The Angelic Letters Series
Book Three
Angel of Thanksgiving
1963-1982
Discover just how powerful love can be.
Your heart will never be the same again.
The following is a preview of Chapter One
Chapter One
The newlyweds had just settled into their third year of university in Saskatoon when Julean suspected something she could no longer keep to herself.
She lay in bed one night, Henry’s breathing having long since grown deep and rhythmic. Julean turned over and under the light of the moon shining through their bedroom window she could just make out the back of his shoulders. She ran her fingers up and down his back. He moaned and groaned a bit, but kept sleeping. She pushed a little harder.
“Come on, honey, go to sleep.” Henry lifted the blankets over his shoulder and rolled slightly away from his playful wife.
She moved closer and, knowing how ticklish her husband was, slowly moved her hand to his side and dug in with her fingers.
The blankets flew as Henry jumped in the air and rolled over at the same time. “What’s with you?”
“What’s with you, you mean? You never turn down my advances.”
Henry opened one eye. There was just enough light to see his wife’s face in front of his. Her eyes and white teeth glistened in the light. “Well, I could be persuaded with a little more encouragement, I guess.”
“Since when do you need persuasion?”
Henry grabbed Julean and drew her in, hard. “I guess I’m persuaded enough.” He moved to kiss her.
She quickly brought her hands up and pushed him away.
“What’s going on? First you want me and now you chuck me away?”
“Honey, I’ve got something to tell you! I haven’t had my period for over two months and I think I may be—”
“Are you pregnant?” Henry sat up and looked at her. He couldn’t read her expression in the darkness. He felt more than saw her nod.
“I’m pretty sure. I made an appointment to see the doctor on Friday for confirmation.”
“Oh, honey, that’s wonderful! I can’t believe it! We’ve only been married a couple of months.”
“It only takes once, you know.”
“Well, I guess we have done it a couple of times,” Henry chuckled as he settled back down into the bed. He looked into his wife’s eyes and murmured, “I love you, Momma.”
“I love you too, Daddy.”
Henry drew Julean in gently and caressed her. Within moments their lips found each other in the moonlit room. They made love, falling asleep in each other’s arms.
Around three in the morning, Julean felt Henry’s fingers run up and down her back. She turned over to face him.
“Why am I not surprised?”
“Oh, Mommy, you’re just toooo irresistible.”
With each passing day Henry and Julean got more excited about their baby. They had called home and told each of their parents. Henry’s mom and dad welcomed the news with joy, but Julean’s had reservations. Would this affect their daughter’s education? Julean assured them that she would definitely complete her degree but also told them she wouldn’t be able to work in her father’s office next summer.
Henry and Julean loved their basement suite apartment. It was only four blocks south of the university and they walked back and forth to classes every day. They even came home for lunch. Some days they skipped lunch altogether and made love. That often happened when Julean slipped Henry a note just before they separated for their respective morning classes. The notes were always filled with much love and seductive luring. It seemed a little out of character for Julean, but Henry loved it and some days couldn’t get back to their apartment fast enough.
What they liked about their suite was that it was only four steps below ground level and so didn’t even seem to be in a basement. The windows were large and let a lot of light into the small kitchen and spacious living room. The landlady had fixed it up real nice with frilly curtains, and every room was painted a pale yellow so it seemed like the sun was shining all the time. It had two bedrooms; one of which was for them, of course, and the other Henry and Julean used as their study room. There was just enough space for two desks and a bookshelf.
The landlords welcomed the news too. They had four children of their own, the youngest was a boy, four years old, who often came down to visit them. Sammy and Julean hit it off immediately. But then Henry had already known that Julean was going to be a wonderful mother.
Helen, the landlady, said it would be okay if Henry and Julean wanted to repaint the second bedroom of the basement suite and turn it into a nursery. She also, quite kindly, offered to lower the rent a bit the following year when they returned to complete their last year of university.
Ever since Julean had told Henry they were expecting, Henry had felt a sort of roiling anxiety in the pit of his stomach. It was a familiar feeling; he’d felt the same way a long time ago. At first he couldn’t recall when until one day, while walking to university with Julean, he remembered it was the same feeling he’d had in Grade 9 when he’d had the ridiculous notion that Jenny might be pregnant. The feeling had stayed with him for days and then months, just like now. Henry knew Julean sensed his nervousness by the way she looked at him at times.
It sort of came to a head one night. Julean lay on the bed in her nightgown, reading a book. Henry had finished studying for a midterm exam and came to the edge of the bed to sit beside her. He placed a hand over Julean’s growing belly.
“I can’t wait for our little one to be born, Julean.”
She put down her book and looked at Henry lovingly.
