Ryan took Kelly to the doctor the next day. She’d assumed that she would go to the doctor. As in alone. And that Ryan would go back to work since he’d been out of the office for nearly a week.
But he’d ridden with her, gone into the exam room with her and stuck to her side throughout the entire appointment.
The doctor made noises about the swelling and noted that there was still protein in her urine. He asked her endless questions about how she felt and then issued a stern lecture about taking it easy.
Ryan latched on to every word and by the time they left, Kelly was sure that he’d lock her in her bedroom and not allow her out until the baby was born.
She was prepared to be stir-crazy in advance, but he said nothing. When they arrived back at the apartment, he didn’t make her prop her feet up even though that was precisely what she did as soon as they walked through the door.
“I think as long as you don’t overdue it that there’s no reason you can’t get around in moderation,” Ryan said. “The doctor was in agreement that we just need to watch you closely for any change and be sensitive to when you’re not feeling well to make sure it doesn’t develop into something more serious.”
Thank God he was prepared to be reasonable.
“I thought we could eat out tonight if you feel up to it. It’s cold but it’s not supposed to snow or sleet. I know you like going out.”
Touched that he’d remembered—although she wasn’t sure why he wouldn’t—she smiled and nodded in excitement. She did love the city at night. Loved the lights, the cozy restaurants and little hole-in-the-wall cafés and local eateries.
“I sent Jansen out for warmer clothing and a coat for you. Just until you feel up to shopping for yourself,” he said. “I’ll go with you when you want to. Just say the word.”
Knowing how much Ryan hated shopping, she was touched and idiotically emotional over the fact that he’d offered to go with her.
“We should also think about going shopping for the baby very soon,” Ryan said in a husky voice.
She blinked in surprise. But then she stared down at her belly and realized that he was right. She only had a short time—weeks—until the baby would arrive. Six weeks? But babies often came early. And she was horribly unprepared.
In Houston she’d lived from paycheck to paycheck, just praying to be able to make rent and save money for when she had to take time off when the baby was born. There hadn’t been money for all the things people bought in preparation for a baby, so she’d never even thought about it.
Panicked now that she realized how unprepared she was, she stared in dismay at Ryan.
“Hey,” he said as he scooted over next to her. “I didn’t mean to stress you out. I thought you’d be excited to shop for the baby.”
“I don’t have anything,” she confessed. “No baby clothing. No crib. Diapers. Oh God, I don’t even know what-all I need. I was always happy to just make it through another day in Houston. I never looked ahead. It was too overwhelming.”
He gathered her in his arms and held her as he ran his hand soothingly over her hair. “There’s no hurry, okay? I’ll send out for some parenting books and magazines and for the next few days, I want you to rest, put your feet up and do as much reading as you like. Make a list. We’ll look at stuff together. It’ll be fun. We still have plenty of time before she gets here.”
She squeezed him in a tight hug. “Thank you. I think you just prevented a meltdown. I feel so awful. I don’t even have any cute baby booties. What kind of mother am I going to be?” she asked mournfully.
He squeezed her back. “You’ll be a wonderful mom. You’ve had a lot to deal with. Cut yourself some slack, okay? Now why don’t you go take a long soaking bath and get ready for dinner?”
She reached up and pulled him down to kiss him. It was on the tip of her tongue to say she loved him, but she swallowed the words and kissed him again instead.
He kissed her back, lingering over her lips, savoring the taste and feel of her.
It shouldn’t make her feel so sad that she still loved him. But she couldn’t shake the heaviness from her chest as she pulled away and then got up and headed for the bathroom.
“I got a call from Rafael today,” Ryan said over dinner.
Kelly frowned. “How is he doing? I still can’t believe he got into a plane crash, lost his memory and then fell in love with a woman he completely screwed over for land.”
Ryan winced. “You make it sound so…”
She lifted an eyebrow. “Awful? I know he’s your friend, but he’s always been arrogant and a bit of a jerk. Especially toward women. He never liked me.”
“Rafe has changed. I know it sounds weird, but after his accident he did a one-eighty. Anyway, he and Bryony are back from their honeymoon and they’re coming into town in a few days to put his apartment on the market.”
“He’s moving?”
That shocked Kelly. Rafael was an urbanite through and through. He loved the city. Loved to travel. She couldn’t imagine him anywhere else.
“Yeah, he and Bryony are going to maintain a residence on Moon Island.”
“Wow. Rafael must really be in love.”
“Amazing what men in love will do for the women they love,” Ryan said softly.
Kelly didn’t meet his gaze and concentrated instead on her soup. Lobster bisque. After six months of bland diner food, she savored every bite. Her taste buds were all simultaneously orgasming.
