Ben’s first sleepover. No big deal. Definitely no big deal.
Although the word ‘sleepover’ did make it sound like we were about fifteen.
With the fluttering in my stomach, I felt like I was. What was wrong with me? Butterflies hadn’t swarmed in my stomach since I was a teenager. Since…since Javi.
I sat on the edge of my bed and sighed. Javi had made it pretty clear he was Team Ben – even though there was no Team Ben – but that didn’t stop the guilt.
I’d planned to spend the rest of my life with Javi. When he’d died, I’d married someone else. Someone so different from Javi, he’d ended up being completely the wrong fit.
But then, Ben wasn’t exactly like him, either. He was more mature. And older. Barely, but still. Javi had been thirty when he was killed. Ben was thirty five.
Thoughts of Ben and Javi continued to torment me while I made dinner and as Edie and I sat down to eat in the living room. Usually, we would’ve had the TV on, but we didn’t because of my headache. Edie had taken to wearing headphones more often so that she could still listen to music and TV while I got the quiet I needed. I hadn’t asked her to do that, which showed how understanding she was. Despite her worries of her powers corrupting her, and what Dominic had tried to do, she was a good person, even if she didn’t realise it yet.
‘Are you sure you’re all right with this?’ I asked Edie for the hundredth time, pulling the cushion my plate was balancing on closer to me.
Edie rolled her eyes. ‘The amount of times you’ve asked me, I’m starting to wonder if you’re all right with it.’
Busted.
‘It’s just new. And different.’
Tilly watched us from beside the coffee table, hoping we’d spare her a mouthful of chicken. The fact I’d cooked her extra broccoli wasn’t as important to her as the cooked chicken she wasn’t allowed because it was slathered with onions.
Edie poked at a carrot baton on her plate, not looking up at me as she spoke. ‘Do you want to be alone forever?’
Ouch. What a question.
‘No. Of course not.’ I rotated my fork against my plate, careful not to make a noise and torment my headache.
‘Well then.’ As if that was that, she got up from the sofa and went into the kitchen. A minute later, the tap started running to signal she was washing up.
Not in the mood to eat anymore, I followed her.
‘Don’t ask again,’ she said as soon as I walked through the door.
I laughed, put my plate down, then hugged her. She squirmed, but also leaned into me.
‘Thank you.’
‘You’re welcome.’
*
Ben came over shortly after we’d washed up. Edie went to her room with Tilly and Spectre, giving Ben and me some alone time. It really was like being a teenager again. Having him there made me feel calmer, which improved my headache a little. Well, that and the happy hormones released by certain activities…
When we were finally tired enough to sleep, Ben put some earplugs in. He said it was a habit from when he’d lived with his parents, because they’d both snored. Nowadays, it helped him switch off.
Was that part of why he hadn’t heard the whistling the other day, or had he just been too far away? Why was that noise still stuck in my head, despite everything?
I lay on my side. Ben curled into me and wrapped his arm around me. It had been a long time since I’d spooned with anyone. It felt good. I fell asleep easier than I had in years.
*
I jolted awake, Ben’s arm flying off me. There it was. That whistling again.
It was still dark outside. My bedside clock said it was 3:18am.
I nudged Ben. ‘Ben. Ben! Do you hear it?’
His brown eyes flitted open. He squinted at me, taking out an earplug. ‘What’s wrong?’
‘Listen!’ I put my finger to my lips.
The whistling continued, although it didn’t seem to get louder or quieter, like it had last time. It was just a constant, annoying note, playing over and over, as if whoever was responsible had half learned how to whistle but never bothered to learn how to do it properly. It was hard to pin down or explain.
It mostly consisted of a grating noise that made me want to burst my ear drums so that I didn’t have to hear it ever again.
Oh my god, my head was going to explode if it kept going. Something about it was most definitely not normal. I just couldn’t work out what.
Ben shook his head, removing the other earplug and placing both in the case on the bedside table. ‘I don’t hear anything.’
‘How can you not? It’s really loud!’ And a bloody horrible noise, too. Could he really not hear it?
He grabbed his glasses and put them on so that he could see properly. ‘Do you have tinnitus?’
‘No my ears aren’t bloody ringing! Someone is whistling outside!’
Ben got up and looked out of the window, opening it so that he could get a better look up and down the street. The street lamps created an eerie amber haze, casting giant tree shadows up and down the road. There were no signs of life, though. Not even the distant hum of the motorway that I liked so much.
‘I don’t see anyone, but there’s a pub nearby. Maybe someone’s on their way home late.’
I wrinkled my nose. ‘The pubs closed three hours ago.’
Ben shrugged, closing the window. ‘They might’ve come from town.’
‘In the middle of the week?’
Ben yawned. ‘I’m sure it’s just the wind or something.’
A bird cawed. I joined Ben at the window to see a glowing raven fly past. A ghost raven? I hadn’t seen one of those before, but it wasn’t impossible.
‘See? It’s probably just the raven imitating something it heard.’
‘They can do that?’
‘Yeah.’
‘But if it was the raven, wouldn’t you hear it? It hasn’t stopped.’
‘Are you sure you don’t have tinnitus?’
There was no way he was going to get it, so I stomped back over to my side of the bed and pulled the covers over me. Our first sleepover and he thought I was hearing things. Good start.