“I can’t wait, either. I wonder what it is? I have a feeling it’s a girl.”
Henry put his head to her stomach and listened for the heartbeat. “I still can’t hear anything. Well, it’s only three months old, right?
Julean nodded. “Yes, I think I became pregnant while we were on our honeymoon and November is just about over.”
Henry did some quick calculations. “So we should expect our first addition in June sometime.”
Henry lay back on his side with his head resting on Julean’s belly and stared dreamily at his lovely wife. His anxiety ebbed away as it usually did in moments like this.
Julean reached out and touched Henry’s face and gently stroked his cheek. Her eyes misted as she spoke in a very soft but deliberate voice. “Hank…?”
“Hmm?” Henry’s eyes were closed, reveling in the warmth and tenderness of his wife’s touch.
“Do you love me? I mean really, really love me?”
Henry opened an eye and took Julean in to see if she was serious, then quickly sat up and met her gaze head on. When he read Julean’s earnestness, his brow wrinkled, his jaw dropped and his eyes focused even more intently on his dear, sweet wife.
He was stunned, momentarily speechless. “Of course I do, Julean, what a silly question.” Henry shook his head in disbelief, “Why would you ask such a thing…are you serious?”
Julean felt somewhat embarrassed, and yes, it was foolish. It’s just that her instincts played upon her feelings every now and then…and there was something, a part of Henry that she couldn’t explain. She’d felt it occasionally when they were dating; that his heart was divided. Divided between her and…?
Oh, I’m being ridiculous. Julean’s concern softened into a warm smile. “I’m sorry, Hank, it’s just that I love you so much. I never want to lose you.”
Henry came to Julean’s side and put his arm around her. “Julean, I love you with all my heart. Please don’t let any other thought ever enter that pretty mind of yours.” And placing his hand upon her rounding tummy, he added. “And I love our baby too. I can hardly wait until he or she is born!”
Around the first week of December sitting in class listening to a lecture on classroom discipline, the nervousness that Henry had been feeling of late suddenly skyrocketed, sending him into a panic. He shuffled in his chair as his stomach churned and then a rush unlike anything he’d ever experienced before swept from the pit of his stomach to the top of his head. His heart began to palpitate uncontrollably. He thought he was having a heart attack. He could feel the heat overtake his face and the sweat running down his armpits. He could no longer sit still as the threat of some sort of impending doom overtook him. He was embarrassed to get up and leave, but he had no choice, the fear gripping him was overwhelming
He hurried outside, his heart still pounding wildly; nausea threatening. How much longer could his heart beat this fast without giving out? he wondered. He walked slower, trying to control his racing heart. Finally, he inched his way to a bench and collapsed on the seat. He took in deep breaths of cool air hoping to calm down. His heart continued to gallop. He wished Julean was there so he could tell her how much he loved her just in case he didn’t make it. He was supposed to meet her at the Faculty of Agriculture building. It was halfway between their respective colleges.
Henry checked his watch. They were supposed to meet in another thirty-five minutes. Would he last that long?
Please dear Jesus, don’t let me die.
Suddenly the palpitations stopped and relief swept over him. Even though it was cold and there was snow all around him, he felt like a furnace inside. The perspiration covering his face gave testimony to the internal combustion he felt. Slowly Henry regained control and his worry subsided somewhat. What on earth had just happened? Was his heart starting to give out?
Another fifteen minutes until he met Julean. He decided to make his way to their meeting place. Although his heart rate was now under control, his anxiety wasn’t. He could still feel the steady churning of his stomach.
Henry was relieved to see Julean waiting for him at the corner. Her warm, welcoming smile relaxed him and the anxiety fell away from him in a rush. As they walked home, Henry shared with her what had happened.
“I don’t think it’s your heart, Hank, maybe it has to do with the pressure of university and the added responsibility of being a father and all.” Julean was going to add another possible explanation but decided not to—it had to do more with her feminine intuition that Hank was clinging to something in his past, something that could come between them. Oh it’s too foolish to discuss, Julean said to herself. And he’s already feeling the pressure.
“Yeah, that might be it,” Henry agreed. “But it sure felt like I was having a heart attack, Julean. It scared the hell out of me.”
Julean took his hand and they walked back to their apartment.
That evening, right after dinner, Henry had another attack.
Julean came to his side and felt his chest.
“My gosh, Hank, your heart is just racing. Do you want me to phone my dad and get his advice?”
Henry wasn’t sure what to do or whether he should bother his father-in-law with it. He already felt his in-laws didn’t like him much.
“No, that’s okay, hon. I’ll make an appointment to see a doctor first thing in the morning.”