She’d eaten more in the past week than she had in all those months in Houston, and she was going to balloon like a blowfish if she kept this up. She’d even closed her eyes when they’d weighed her at her doctor’s appointment the previous day, not wanting to know how much weight she’d gained.
“He wants us all to get together.”
Her eyes narrowed. “Define us.”
“Me, you, Dev and Cam and, of course, Rafael and Bryony. I also thought it would be good to invite Mom so you’d have the buffer of other people. We can get it over with in one clean sweep.”
It sounded like an evening from hell, not that she’d admit that to him. She couldn’t imagine anything worse than being surrounded by Ryan’s closest friends, who of course all had been told that she’d cheated on Ryan with Jarrod. She nearly bared her teeth in response to that thought. And then there was his darling mother. All the evening lacked was…Jarrod.
“And Jarrod?” she asked icily.
“He won’t be invited. I wouldn’t do that to you, Kell,” Ryan said quietly.
“When is this supposed to take place?”
“Next week. Probably at the end of the week. They’ll be busy organizing his apartment. We’ll eat at Tony’s. You like it there. It’s nice and casual. We can leave at any time and there won’t be any obligation to stay and visit.”
She sighed. She had to hand it to him. He was working hard to make things as easy for her as possible. The least she could do is be accommodating. His friends were important to him. His mother was important to him.
“All right,” she said in a low voice. “Of course we can go.” She forced a smile. “It’ll be nice to see everyone again.” She nearly choked on the lie, but the relief in Ryan’s eyes made it worth it.
He reached for her hands. “We’re going to make it this time, Kell.”
She caught his fingers and returned his squeeze. “It makes me feel better to know you think so.”
“Do you have doubts?”
“I’d be lying if I said I didn’t. I’m scared witless. I’m scared to go out of your apartment,” she said honestly. “I don’t like the person I’ve become, but it doesn’t change the fact that I’m a very different person than the Kelly you knew. I’m more cautious now. I’m…harder. I don’t like it about myself, but I’ve learned to be that way out of necessity.”
He took her hand in both of his and propped his elbows on the table as he stared over at her.
“Marry me.”
She jerked her hand back in shock and stared at him. “What?” Where the hell had that come from?
“Marry me.”
He withdrew one hand and then reached into his pocket to pull out a small ring box. With his thumb, he flipped it open and she saw a stunning diamond ring nestled in velvet.
He held it out to her and she lifted her gaze to stare at him as if he’d lost his mind.
“I couldn’t decide whether or not to give you back your old one or buy you a new one. I kept the old ring. I kept it with me the entire time you were gone. But then I decided that we deserve a fresh start. So I bought a new one for a new beginning.”
Her hand trembled in his and she stared speechlessly at him.
He ruefully shook his head. “I know it’s not the most romantic proposal. It’s not even under the best circumstances. I’d intended to wait. Until it was the right time. Until we’d sorted out things between us. But I couldn’t wait any longer. And when my friends and family see you again, I want them to know that we’re together, that you’re the woman I’m going to marry and that you have my support.”
Tears filled her eyes and her chest ached with emotion. He made no move to take the ring out of the box and put it on her finger for her. He simply held it in the palm of his hand, waiting for her to make the decision.
“But Ryan,” she began helplessly. “There’s so much… The past…”
“Shh,” he murmured. “I know what you’re saying. We have a lot to talk about. We have a lot to work out. But I wanted to do this first so that you know that no matter what comes out when we eventually revisit the past that I still want to marry you. I need you to know that. Maybe it’ll help. Maybe it’ll make it easier knowing that it won’t change things between us now.”
She wiped furiously at the moisture on her cheeks, determined not to ruin the moment by breaking down. “In that case, yes. I’ll marry you.”
He looked thunderstruck, like maybe he really hadn’t expected her to agree. And then he smiled and such joy flashed across his face that it left her breathless. His eyes lit up and his grip on her hand tightened until her fingertips were bloodless.
He fumbled with the box, took the ring out. The hand he held hers with shook as he positioned her finger so he could slide the ring on.
Then he leaned across the table and kissed her. When he pulled away, he still held her hand and he suddenly stood, pulling her to her feet.
“Let’s go,” he said hoarsely. “Let’s go home where we can be alone. I just want to hold you away from everyone else.”
She went willingly into his arms and they walked past the other diners, uncaring of the stares they received. She never felt the cold, brisk air as they exited the restaurant and walked to the curb where Ryan’s car waited.
For once she felt warm on the inside. After feeling cold and alone for so long, sunshine rushed through her veins.