Salt

CATHY CULTICE LENTES

After my hysterectomy,

a friend dreams of us shopping,

filling pillowcase after pillowcase

with salt,

our carts so heavy,

we strain like shackled slaves

to inch them down the aisle.

She confesses, in her dream

she feared I coveted

her brimming cases;

strangely, in daylight,

I am embarrassed,

find myself explaining

I would never steal her salt.

What can this mean?

Reason says nothing—

her dream, her salt—

but a grain has lodged

in some dark chamber,

an irritation an oyster might

worry for self-preservation.

Does she think me greedy,

unrefined, untrustworthy,

needy on a basic level?

Why pillowcases?

Why so much, and only,

salt? We laugh it off,

but the taste lingers.

In the days of my recovery,

when medicines stir

within me a turbulent,

nauseating sea, I keep turning

back, a pillar of doubt,

recounting sins, those salted wounds,

no knife or drug can treat.