Henry was relieved when the doctor told him his heart was fine. The doctor repeated much of what Julean had suggested; the pressure of university, perhaps his impending fatherhood. But he did add that these attacks could also be a culmination of past concerns adding to present ones. It reminded Henry of his worries over Jenny and what had happened to her—and the guilt he sometimes felt when his thoughts drifted to his first love.
The doctor prescribed sedatives, which Henry was reluctant to take. But once he did, the medication quickly alleviated his apprehensions and seemed to stop what the doctor called anxiety attacks. But Henry felt that the medicine was only treating the symptoms. There was something at the core of it all that he didn’t totally understand. Yet.
The young married couple could hardly wait to get home for the Christmas holidays. Julean’s expanding belly was visual proof to family and friends that she was having a baby. She was looking more and more radiant with each passing day.
Since the Carters had extra room, Henry and Julean stayed at her parents’ place. Although Mr. and Mrs. Carter were friendly, Henry felt an undercurrent of not being accepted. Julean told him not to worry himself over it, that he was married to her and not to them. She further stressed that time would make everything right. Henry wasn’t so sure; he’d thought the same would happen with Jenny’s parents but it never had.
It was great to see Mr. Engelmann, though. Neither Henry nor his parents could believe how much younger Henry’s mentor looked each time they saw him. It was as if he were taking some sort of youth pill. Wrinkles that had covered his face and circled his eyes had diminished—some even seemed to have disappeared. The slight paunch that prevented him from closing his vest all the way had all but vanished, the vest hanging so loosely it didn’t even seem to fit him anymore. It seemed his new vocation had given him a new lease on life. He was prepared to serve his Lord in his new capacity as a parish priest.
In the seventh month of Julean’s pregnancy the doctor noticed that the baby was in the breech position.
“The head is supposed to be down, not up,” said Dr. McCall.
“I guess he wants to come out running,” quipped Julean.
The doctor, however, didn’t see it as a joking matter. He worked for over twenty minutes and was finally able to turn the baby into the correct position for delivery.
Julean understood the doctor’s concern: the breech position and turning the baby to the correct one could cause the umbilical cord to become entangled around the baby’s throat.
“Well, now that we’ve got this little guy or gal in the right spot, I hope he or she stays there,” Dr. McCall smiled at Julean. “See you next month.”
“Yes, that’ll probably be the last time; we’re going back to Regina for the summer.”
“That’s right. Have you decided on a doctor there?”
“My father, Dr. Carter, is making arrangements for that and either he’ll notify you or I can tell you when I see you next month.”
Henry couldn’t get over how huge Julean was.
“My God, Julean, I’m amazed how much skin can stretch! And it’s only seven and a half months; you still have nearly two months to go. How on earth will that baby come out?”
Julean laughed, “Well, nature has looked after it all so far, Hank. The cervix does dilate quite a bit once labour starts.”
Henry was always amazed how easily Julean spoke of sex and anything else that might cause others to blush. Clearly it was a part of her upbringing, something Henry hadn’t experienced in his own family. He was getting used to it, though, and was glad their children would be raised with that kind of openness.
With the landlady’s permission, Henry and Julean started to plan the nursery. They moved their desks out into the living room, and instead of painting they decided to wallpaper the room in a nursery theme that would welcome either a boy or girl. The landlady also gave them a crib, change table and baby carriage her children had outgrown. The time was getting closer and the two of them could hardly focus on their final exams. Henry still felt an undercurrent of anxiety though; it permeated his joy.
When Julean went to see Dr. McCall for her eight-month check-up, he was dismayed to note the baby had turned breech again.
“This is my last appointment with you, Dr. McCall. I wish we were staying in Saskatoon so that you could deliver the baby.”
“Well, I’ll forward your files to your new doctor in Regina after today’s examination. Now, let’s see if we can turn this little bundle of joy.”
Julean smiled at the doctor’s words and then began to squirm as the doctor pushed and pulled on the hard wall of her womb.
“Everything’s packed and ready to go, Julean. I’m not sure you’ll fit in the car though!”
“Henry!” Julean smacked him playfully, then said, “yes, I can feel the strain on my back. Oh well, the baby will soon be here.”
“And I’ll be one very proud father!” Henry came over and kissed Julean tenderly. She held onto him for a few moments longer and gazed into her husband’s eyes.
Yes, she thought, our baby will truly unite us. And it will take away all my foolish thoughts.
Henry kissed his wife once more, then led her into the nursery. “The room sure looks nice the way you’ve decorated it, Julean.”
Julean cradled her belly in her hands. “Yes, I just love it too Hank. It was so nice of Helen to give us all her baby things. We’re ready to bring home our beautiful little angel!”