Bryce Wilson is a thirty-five-going on-eighteen-year-old, all-night disc jockey, who hosts the “Bryce at Night” show on WLUV radio. He learned his craft—if it can be called that—as an apprentice engineer/announcer for the college radio station at the SUNY campus over in Oneonta. His acne-scarred face, oily red hair, and skeleton-thin physique rule out any chances at a TV career, but Bryce’s whiskey-smooth, baritone voice makes him a natural for radio.
The local “Don Imus” has two other primary interests besides radio: photography and girls—young girls to be precise—and he has managed to combine the two in perfect harmony. Taking full advantage of his relative celebrity status with the radio station, he has parlayed his smooth talking manner and marginal photographic skills into a position as official photographer for the nearby high school in Walton. As such, he gets to photograph female gymnasts, female volleyball players, female basketball players, cheerleaders, etc., and all in an official capacity. Naturally, he is also responsible for photographing the male athletes, but his main “focus” is on the girls. In addition, he keeps a small portrait studio in the finished-basement portion of his ancient log cabin located in Delancy.
Located as it is, at the top of Bear Spring Mountain Road, the WLUV broadcast station is a bit remote, but Bryce actually prefers it that way, encouraging the more adventurous of the teenaged girls to “stop by and say ‘howdy!’” On any given evening, between eight PM and midnight, Monday through Friday, one or more of the “local beauties” can be found assisting Bryce around the radio station. If they’re lucky, Bryce might let them introduce a song, or send out a “special message” to a boyfriend or two. In return, he gets a back rub or some other form of innocuous physical contact that makes him feel attractive. Some would term these activities “cheap thrills”; Bryce just refers to them as “favors.” The girls that hang around the studio think Bryce is cool. But, to the majority of the other girls, who see him for what he is, Bryce Wilson is a creep.
However, there is one notable exception. Linda Lovendosky is just past her eighteenth birthday, only two months from graduating Walton High School—and light years away from gaining entrance to any college’s undergraduate program. However, none of that matters to Bryce Wilson. As far as he is concerned, Linda has a virtual Masters Degree, not in English or science, but in hand jobs. And, for the last six months, he has been her primary tutor in “Sex Ed,” providing expert instruction—whenever and wherever—he finds the time. Linda’s perfect figure, together with auburn hair (worn long and straight like Crystal Gayle’s), and glittering hazel-colored eyes, make her extra desirable.
Tonight, she’s with Bryce at the radio station, and he has decided that this will be her unofficial “graduation day.” She’s been begging for it, he thinks, and he’s more than willing to oblige. Since she is no longer “jail bait,” he has decided to dispense with the usual preliminaries, like the back rub and hand job, and move ahead to the “main event.”
“But, first a toast,” he says. “To Linda, the best radio assistant I’ve ever had!”
Bryce raises a jelly glass of cheap Asti Spumanti sparkling wine and clinks it against a similar glass, held aloft by a giggling Linda. “May your graduation present be exactly what you wish for,” he says.
“Yeah,” replies Linda. “Maybe something long and hard.” She bursts out laughing at her perceived wittiness. Bryce just smiles.
Linda downs her glass in one swallow, and reaches for the bottle of wine with her free hand.
“Not so quick there, honey,” says Bryce. “We gotta make it last a while, okay?”
“Oh crap, Bryce, what’s the big deal? We’re gonna drink it all eventually, aren’t we?”
“Okay, okay. Go ahead. But, save some for later.”
Placing a pre-recorded tape in the Teac reel-to-reel player, Bryce adjusts a few control knobs, makes a brief announcement over the studio microphone. “This is going out to all of you about-to-be graduates. Get your caps and gowns ready, because the big day is almost here.” He sets the tape in motion, and leans back in his chair. “Come here, baby,” he says to Linda.
The first number to come across the air is “Pomp and Circumstance,” but within the studio, the distinguished piece is almost drowned out by the sounds of giggling and lovemaking coming from the convertible sofa. Linda is finally “graduating” – way ahead of schedule.