Tuesday, January 28
Sounds of a child’s laughter came from a bedchamber at Cecil House. Awdrey sat on the floor, rolling glass beads to Mildred across a sloping board. “Eighteen!” exclaimed Mildred, delighted. “Eighteen,” echoed her mother, smiling. Sunlight made the bead sparkle as it rolled. “Nineteen…twenty!”
“Well done,” said Awdrey encouragingly. “Now, if you were to roll half of all those beads back to me, how many would you have left?”
“Six!” guessed Mildred.
“No, no, think,” said Awdrey. “Divide them into two groups.”
There was a knock at the door. One of Cecil’s ushers entered with a young maidservant, whom Awdrey recognized as a woman called Elizabeth. He bowed. “Madam, your husband is here to see you. And my mistress craves the companionship of her goddaughter in the chapel.”
Awdrey turned to Mildred. “Will you be very good for Lady Cecil, and go with Elizabeth?”
The little girl nodded gravely and got to her feet to join the maidservant, who held her hand out to her, smiling. The usher withdrew. Clarenceux stepped slowly into the room. He bowed to her formally, then came closer and kissed her.
“We have found the way by which those women entered the house,” he said. “They came through a hole in the back attic. It was covered with a hide.”
“How did you find it?”
“With difficulty. How is Annie?”
“Improving. She has been up and about—although she is still not well enough to move from her room. Tell me more about the attic.”
“I met a young lad in a tavern. I do not know him at all and yet I have the feeling I know him very well. He has a gift for divining things—so much so that he has clearly enraged several men in his time who have cut his face for using his skills to defeat them in card games. I used to have something of a similar gift, when I was his age. Mine was nothing like as marked as his, but I understand what it is to sense the truth. He found the concealed entrance.”
“Does this boy have a name?”
“Fyndern Catesby.”
“And? Is there a sign of the women?”
“No. When we investigated their chamber, there were three beds. Two were abandoned. The third woman had recently fled.”
Awdrey bent down and started to pick up the glass beads that Mildred had left scattered on the floor, replacing them in a small box.
“I miss you,” she said suddenly, without meaning to say what she was thinking.
Clarenceux joined her in bending down to pick up the beads, popping a couple in the box. “Do you remember when we were courting? I would visit your father’s house and bow so respectfully, and quote chapters from the Bible—all the time trying to stop myself from imagining you naked.” He paused, rolling a bead between his fingers.
She smiled and playfully punched his arm.
He smiled back, and then said, “I miss you too. But now, after everything that has happened, I yearn for a different form of satisfaction, one far greater than mere happiness.”
She put her hand on his arm. “You will find it. I have faith in you. I don’t believe anyone will ever be able to stop you doing what you want, or at least what you feel is right.”
They spoke together for another half an hour about the children, and the dark clouds of doubt momentarily parted to allow gleams of hope to touch them. They went to see Annie in her chamber overlooking the garden. Briefly Clarenceux saw Lady Cecil, her young son Robert, and his daughter Mildred after they had concluded their chapel attendance. Then it was time for him to go. He embraced little Mildred and playfully flicked a lock of her hair, which made her giggle. Lady Cecil considerately took the children away, leaving him to say good-bye to Awdrey alone.
“I will call again on Thursday,” he said, putting his cloak over his shoulders. “Tomorrow I have to confront Dethick and agree with him about this visitation of Oxfordshire. I don’t think I can put it off any longer—not without him threatening to summon me to answer to the Earl Marshal. But we shall see.” He came close and put a hand to her cheek. “Your skin is so soft.” He embraced her and kissed her.
Awdrey watched him walk away into the cold damp air of the courtyard. Now she could see that she truly was his Pole Star. His hopes were guided by her existence. She quietly answered questions for him that he did not even think to ask. She steadied him, comforted him, just through merely being part of his life.