Black flickered at the corners of her vision. Bright light raced past, obscuring shapes and memory. Then the sound battered her, a scream from both people and metal as something exploded. Chaos tore apart all reason and took her down with it.
Thrown adrift in a world of tumbled meaning and sensations, she became suddenly nameless. The roar of it all broke through her. She snapped like a thin piece of metal. The howl she let out joined the madness of her existence. She only did so to make something real. It was at least a word rather than a guttural sound that she let out. “No!” It stretched away, disjointed and lost, a demand that the universe wouldn’t meet.
Torn and battered, she didn’t look away or turn off any of her reactions. She plummeted from everywhere, spinning and misplaced.
After a numberless measure of time, the relentless rumble faded away. She tried to find herself. Raising her hands, she discovered she was trapped. Her body rattled in a cage of darkness as claustrophobia stole her from confusion’s grasp. Her no trembled and ground down into a please.
It didn’t matter. She longed for the comfort of the rumble, because the thick silence she’d been dropped into was even more terrifying. The blessing of unconsciousness was not hers to have.
The only feeling was her hands against metal, and the drip of her blood down her leg. That was a sensation she latched onto. At some point she couldn’t recall, she’d been injured. Shouldn’t she be experiencing pain? It must be shock. This all must be shock.
Wriggling her hand, she managed to get her fingers across her belly. The blood leaked under her palm, and fresh panic bloomed.
Die. I’m going to die in this box.
She didn’t even recognize what the box was, or how she’d gotten into it. Only the primitive part of her brain still fought to live. These questions would never find answers.
Don’t die. Breathe. Hold on.
The darkness at the corners of her vision pulled closer almost gently, compared to last time. If death was coming, it was kind. She’d wouldn’t welcome it, but maybe its compassion was better than panic.
Her forehead connected with the surface of the box, and reason unraveled. Darkness pooled and took her away. The stickiness on her fingers was the last sensation for a long time.
Lost and quiet, without sound or thought, she faded into the darkness. Coming apart seemed like the best thing to do. She hovered on the edge.
Then something pulled her back: the sensation of moving. Her body touched the surface of the box again, but after how long was impossible to calculate. Consciousness flickered to life inside her, slowly at first, then growing stronger and more demanding.
Sound entered and broke the quiet. The rattle of something against the box—metallic, perhaps? She didn’t want to return. Darkness seemed like the better option. It would take very little for her to spiral into there forever.
A voice—not hers, but familiar—echoed in her skull.
You don’t give up. You hear me? Keep going until you can’t anymore. That’s our way.
Gravity took hold. She slumped down into the box, feet connecting with the surface she’d almost forgotten was down there. Pain reminded her it still existed, too. The box fell over and rolled onto its side, taking her with it. She banged her head as it went horizontal, so she couldn’t be in space anymore.
That concept led to other things.
Spaceships. Planets. Soldiers.
Her brow furrowed at that last one. Where did it come from? She would’ve liked to have followed the thought, but there were more pressing matters. More grinding and grating noises as her box dragged along a surface. Was this a planet? No, a ship. Must be.
Voices came from outside, and she went still. Life existed beyond the box. It did before, too, but hopefully this life was not dangerous.
When she tried to take hold of them, her thoughts escaped her grasp like scattered particles. New ones formed in her mind and then evaporated. It must be something to do with her injury.
Light burst in through a glass panel in the box. Through her closed eyes, the intrusion hurt. Fear welled up, and she remained still. Had those unknown horrors found her?
The light departed, and she worked her mouth, testing whether it functioned enough for words. It did not. A lot of things were fuzzy and hard to grasp. She waited for eventual death, or whatever the box’s fate was. Machinery stuttered to life. Cool air covered her face, and it seemed… good.
Lights blinked: blue, white, and back to blue. A loud clank, and the box opened.
Keeping her eyes shut, she waited for the next box, or a descent to chaos.
“I think she’s okay. Bit banged up.” The voice was discordant after so much silence, breaking against her ears like something sharp.
“Shit, ‘bit banged up’? Look at the blood.”
Hands touched hers. They were warm and shocked her enough to jerk upright.
“What the fuck?”
