“You’re making a mistake,” my brother Cooper tells me as he adjusts his bike gears.
“It’s a foolproof plan,” I argue, wanting my brother’s agreement. Hell, at this point, I need Cooper to tell me I’m not fucking up my friendship with Avery or my relationship with Raia by pretending to be her man for a few weeks.
“It’s a disaster waiting to happen,” Cooper shuts me down.
I sigh and turn away as I take a few steps toward his open garage door. Lacing my fingers together, I brace my hands behind my head and think this through.
A few days ago, when Raia laid out her plan for Avery and by extension, me, it made sense. It’s simple and straightforward. We go on a few dates, let the town speculate, have a great ski weekend, and amicably break up before going our separate ways.
But…that kiss. I keep circling back to the way I felt pressing my mouth against hers, her soft skin under my fingertips, strands of her hair grazing my knuckles.
Kissing Raia Callaway changed things and I don’t know how to reconcile that with reality. I’m her fake boyfriend. Nothing else.
“Why are you doing this anyway?” Cooper asks. “I mean, I know you’re going to do it regardless. You’ve already committed and now, you’re backtracking, trying to get my blessing.”
I glare at him. He grins and lifts an eyebrow.
“It’s because I’m your older brother,” he explains.
“Fuck,” I snort. He’s right. I always do things the way I want but at some point, I turn to Cooper. I want his understanding. I want to know that no matter what happens, he has my back.
And he always does.
“So, why’d you say yes? I know Raia’s like a kid sister to you and you’d do anything for her, but agreeing to be her fake date seems kind of…counterintuitive? Incestuous?”
I swear as I try to form a better response.
Counterintuitive? One-hundred percent. I’m fucked up over a kiss with a woman I shouldn’t be kissing in the first place.
Incestuous?
“What the hell, bro? She’s not actually my sister,” I blurt out defensively.
This time, Cooper is quiet. He watches me closely for several seconds before swearing and standing from the milk crate he plopped down on. “You fucking like her.” His tone holds an accusatory note I can’t deny. “Oh, fuck, Cohen. This is worse than I thought. Not only are you getting nothing out of this little arrangement—”
“I’m helping a friend. Someone I care about.”
“But you’re already conflicted about it because you like her.”
“She’s an awesome woman. Everyone likes her,” I backpedal.
Cooper laughs. “It’s not the same thing and you know it. She’s your best friend’s little sister!”
“I know!” I shout back, throwing out an arm. “Jesus, Coop, you think I don’t know that?”
Cooper backs off and regards me carefully. “What changed?”
“I kissed her. Once. It was supposed to get the gossip circles going. It wasn’t supposed to mean anything but…”
“But it changed everything,” he supplies gently.
“Every fucking thing,” I confirm. “And now, I’m supposed to casually date her, go on a ski trip, and then break up so we can carry on with our lives like this never happened. Like it means nothing. And you should’ve seen her laying it out for Avery, Coop. She’s so direct and to the point. No feelings, no hang-ups, no mental agony over a kiss. It was just a goddamn kiss.”
“Why’d you say yes?” Cooper asks again.
I shake my head and grip the back of my neck. “I can’t ever say no to Raia. Never could, never will. But now, it’s more complicated.”
“I’ll say.”
“I need to help her save face, Cooper.”
“Yeah,” he agrees, dipping his head in understanding. “I just hope you don’t lose yours in the process.” He sighs and taps my arm. Giving me a searching look, he smirks. “I got your back, Cohen. Whatever you need. But brace for impact, brother, because this shit isn’t going to be nearly as straightforward as you think. It’s gonna be messy and complicated. It’s got little Raia Callaway stamped all over it.”
I snort in agreement. “She always makes an entrance.”
“That girl is larger than life. It’s not a surprise a dick named Brooks couldn’t keep up with her.” Cooper tilts his head thoughtfully. “I think you could though. But you’ve gotta be all in, Cohen. Don’t take this the wrong way but the only thing I’ve ever seen you fully commit to is football. And Raia Callaway is an all-in or nothing kind of girl.” He gestures toward the garage door, and we exit.
The sunlight assaults my eyes and I slip on a pair of aviator sunglasses as Cooper closes the garage door and locks up.
“Just remember…” He pauses a beat. “You have the power to hurt her just as much as she can crush you. Proceed cautiously,” he warns before walking toward his car. “I’ll see you at Mom and Dad’s.”
“Yeah,” I agree, moving toward my ride and slipping into the driver’s seat.
I pull out of my brother’s driveway and follow him to our parents’ house for our regular weekly dinner.
Cooper’s right. I’ve never committed to anything other than football and Raia is an all or nothing kind of girl. But this is supposed to be fake!
Except it feels more legit than any relationship I’ve ever had.
Raia means more to me than any woman I’ve dated.
Nothing about this is simple or straightforward.
It’s a disaster waiting to happen. And I’m at the center of the storm.
Cooper was also right about me moving forward with the commitment I made. It’s a Campbell thing—we take our word seriously. So, even though I have concerns about Raia’s plan, I’m still diving in headfirst.
That night, after a family dinner and hanging out at my parents’, I text Raia.
Cohen
Raia
Cohen
Raia
Cohen
Raia
Cohen
Raia
Cohen
Raia
I wince at her use of the word fucked. I’ve never heard Raia use profanity until this recent trip home. But it makes sense; she is an adult now. She certainly looks and acts like a grown-up. A woman.
But part of me still remembers her with affection.
While another part of me wants her with a longing that feels both undeniable and wrong. Forbidden.
It’s a head trip.
Cohen
Raia
Cohen
Raia
Cohen
Cohen
I need to shut this down. While bantering with Raia is amusing, it’s also pointless. It doesn’t further her objective and it confuses me.
Raia
Cohen
Raia
“What the fuck?” I mutter, tossing down my phone.
I don’t know what to make of Raia right now. She’s still playful and funny, like always, but there’s an undercurrent of flirtation.
Or am I reading into it because my feelings toward her are evolving?
Reaching into my closet, I pull out a pair of jeans and a knit, short-sleeve shirt. I need to pretend this is a date. I’m notorious for taking my dates to fancy restaurants to wine and dine them.
The fact that Raia and I are grabbing a drink at Corks will play into her favor. I’m mixing things up, doing something different. It will allow our neighbors to wonder if it’s real. Given our history, I think most people will assume it is.
I just need to remember it’s not. It’s playing pretend.
Isn’t that what Raia said?
I slip into my threads and fix my hair.
It can be as fake as she wants but I’m sure as hell going to look good doing it.