27THE BOOK OF CHURL

I

Churl stamps through the swamp.

Wet scowl, muddy shins, leather

sandals chafing. Bile. He eyes the shaggy

blacksmith’s wife but she will not,

will not have him. So he stomps back

to the kine, who are kin, lowering

at him in the rain where grumble is

how they hold together happily,

humping and forgetting.

Churl remembers every

curse and kick that sent him

on his way to this outskirts hut

where even his damp fire

wants to smoke him out.

He nurses it, and in his breast

a charred ember grows arms

and legs and fingers that reach

for a length of rope then

tie the knot of reason

to twist it round the nearest throat.

28II

Face it, Churl, the world’s

too big for you. Your piecemeal picture

leaves out most of it without a hint

there’s something missing.

Books could be bound

and shelved on the moon

for all you’ll ever get to know

of them. The velvet-antlered life

of courtiers and kings likewise

plays out on other planets.

This corner, though —

grey light on the thatch,

scruffy ponies tender-lipping

thin spring grass, the rope

and hammer and the swing

of a rough skirt as it passes with

a clutch of flax — is your store

of wisdom. What’s known so well

time will dismiss, but you’ve

passed that test already:

your bones will some day learn

the lick of earth’s tongue here

you’ll be the painless master of

a fertile grammar.

29III

Churl barely owns a coat, much less

a coat of arms, but let’s be generous

and pretend: make him king for a day

of all the animal world and ask

which beast is his emblem?

Not the beautiful: otter, peregrine

or lynx. Not the warrior caste:

the devils and tigers of distant islands

outclass him. Nor the plated aardvark

or rhinoceros — too impervious

and, in any case, their tragic

date with history comes later.

Not cool as an eel, nor brittle-shiny

as a beetle. Not one of the flock nor

owning, in his onliness, the splendour

of the albatross. What then, what?

More apt might be the camel

but hold on, best stay real now: haul

your flimmering kites of fancy back

to village dirt and just say

donkey: stubborn-shanked,

morose and bony.

Each passing horse looks

down his nose but Churl

outlasts — endures, resists —

30the sticks that thresh his hide

until the fleas jump from

the strakes of his ribs,

puts head down

and walks on.

31IV Kilter

When they came through on hooves

and horseflesh looking for a fight

they knocked him over like a chair,

back-flattened, legs in air. And

like a wooden chair, he couldn’t

right himself. Already they’d galloped on,

having hardly seen him. From

that day Churl was always (after someone

running stopped to set him on his feet

then sped to check the children)

just a little wrong, crooked inside

himself, as if the topsy-turvy had dislodged

a part that didn’t matter much at first

but slowly became sore point, weak point,

point where all his leverage leaked

into the earth, everything vice versa.

32V

It was a day for the black bile.

Everything tasted metal.

Fire wouldn’t catch.

Rain wouldn’t go.

A day to huddle

in the hut’s near dark

counting grudges

counting crows.

Rats rustled

in the thatch

of his thoughts.

Nothing for it but the flask

to light the ache and make it

glow.

33VI

But today they want him for a game

of soldiers. He takes the iron carapace

for makeshift home, and shield

and spear outline his ordinary

soul so the world can see and be

afear’d. Gruff and surly still,

a skittle swelled with purpose,

for once he has a place

in someone else’s plan.

It comforts him.

He keeps a fragile peace.

34VII

Stop yer lookin, she says

as she sweeps by with a bundle

of bony-fingered sticks for a besom.

Ye’ve no got the pockets

and besides he’d break yer silly head.

Churl knows it’s true but can’t

blink out her hipsway,

her everyday trudge past his hovel

to water, to market, for faggots.

At night when a moony finger

pries through the straw to touch

him where it hurts, he opens

one eye. Stop yer lookin

he mutters to her callous cousin

the lidless watcher in the sky.

35VIII Black Monday

Black pudding

Black pot

Black cherry

Black rot

Black rust

Black looks

Black list

Black books

Black ice

Black salt

Blackthorn

Black wort

Black art

Black oats

Black scab

Black soap

Black sheep

Black rat

Black cattle

Black cat

Black bile

Black mark

Blackmail

Black work

36Black magic

Black jack

Black joke

Bone black

Black medick

Black clock

Black monk

Black watch

Black vomit

Black breath

Black-souled

Black death

Black-plumed

Black-clad

Black earth

Pitch black

37IX

Of a frosty night he dreams

a white bear with black tongue

and black eyes walking

alone between ice-glitter and star-glimmer

following a black nose

to haul sealflesh from the sea

and find a white-furred female.

The black claws scritch the crystals.

The bear will not be turned

from his yearly purpose.

Churl’s never been that far

north, still it’s a memory or message,

though, this dream, no mere

aurora in his head. He knows it

in his bones and blood. Wakes

underneath the skins to snowlight

turns over while the dream retreats

on black-padded feet to the hissing

of blades on a sled.

38X

Chewing. Crunching. Gnawing.

Spitting. Belching. Sitting

as the fire burns down he thinks

of the birds in the fields

not yet become a meal

for ham-fisted gods like him.

