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“As you ramble on through life, whatever be your goal, keep your eye on the donut, and not on the hole.”
—The Optimist’s Creed of Mayflower Donuts
THE COFFEE FROM NESSA’S donut shop tasted like Christmas with bits of peppermint and cinnamon sprinkled over the mound of whipped cream she’d piled on top. I breathed in the piping-hot, sugary goodness and resisted the urge to skip down the docks with a box of equally sugary donuts balanced in my opposite hand.
I was earlier than usual, but I wanted to get a jumpstart on the day since I’d be leaving most of the workload to my apprentices. Jenni had Regina shuffle some harvests around so Kevin and Eliza wouldn’t have anything too challenging to tackle without me. I’d already picked out the more questionable medium-risk jobs and planned to take care of them myself before breaking off to meet with Jenni.
What I hadn’t planned on was catching my apprentices buck-naked and tangled in a bedsheet atop the hatch platform of my ship. Kevin’s mop of dark curls lay over Eliza’s shoulder, his face buried in the crook of her neck, yielding a throaty moan that had drowned out my gasp of surprise. It was the box of donuts dropping to the deck floor that finally caught their attention.
“Oh!” Eliza squealed, dragging the sheet with her as she rolled off the platform. Kevin grasped for a corner of the sheet but was too late. I turned away long enough to give him time to cover himself with a pillow.
“It’s like forty degrees out here. What the hell is wrong with you two?”
“We had a blanket,” Kevin said, searching the deck floor beneath the platform. Tom and Felix, the pair of helljacks Kevin had kept from Coreen’s litter, yipped at us from the poop deck. Kevin scowled up at them. “A little late now.”
“How long has this been going on?” I asked, feeling completely out of touch. Why was I always the last to know these things?
“Uh...” Kevin made a strangled noise in the back of his throat. “You mean the sex?”
“Since last night,” Eliza snapped, covering her face with her free hand to hide her embarrassment. She raked her fingers through her short afro before adding in a gentler voice, “I’m so sorry, boss. It won’t happen again.”
“Really? It won’t?” Kevin pouted.
I bent down to retrieve the box of donuts, cracking the lid to inspect them. Thankfully, they’d survived the ride. “I don’t care what or who you do in your free time,” I said. “Just maybe don’t do it right out in the open. Come on, guys. Anyone could have walked up that ramp and gotten a peep show.”
“Got it.” Eliza pointed a finger at me. “I’ll just grab a quick shower and put on some clothes,” she added as Kevin scooted off the platform.
“Ditto,” he said, then nodded at the donut box. “Save me a chocolate one.”
I averted my gaze again as he trotted off toward the main cabin, a pillow held over his crotch. Eliza chewed her bottom lip as she stared after him. Her dark skin glistened with sweat despite the frigid temperature, but I doubted the shiver that shook her shoulders had anything to do with the cold.
“Boston cream still your favorite?” I asked, breaking her lusty daze.
“What?” She blinked at me and then the donuts. “Oh! Yeah. That’s perfect. I’ll... be right back.”
I half expected her to follow Kevin, but she made a beeline for the forecastle cabin. Maybe they really were a new thing. Good for them.
If Eliza dated, it wasn’t something she’d ever shared with me. She’d graduated from the Reaper Academy with top marks, which meant she likely hadn’t found time to get mixed up in the Limbo City dating scene.
Kevin hadn’t dated anyone since Josie’s death. It was time for him to get back on the horse, so to speak. Of course, workplace relationships had their share of complications. That he and Eliza were both training under the same mentor could prove disastrous if whatever this was didn’t last. And as that shared mentor, I was sure I’d end up shipwrecked in the aftermath, too. But I didn’t have time to worry about that today.
Soon, my apprentices returned with damp hair and fresh robes. Kevin had found time to fix a pot of coffee and handed a cup to Eliza before having at the donut box I’d set on the corner of the hatch platform—on the opposite side from where I’d found them. A spot they hopefully hadn’t stickied while consummating their budding romance.
As they ate, I explained why I’d crashed their naked boat party and what the day would look like after I left them to go off on the council’s new quest. Kevin, who’d been present along with Ellen the last time I’d encountered a pre-mortem original believer, was none too surprised. I had the feeling he’d expected this and had been waiting for it. Which was a relief because navigating Eliza’s reaction required my full attention.
“That sounds super high-risk. Shouldn’t you have backup? Why aren’t we coming with you?” she rapid-fired, the skin between her brows puckering more with each question. The fact that she was so eager to help, dangers be damned, plucked at my heartstrings. Maybe I wasn’t doing half-bad as a mentor. I grinned and squeezed her shoulder.
“I’m sure I’ll have backup—of some sort.” Bub’s winged spies were stealthier these days, but after the events of the previous evening, I had no doubt a fly had hitched a ride over from Tartarus. But I wouldn’t out my guardian demon just yet. “Jenni can’t afford to pull three reapers off the job right now, at least not on such short notice. I’ll be careful,” I added as Eliza’s hand pressed over mine, pinning it to her arm in a tender gesture.