Her eyes ached when she opened them, and she only made out shapes moving against the harsh white. The person she startled fell backwards, and then came a rattle of metal. He must have fallen.
“Hey, hey, you’re okay.” Another voice, less painful to her ears, reached her. She worked her head back and forth, trying to locate the person. Her mouth seemed to belong to someone else.
“Take it easy. We’ve got you.”
The first person, a larger shape in her vision, got back up. “Lenny, get away from her. Why is she even awake? The pod shouldn’t have popped her out like a damn ice cube.”
“She can hear us, I think.” Hands took hold of hers again. “Let me see your injury, there.”
“Great, she died of shock.” The voice didn’t seem like it was making a joke. Hard to tell, though.
“Shut up!” The hands moved over her belly. “Looks like the pod’s trauma kit has done a pretty good job. She’s just got a semi-healed cut here.” A hand locked on her shoulder, helping her focus on the person’s face for the first time.
He was young, with dark skin and green eyes. This one was called Lenny. Was he kind, or a killer? Either way, she was in no condition to get away from him. Her eyes were finally focusing properly, though.
“She got any freezer burn?” The second man appeared behind Lenny’s shoulder. He was young as well, but with long, green hair. “Damn she’s tall, but looks kinda out of it.”
Lenny shot him an annoyed look before leaning in closer to her. “I’m Lenny Pope, that’s my brother, Morgan. You’re safe here, but this escape pod is shutting down, so we have to get you out real quick.”
Panic surged through her; did she even understand how to make her limbs work? Sitting up seemed like the most she could manage. The man who called himself Lenny Pope slipped his arm around her shoulders and, with a slight grunt, levered her out. His muscles bunched as he pulled her upright. He was surprisingly strong.
Unable to do anything else, she leaned against him. His brother didn’t move to help at first, but then when Lenny let out another grunt, he darted forward to help her on the other side.
She blinked, gradually acclimatizing to the light, and looked around. Her mouth was dry, but she croaked out, “What ship is this?”
The brothers helped her over to a corner and propped her up on a coil of steel rope. She clutched it as if it might save her.
Morgan glanced at his brother. “You’re on the Eumenides. We’re a family hauler, nothing fancy. What about you? Got a name? What ship were you on?”
“Give her a chance. That pod is banged up too, so she might have some freezer burn in here.” Lenny tapped the side of his head. Then he pulled a bottle from his pants pocket and, unscrewing it, handed it to her.
She sniffed it. Water. She sipped enough to moisten her lips. Only then did she take a chance on more words. “Nothing.”
She held out her hands and examined her arms. The clothing was dark blue camouflage, but unfortunately did not have a name tag sewn on it. That would have been convenient. The flex and play of strong muscles beneath the clothing meant nothing to someone who didn’t even recognize her own body.
Morgan let out a long groan and kicked a piece of debris they must have dragged in with the pod.
“You’re worried the about salvage rights?” She squinted up at them, trying to focus her eyes.
The brothers stared at each other for a second.
“Are you fucking with us?” Morgan took a step back. “You can’t say where you came from, what happened, or your name, but you know about salvage rights?”
That was strange. She pressed her hand to her forehead, as if she could force the connections to come together. Her thoughts darted about, unconnected and random. Trajectories for space travel. A recipe for cornbread. The smile of a little girl in a space station. A monster in the dark. Her arm hurt.
“Hey, don’t listen to him. Freezer burn works like that sometimes. Don’t push it.”
She studied his face. Kindness, she could recognize that.
“So no salvage, then?” A woman climbed down the ladder from above and carefully scanned the situation. Her likeness was reflected in the brothers. Their mother. She experienced a twinge of sadness out of nowhere.
“I can sign away my rights,” she said. “Get me to the nearest station and I’ll do it.”
The older woman dropped the last few feet and stalked over. “Not going to lie. I’d appreciate it.” She held out her hand. “Daniella Pope.”
She placed her hand in Daniella’s and shook, though she did not know where her knowledge of the act came from. “We have an agreement.”
“Not if she can’t remember her damn name.” Morgan leaned against the far wall and crossed his arms.
“Then we’ll have to help her find out,” Daniella said. “We’re near a moon, so for now, how about we go with Callisto? My grandmother was born there.”
