHING!
Do NOT make women your number 1 priority for leaving your house. Just fucking don't! I have made a conscious effort to build who I am as a man ALONGSIDE building my understanding, and practical action when it comes to seduction. I have tried many things in my life to develop myself and be as well rounded and spontaneously driven as possible.
I am a club DJ, I spent close to 5 years on commercial radio as a broadcaster, I've worked in a fast food take away, I am a barman, a writer, a PR worker, meditation coach, dating coach, black belt in Karate, a qualified Acupuncturist with a degree in TCM, I have spent 2 years in broadcasting college, on top of much more. I am currently 26. Passion!
Be passionate about SOMETHING!
The above point is not a desperate attempt to show off or to 'DHV'(shudder), it's to show you that even though I have put a great deal of my life into getting better with women (which I am still doing) I have spent just as much of that time relentlessly chasing passions, and expanding the concept of who I am. I am not exclusively any of the above. I am all of those things, and none of those things. We are fluid entities who can do and be anything we want to. So why choose mediocre?
When a woman asks me what I do...I can only ever answer with "lots of things", which pitter out over time in our getting to know one another.
STOP making women your priority! Balance.
Yes, interact with women every day, as many of them which attract you...but do not be going out to find them. Structure your lifestyle around it. Why not join a yoga class where there is going to be a very large amount of spiritual, bendy feminine creatures, also looking to improve themselves...all of which are wearing yoga pants may I add. Go there!
Understand what it means to be seductive, how to use sexual tension etc. Far less energy is needed than what you are already most likely putting into 'impressing' women.
I'm going to Leave it at that, and hopefully I have inspired some of you to re-think your current way of life, and see what is truly possible.
If you need guidance on this road, contact me, and I will get you there.
For info on my one-on-one online coaching packages , along with live infield training visit:
www.masculineintent.com
Il leave you with the question; "Do you TRULY love women?"
Chris Bale – www.masculineintent.com
THANK YOU!
Thank you again for downloading this book!
I hope this book was able to entertain, educate, and inspire you. I hope this book has excited you, and instilled some drive, to go out and start taking control of your life, you deserve it!
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Other books you may enjoy reading :
My Journey Through Seduction: Failures, Pick-up, Anxiety, and Success