The ship screamed as the blast tore her apart. Panic flooded Mae, but not for herself—for the crew. A woman cried out in rage. Mae echoed that outrage. A primitive wail ripped up her throat.
“Hey! Hey, are you alright?”
Mae thrashed as hands grabbed hold of her. Escape or fight were her only options.
“Mae! You’re safe. Calm down.”
The voice wasn’t angry or afraid; it was unperturbed. Something about it reached down into her brain and disconnected her from the nightmare she’d fallen into.
Mae opened her eyes to find Lenny leaning over her, holding her hands in his. Her breathing hitched as she jerked away from his touch. Attachment to others was dangerous. How she knew, she couldn’t say. This was like the other dreams, foggy and hard to hold on to. Even as she tried to recall the dream, the details evaporated. Frustration welled inside Mae.
She pushed herself up from the bench but didn’t meet his eyes. “I’m… I’m sorry. I guess I drifted back to sleep.”
“You’ve slept enough.” Lenny shrugged, attempting to make light of it.
Daniella Pope leaned against the doorway to the galley, eyes raking over this newcomer to her home. “I jerked you out of stasis pretty quick. We have emergency adrafinil shots in our medical kit for that. Can make you a bit shaky, but if you want it—”
Mae struggled to her feet and held up a hand. The idea of a shot worked like a jolt of caffeine. “No, no shots, thanks. I’ll be alright.”
Daniella gave a slow nod, but Mae understood her expression. Like most mothers, she was cautious about those she let close to her family. Mae could only respect that.
Shit, parents. Mae didn’t even know if somewhere out there, she had a father or a mother worrying about her. Hell, she might even have a partner and children of her own. She should know these things. She was embarrassed that she didn’t. People would judge her if she didn’t figure it out. How could she not have this basic information?
“Mom, don’t you have some navigation to do?” Lenny jerked his head back towards the cockpit.
Daniella pressed her lips together before answering. “Your dad’s got the helm.”
After the initial shock of finding a person in the debris cloud wore off, she had become more calculating and suspicious of Mae.
“I’ve been thinking if there is some way to thank you all for what you’ve done for me.” Mae cleared her throat. “As agreed, I’m going to sign over salvage rights when we reach Guelph.”
“No one wanted to bring it up, just in case… you know… freezer burn does strange things to the mind.” Lenny grinned nervously, and glanced across at his mother. Her expression didn’t change. “That’s great, right, Mom?”
The lines between Daniella Pope’s brows tightened into a frown. “Yeah, Lenny, real great. Except for the fact she can’t even remember what happened to her, or what ship this debris even came from. Kinda important if you want to sign anything.”
“Oh. I didn’t think of that.” Mae’s cheeks grew hot. She’d tried to offer a solution and now she’d only revealed what an idiot she was.
“Shit, Mom. She just came out of a deep freeze. Give her a break.”
“I’m trying. I’m really trying.” Daniella glanced at her wrist-pd and scrolled through lines of data. The small square of glass allowed her to access all the information from her ship. “Some good news. Looks like we’re going to make Guelph in three days, just before our oxygen runs out. Your brothers plotted a nice slingshot around the planet Duendes. So we won’t suffocate. Which is nice.”
Mae searched for something positive or amusing to say, but the words died in her mouth. Daniella spun away and stomped back towards the cockpit.
It all made Mae feel guilty for surviving—which was ridiculous.
“Hey,” Lenny said, squeezing her shoulder, “don’t worry about Mom. She’s always counting units. Oxygen, water, and coffee. Makes her prickly sometimes, but she wouldn’t have wanted you to keep floating by.”
Mae resolved to avoid Daniella as much as possible. Her fierce protectiveness suggested that she would prioritize her family’s safety, even if it meant putting their new arrival in danger.
The next three days settled into a restricted but manageable monotony.
Lenny took charge of spending time with Mae, while the rest of his family kept busy elsewhere. He also cooked and provided coffee for Daniella, Morgan, and the father, William. It meant that Mae could keep herself tucked away in the canteen and stare out the small window.
Lenny would come sit with her and try to explain what part of space they were in, and the various qualities and history of the planets in the system. It didn’t take more than a day for that vein of conversation to run dry.
After the planets, Lenny moved on to their destination, Guelph Station. Mae guessed he was attempting to make it sound more interesting than it actually was by how often he referred to the magnificent views from the observation deck. It was a station far from the prosperous corners of the galaxy, Lenny admitted that much.
He eventually gave up trying to make it seem more interesting, and by the third and final day, he’d resorted to teaching Mae card games and tricks, which he called ‘magic’. Not willing to insult the one kind person on the ship, Mae did not correct him on that score.
Instead, she nodded and smiled as he tried to teach her ancient Earth games. He seemed to have a weak grasp of the rules, and a poor memory of the names of the games, too. While he chatted on, Mae concentrated on attempting to figure her way through to her own memories. Shards of recollection spun around her. A ship burning through space. A woman’s curly dark hair clinging to her forehead over frightened eyes. A moon looming dangerously close. None of that meant anything: all she hung her existence on was the name Mae.
