I didn’t know how to handle seeing Tessa at college every day. When the corridors were crowded it was a little easier, but being in the same building, living in the same town, we inevitably crossed paths.
I should’ve gone to English, as Mrs Mitchell was going over some stuff we needed to know for our mock exams, but it was going to be even harder to concentrate now that Tessa knew I could see her. It was bad enough with her talking over the teacher, then shouting out answers only I could hear. I should’ve stolen her answers. It wasn’t like anyone would’ve known I was cheating.
And I so wasn’t in the mood to face her, so I skipped English and went to see Fadil instead. I had a free morning aside from English anyway.
‘Morning,’ said Fadil, stepping aside to let me in. He wiped at his red nose with the back of his hand, then snivelled.
‘Morning,’ I said with a sigh. I sat on my usual spot on the sofa, resting my head in my hands.
Fadil sat beside me, a look of concern on his new face. Even with a new face it was an expression of his I was all too familiar with. Was I really that pathetic?
‘What’s wrong?’
‘Am I that transparent?’ I asked.
‘Yes. What’s wrong?’
‘Are you OK? You seem snivelly.’
Yes, I was avoiding the question.
‘I have a cold, but I’ll be fine,’ he said with a big sniff. What was it with the people around me insisting they’d be fine lately? Had Mum’s attitude rubbed off on Fadil? ‘Back to you: what’s wrong?’
I shook my head. ‘Tessa found out I can see her. And now I’m hiding from her like a baby.’
‘You’re not being a baby. It’s a weird situation.’ He pursed his lips. ‘Can you stop twitching your leg, please? I feel like I’m in one of those vibrating chairs.’
‘Sorry. I didn’t know I was doing it.’ Oops. I must’ve been more on edge than I’d realised. It was a subconscious habit I saved for when I was really restless. ‘How do you know what a vibrating chair feels like?’
‘Ben ordered one from the internet. He returned it pretty quickly because it sounded like a jet engine.’
I laughed. ‘Ben ordered a massage chair?’
‘Why is that funny?’
‘Didn’t see him as that kind of person.’
Fadil shrugged. ‘I think it was a late-night impulse purchase to try to distract himself from his breakup with your mum.’
‘Oh.’
He nodded, pulling his navy dressing gown tighter around him. He looked really cold. And ill. They were his first modern germs, so I supposed they would hit him a lot harder as he didn’t really have an immune system yet.
I’d never thought about how their short breakup had affected Ben. Then again, I’d never really seen the impact on Mum, either. I’d been too busy getting brainwashed by Dominic. That had turned out well.
At least Ben had had the common sense to return the noisy chair when they’d both hated it. It showed how much he included Fadil as a part of his life now, too. It warmed my heart.
‘Let’s go do something,’ I said, standing up. ‘Once you’ve got another layer or two on.’
Fadil looked up at me. ‘Like what?’
I put my hand out. ‘I think it’s time we introduce you to the tram.’
*
‘I’m not sure this is a good idea,’ said Fadil, wrinkling his nose to try to stop himself from sneezing.
‘Relax, this is a quiet time of day,’ I informed him.
We sat on the tram, facing ahead, ready to visit the city centre. Fadil hadn’t left Hucknall since he’d been resurrected. If he’d still been using Mum’s powers to understand English, he wouldn’t have been able to since eight miles would’ve been too far away from her. But since he was using my powers now, it meant he could travel into town with me.
Going just after the school rush meant that hardly anyone else was on the tram. We practically had a carriage to ourselves. That would probably change as we got closer to town, but I doubted it. We’d definitely have our own square of four stripy blue chairs to ourselves. Even so, we chose to sit next to each other.
‘I’ll find a way to pay you back for my tram ticket,’ he said.
I squeezed his arm. ‘It’s fine, really. It’s only a few quid.’
‘But I don’t have any money! Or any way to earn it! I’m constantly sponging off Ben and I feel bad enough already.’ He lowered his head, staring into his lap.
I’d never really thought about that before. I took having money for granted. I knew Mum worried about it, but she was conscious to not pass that worry on to me. Not thinking about money was probably a bad habit to have given that I was now eighteen, but I’d deal with that another day.
‘How can I even get a job if I don’t have a proper ID?’ he asked as the tram pulled away.
‘You have Dominic’s,’ I said, although I doubted it’d offer him much reassurance. ‘Technically, you’re him now.’
Doc had found a way to adjust Dominic’s legal records and basically replace him with Fadil. It wasn’t an ideal solution, but it was all we could come up with at such short notice.
Fadil cringed. I didn’t really blame him. He was basically impersonating a power-hungry psychopath.
‘We’ll figure it out, it just takes time. There isn’t exactly a roadmap for this.’
He shook his head. ‘Yeah, you’re right. It’s just that every time I feel like I can do more, something else gets in the way.’ He snivelled, wiping at his nose with the back of his hand. ‘I want to carve out my own life, but it’s hard when my only chance of acceptance in the real world is pretending to be him.’ It was almost like Fadil couldn’t bring himself to say Dominic’s name, which was fair enough. He hadn’t exactly been a stellar person, although technically he hadn’t done anything to hurt Fadil directly.
In fact, Dominic had been the one to free Fadil from his sarcophagus and the blood curse that had incapacitated him…but only so that he could work out how to cast a blood curse on Maggie and Josh. He’d done a great thing to fuel a terrible thing.
I rubbed Fadil’s hand in what I hoped was a supportive way. Leaning in to his ear, I whispered, ‘There are cameras. Not sure if they can hear us, but maybe we should pretend you’re auditioning for a role, just in case?’ While I doubted they’d take us seriously, you could never be too careful. It was a quiet tram and a sensitive topic.
Fadil burst away from me, standing in the aisle of the tram and holding his arms out. ‘How dare you accuse me of being melodramatic! I’ll have you know I’m a terrific thespian.’
A few people on the tram looked over. Some rolled their eyes, a couple laughed.
Fadil bowed, returning to his seat and suppressing a cough before he spoke. ‘How was that?’
‘Pretty good. Had me convinced.’
He grinned. ‘How are your mock exams going, anyway?’
Smooth change of subject.
I looked out of the window at the trees as we went past them in the rickety tram. They were evergreens, so still lush despite it being December. A couple of places had put up decorations or signs ready for Christmas, too. On top of the fence that separated the tram from the rest of the world, an inflatable crocodile wore a Santa hat, a Merry Christmas sign taped to his side. I was so drained that the absurdity of it barely even registered.
I’d been so wrapped up in my powers, Fadil, Dominic, Dave, mock exams, and now Tessa, I hadn’t even had time to think about Christmas approaching. I hadn’t even started Christmas shopping!
What was I going to get everyone?
‘Edie?’
I sighed, turning away from the window to look at Fadil. ‘Don’t tell Mum, but not great.’
Fadil frowned. ‘Why?’
‘I haven’t had enough time to revise. And to be honest, I don’t have the energy. I’m exhausted, mentally and physically. It’s like my brain just won’t retain information. And the harder I try, the harder it is to even remember what the date is. I misspelled my own name the other day.’
‘Damn,’ said Fadil.
‘Yeah. I just don’t know what’s wrong with me.’
‘I don’t know what’s wrong, but I can help you study if you’d like? You know I love learning new things.’
‘You’d do that?’
Fadil smiled. ‘Of course I would. You, Ben, and your mum have done so much for me already. If I can return the favour, even in a little way, I will.’
I hugged him as my eyes filled with tears. ‘You’re the best.’