You’ve Been Schooled!
“You’re late!” Professor Sebastian growls when he sees us.
Jack and Allison Grace, Beauty and the Beast’s daughter, are the only two sitting in the room—we have a very small Magical Metamorphosis class. AG’s jaw drops when she notices our squishy shoes and very wet clothes. Jack bursts out laughing.
“Where were you?” the professor asks, saying nothing about our awkward appearance.
“We decided to go for a swim, sir,” Ollie jokes as Maxine, Jocelyn, Jax, Kayla, and I quickly take our seats. The professor doesn’t laugh.
“Um, we were in detention,” Kayla tells him.
“Impossible!” the professor barks, but then he thankfully takes a few deep breaths.
We don’t need him getting all beastly in the middle of class. AG is pretty good at calming him down, but Beauty is better, and I haven’t seen her in the castle today. Come to think of it, it’s a little strange that neither one of them was in the meeting in the detention room.
He runs a hand through his long, thick brown hair and raises one very hairy eyebrow at Ollie. “What I mean is, there is no detention in the middle of the day.”
“There is if you’re caught spying on your teachers while they have a secret meeting with the royal court.” Maxine shifts around in her extra-large chair with a giant squeak.
“Maxine!” we scold.
“Sorry!” She blushes. “I can’t help but be honest, and I don’t like getting in trouble.” She looks at the professor again. “We were spying, sir. And we were caught.”
I jump in before Maxine can do any more damage. “Actually, sir, I noticed you weren’t in the meeting with the rest of the royal court. Can I ask why?”
He slams a stack of scrolls down on his desk. “Some of us believe that focusing on our students’ rehabilitation is just as important as chasing after Rumpelstiltskin. If any of you spent half as much time on your grades as you did on battle plans, your scores wouldn’t be this terrible!”
Fiddlesticks. I think those are our “Issues of the Fairy World” papers. The paper on top of the stack has a giant red F. That’s not good. I didn’t put a lot of time into this paper because I was helping Jax draw up a new evacuation plan from the school, but I’m sure I didn’t do that bad. I wonder whose grade that is?
“You all got F’s!” Professor Sebastian thunders, getting wound up again.
Yowza.
Maxine’s lower lip trembles. “Are we getting kicked out of the class?”
He whirls around. His chest is heaving up and down. “No. Because then we’d have no class!” He motions to AG and Jack. “Two students is not enough for a Magical Metamorphosis study program, but maybe we shouldn’t have one. None of you are doing a very good job undergoing a metamorphosis anyway.” He lifts one of the scrolls and begins reading our papers. “Listen to these questions and answers.” He clears his throat. “‘If you wanted to go the Festival of the Fairies but didn’t have a ride, what would you do?’” He looks at us. “The majority of you answered, ‘I’d steal a ride or hide in someone’s carriage to get there.’ That’s not what you do!”
I don’t dare ask why. Is hiding in the back of a perfectly good empty carriage so wrong?
“And this one,” Professor Sebastian continues. “‘If you were in the middle of the village and saw a troll break into the Three Little Pigs restaurant, what would you do?’” He looks up. “Ollie answered: ‘Follow him into the store, tie him up with magical binds, and question him about what he’s doing there.’”
The rest of us mumble in agreement.
“No!” Professor Sebastian sounds exasperated. “The correct answer is: ‘Call the Dwarf Police Squad for help.’”
“But what if we’re able to help on our own?” Jax asks.
“That’s not your job! Your job is… Well, I don’t know what any of your jobs are yet, because you’re all too busy worrying about what’s going on with Alva and Rumpelstiltskin to figure that out!”
“Sounds like someone else I know,” AG mutters as she stares at the top of her desk and fiddles with a quill. I hear our teacher growl, but AG doesn’t back down. “It’s true! You spent years tailing the little twerp, locked away in your office reading books and trying locator spells. After what he pulled in Cloud City, can you blame any of us for trying to prepare for the day he shows up here?”
I brace for impact. And by impact, I mean a roar of explosion from Professor Sebastian.
Instead, he’s quiet. So quiet, I can hear the ticking of the cuckoo clock on the wall behind his gold desk and the hum of Miri’s mirror behind his head. (I feel like she’s always watching and listening even when her mirror is dark.) He strokes his beard, takes a seat on his desk, and looks at us.
AG crouches down in her chair, and Jax and I glance at each other nervously. What is he going to do?
“You’re right,” he says, and I nearly fall out of my chair. “I wasted too many years worrying about that man and thought too little of myself.” He stares out a stained glass window that has a view of the empty courtyard. “While your mother studied books and taught you about the world, I locked myself away to hunt a man who had already imprisoned me for far too long.” He looks at me in particular. “It’s easy to be consumed by anger. It’s harder to learn to let things go. I guess I don’t want the same for any of you.”
Who is this imposter, and what has he done with my teacher? Should I poke him to make sure he’s not Hologram Professor Sebastian? Because this doesn’t sound like the cranky pants we all know…and er, tolerate.
“I’m sorry, AG. You’re right about me,” he tells his daughter.
“I am?” AG asks.
“I want you all to use your time at Fairy Tale Reform School wisely. Who do you want to be when you leave this place? This is why I give you tests like the one you just had. Not to torture you, but to prepare you. We can all worry about when that man may try to break down the door, or you can think about what you will do with your future. In the end, we all know that evil never really wins. So what will you do when the dust settles? Who are you?”
If I wasn’t so wet and waterlogged, I might hug the man. He brings up a good point… Oh no, Maxine, don’t!