The pheasant with his barred

tail and choke-note.

Finches flocking red-gold out

of the wheat when pots are beaten,

and how the cast

net of them whirls and drops

over the tree

where they resettle on alert

for the moment when the little gods

of the crops are eyeing other enemies. And once,

the weird, slicing hum of a swan-pair

rowing air above the river-road

towards the grand estate where none

but royalty will have them

on its plate. He stuck a dropped

pinion in his thatch that day.

The silken-hooked white flame

still burning from the hollow shaft

catches his eye on nights when,

belly full, the mind is free to wander.

He wouldn’t eat that, though it writes

his hunger.

39XI Dark horse

The only horse he owns and rides

is chalk-white on the green hill.

Is a constellation, a wheel

and snort of stars

earth-stabled in daytime

turned loose at night

after the moon stops

watching. Churl crouches

low against the winds

and grips a fist of mane

but knows that nothing will

unseat him. He comes

from a long line

of starblazers, horsemakers.

Against all earthly proof

he holds it to be true.

The few who look close

get a glimpse of it

in the roll and glitter

of his eye.

40XII

When Churl was born he slipped out

like a foal in a cloudy caul.

A few rough licks from his mother’s

tongue, then she told him

to get on with it, died not long after

in breach of a brother.

The way it’s been ever since,

early calluses getting harder.

41XIII

There he is, cleaning his ear out

with his finger, wiping grease

on his breeks, tossing the bones.

He knows what’s said against him

but stocks up against coming

hunger, sucking on stones.

42XIV

Some nights he goes across the field

to stand like a battered tankard on

a hillock. Overlooks the wheat, the

woods, the waning sun. Knows,

for a moment, that none of this is his and

all is. That’s beyond the ken

of some who think they run the world.

Nights like those, he’ll settle with the sun.

43XV

If he were a hero, something

would happen now. Instead, he lives

a long unhappening. Unadventure,

unbirthdays, unrest. But Churl has

his admirers: the reeds and

finches flutter at his passing,

small children now and then

mistake his shaggy coat

for comfort and lean close, grabbing

a fistful of unintended warmth

nonetheless freely given and

with unexpected feeling.

44XVI

Still he looks to the glittering

bear in the sky, the horse

on the hill. They eye him back

out of black, out of green.

At night he tells himself

their stories, rides them

far into the world before they turn

and bring him breathless home.

He can wait for the night when

they just keep going

over the edge of the world

taking him far and forever beyond

what the blacksmiths and

elders, the midwives and

farmers know: it will be cold

out there, but he’ll be glad

to go.

45XVII

One night

out trapping

light up ahead —

small fire in the night-

woods, small figure hunched,

face hooded from the flame.

He creeps close

enough to see the skinny wrists

and know that he could overpower

this. He steps out

of the trees, cudgel-ready

and up she jumps

like a frightened jill

whose foot has felt the whisper

of the closing snare

but her hand holds

a knife, she stands

her ground.

46XVIII

Can’t cudgel this,

so has to talk it round —

but she won’t gentle so he

grabs at her wrists, gets

boxed for his trouble

feels the sting

of her blade then

cuffs and curses

drags an arm up her back

to settle it, takes a cord

from his belt to truss her.

Illicit game is what

he came for, but what

will he do with this

struggling creature,

still alive, and good

for neither food nor trade?

He sucks the cut

47on his forearm, retires

to the other side of

the campfire to eye her

and consider.

48XIX

She eyes him back.

His bird in her hand.

So he does what

she came for — spits

the bird, and when it’s done

untrusses her

hands over a half-share.

Straight after

she is flicker and

snuffed quickly by the dark

but he hears her rabbit-running

by the snap of twigs

and branches in her path

mind-eyes a white scut bobbing

until she’s far enough for breath,

unsheltered safety.

49XX

After, he’s always on the lookout.

A small beacon burns,

disturbs his rest.

Unfair. Nettled

by the fine hair on

her forearms.

50XXI

And then one day

she’s there —

in daylight, swinging

her catch in one hand

the other pushing back

a strand from her eyes,

pale blue, he now sees,

colour of glacier country

of a line that came

on the longships.

Must have been watching.

Strange to think of himself

as what she’s seen

with that thousand-mile stare

up close enough to judge

the tilt of his neck

the swing of his axe.

He’s game. Now lifts his head

to her scent on the breeze.

51XXII

There’ll be no song

for it — too soon for troubadours

and anyway in another country.

No vault to exalt the voice,

no scruffy bard to sing

what Churl, an ordinary pawn,

cannot. He’s outside poetry

at this time, it’s true, but

he knows a spell or two

and at a pinch could find

a ribbon to riddle her hair on

that rare day when she

is of a mind to care about

beguilement. He’ll leave it at

her door and let her guess

who brought it and what it was

he came for. (Whistling.)

52XXIII

A blackbird lives in the hedge.

A monster lives in the fen.

The poor forked creature

walks

and sometimes rides

the white horse up the hill

and down again.