She blinked. It wasn’t familiar, but it didn’t feel either right or wrong. Still, it gave her rescuers something to call her. However, certainty stirred in her. She could not attach it to any memory, but a name bubbled up inside her.
“No, not Callisto,” she said in a whisper. “My name is Mae.”
Daniella nodded. “Alright, that’s something. Mae, then.” She scanned the hold. “Let’s leave the enumeration of all this until later. Boys, get Mae here up top.”
Her two sons assisted their find up the ladder to the living quarters of the ship. It was a small vessel, civilian, and probably running on a tight budget. Mae’s thoughts ran about so much that she couldn’t catch them. How did she not know how she ended up in the pod, and yet she could assess this ship instantly?
Mae’s feet started working, and she managed to stand on her own.
“Down here,” Daniella said, guiding the newcomer to a small bench where dining must usually happen.
Mae took a seat.
An older man popped his head in. Again, she recognized physical similarities with the brothers. So he was the father, then. The way his eyes scanned over her and his family, before a welcoming smile spread across his lips, suggested he was former military.
“Didn’t expect guests, but welcome to the Eumenides.”
Daniella opened a medicine kit. “Sorry, not much in the way of supplies on board.” She unraveled the sensors on an ancient-looking diagnostic pad.
Mae physically recoiled. “I can’t… after all that.” She gestured down towards the cargo hold as her voice trailed off.
Lenny waved his mother away. “Mom, there isn’t anything that broken kit can tell you. We need to get her back to the station.”
The parents shared a glance. Mae could almost see the mathematic calculations flying between them. Air, water, and fuel were expensive, and small outfits like this always existed on the knife-edge of possibility. However, the laws of rescue still stood.
She shook her head. Again, how did she know that?
Daniella put away the pad but insisted on cleaning their new arrival. She shooed the men out of the kitchen area and closed the door.
“Sorry, the showers here aren’t full water, like in a bigger ship, but the steam will make you cleaner at least.” She bustled around opening panels, and in short order she’d pushed the bench and table into the floor and extended a clear half-wall. Then from the hull she opened another four compartments and pulled out a steam shower head. The Eumenides might not be big, but she was versatile.
The older woman sighed. “I remember showering without a care at my grandfather’s house. Lots of water on Cuélebre. You could stand in there all day. Sorry, the steam shower is much too quick.”
The two women stared at each other for an awkward amount of time.
Daniella cleared her throat. “You’re going to need to take off your clothes.”
Mae stripped down and stood under the steam heads. When they turned on, she nearly jumped out. The sudden application of a sensation she’d never experienced before was a shock to the system. The heads delivered a cleansing agent and then a last blast of warmth to clean the rest of her body off. When she was done, Daniella handed her a towel and some clean clothes.
“Thank you,” Mae said as she dried herself carefully. She tried not to stare at her own brown skin and limbs. They did not seem familiar, and that was terrifying. How could she not know her own body?
“The overalls are mine,” Daniella said, once Mae was in them. “They should last you until we get back to Guelph.” Her hand clasped Mae’s, demanding her attention. Now, when she met the woman’s eyes, they shifted from kindly to probing.
“Do you know if you’re endangering us?”
This woman had military training, too. Mae recognized it in her posture and concern. She knew she should have lied, but she couldn’t. The only option now was to tell these people the truth–whatever bit of it she had hold of.
Mae shook her head while she tied back her hair. Talking helped take her mind off the strangeness of her body and her existence. “I don’t know that either. I’m sorry. I wish I could tell you.”
A muscle tightened in Daniella’s jaw. She scooped up Mae’s discarded clothes. “Maybe there are some clues here or in the debris.” She looked Mae up and down. “I’m going to go talk to my family. Please stay here.”
Daniella spun around and shut the door behind her. Mae activated the bench from the floor and sat back down, her feelings in turmoil. This still didn’t feel real, mainly because she didn’t even seem real to herself. She stared down at her hands and tried to imagine what she’d done in the moments before entering the pod. Did she climb in, or did someone put her there?
Right now, was there someone out in the dark, missing her and wondering whether she was alive? Mae would have dearly loved to summon up their face, but every time she reached for it, she found nothing but emptiness. It was as if she were a part of the void of space itself. Her eyes fluttered, and the darkness reached out again.