“We’ll work fast today,” she insisted. “If we get through the harvests early, you know you can count on us to help.”
Kevin nodded in agreement and waved his digital docket at me. “These morgue and funeral home pickups will be a breeze. The rest shouldn’t be too bad, but I’ll put the helljacks to work and speed things along.”
“You two are the best.” I toasted them with my coffee before polishing it off and then glanced at my watch. We were well ahead of schedule. I just hoped we could keep it that way.
Kevin’s note about bringing the helljacks made me long for my hounds. But they were at Hades’ Hound House this morning, getting the stink scrubbed off. They’d be back to work soon enough.
I left my apprentices to finish their coffee and headed down to the dock, where I coined off to my first job of the day.
Harvesting souls in the Free World made my job a real grab bag. Don’t get me wrong—democracy and tolerance were great and all, but back when kings imposed their religious views on the general populace, it wasn’t unusual to end up with a docket full of souls bound for one of three simple destinations: a single paradise, a single underworld, or the Sea of Eternity.
Nowadays, I could collect a Buddhist from a cancer wing, hop a city over and grab a Wiccan from a house fire, then walk three blocks to pick up a Christian at a graveside service. I didn’t mind the variety of harvests, but the delivery to a dozen different afterlives pushed my workdays into overtime.
As much as I’d resisted having an apprentice, I had to admit that letting Kevin and Eliza take over delivery duties now and then was a welcome perk. Today, it was a necessary one.
I spent the better half of my morning in Toronto and New York, collecting souls fresh from their deathbeds—or crime scenes. Medium-risk generally meant a fifty-fifty chance they’d evacuate their bodies without reaper intervention. The timing was more precise than the laid-back, low-risk harvests I preferred, but the pay was better.
My last stop was an interstate crash site in the Midwest, where a whitetail buck had jumped in front of a church bus. There might have been more survivors if the driver hadn’t swerved into oncoming traffic. It made for an easy pickup, anyway. And at least one soul’s Off-Broadway dreams were about to come true since they were determined to perform their traveling Christmas pageant for a heavenly audience.
I shepherded the cluster of Heaven-bound souls back to Limbo City and down into the hold of the ship, setting them up with board games and Bibles before locking up the hatch. It would be a few hours until the rest of the day’s catch joined them, and my apprentices set sail for the afterlives.
I went ahead and traded my work robe for my leather jacket and headed into the city. Looking the part of Death just didn’t seem like the best idea while encountering souls that could potentially see me. I didn’t feel like running down my marks today.
With the lunch rush an hour off, the harbor was quiet. A few dryads unloaded a merchant ship, and a nephilim guard used his spear to shoo away a stork as it poked its head inside the travel booth near the dock entrance. Market Street was livelier. The vendors busied themselves tidying and restocking their tables in preparation for the next wave of patrons.
My handful of harvests had kept me on my toes, and I was already running late. So, I stood in line at the travel booth, taking my turn after a cherub with a broken harp tucked under one arm and a briefcase in his other hand. I hated to waste the coin, but shaving five blocks off my trip meant avoiding a lecture from Jenni for being tardy.
The booth spat me out on a corner between the Reaper Academy and Reapers Inc. I crossed the street and entered the building, trying to ignore the sweat coating my palms.
Jenni’s message had been vague, simply requesting that I report to her office after the council meeting. She hadn’t mentioned who else would be present, but I had a feeling I wouldn’t be going out to collect such precious cargo without some sort of supervision.
Of all the people I dreaded running into, I hadn’t expected to find Ellen waiting for me in the lobby. Dark bags hung under her eyes, and her curls were a frizzy mess—which was extra alarming considering her usual high level of maintenance.
“I really thought she already knew,” Ellen blurted as soon as she noticed me. My teeth clenched involuntarily, but I refrained from making a scene and headed for the elevators.
Ellen followed, wringing her hands as she blubbered. “I... I wanted to apologize in person.”
I ignored her and punched the button to call an elevator. This wasn’t the time or place.
“It’s just that Ross is under so much pressure, and the Guard is really struggling to keep up with all the hellcat reports. He thinks the only way to secure the borders is to restore the throne—”
“I’m not restoring the throne,” I finally interjected. An elevator pinged, the triangular light above its doors lighting as it began to open.
“Why not?” Ellen snapped, dropping her repentant façade. “Because a handful of nonbelievers think you’re something special?”
“Do they now?” I spared her a sideways glance as I waited for the elevator to empty. The lobby was by no means full, but it was crowded enough that Ellen’s tone had garnered a few curious stares. The attention seemed to embolden her.
“What have those souls ever actually done for you? Stop being so damn selfish, Lana.”
“Wow.” I shook my head and stepped inside the elevator, turning to face her as I pressed the button for the seventy-fifth floor. “Thanks for the in-person apology. I’m touched. Really.” I placed a hand over my heart as the doors closed, leaving Ellen to sort out her guilt and fury on her own.