Without memories, what was she? A broken, unprepared human in a world that even Lenny described as harsh. People needed connection to others. The idea of people Mae didn’t remember out there in the endless dark, searching for her, missing her, made sleep impossible.
Finally, she understood that these distractions of Lenny’s were not doing her any favors.
She took hold of his hand and stopped it from laying out another row of cards. He froze, and Mae, examining his strange expression, jerked her hands back.
“I appreciate what you’re trying to do,” she said with a smile, “but I need more. You’ve told me about the station itself, but what about the rest of the galaxy? The companies and governments that move everything around. I need to know about them, too.”
Lenny held Mae’s gaze for a moment, and she read reluctance there.
“It’s alright. I need to have information about the world—good and bad. You won’t break me with the truth.”
He glanced out the window again. “I don’t want to lie, but you’re right, you need everything. Guelph is a Jùtóu Combine station and is located in UPP space.”
When Mae tapped the side of her head to remind him, he let out a short, awkward laugh.
“Oh shit, yeah, sorry. The Combine is a company, a pretty big deal. Makes everything you can think of. The UPP is the Union of Progressive Peoples. They’re a federation, started in ’08. Based on Earth, but they’ve got colonies like New Kiev, Xiang—”
“Damn, little brother, you really listened during all those lessons.” Morgan grinned as he tied his hair up. A sure sign he meant business. “Never would have guessed that shit would actually be useful?”
“She asked, alright?”
His brother rolled his eyes. “All you need to know about the Combine and the UPP is that they grind down people like us. We have to live in their world. So if you suddenly remember you’re a wealthy princess, you’ll want to jet out of Guelph straight away. If not, well, then you better discover some skills pronto.”
Mae frowned at that. She understood her precarious position, but Morgan hadn’t exactly put it in the kindest of terms. Without any clue who she was, how would she operate in this world? Mae might have forgotten her past, but she could still somehow recall the concept of capitalism.
Lenny didn’t deny anything his brother blurted out. Instead, he opened a drawer and slid a disc across the table to Mae.
“It’s a lesson for kids on the history of space, the powers, and importantly, the companies. Guelph isn’t important enough to be in it, but it will give you an idea of what we all deal with. Play it on the canteen display.”
Mae nodded and took the data drive. When the brothers retreated, she slid it into the slot under the small screen opposite her seat. Her life depended on taking in as much information as possible. Huddled in the canteen, Mae absorbed all she could about the Earth governments, their reach, and aspirations from the past. However, she found that it contained limited information about the corporations.
It mentioned Weyland-Yutani, the Jùtóu Combine, and Seegson, along with their governments and home systems. The disc did not go into any real detail beyond that, and something pricked the back of Mae’s mind that it was important she noticed this.
She subsisted on coffee and stims, forcing her body to comply. By the time Guelph Station came into view through the Eumenides’ porthole, Mae had devoured all the knowledge on the data drive. Hopefully she’d absorbed enough from it to find her feet a little quicker.
Staring out at Guelph Station, she observed its three decks stacked beneath a simple, circular shape.
“Yeah, doesn’t look like much, does it?” Lenny appeared at the canteen doorway, his expression sour.
“I thought you’d be glad to be off the Eumenides?”
He shrugged. “I don’t know how I should feel about station or ship.”
It surprised her that he didn’t lower his voice any; after all, this ship was his family home. She calculated that her arrival gave him an excuse to be more open.
She gestured to the bench next to her. He took the offer, and they sat together as the Eumenides waited for its turn to dock. Mae got a good, panoramic look at the station, and Lenny acted as her guide to the ships in port.
He recognized all of them. His knowledge was even greater than the disc he’d given her.
“Mining vessels,” he said, bouncing an empty coffee cup from hand to hand. “They’re all old and beat up. Nothing really interesting visits Guelph.” His lips quirked up. “Apart from you, that is.”
He meant it as a joke, but Mae turned away. She wanted to tell him she wasn’t interesting at all. That, in fact, she wanted to be insignificant, if possible. However, she didn’t deny that her inability to remember would make her an object of interest.
Lenny touched the back of her hand lightly. “I’m sorry. Look, we’ll all help you get on your feet. Mom said we won’t even report the debris until you’ve figured out who you are. We’ll keep it off the records for now.”
William Pope popped his head around the corner of the door. “Hey, Lenny, your mom wants you up front to—ah—help with docking.”
Lenny let out a tortured sigh and got to his feet. “I’ll be back once we’re parked. Try to enjoy the view.”
He followed his father down the corridor and left Mae alone with the window.
His conversation was meant to calm her, but once Lenny left, the effect evaporated. As the station grew closer and closer, panic built inside Mae. Part of her wanted to rush to the airlock and throw herself out. This self-destructive thought she didn’t give voice to.
Instead, as she watched, hugging her knees, the dark dreams that lingered inside her took over. Lenny and the Eumenides faded away until she was on another, quite different vessel.