Singing Exercise
MILTON: Did you watch the Lena Horne video I told you about?
ACTRESS: I did. I hated it.
MILTON: What didn’t you like?
ACTRESS: I felt it was too affected.
Milton turns to the other students in the room.
MILTON: Nobody moves, I got the room covered. (Back to actress:) Affected, huh?
ACTRESS: Yeah.
MILTON: Hang on, folks, this could be major. Tell us your idea of affected.
ACTRESS: Put-on. Not done from the heart.
MILTON: Phony?
ACTRESS: Yes.
MILTON: Lena Horne?
ACTRESS: In this, she was.
MILTON: Anything else? You’re already on your way to Siberia. I guess my connection with the Mafia didn’t work. They were supposed to threaten your nieces and nephews, straighten you out.
Beat.
I don’t get big laughs here because people think I really am connected to the Mafia. Okay, what else didn’t you like about Lena?
ACTRESS: I felt at times that she was very bitter towards white people.
MILTON: So? What’s wrong with that? I understand that point of view.
ACTRESS: Well, I didn’t like it.
MILTON: Let me tell you why I think you really don’t like her: Because she’s ballsy. Out there. Willing to be counted. These are all aspects you have within you, but that you’re fighting. Lena doesn’t fight against herself. She communicates, and doesn’t apologize for it. Your criticism keeps you away from these qualities that she has. You criticize her so you don’t have to do the things she does. What you criticize you can’t get.
Actress starts crying.
MILTON (Ironically): I guess I should cry, too, because apparently I’ve totally missed the mark here, haven’t I?
Actress laughs through the crying.
MILTON: Don’t you see? Lena is putting it all out there. Everything. She’s sexual, she’s openly emotional. She lets it all hang out. She can be anything she wants. She’s a goddess. She’s bitter about whites. So what? She’s not censoring.
ACTRESS: No, not any of it.
MILTON: She’s out there cracking the whip. You can’t not like her. You, especially, have to like her. She is landmark audacious. You’ve got to be inspired by her. You’ve got to say, “Let my hatred of blacks out, my hatred of whites out, my love of blacks out, my love of whites out, everything out.” Let everything out. What are you saving it for?
ACTRESS: I’m not loose at all. I protect myself. I am so uncomfortable in front of an audience.
MILTON: Okay. Tell us these awful things the audience can do to you, your nightmare.
ACTRESS: Go to sleep.
MILTON: They could go to sleep. Good. What else?
ACTRESS: They could yawn. Or laugh. You know, like laughing uncontrollably.
MILTON: I see. What else?
ACTRESS: They could leave.
MILTON: The ultimate. Leave while you’re singing. I got you. Is there anybody when you look out there, that you feel doesn’t want you to be a star?
ACTRESS: You mean right here in the class?
MILTON: No, over in Canoga Park. Yes—here in the class. Right here.
ACTRESS: I know somebody.
MILTON: Who?
ACTRESS: You mean, point them out?
MILTON: That’s what Lena would do.
ACTRESS: Oh god....
MILTON: Do it. Go ahead, do it.
ACTRESS (Pointing to a student): I think she thinks I take too much time in class. She’s like, “This is an acting class—why are we spending time on singing?”
MILTON: And your response?
ACTRESS: That I’m a singer and an actress. And this is my class, too. Music is a big part of me, and so this is part of my trip.
MILTON: Good. Pretty clear. No one collapsed or anything from you saying that. The theatre is still standing. Anything else you want to say to her?
ACTRESS: I think she envies me—the way I sing, the way I look. Part of why I’m studying acting is to bring myself out so I’m a better singer. I’m sorry if that disturbs anybody.
MILTON: Good. (Indicating another student) What about him?
ACTRESS: I think he doesn’t care. I feel as I’m singing that he’s totally disinterested. Bored.
MILTON: Okay. Pretty clear.
ACTRESS: God, everybody’s going to hate me after this!
MILTON: You want to know something funny? The only way to really be loved is to say how you feel. When you’re honest, people trust you. Like Clark Gable in Gone With the Wind: “Frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn.” And we love him for saying it. This is also about not being afraid to be disliked. Do you think Lena’s worried all the time about who likes her?
ACTRESS: She couldn’t give a shit.
MILTON: Anybody else?
ACTRESS: No, no. That’s enough.
MILTON: Very good. See? And you haven’t died yet. Good. In every audience, by the way, there is every person in the performer’s life. Literally or in your mind, your father’s here, your mother’s here, your boyfriend, your girlfriend, everybody’s here. So the idea is to train yourself not to be afraid of an audience. Say to them what you feel, be audacious, don’t hold back. Connect with them and affect them. Be open. Say to them what they can’t say to themselves. Your feelings and your singing must hit them where they live.
ACTRESS: Right.
MILTON: What would you like to say to this august body? About your singing, about you, about your life.
ACTRESS (Getting emotional): I care too much. I care too much that you like me. And I can’t care anymore because it’s killing me.
MILTON: Sing now. While you’re full of emotion. Come on, sing that song.
Actress sings. She’s emotional, strong, more alive in her performance than she’s ever been.
MILTON: Come on, that’s it, keep going....
Song ends, to huge applause.
MILTON: Alright. Understand? Lena did that every night of the week.