“Thank you, sir!” She tackles him in a big bear hug. “I needed that today! Everyone has been so cranky and down. We should just be happy when we have the chance.”
AG stifles a giggle, but Professor Sebastian is straight-faced as he pries Maxine off him. He smooths out his red, velvet jacket. “Very true, Maxine. So what do you plan to do when you leave FTRS?”
Maxine gives him a toothy grin. “I’m thinking I’d like to open up a school for toddlers, like Mother Goose did. I have a way with children once they get used to my appearance, and I think I’d be quite good at playing games like Duck, Duck, Goose, and singing nursery rhymes.”
He strokes his beard. “I could see that.”
“So could I,” I say, and Peaches quacks in agreement. I didn’t even realize Maxine had her hidden in a bag by her desk. The prince doesn’t say anything about it though. Instead, he looks at me.
“And what about you, Gillian? Where do you see yourself?”
I think for a moment before speaking. “I think I’d make a good police chief. We all know Pete drops the ball a lot. He’s never around when we really need him. I’m good in a fight, and I know how to navigate a battle…most times.” I try hard not to think about what happened in Cloud City with Anna. “I think I’d be good for Enchantasia.”
Jax grins. “Chief Cobbler. It has a nice ring to it.”
Maxine wipes her nose. “You’d make a good chief! I’d vote for you!”
“I’m not sure I see it—feels so rigid and dull,” Jocelyn says. “I’d rather open a dark magic shop and teach people how to defend themselves like Red Riding Hood, but to each her own.”
I’m feeling pretty confident till I hear Jack snicker. I turn around.
“No offense, but no one is going to name you police chief,” he says.
“That’s rude of you to say,” Jax starts.
“She’s a thief!” Jack reminds us. “They’d never put a criminal in charge of public safety. The royal court would never go for it, and you all know it.”
AG frowns, her porcelain-white face crumpling. “Jack might be right.”
“This kingdom would be lucky to have me,” I argue. “I’ve faced many villains, and I’m still here. The people would love me.”
“While that might be true, Mr. Spriggins has a point,” Professor Sebastian says. “This kingdom might have a hard time feeling comfortable with a former thief in a position of power.”
“Forget I even brought it up.” I fold my arms, focusing my attention on the window so I don’t have to make eye contact with anyone. “It was a stupid idea anyway.”
“No, it’s not!” Maxine says. “It’s a wonderful idea! You shouldn’t give it up because Jack or even Professor Sebastian doesn’t think it can happen. You have to make it happen!”
Jocelyn rolls her eyes. “I think I found a better career for Maxine—inspirational speaker.”
We all laugh, even me, and then I feel bad. Maxine hangs her head. “I’m just kidding, Maxine,” I say. “But life isn’t all sunshine and fairy gardens.”
“But it could be.” Maxine is not deterred. She leans forward, making her desk wobble. “If we all focused on what we have right now, instead of worrying about all that could go wrong, we’d be so much happier.”
“Here she goes again,” Ollie mumbles.
“Professor Sebastian is giving us a chance to think about our futures.” Maxine continues, “We should be exploring our passions and walking through the village, thinking about where we see ourselves. We should be trying new jobs on for size! Not worrying about battles!”
“Maxine is right,” Professor Sebastian says, and my head almost spins off. “You all need a dose of reality. Being cooped up in this castle with all these Wanted scrolls and battle drills is making you forget there is still a life out there that people are living!”
“Yes!” Maxine agrees.
“So to make up for how terribly you all did on your test, you’re going to live the real-world version of it for bonus points to bring up your grades.” Professor Sebastian gives us a beastly grin. “Your assignment: an outing in the village to explore potential career paths. I’ll clear it with Professor Flora,” he adds, stroking his beard some more, “but I think Maxine has had a wonderful idea. You will interview people in your potential lines of work, and then I’ll give you some money to buy breakfast and lunch. We will see how you do interacting with the public and working with a budget. It will be a great exercise!”
Maxine beams.
Kayla is taking notes. “How long should the essay on our experience be, sir?”
I glare at her. Who said anything about an essay?
“No essay! You’ll give an oral presentation on the experience. This way I can ask follow-up questions.” Everyone begins talking at once. “Now, I must end class early. I have a lunch date with Beauty, but I will be in touch about your field trip date. I’m sure I can schedule it this week.”
“Nice going, Maxine,” Jocelyn whispers as we gather our things.
“It is nice, isn’t it?” Maxine asks dreamily.
“Gillian?” Professor Sebastian calls as everyone files out. “Hold on, will you? I’d like to give you a second assignment.”
I get two things for homework when they all have one? What gives! “Sir?”
“I’m going to have Miri speak with Pete at the Dwarf Police headquarters,” says Professor Sebastian, staring down at me. “Maybe if you interview him and learn more about being a police chief, it will help you decide if this is a job you want to someday fight for.” He puts a hand on my shoulder. “Important things should always be fought for.”
I’m surprised, but I try not to show it. “Thank you, sir.”
“You’re welcome,” he says and actually smiles. His teeth are really white. “Oh, and Gillian? Let’s get a date on the calendar for you and me to talk more about Rumpelstiltskin. If you and I put our heads together, I think we can learn how to separate the man from the myth and figure out his weaknesses.” He raises an eyebrow. “That could be the real clue to beating him at his own game, you know.”
I smile. “I’d like that.”
Beast or man, Professor Sebastian is much wiser than I realized.